A.N.- When you get seventeen positive reviews for a one-shot that took you an hour to write, you know you have to continue. So here I go!
Hi there, reading person! Master's gone again, and Piggy doesn't really talk to me anymore - not that he talked very much in the first place - so I guess it's just you and me!
Wow, it sure is boring when master ain't around. There's nothing to do but sit around and watch TV! Oh well, let's go see what shows are on right now! ... Trading Spaces? I haven't seen that one before. I wonder what it's about?... Home decorating? That looks so easy! All I gotta do is find something pretty and stick it to the wall! I can't wait to see master's face when he comes home and sees how pretty I made everything!
I switch off the TV and get up from the couch. What pretty thing should I stick to the wall? What would master like best?
Master! Master always looks so pretty in his invader costumes! I can stick them to the wall! So I run off to the kitchen and I dive into the toilet. I can't wait 'till master sees! He'll love me so much!
The toilet swirlies me down to master's science place, and I run down a hall to master's sleeping room. It Is always locked so that I can't get in, But that's okay! All I have to do is break the door down.
Master likes to keep all his clothes in his closet hanging from little hooky thingies. I just grab 'em and pull 'em down. Then I run! See me running? I'm running! You can run with me! I go aaaall the way up to the living room so I can make the base pretty!
Yay! Now I just have to put it on the wall aaaaannnnd...
Why'd it fall? Doesn't it like to be on the wall? Why's it laying down and being lazy? Oh yeah! I have to stick it to the wall with something! Heh, heh...
What do I use? Chocolate bubble gum is sticky! I can use that! Hee Hee Hee! I keep some in the couch cushion!... Why you looking at me like that?
Here it is! All I gotta do is stick my Master's clothes to the wall...
When I'm done, I just sit in he middle of the room an' look at all the little pink shirts stuck to everything. I wonder what the big-head boy's clothes would look like up on the ceiling? Eh, maybe later. I don't feel like playing Tradin' Spaces no more.
I know! I'll try on one of master's tunics! I wanna be just like him when I grow up. Maybe if I practice being him, I will be a better at it.
There, I've got a tunic on. It's too big! I look like a lady! Hee, hee, hee!
I'm gonna pretend to be master, okay? I'm gonna yell and shout and generally be grouchy, but don't be sad; I'm just pretending.
YOU DISGUSTING HUMAN! I HATE THIS PLANET! YOUR HEAD BUBBLES WITH BRAIN POOP! DIB'S MOM WEARS OPEN TOED COMBAT BOOTS! SKOOL IS NOTHING BUT AN OVERSIZED BRAINWASHING SYSTEM! GLOBAL WARMING IS BECAUSE OF HUMAN STUPIDITY! FARRETS ARE THE WORLDS MOST DANGEROUS ANIMALS! NO GOLDFISH SHOULD EVER BE VOTED PRESIDENT!
What do you think? Did I sound like master? Heh, heh...Actually I was just replaying some recordings I picked up from him before he went to skool this morning. I do that alot when he says something funny.
Imma watch some more TV.
I really wanna watch The Scary Monkey Show, but they canceled it a few weeks ago. I remember when master told me, I got all sad and I was crying so my master let me sit on his lap for a while until I felt better. I don't remember what happened after that, but I think I fell asleep.
Wow, I miss master while he's gone. I wish he was here to watch TV with me and eat my waffles. Maybe I will get into my doggie costume and lie on master's lap! Maybe he will pet me! And then he'll tell me what a good job I did making the house pretty. I like it when master tells me I did a good job, cause it means he likes me more then he does when I'm a naughty little robot. He's so scary when he's yelling...
Oh yeah... I was gonna watch TV wasn't I?
We welcome you back to the tragic saga of Barbara Manitee in the daytime drama: Endangered Love.
Ooooh, I haven't seen this one before. Be quiet; I wanna hear.
"Please don't cry, Barbara!
You're a nice manitee!
You've been so good to me!
But I must Go into the world and do nobal things for the good of all!
And you can't come because you don't speak French."
Gasp! My hands touch my mouth in horror. What a mean man! Barbara can't come with him just because she doesn't speak French? How awful! How terrible! And would you quit talking? I wanna see what happens next!
"But if you leave, Phill,
Who will take me to the ball?
Who's going to take me to the ball, Phill?
I have my new dress and shoes,
and new manitee lipstick!
Who will take me to the ball?"
Oh my gosh! She's right! Someone has to take her to the ball, or she will have gotten new manitee lipstick for nothing! And everyone knows how hard it is to find manitee lipstick nowadays! I can't let that happen!
"I'll take you to the ball, Barbara Manitee!" I cry, springing off the couch.
"Please don't go!"
No! If Phil won't go to the ball with Barbara then I will! I'll sing a song for her! Maybe she will hear me, and she will go with me to the ball instead.
Barbara Manitee! (Manitee, Manitee)
You are the one for me! (one for me, one for me)
Sent from up above! (Manitee from above)
You are the one I love!
Now I'm tangoing around the room, pretending that Barbara Manitee is dancing with me. Actually, will you pretend to be Barbara for me? You'll just have to get on your knees so I don't have to reach up so high... Oops, sorry! I'm a little bit clumsy. Heh, heh... back to singing!
Barbara Manitee!(Manitee, Manitee)
I'll be your mon ami!(Mon ami, Mon ami)
I'll take you to the ball! (to the ball, to the ball)
I hope you're not too tall. (You might have trouble dancing!)
I don't think she hears me. She's still talking to that "Phil" jerk.
"Phill, I've learned French."
"Mais, oui. Je suis Manitee. See?"
"Oui, oui mon ami!
I always knew you could.
I really hoped you would.
Now can we go into the world and do nobal things for the good of all?"
"Yes! But first, Phil...
Will you take me to the ball?"
"... I can't dance."
My jaw drops.
"...I must go."
"Please don't go!"
I can' believe it! Phil couldn't dance all along? Oh my gosh! Now I have to take Barbara to the ball! People tell me I'm a good dancer.
Oh Barbara Manitee (Manitee, Manitee)
you are the one-
"-Gir, master will be home in approximately twenty seconds." The computer interrupts me.
I shriek in surprise and hide behind your leg.
"If you want your human friend to live, I suggest you hide them before he opens the door."
Oh no! The computer is right! We have to hide you... Ooh! Go in the coat closet!... Well, yeah the roboparents are in there, but they're sleeping right now... Just go in! I don't want master to see you!
Master comes in the door looking happy. I love it when master is happy! Stay here and be quiet; I'm gonna go say hi.
"Hi, master! I miss-ed you!" I say as I run up and hug him. I notice that he's wearing an orange uniform instead of a red one. Did he go to skool like that?
"Uh... hi, Gir." He says. Then he pulls my arms off of him and puts me back on the ground. When he does that, it means he's done hugging. But then his face brightens up again.
"Guess what?" He asks me. He has his elbows are close to his body and his knees are bent like they are when he's excited.
"What, what?" I ask jumpin' up and down. The tension is killing me.
"The Dib-sister said that she likes my orange uniform!" he says. "She noticed! And then she punched me in the face, but... She noticed!"
Master starts to dance and make squeaky noises, but then he opens his eyes and sees me in his invader tunic. He stops dancing and straightens up. Uh oh. He looks kind of angry.
"Gir, where did you get that?" He asks me. I hunch me shoulders.
"I wanna be just like you when I grow up." I tell him.
"I know you do, Gir. Everyone wants to be just like Zim. But don't touch my stuff, okay?"
Master turns around to go into his lair, but then he sees all the decorating I did, and he gets all stiff.
"Gir... what were you doing while I was out?" His voice is all calm and quiet like it is before he starts yelling.
Oh, I am in sooo much trouble...
"I was playing... Trading Spaces..." I mumble. I think my antenna is drooping.
Master turns around and growls at me. His face is all wrinkled and I can see his teeth really well. They are pointy and scary like the end of a spork.
But then he unwrinkles his face and takes a deep breath. I am really, really thankfull to the Dib-sister for putting my master in a good mood. Maybe I'll drop by her house and give her a hug later.
"Gir," Master says "You are going to scrape all of these uniforms of of the wall. Then you are going to wash them, and then you are going to mend them. Do you understand?"
"Good. I'm going to my sleeping quarters to take a nap. Don't disturb me."
Master crawls into the trashcan, and the computer lowers him until I can't see him anymore.
I hope master has a good nap. I know a movie he likes, and if he calms down enough, he might let me get in my doggie costume and lie on his lap. I hope he pets me.
Oh! I almost forgot you were still here! Sorry! I think you should go. Master is really cranky right now, and if he sees you...
"GIR, WHAT HAPPENED TO MY DOOR!" I hear master scream.
A.N.- I actually think I like this chapter better than the first one ^^! I'll write another chapter if I get reviews from five different authors. I already have an idea in mind! ^^
So if you love Gir, you will review.