A/N: Okay, so honestly, I don't even know why I'm writing this, especially because I am more of a Cargan fan than a Jagan fan myself. This is rated T for Jagan innuendos.
Disclaimer: I own nothing. Less than nothing even. What's a number less than nothing? Negative infinity. Yes, I own negative infinity. Even though technically infinity isn't an integer, so is it therefore really considered a number? Right, shutting up now. This was supposed to just be a disclaimer…
The boys of Big Time Rush had a rare day off, but because of the thunderstorm raging outside, they were stuck inside. Katie and Mrs. Knight left for a day trip before the thunderstorm even hit Los Angeles.
Kendall was walking down the hallway when he saw a rather curious sight; Carlos had his ear pressed up against the door to the bedroom that James and Logan shared. Every so often, Kendall's roommate would clamp a hand over his mouth and giggle. Kendall arched his eyebrows at one of his best friends.
"What are you doing?" Kendall asked.
Carlos momentarily stopped what he was doing so that he could turn towards Kendall and glare at him. "Shh! Will you be quiet, Kendall? I'm trying to listen!"
"Listen to what exactly?"
Carlos looked up towards the ceiling as if the answer was somewhere up there or something. He didn't know how to explain what it was he was listening to; he wasn't even sure if any words could do it justice. So instead, he grabbed the back of Kendall's head, and all but slammed his face into the closed bedroom door. Now, both boys each had an ear pressed up against the door.
"Have you really never done this before?" James asked.
"What do you think?" Logan retorted.
Kendall heard Carlos snicker beside him. He rolled his eyes at his helmet-wearing best friend. Mrs. Knight wouldn't let Katie watch Fox anymore; maybe she should also stop Carlos from watching Fox.
"I don't know if I feel comfortable with this," Logan commented.
"Will you relax?" James replied.
Carlos covered his mouth with one hand, and with his other hand, he clutched his ribs which started to protest due to all the laughter. Carlos may not be the brightest crayon in the box, but he had a pretty good idea what was going on in there, and it was hilarious. James and Logan had closed the bedroom door and everything.
"What if we get caught?" Logan asked.
"Who's going to catch us? Katie and Mama Knight are out on a day trip. Kendall and Carlos won't say anything. They do this a lot," James answered.
Carlos scoffed, and had an incredulous look on his face. Kendall had a goofy grin on his face as he took in Carlos' reaction. Carlos mouthed the words 'We do not!' to Kendall. The leader couldn't help but smirk.
"Besides, even if we do get caught, I'll just tell the truth; this was all my idea," James said.
Kendall had no idea what was going on behind closed doors with James and Logan, but surely it wasn't what Carlos apparently thought it was, was it? No, Kendall was sure there was some other explanation for what he heard. There had to be!
"There has to be some other way!" Logan remarked.
"Oh, there is, but the other way is so much more work," James responded.
Okay, now even Kendall had to admit that just sounded…wrong. Meanwhile, Carlos was cackling like a hyena. All thoughts of subtlety were thrown out the window as Carlos was now full on laughing.
"Did you hear something?" Logan asked.
Kendall and Carlos were in panic mode as they heard the sound of approaching footsteps. Every limb on their body seemed to want to move in an entirely different direction. Kendall tried to go one way while Carlos tried to go the other way, and the two of them ended up having a meeting of the minds.
"Ow!" they both cried out simultaneously as they massaged their newly bruised foreheads.
"I think someone's out there," Logan said.
Kendall and Carlos exchanged worried looks with one another.
"Go, go, go!" Kendall instructed in a loud whisper.
They just made it around the corner when they heard the sound of an opening door. Kendall clamped a hand over Carlos' mouth, and Carlos clamped a hand over Kendall's mouth. Both boys were afraid to so much as breathe because that might blow their cover.
Kendall and Carlos both breathed a huge sigh of relief when they heard the sound of a door closing. Then Kendall had a troubling thought; what if they weren't out of the woods quite yet? What if Logan and/or James was camped out in the hallway? Or worse, what if they were coming?
"Go look and see if the coast is clear," Kendall ordered.
"No way! You go look!" Carlos retorted.
Carlos smacked Kendall in the shoulder.
Kendall knew what Carlos was trying to do; he was trying to goad him into having a slap fight with him. Kendall closed his eyes and sighed heavily.
"I'm not Logan. I won't get into a sissy slap fight with you," Kendall said.
Carlos slapped Kendall upside his head.
"Hey! Who are you calling a sissy?" Carlos demanded.
Kendall kept mentally reminding himself that Carlos was only trying to force a confrontation. He wanted Kendall to get into an argument with him. Well, Kendall wasn't going to give Carlos the satisfaction. He was going to be the bigger person.
Carlos had a horrible thought; he was so busy being distracted by Kendall that he might have missed something. There was no telling what James and Logan might have done or said. Carlos cautiously poked his head around the corner, and took a peek.
"The coast is clear," Carlos announced.
Kendall had a triumphant grin on his face. Carlos just did what Kendall had asked him to do even if Carlos wasn't aware of that fact. Kendall was just as eager to listen in on James and Logan as Carlos was. There was no way he was more eager than Carlos though. Because of the thunderstorm, the cable was out, and Carlos got bored easily. Right now, James and Logan were Carlos' entertainment. It wasn't long before Kendall and Carlos had resumed their previous positions with their ears pressed flat against the door.
"I know this is a little rough for you, but it gets easier. I promise," James said.
Carlos clamped both hands over his mouth in a last-ditch effort to stifle his laughter. Even Kendall's jaw had dropped, and he raised an eyebrow. There was an amused expression on his face as well.
Kendall remembered all that his mother told him about James and Logan back when they saved up money to buy those ridiculously overpriced sneakers. Apparently, his mom caught James and Logan in several compromising positions on multiple occasions. She caught them jumping up and down while holding hands. She caught them hugging. She caught them rolling around on the floor together. They even asked to borrow some of her make up and nail polish.
Still, nothing could have quite prepared Kendall for this new development. He always knew that James and Logan were close; he just never thought James and Logan were this close. Maybe there was something to what his mother said after all. To think, he didn't even believe her when she told him what she witnessed.
"Fine. Just hurry up and get this over with," Logan stated.
Kendall mirrored Carlos' actions and clamped both hands over his mouth in an attempt to muffle his laughter. The two boys exchanged amused glances with one another, but soon they couldn't even look at each other without bursting into even more laughter.
Carlos thought this was kind of like a car crash; as awful as a car crash is, as much as you probably shouldn't look, you wind up looking anyway. Only, in the case of James and Logan, Carlos and Kendall weren't looking (thank God!) but listening even though they probably shouldn't.
"You know James, if you're having problems, I can help you," Logan said.
Kendall didn't know how much more of this he could take. It was just too funny. On the flip side, this was kind of like a roller coaster; fun and zany. Kendall wasn't sure he wanted the ride to end quite yet.
Carlos thought back to when James told him that he always sides with Kendall. While that may be true, Logan always sides with James. Carlos never thought much of it. James was a chick magnet and Logan was in an on-again-off-again relationship with Camille. Carlos wondered how long this had been going on between James and Logan. How could he not have seen this until now? They're his best friends! Shouldn't he know this about his best friends?
"No need. I'm done now. See? That wasn't so bad, was it?" James asked.
Kendall felt a strange sensation deep in the pit of his stomach. All of a sudden, he didn't find this situation so amusing anymore. He wasn't sure how to describe this feeling churning inside of him. Was it jealousy? After all, it wasn't that long ago that he and Logan used to be thick as thieves. Now Kendall was yesterday's news.
There was a bitter taste in Kendall's mouth as he thought about James. After all, James said so himself earlier that this had all been his idea. Logan was indecisive and caved easily; James no doubt pressured Logan into this. Kendall had always been protective of his friends; he had always been protective of Logan. Never in his wildest dreams though did he ever think that he would have to protect Logan from James.
Kendall had heard enough. He'd had enough. He twisted the doorknob, and busted into the room, shouting, "Break it up, you two!"
Carlos followed behind him, his eyes squeezed shut tightly. "I hope you're decent. Please tell me you're decent!"
Kendall was surprised when he found James and Logan were both fully clothed. The two of them were sitting on the foot of Logan's bed huddled around a math textbook.
"Decent? What are you talking about? James was just copying the answers from the back of the book," Logan said.
A/N: Okay, so I have a feeling this was either an epic WIN or an epic FAIL. I mean you'll either have found this really hilarious or bordering on offensive. What can I say? I have a weird sense of humor.