Title: Today on the Discovery Channel
Rating: PG 13
Disclaimer: I own none, all belong to Joss Whedon
Comments: Always welcomed!
Summary: Spike's never seen a Rhinoceros
Warnings/Spoilers: Post Season 7
Beta'd by: Whichclothes
Prompt #243 from tamingthemuse- Rhinoceros
"Spike, what are you watching?" Xander asked as he walked into their room.
It had been three years since Sunnydale was destroyed and they moved to England to help new slayers control their powers. Spike had joined them less than two years ago after defeating Wolfram and Hart, saying that he wanted to help but he was tired of being ordered about. He had demanded a group of slayers that he could train himself. They came to an agreement that he could have his own slayers but Xander would be his liaison. After working together for a few months the two quickly went from comrades to friends to lovers.
"The Discovery Channel; today they are discussing Rhinoceroses. Did you know that female rhinos are pregnant for sixteen months?" Spike asked after kissing Xander hello.
"I didn't know that," Xander commented as he plopped down beside Spike. "I saw one give birth before though."
Spike's eyes went wide with wonder. "You did? What was it like?"
Xander's face scrunched up. "It was weird and kind of gross. I mean how do babies come from… there?"
"I don't know, pet. Just be thankful that it's not men that give birth. Could you imagine a ten pounder coming from your cock?" Spike shuddered.
"Eek! If I wasn't gay already I'd seriously be thinking about converting right about now!" Xander stated as he crossed his legs.
They turned their attention back to the television. The watched as a white rhino grazed, feeding on grasses. "I've never seen a rhino, except on TV," Spike told Xander.
Xander in turn looked absolutely shocked. "You're a hundred and thirty years old and you've never seen a rhinoceros up close and personal?"
"Well I wasn't really interested in wildlife was I? All I cared about was killing, torture and mayhem before the soul," Spike explained with a huff.
"You know you could always go to Africa. We could always go to Africa," Xander threw out. "I spent a fair amount of time there. It would be kind of nice to go back and actually appreciate the scenery this time around."
Spike raised his eyebrow. "What about the slayers and our duties?"
Xander shrugged. "I'm sure Buffy or Faith wouldn't mind taking on some extra slayers for a couple weeks. Buffy's been pestering us to see how the girls have been doing anyway."
"We wouldn't be able to do any sight-seeing until dark," Spike reminded him.
"So? I'm sure we could find something to occupy us during the day," Xander said, as he climbed onto Spike's lap.
Spike ran his hands over Xander's thighs. "Really?" he purred. "What kind of stuff?"
"Well we can do this," Xander whispered as he kissed Spike on the lips. "And this," He trailed kisses over Spike's cheek down to his neck.
Spike moaned. "I think we could do that in Africa."
"So you tell Buffy to look after the girls and I'll book the plane tickets and find us a hotel in Kenya. One with a pool!" Xander said excitedly. The council had a pool but having a bunch of teens ogling him and his lover every time they tried going for a dip was no fun.
Spike grinned. "Lovely idea, Xan." Xander jumped up, leaving Spike hot and horny, to find information for things they could do and hotels where they could stay. "Oi! That doesn't mean you have to do it right now," he whined as Xander ignored him. Spike turned back to the television only to find that two of the rhinos were mating. "That's not fair," he grumbled but continued to watch anyway. Well at least someone was getting some.