A/N: A dozen people to thank for reviews: Shiso no Kitsune, Thunder Claw 03, hollownature, kurukurupa, Dark Inu Fan, curio cherry, Assault Godzilla, hitsugayatoushirou1220, Rukia's Reflection, Scyler, Konri Kari, SilverStella and xtheBLEACHEDalchemistx. And thank you to anyone who put this or its author on their lists.

Disclaimer: I do not own the Bleach character, manga, anime, movies, etc. They belong by copyright laws to Tite Kubo et al.

Every Teen's Worst Nightmare

Of Empty Nests and Little Sisters

The group of supernaturally powered and spiritually aware people watched the interaction between Rukia and Ichigo the day after the daiko's big fight with Byakuya. Instead of still being angry at him for creating such a disaster, the younger Kuchiki seemed to be inordinately pleased with the orange haired war hero. Something odd had happened, as the captain also seemed to be in her good graces and they knew that hadn't been the case at the end of the school day yesterday.

"It's strange," Ishida muttered catching the attention of the violet eyed Shinigami.

"What's strange, Ishida?" she asked, taking a sip of her juice.

"You're not still angry with your brother and Kurosaki."

"When they bought me the newest Chappy doll and accessories, I really couldn't stay annoyed with them."

"Kurosaki bought you a Chappy plushy?" he asked, dumbfounded. Ichigo hated that cartoon rabbit, in any form.

"Yes," she answered.

"Willingly?" the Quincy continued in disbelief.

"He offered," Rukia admitted a small smile on her face.

"Are you sure he wasn't sick when he did that?"

"I'm sure; it was shortly after Inoue healed him from his wounds. It was to make up for putting so many people in danger while he and Nii-sama fought. And Nii-sama, not to be outdone, offered to buy some accessories that had Chappy on them."

The archer blinked a couple of times before a small smirk appeared. "I see. He bribed you and to make the most of it, you played your brother for some more merchandise by mentioning Kurosaki's offer."

"Yes," she replied unrepentant. "I knew that I should take the offer when it was given. It'll probably be the last time Ichigo willingly buys anything with the name 'Chappy' on it and of course Nii-sama wasn't going to let Ichigo be the only one to get back into my good graces."

"Kuchiki-san, sometimes you can be positively frightening." Chuckling, the dark haired teen wandered away, glad that the girl he liked was not a scheming minx of a Shinigami.

Rukia watched the Quincy walk away, a laugh bubbling in her throat. That she could bend her brother to her will with careful consideration had been a pleasant surprise and she wondered how often she could do it without him catching on. She supposed that as long as it wasn't about anything truly important, Byakuya wouldn't mind humoring her on occasion. Maybe she should experiment. After all, now that he was determined to be a true elder brother, the possibilities were almost endless.

She'd have to ask Yuzu and Karin for pointers.

Ichigo had watched the entire scene between Ishida and Rukia, a shiver running down his spine at her laughter. The archer had walked away with a bemused expression and he went over to him, figuring Ishida needed to be commiserated with. "Okay, what'd she do to you?" the orange haired daiko asked, almost afraid of the answer. Her laugh had been one of devilish amusement which almost always meant trouble for him.

"Until this moment, I do not think I appreciated how much you put up with," his friend said, taking a large gulp of water from his bottle. Light reflected off of his glasses and the Quincy sighed. "I always assumed that you gave her a hard time because of your stupidity."

"Did you now? What'd she say?"

"I just mentioned that she wasn't angry with you or her brother anymore and she told me you had willingly bought her a Chappy plushy."

Ichigo looked at him under hooded eyes before sighing. "Yeah, I knew that would come back to bite me. Last night she was pissed. I was trying to save my hide before she got it into her head to use Sode no Shirayuki-san on me and the offer just popped out. I thought bribing her would at least decrease her anger. I was right, but she turned it to her advantage when she worked her magic on Byakuya too. The only good part about the whole thing was watching her brother fall into her trap."

"That would have been amusing but one little plushy couldn't have been that bad." Ishida watched one orange brow rise in disbelief.

"Did I forget to mention that she made me buy the 'Huggable' size?"

"Huggable?"

"Uh-huh," he confirmed, his gaze coasting over to his partner. She was talking about her newest acquisitions, the girls that had gathered around just as smitten with the cartoon rabbit as she was. "It stands to about her knee, not counting its ears."

"Ah," the archer murmured. "So she not only got to milk her brother, she got to drain your wallet," he commiserated.

"And you think she puts up with a lot."

"My apologies."

"Thank you, at least someone's sympathetic. My sisters just laughed."

"As I thought, she can be quite frightening when she puts her mind to it," Ishida said and walked away shaking his head.

"You don't know the half of it," Ichigo muttered and rejoined the other males to finish his lunch. It was better if no one ever saw what she did when she tried to use electronics she'd never seen before. Now that was truly frightening. The rice cooker had been the last machine she'd tried to operate.

He hadn't known rice could fly that far.

While Ichigo was contemplating his petite partner, Byakuya was likewise mulling over his sister. "I was played," he mused, an appreciative gleam coming to his eyes. Rukia had played on his need to outdo Kurosaki and gotten him to buy her things she clearly didn't need. Along with a few barrettes, he'd purchased her a new drawing pad and a set of colored pens with the rabbit's caricature on them.

"I'm sorry, did you say something Kuchiki-sensei?" a young student teacher asked, looking up from her own lunch.

"Forgive me, I did not mean to speak aloud," he apologized.

"Oh, don't worry about it. I've talked to myself more since coming here than I did all throughout high school. These students sure test your mettle."

"Indeed." She's completely clueless, he thought. If she knew just how trying the students were, she'd run screaming from the building and never return.

"Oh, today's your last day, isn't it, sir?" the woman continued, oblivious of the noble's desire to continue with his private thoughts. "I heard the principal say that Ochi-sensei was returning tomorrow."

"Will it be Thursday so soon?" he questioned as if it came as a surprise. Silently he was rejoicing. The project was almost over and his time in the Living World was nearing its end. Not to mention his forced cohabitation with Ichigo Kurosaki.

"Mm-hmm, aren't you glad it's almost the weekend?"

"I will be returning to my duties once I am done here."

"That's right, you're only on leave. Well, let me be the first to say that it was a pleasure to work with you, sir. And thank you for your dedication to our country's safety and security."

"It is an honor," he replied. There was no need for her to know that he defended a lot more than the living. With another bright smile she let him go back to his thoughts, and the rest of his lunch.

Turning his chair to look out the window, Byakuya returned to his contemplation. His little sister was truly coming into her own, no longer afraid of showing him her true personality. It wasn't so long ago that she would have silently done as he commanded, without thought to what she wanted. Perhaps meeting the orange haired brat had done some good.

During his time with them he had heard her laugh, seen her smile more often than she ever had before and talked back at him without hesitation. Not in a way that disrespected their relationship or his position as leader of their clan but in a teasing way that spoke of genuine sibling affection.

When her electronic child had held him captive she had ignored his demand that she take it away with a laugh and when she had been truly mad at him, she'd let him know without a doubt that she wasn't pleased. Even last night when she had conned him into buying things for her, it had been an honest reflection of her cunning nature. She'd known that he didn't like Ichigo to buy her presents so she'd used that to her advantage. Despite the fact that her duplicity had been at his expense, he couldn't help but be proud of her. He'd just have to let her know that it wouldn't always work.

It was too soon to let her know how tightly he was wrapped around her finger.

Ichigo closed his lunch box before standing to throw away his garbage. He snagged Rukia's empty juice box and straw wrapper on his way by without being asked and let her continue to talk with her friends. Her eyes met his briefly in thanks but that was the extent of their communication. Their friends pretended not to see anything and allowed the Shinigami a private moment, figuring that they hadn't gotten much time alone during Byakuya's stay in the Human World.

Ten minutes later the captain returned to the classroom and approached his sister, waiting until she acknowledged his presence before saying anything. "Imouto," he began, his tone not as commanding as it usually was. When he spoke, people listened and he had learned over the decades of his captaincy how to inflect his authority without effort into his tone of voice.

"Did you need something, Nii-sama?" she inquired, her violet eyes widening in polite curiosity.

The daiko sat up and appeared to tune into their conversation, as always aware of any change in his sister's mood. "I do hope you enjoy your new drawing materials."

"Yes, thank you, Nii-sama. The new markers have a much finer point on them than my older ones."

"Indeed." That was one of the reasons he had let her cajole him into buying them in the first place. The quality had been much better than her old ones. "You will work hard on honing your skills then."

"Most definitely," she replied, sudden suspicion entering her voice. "Ichigo is always critiquing my work."

"Is he?" Byakuya asked, momentarily derailed from his intent. Turning to look at the orange haired teen, he saw the boy's eyebrow twitch in either disgust or impatience he couldn't tell which. "Very well. Having someone else's opinion can help."

"Was that all, Nii-sama?" Rukia asked, wondering why he had chosen to speak to her now. Usually he saved the personal comments for when they were alone. Her friends had moved back to their own desks, the bell that signaled the end of lunch having just rung.

"It is," he affirmed. "After all, Kuchiki must perfect all of her skills," he said, walking away.

Rukia blinked in confusion for several seconds before understanding dawned. "Drat," she muttered while Ichigo chuckled next to her.

"He found you out," the war hero said, amber eyes alight with laughter. "Looks like he understands your nature far better than you thought. I bet you won't be able to do that again."

"Humph, it only means I'll have to choose my battles."

Ichigo sighed and glanced at the noble. "He's really turned into a big brother since the first time I beat him. If it's the little things, I don't think he'd mind giving you almost anything you asked for."

"Speaking from experience?" Rukia asked, suddenly amused. She had seen the girls wheedle trinkets, candy, and ice cream cones out of him more than once to know that big brothers were susceptible to their baby sisters.

"Yeah, much to my wallet's chagrin," he grumbled before taking out the textbook for their next lesson.

Rukia smiled, knowing that even if he didn't show it, he really did love his sisters and was still trying to make up for his absences in the war. Yuzu and Karin didn't really mind as they now knew how important his training and fights had been but that didn't mean they weren't going to get back a little of their own. A new soccer ball or plushy here and there were about the extent of their revenge but each time Ichigo forked over some money they'd exchange a grin and happily leave him without a penny to his name. And if by some chance he did have anything left, Rukia herself would take off with it, going with the twins to help them in their purchases.

"Perhaps I should ask for pointers," she mused, as if the idea had just come to her.

"Don't even…" Ichigo warned. The last thing he needed was for the girls to swap ideas with the petite Shinigami. He half suspected they stayed up late just to think up of ways to aggravate him anyway. "Besides, if you want ideas on how to wrap Byakuya around your finger, I doubt Yuzu and Karin would be of any help."

"No?" she asked, her lips twitching. She fought the smile that wanted to spring forth as her brother called the class to attention.

"Byakuya would have to be like me for it to work," Ichigo admitted.

"And of course, you're nothing alike."

"Exactly." Rukia did laugh softly then and opened to the page that her brother mentioned. The similarities between the Shinigami daiko and captain were too many to speak of.

Not if she wanted to prevent a war.

Byakuya pretended that his sister wasn't acting as if she needed a trip to Squad Four's Psychiatric Ward. Her lips were curved in feminine amusement and she kept shooting her orange haired friend glances out of the corner of her eye. If he hadn't known better he'd say she was flirting but Rukia wasn't the kind of person to do that in front of an entire group of people. Kurosaki must have done something to amuse her and she was doing her best not to laugh out loud.

Considering that the possibilities were almost endless, the noble guessed he should be grateful she was managing to keep quiet. "You may put your history books away for the moment," he announced. "It is time to discuss your Health Studies project."

"Is it over?" Chizuru asked hopefully. She hadn't liked the doll from the start and would be glad when she could hand it back and walk away.

"Almost. Tomorrow your teacher will return from her vacation and you will return the dolls to Urahara. Tonight your assignment is to write a paper of no less than one page on how you felt about the whole project and what you learned from the experience."

"So this is your last day, Kuchiki-sensei?" a girl asked. Her name escaped him and the captain couldn't for the life of him remember.

"Indeed. It is has been an interesting experience, to say the least."

"You should have said something earlier, we would have had a party," Tatsuki said, giving him a grin that said it would have celebrated his departure, not mourned it.

"That is unnecessary, Arisawa."

"Are you going back to the JSDF?" another student asked, this one's eyes bright with curiosity.

"Indeed."

"Where are you assigned?"

"That is classified," Byakuya returned. Two thirds of the class wouldn't believe him even if he told the truth.

"Aw, that's no fair. If it's classified, that means we can't write and ask you to come back," the girl whose name he couldn't remember lamented.

"Don't worry, Yuki, as long as Kuchiki-san stays here, you'll at least get to see him at her graduation," a friend of hers consoled.

"That's right," the girl said. "You are staying, aren't you, Kuchiki-san?" she asked Rukia, hope in her eyes. The dark haired teen obviously had a large crush on Byakuya.

"If she continues to excel in her studies, I do not see a reason to remove her from Karakura High," Byakuya said unwillingly, as if the decision for her to stay was entirely up to him.

Ichigo smirked at him briefly before turning the look on his sister. Something significantly passed between them and he got the feeling it had nothing to do with their relationship as Shinigami partners. For her part, Rukia seemed to groan, her earlier amusement gone. Perhaps she had fooled him in more ways than one. He had always assumed she had taken her education here in the Living World seriously so as to appear human.

"Is something the matter, Rukia?" he asked, giving her a look that let her know he'd figured her out.

"No, Nii-sama. I would enjoy graduating from Karakura High."

"I thought you would," he commented. The former ryoka chuckled and stretched his arms behind him. "Kurosaki?" Byakuya questioned.

"Not a thing, sensei."

"Very well, if no one has further questions, we will move on to our next subject." Several students looked like they wanted to say something but the finality in his voice let them know that he would not allow anymore delays. Glancing at the clock, he resisted the urge to sigh. There were only the afternoon classes to get through as well as one more night in the presence of a mechanical doll before he could return to his normal routine.

There was something to be said for the monotony of paperwork.

When the final bell rang, every member of the "Substitute Group" and Byakuya sighed in relief. The noble picked up the lesson plans Ochi-sensei had given him and made his way to the teachers' room. The brunette waited for him there, a large smile on her face, looking refreshed and untroubled. "So, Kuchiki-taicho, how was the experience? I trust you've found your sister's curriculum acceptable?"

"Aside from the questionable Heath Studies project that ends tomorrow."

"Personally I thought it was unnecessary but the principal is of an older generation and was concerned about such things. The only thing I wished I could have seen was the look on their faces the morning after having the dolls for the first time."

If you wanted to see it, why did you take a vacation? Byakuya thought irritably. "It was rather amusing," he allowed. Or it would have been had he been awake enough to enjoy the expressions of the students as they struggled to stay awake.

"Does that mean I will have the pleasure of Kuchiki-san's presence in my class for the foreseeable future?" Ochi looked at her substitute, thinking that he looked just as handsome with his hair pulled back as he had with those hair accessories he'd been wearing the first time she'd seen him.

"Indeed, as long as her grades continue to be acceptable."

"Excellent. I hereby release you from your duties as a substitute teacher, Captain Kuchiki. Thank you for your time and effort." She bowed lowly, figuring that he'd like that better than a handshake. Apparently she was right for his cold grey eyes softened almost imperceptibly.

"It was different," Byakuya replied, inclining his head briefly. "I bid you good day, and goodbye, Ochi-san," he said, turning to leave.

"You're welcome back any time!" she called after him, laughing in delight when he made a sound that coming from any lesser being would have been a snort.

Byakuya barely stopped the grimace that wanted to twist his lips. The day he taught Kurosaki and his friends again was the day Hell froze over.

Byakuya was directing the servants to pack what little he had brought with him to the World of the Living while Rukia and Ichigo did their homework. He had given out very little, wanting the students to concentrate on the Health Studies paper. It was almost dinner time when he found the two younger Zanpakutou wielders staring at their doll. Both had mirroring pensive looks and he was tempted to leave them to their contemplation but he didn't want them thinking too much about things. There was no telling what foolish idea they'd get into their heads (or more likely Kurosaki would get and Rukia would go along with just to keep him out of trouble) if he left things alone.

"Rukia, Kurosaki, dinner will be soon. You can return to your project afterwards."

"Hmm? Oh, yes, Nii-sama, coming." Rukia stood and held her hand out to the electronic child, smiling at it when it took her fingers in its pudgy appendage. For all of Urahara's mischief, he really was a genius.

"Mama?" Raiden questioned, toddling next to her. "Tou?" he asked, looking over his shoulder at the tall young man walking behind them.

"You've been a good boy today," Rukia praised. For some reason she was beginning to become sad at the thought of returning him in the morning.

"I'm surprised," Ichigo agreed. "Maybe he got used to being with Eriko-san during the day." He'd have to think of something to get the maid in thanks for all her extra work. Looking after three dolls that Urahara created to annoy them couldn't have been easy.

"Ko-tan," the toddler said with a smile, spotting the maid as she passed them in the hall.

"He gave you a nickname," Rukia said, smiling.

"I think his computer figured a child his age wouldn't be able to say my full name so it settled on something age appropriate." Eriko shrugged, glad that the project was at an end. Only one night left and then they could all go home.

Ichigo understood her feelings completely, anticipating the day when he could go to bed at a reasonable hour and not be woken up in the middle of the night by a screaming doll. The Hollows that plagued his town were disturbed his sleep enough. They didn't need any help from one of Urahara's inventions.

"It hasn't been all bad, has it?" Rukia asked curiously. She sat at the table, directing her "son" to do the same.

"Sleepless nights, growing electronic babies that walk, talk, and emit their own reiatsus, and in some cases use spiritual energy to destroy stuff. No, nothing bad about that," Eriko returned, remembering a particular instance where the Quincy's doll had had a tantrum and blown a hole in the wall. Luckily she and the other servants had been able to patch it up before her lord had gotten home.

"And the yelling," Ichigo put in. "Can't forget the yelling," he reiterated.

"Spoil sports. You can't forget how cute he looks when he is asleep. Or when he looked at Nii-sama and called him 'Uncle' and shouted 'bankai.'"

Ichigo's lips twitched, giving his amusement away, Eriko chuckling. "All right, that was funny," the older female soul allowed.

"I am glad you were entertained," the noble cut in, looking at his sister and her friends wryly.

"Bya-ji!" Raiden shouted, reaching across the low table to the captain.

"Sit still," the clan leader ordered, surprised when the doll listened to him. "At least he learns," Byakuya said.

"There is that," the maid said, giving one last smile before excusing herself.

The noble waited until dinner was served before studying the two younger Shinigami. "Perhaps you two would like to tell me exactly why you were so thoughtful earlier?"

"Just thinking about the project, Nii-sama."

"I'm surprised you've taken it to heart so much."

"Raising a child is a serious matter, Nii-sama," Rukia answered, remembering the children she had helped raise in Inuzuri before Renji and she had gone to the Academy.

"I see," he replied, seeing the saddened look come into her eyes. "This doll is not like those you lost in the Rukon."

"I know," Rukia said but couldn't help the feeling of loss she was starting to experience anyway.

"Don't worry, midget. If you want to visit him, I'm sure we can convince Urahara to keep him in storage. Or give him to you. We do have to pay him a visit after school tomorrow, remember."

"No, it's best to let him go," Ichigo's partner sighed.

"If that's what you want," he said, resisting the urge to place his hand gently on her head. Byakuya would sever it at the wrist if he did such a thing. "I think you're just having a case of 'Empty Nest Syndrome,'" the daiko said.

"Empty Nest?" both siblings echoed.

"Yeah, it's the feeling parents sometimes get when their kids move out of the house after years of living together. Or something like that. I've heard a few of the oba-sans talk about it at Dad's clinic. It's perfectly naturally, although if you're feeling it this bad for a doll, I can't imagine what you'd feel for your own kid when he or she moved out," Ichigo said thoughtfully.

"There is a simple solution to that," Byakuya put in. "The Kuchiki heir does not move out."

Ichigo opened his mouth to retort but one look at the surprised look on Rukia's face stopped him. "Yeah, I guess that's one way to handle it," he muttered, pitying the non-existent child.

"Thank you, Nii-sama, I feel better already." Rukia smiled brightly at her brother and began to eat. "You'd better hurry up and eat, Ichigo, we still have to write that report."

"Yeah, yeah," he said and picked up his rice. Not move out? He'd go crazy in a month if he couldn't get away from his dad for at least college. Living under the constant scrutiny of Byakuya Kuchiki for the whole of his life would be torture. Rukia's kid wouldn't have to do that if he had anything to say about it.

Too busy plotting ways of thwarting Byakuya, Ichigo didn't realize the significance of his thoughts.