Warning: Silliness, slash undertones if you choose to see it. Set in random time/place where Tara's alive and Spike has a soul.
Start 'Em Young
"You know what!"
"I don't, or I wouldn't ask."
"You gave the baby a mohawk! You can't give Willow's baby a mohawk, she'll kill me! Kill me dead! And you may think that Tara's all sweet and nice, but she is devious, I tell you, devious! If she sees her baby with a mohawk and a black t-shirt saying 'Bite Me,' she will be so very not-happy, let me tell you," Xander said. He was glaring at Spike, who was glaring back. Spike's glare was somewhat less effective, considering he was holding an adorable baby in his arms. An adorable baby wearing a black onesie with red lettering, and a carefully styled mohawk on its head.
"Oi! I didn't give Junior here a mohawk, Dawn did, so don't you go bitching at me for that. And the t-shirt is a mercy gift. Red and Glinda are fine mums, but someone has to teach this nibblet how not to be a geek, unless you want to see 'em get thrashed at school. Better to start 'em young, yeah?" Spike said. He grinned down at the baby, who giggled up at him. Xander rolled his eyes.
"Yeah, well, you'll be explaining that to the happy moms," Xander said.
"Alright," Spike said smugly. Xander looked at him suspiciously, and Spike grinned. "I've got backup. Dawn and Buffy agree with me. They were right horrified when they saw that cow costume the witches put Junior in. 'Sides, Dawn thinks I'm cool."
Xander just shook his head mournfully.
"I'm leaving before the wrath of Willow falls upon ye," he said, and left the room. Spike just smirked and tickled the baby's tummy. She yawned and snuggled deeper into the vampire's arms. Spike glanced around, making sure no one was around to see, then smiled softly down at her.
"Tired, luv?" he asked. He started singing a soft lullaby as the baby's eyes drooped closed.
"Spike! You can't sing Sex Pistols songs to the baby!" Xander called from the next room. Spike rolled his eyes and kept singing.