There he stood.
Indiana Jones, staring straight into Adolf Hitler's eyes from across the room.
'So, it has come to this' Indy said as a smirk formed on his face.
'Ja, it has,' Hitler said, muffling a laugh, as his funny-looking moustache tickled his nostrils.
Hitler quickly gripped his favourite gun from his belt and aimed it at Indy Jones, but our hero (that's Indy btw, if you thought Hitler was the hero) grabbed his whip from his own belt and flung it towards Adolf's gun.
The whip wrapped around the gun and Indy pulled it from Hitler's grasp, dropping it to the floor. This all happened without breaking eye contact.
The atmosphere intensified as they stared deep into each other's eyes, sweat dripping off their creased brows. Then it happened – Adolf Hitler closed his eyes.
'Hah! You blinked!' Shouted Indy Jones while pumping his fist in victory.
'NEIN!' Hitler screamed, smashing his fist on the table.
'EIGHT!' Indy screamed back, 'you lost the staring contest, now hand the keys of your Ferrari over.'
Adolf reluctantly reached into the inside pocket of his fancy leather Gucci jacket to pull out the keys to his red Ferrari sports car. Indy cracked his whip and used it to grab the keys.
'Thanks buddy' Indy said, 'You still coming to Poker Night with George Washington and Matt Damon on Thursday night?'
'Nein you dirty swine!' Hitler spat as he spoke with heaps of spit coming out, forming a small puddle on his desk, 'I have no way to get there!'
Indy began to stroke his imaginary beard while looking thoughtfully towards the ceiling. Adolf stared at the ceiling as well, trying to figure out what Indiana Jones was staring at.
TWO HOURS LATER...
Indy was still stroking his imaginary beard while looking at the ceiling and Adolf had started playing Call of Duty: Black Ops 2: White Ops on his Xbox 360.
'HAH, TAKE THAT YOU DIRTY NAZI' He screamed as he killed the dirty German soldiers on the screen.
Suddenly, an idea popped into Indy's head.
'I'VE GOT IT!' He exclaimed. He ran over to the xbox and turned it off while Hitler was still playing.
'HEY! I was –' Adolf started until Indy interrupted.
'Shut it, I have an idea' Indy placed his hand over Hitler's mouth to shut him up. Hitler started licking Indy's hand while it covered his mouth. Indy gave Hitler a look that said 'ewwww, you gay.' To which Hitler returned with a look that said 'wtf does that look mean?'.
'What's this idea you swine?' Hitler spat at Indy.
'We'll go to..' Indy looked at the ground and spoke slowly. He moved his head upwards so he was glancing sideways at Hitler in what seemed like slow-mo, but was just normal-mo but slower.
'A used car dealer...' He said slowly, watching Hitler out the side of his eyes. The duo ran out of Hitler's study to the garage where Indy's new Ferrari he won off of Hitler was. Hitler was shaking with anticipation of getting a new car as he got into the passenger seat. Indy put the key in the ignition and turned it sideways.
They turned the radio up to full volume and sang along to 'Baby' by Justine 'I-Suck' Bieber, and laughing out loud. That is, until it happened. Indiana Jones put his foot on the ignition and was excited to drive his new Ferrari... but the car didn't move. The pair looked at the gas meter to realise the worst...
'The Ferrari...' Indy gasped.
'It's... it's out of gas.' Hitler whispered as his hand flew to his mouth in shock horror.
'' Indy screamed as tears started falling down his cheeks.
'What do we do now?' Hitler screamed as he shook Indy by his shoulders.
'We.. we must walk,' Indy replied like a true action hero would, in a deep, smooth, slow voice while staring into the sun. The duo tried to hide their tears as they got out of the car and began walking towards the Used Car Dealer, leaving the shiny red Ferrari behind. As they walked away from Hitler's beach house in Malibu, the camera hung back and focussed on something on the shelf in the garage. As the camera zoomed in, it became clear it was a full bottle of gas labelled 'Gas for the Shiny Red Ferrari, use when gas is empty.'
Then the camera rotated back to focus on the duo walking away as a Suspenseful remix of the Indiana Jones theme tune played in the background.