Oh my dear sister...you should have never told me you liked PruCan...now you have to live with this abomination on your conscience.

I don't own Hetalia, you can all be grateful for that.


Prologue: Meeting the Family

Gilbert checked himself over in the mirror. He looked great, as usual, with his hair neatly arranged and in semi-formal attire, slacks and a polo shirt. Normally he would wear whatever the hell he wanted, but then, most of his dates did not start with formally meeting the family. Family seemed important to Matthew, so of course Gilbert did not want to look like a complete asshole and act like meeting Matthew's family meant nothing to him. He wanted to show that he did in fact give a damn and wanted to put effort into this potential relationship.

Gilbert looked at the corner of the mirror where a couple of pictures of Matthew had been tacked. He wanted to get some new ones. Gilbert, unlike his Hungarian friend, was not a stalker. All of his photos of Matthew had been cut out of group photos of nations in the past, back when he had not really taken notice of the Canadian. The personification of Prussia smiled as he thought back to their first meeting. Not their actual first meeting, Gilbert could not even remember whenever the hell that was, but he remembered the meeting where he had discovered he was in love. He had gotten drunk off his ass at a sleazy bar after a meeting and Matthew had stayed with him, all night, making sure he did not choke on his own vomit. After Gilbert had gotten over the hangover and confusion, it was love at first sight. After that fateful encounter, Gilbert put a little extra effort into looking out for the Canadian wallflower at meetings, 'accidentally' running into him and things like that. When Matthew finally got the nerve to engage Gilbert in a conversation that went beyond, 'Oh, hello again, how are you?' the two finally hit it off.

The albino looked at the latest picture he had tacked up. It was a photo that Matthew had given him to study before he met the family. Matthew had a very large extended family on both sides, with England of course having that huge commonwealth and France being a former imperialist power. On the English side, there were his aunt Ireland and his uncles Wales, Scotland, and Northern Ireland. The last one always unsettled Gilbert a little, imagining what it would be like to call a younger nation 'uncle.' Matthew also had a shit load of cousins. Gilbert remembered wondering how his eyes had not popped out of his head when he had first seen the picture. Antigua and Barbuda, Australia, Bahamas, Bangladesh, Barbados, Belize, Botswana, Brunei, Cameroon, Cyprus, Dominica, Gambia, Ghana, Grenada, Guyana, India, Jamaica, Kenya, Kiribati, Lesotho, Malawi, Malaysia, Maldives, Malta, Mauritius, Mozambique, Namibia, Nauru, New Zealand, Nigeria, Pakistan, Papua New Guinea, Rwanda, Saint Kitts and Nevis, Saint Lucia, Saint Vincent and the Grenadines, Samoa, Seychelles, Sierra Leone, Singapore, Solomon Islands, South Africa, Sri Lanka, Swaziland, Tanzania, Tonga, Trinidad and Tobago, Tuvalu, Uganda, Vanuatu and Zambia. Not to mention his brother America. Matthew also mentioned having another cousin, a colony of Scotland's who had passed away named Darien.

And then there was the French side, with France and Monaco of course. The Canadian also had a shit load of cousins on that side as well. There was Haiti, Dominican Republic, Algeria, Tunisia, Morocco, Mauritania, Mali, Senegal, Guiana, Niger, Chad, Burkina Faso, Ivory Coast, Gabon, Benin, Togo, Central African Republic, Djibouti, Madagascar, Comoros, French Southern and Antarctic Lands, Syria, Lebanon, Cambodia, Laos, Vietnam, Wallis and Futuna, and Libya. Just looking at the picture with the entire family crammed in tightly together made Gilbert's head spin. No wonder people forgot about Matthew. With such an enormous family, from literally all over the world, with all kinds of problems, it was no wonder the poor Canadian tended to get forgotten.

Thankfully though, Gilbert would not have to remember all of them…at least this visit. No, this visit was just a gathering of the Canadian's 'closest' relatives. This of course meant it would still be huge, but at least he would not have to memorize the entire commonwealth. He had enough trouble remembering everyone with the damned picture right in front of him. No, this was just Matthew's parents, his uncles and aunts, and his brother, all gathering at England's house, aka Kirkland Manor.

"Ready to go yet Gil?" asked Matthew, his voice drifting down the hall.

"Yeah, just cleaning up so I can look pretty for your parents," teased Gilbert, checking his hair one last time. It was, as always, awesome. So were his nails, teeth, skin, clothes…all were nothing short of awesome. Gilbert winked at himself in the mirror, gave the picture of the enormous family one last look before turning off the bathroom light and heading to the kitchen. "Sorry to keep you waiting Birdie. So, think mom and dad will approve of my awesome?"

Matthew, the gentle Canadian and ultimate wallflower looked him over and bit his lip. Gilbert sighed and took Matthew's hands in his own, "Come on, whatever it is, you'd better say it now so I don't make an ass of myself later, right?"

"It's just…well…you dressed up," said Matthew.

"Of course I dressed up! I mean, I like you Mattie, I want to make a good impression. Sure I've met them before, but not like this. I want to show them I'm willing to go the extra mile for you," explained Gilbert, "Or…are they not really going to care of notice?"

"Well, England might," admitted Matthew, "France definitely will notice what you wear, and maybe Scotland. But, uh, see, my family can be a bit…rough…and we sometimes play some pretty rough games when we get together. I just don't want to see you ruin your outfit."

Gilbert laughed, "Oh Birdie, I don't give a damn what happens to these clothes. And if it gets me in England and France's good books, then I'll wear anything. Come on, you have to admit I can make anything look good!"

Matthew giggled a little, "I don't know…can you rock a tutu?"

"Indeed I could," grinned Gilbert, "Now, let's get going.

"Are you sure?" asked Matthew, "This will be your last chance to change clothes."

"Yeah, it's no big deal. These belong to West anyways."


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