Final chapter, guise.
I remembered seeing Gaycheese pull N up from the darkness of the collapsing castle. When I watched N plunge down into the shadows of the castle, I felt as if he had been gripping my heart when he fell, tearing it from my chest. It was tortuous, flying above the castle and watch it fall, knowing N would be but a memory, lost in the rubble. I had been shocked to see my hydreigon fly in out of nowhere. Apparently he had managed to follow us, and when I had told him N had fallen, he didn't hesitate to flying into the obis of falling stone and shadows. After the nerve wracking moments following, he had flown out in just the nick of time, holding an unconscious N. N had suffered many injuries from the falling stones, being battered and bashed several times. Fresh wounds had cut into his body, fresh blood trickling from the cuts and marks. His clothes were torn to shreds, stained with the crimson liquid. It was a horrifying sight, especially when he was barely breathing, and wasn't even awake anymore. I recalled screaming for my pokemon to rush N to the hospital ahead of Zekrom, Reshiram and I, which he did. I blacked out soon after that, waking up the next day in the hospital.
"N! Where is he!" I had cried frantically to the nurses. When they didn't answer, my patience was gone and I took it upon myself to find him. Only when I had left the hospital bed I had doubled over in pain. I had found out later that I had intense external and internal bruising. Aside from that and some wounds and burns I had been relatively fine, especially compared to N. When I had asked about his condition, they were blunt. Unstable, could be unconscious for weeks, months, possibly not even wake up at all. I had gone into a complete panic after they told me.
Getting around in a wheelchair certainly wasn't easy, but it came in handy when I had sat next to N's bed. I rarely left, not even when the nurses told me. They had to wheel me out and back to my room. Of course, this was only after I had spent three days bed ridden. When I heard N had woken up (during one of the only times I was away from his bed) I had no idea what to think. I had spent all that time thinking about what happened to me, what happened to him, all that had been said. I was like some old man contemplating life and death. So when I had seen him, eyes open, I just said the first thing on my mind, and then launched myself across the room to his body.
After he had awoken, I slowly began to realize how drastically he had changed. He seemed so hollow. He had forgotten much of his past. Anything relating to Ghetsis had been blocked; everything else was fuzzy, so he and the nurses explained. He seemed to remember me, at the same time, not. He knew who I was, he knew my pokemon, but he hadn't questioned our relationship at all. This worried me, it was like how it was years ago, friends but with a gap carved between us.
Right now, we were connected though. Our hands had been intertwined the entire car ride back to Nuvema Town. I still wondered what would happen between us now. What in general would happen? Our apartment was ruined; I was fired from my job. At times I considered just going back to being a trainer. But N wouldn't approve. It was all lost at the moment. There was only one thing I was sure of, our hands were together. It seemed to give me, if only, a slight amount of comfort.
"Welcome home, boys." My mom spoke up as she twisted the car into the driveway, nearly running into the side of the house.
I got out of the car, attempting not to limp around to the other side of help N out. He still couldn't work a crutch properly so he had a difficult time making his way to the door. Once inside the house, he obliged himself to the couch. I looked around the living room, it brought up a nostalgic feeling of childhood.
"You guys must be starving! Eating only hospital food, pshhhawww. You both need a good, warm cooked meal." My mom sang as she strutted into the house. She whipped out her phone, "Hello? Arcanine Chinese restaurant and speedy delivery?..." I blocked out the rest of the conversation as I pulled out my pokeballs and let my pokemon out before sitting down on the couch next to N.
It was an awkward wait for dinner to arrive. I still didn't know what to say to N about anything anymore. He always was so vague and glassy these last few days, everything out of his mouth was that of confusion. Eventually we were joined by my Mom and her boyfriend. She kept blabbering on about everything- I was reminded instantly of White or Bianca. Food soon arrived, and we gathered around the table to eat. N was quietly polite, and ate next to nothing. My Mom urged him to eat more, but most of the food served was meat based and N was a vegetarian.
"So, there's an inflatable twin mattress in the closet, one of you can use it while the other can use the couch. Since your bed was burned up in the apartment fire." My mom explained as she picked up our empty plates. "Unless you two can fit onto one twin mattress…~"
"Mom… if we had an extra mattress all this time, why didn't N use it when he first arrived?" I pointly asked, remembering how my Mom had insisted N got to sleep in my bed when he first arrived injured and abused on my doorstep.
"Oh… haha, I guess I forgot." She laughed nervously as she put the dishes in the wash.
I smiled slightly, "Of course you did Mom." I told her sarcastically.
N didn't say anything, just struggled up from the table, thanked my Mother for the meal and limped out of the room. I watched him go with a frown on my face. I felt a hand on my shoulder as I looked up to see my mom there. "Ah… Black, you've grown so much since I last spoke to you."
"It's only been a few months, Mom." I replied with faint amusement.
"No, since I last talked to you on the phone. Which was only a few days before the incident right?"
I remembered now- I called her when I was feeling bummed about N. I didn't bring him up, but I had a sneaking suspicion she knew what I was upset about. "If I remember right." I replied. My Mom didn't know the details about my incident. I don't know if I could even face her if she knew I had been raped by N's father. I shuddered at the memory and pushed it from my mind. The only thing keeping me from mentally breaking down was keeping in mind N went through the same thing- only as a child.
"You and that boy have been through a lot. Take a few days to rest up, okay? In the meantime, maybe you two could talk." My mother went on.
"Wait, what do you mean?" I shot her a look, and she laughed.
"Black, hun, you two haven't said a word to each other the entire time you've been here. I know you two are closer than that. After you returned from your journey years ago, most of the things out of your mouth had been about N. You've been living with him, when I had called you; you always brought up N at some point in the conversation. I've been around love a long time; I know the signs. You don't need to hide it just because you're ashamed."
"Ashamed? Of what? I'm not ashamed! I have no idea what-"
"Black, you realize you just raised your voice at me? That's the first time you haven't mumbled since you woke up in the hospital." My Mom pointed out soothingly.
"I-" I tried to retort but I realized it was true.
She smiled at me and walked out of the kitchen. After a moment of thinking about what she said, I got up as well.
It was late, so I found the inflatable mattress she spoke of and pumped it up. I put it in my room and covered it with extra sheets and an extra pillow. It didn't look very comfortable, but it was better than the hospital beds or a stone floor. As I peeled off my cloths so I only wore my boxers, I crawled under the sheets and laid on the bouncy air filled mattress. I only remembered now I didn't say goodnight to N, but it was too late for that. I drifted off into sleep moments after my head hit the pillow.
I woke up not long later rather violently. My head flung off the pillow and my body rolled off the mattress. My body was covered with a thick layer of sweat, and my heartbeat pounded in my ribcage. I was yet another nightmare… I had been having them every night lately. It was nothing surprising; it was just everything that happened with Ghetsis replayed over and over. It got worse every night. I could practically feel his mega cock up my ass, which wasn't anything pretty or pleasing. Slowly, I managed to get to my feet, my breath still coming out in heavy pants. I wasn't sure how long this nightmare thing was going to last.
There was a knock on my door, which sent my heartbeat racing several times faster in a flash of fear before I heard N's voice. He creaked open the door, limping into my room. "Black..?"
I didn't turn to see him, I didn't want him to know how panicked I was. "Uhm, yeah, N?"
There was a long silence before he replied. "I cannot sleep… Can I stay with you tonight?"
I couldn't exactly deny him now could I? "Sure, N. it'll be a tight fit though-"
"Oh my… Black what is that mark on your back?" I heard him almost shout in panic.
"The mark on my…?" I questioned, and then I remembered. I had an array of fingernail scratches and bite marks on my back. I could still feel his teeth marking my skin. I whipped around so N couldn't look closely at them and have it bring up unpleasant blocked memories. I recalled what the nurse had told me: not to allow N to remember anything while he was still physically healing, it would be very unhealthy to remember such a traumatizing event. "They're just, um, scratches."
N looked down at my chest, and then I remembered they were there too. Fingernail markings and scruff marks. "Black… This happened in one of those repressed memories the nurse lady told me about?" He asked, limping closer.
"Yeah… try not to think about it though." I added hastily.
"…I have similar marks on my body… Did… Did whatever made those marks on your body happen to me?" N asked, putting a hand to his chest to where I assumed would be a scar.
"I… uh… Yes." I finally sighed.
"Black, do they hurt?"
"…Not as much as they did."
There was a long pause before N lifted an arm and touched one of the healing scars on my chest, if I wasn't distracted by how saddened N's face was I would have shuddered, "…Black, is it my fault this happened to you..?"
A long silence followed this before I sighed heavily, taking his hand in mine, "No, it's not. And don't ever think it's your fault either. It's not."
A few moments later of –awkwardly- standing there, I helped him to the mattress. Once again it was awkward to try and maneuver two fully grown people on a mattress. Especially considering one had a broken foot. Once he managed to fit on it, our bodies ended up fitting together like puzzle pieces. Facing each other, and the only way we could fit our arms was to wrap them around the other's body. It was the first time I had had such close contact with N for nearly… a month? And admittedly I missed it. N didn't seem all that comfortable though, when I looked up at his face it was twisted with confusion.
"N, what exactly do you remember of us?" I askedmy voice muffled from my face buried in his shirt.
"I am not sure… It's spotty. The feeling of paranoia and fear takes up a lot of my memories. I remember how I was always comfortable around you though. A true, trusting and loving feeling, I could always be relaxed around you… until… until I ask you something… but I cannot remember exactly what it was…" He trailed away, trying to think.
I swallowed; I remembered the question as clear as day. "You asked if I loved you." I mumbled finally.
Silence followed once again.
"…It is alright, Black. I am still unsure of what it means to humans…" N replied after the lengthy quietness.
"I can't be sure N. Everything is confusing right now." I sighed. It was the truth too. Everything that had been happening recently was just piling the stress.
"Like I said Black, it is okay."
"Well, N, you know what it means to be in a relationship, right?" I asked slowly.
N thought for a moment. "That is like being mates, right?"
"I guess you could call it that. Would you want to be in one of those relationships with me, N?"
"…Black, mates are forever though. Two beings are either mates forever, or only mates to… well… mate, then leave."
I nearly choked on nothing in particular at the word mate. "Well, this is a different kind of… mate if you want to call it that. Being forever mates for humans is like… hrm, getting married."
"Oh, I knew that…" There was another lengthy silence. I could feel N's fingers fiddling with each other awkwardly as he thought.
"..Listen N, I want to help you. You realize the position you're in? You don't remember much of anything about the past regarding… Well, something. Anything from the last several months is patchy memories filled with fear and paranoia. N, I want to help you forget all about that fucked up shit." I pulled away and propped myself up on an elbow so I could look clearly at him, "If we're going to be in a relationship, you need to learn about the human world once again. Even if I have the re-teach you what you've forgotten, and have you learn new things."
N blinked, appearing surprised, "You would do that? All of that? I feel like I have been a burden on your enough. I get the feeling I have; I remember thinking it before…"
"N, you are not a burden. You never were."
Before he could continue I thought fast, and rather recklessly as my lips connected with his. For the first time in nearly a month I kissed N again, and oh how I missed his lips. It pleased me more when he didn't back off, but that was probably because I took him by surprise. I didn't let it last very long before I pulled away, leaving him looking more confused than ever.
"You're not a burden. I will help you, as far as my life goes right now, you are among my top priorities." I paused, "I guess I never realized before how much of a big part of my life you are. It was one of the things I thought about when you were still asleep in the hospital."
"Am... am I really? I… I remember feeling very alone in my past. But you were always there…"
"N, this is going to sound cheesy and corny. But… I won't let you feel alone anymore." I knew how N felt as a child, in pain, and helpless. Alone, even though a friend was near. Knowing this it was easier for me to understand him, to know what to say and what to do for him now. "I know how horrible you must feel, even if you don't remember any details. You remember the feelings you felt right? Loneliness, fear, paranoia. I won't let you feel those anymore." Oh there I went sounding cheesy again, but I was very truthful about it.
N watched with careful eyes, "Never… feel it again?" He repeated, "Because I feel it now. I don't want to feel it… Nor do I want to remember what caused it."
I thought for a moment before inching forward, this time letting him realize what was happening before I kissed him again, deeper than the previous kiss. The soft flesh against mine felt so comforting and reassuring, and just plain pleasurable. After a moment of the delicate contact his head fell back onto the pillow, I followed his lips eagerly, causing part of my body to be above his in an awkward manner. I appreciated he managed to kiss back, I was worried I'd have to teach him how to kiss again. The kiss deepened a bit, though tongues weren't added, I felt his daring hand in my hair though, keeping me from moving away. I thought it was sort of endearing. My need to touch his body after so long was overbearing, but I didn't move my hands any closer to his body, I didn't want this to get carried away. It might trigger a negative memory.
Finally I pulled away, slightly panting, "Do you remember?"
"…R-remember what?" N looked a little dazed from the kiss.
I smiled a bit, "Never mind." I laid my head slowly back onto the pillow and wrapped my arms around his body once more. I felt like a child clinging to a plushie the way I hugged N, my face digging onto his neck. I wasn't sure he felt about it though, I wondered if he remembered any of the contact between us other then the feelings he'd felt when we did.
My eyes were closed and I was in deep thought when I felt a hand on my chest. "W-what are you doing?" I pulled away from my rather comfortable spot.
"…Are you sure these weren't my fault." He was referring to the scars again.
"Like I said before. I promise they aren't…"
N struggled up into a sitting position, wincing as he shifted his leg before he lifted his shirt up and pointed at the almost identical looking scars going across his torso. They were long-ago healed, but they were almost the same as mine. "And the ones on my shoulder and back that looks as if something bit into the flesh…" He then scowled. "They look sort of ugly." He sighed disapprovingly.
"I think they're beautiful scars." I said plainly, getting up into a sitting position and wrapping my arms around his torso. "I promise it wasn't your fault. Never was, never will. Quit blaming yourself." /Oh look, Black, you're back to the cheesy./ My voice was a quiet whisper because I was aware N's shirt was still up and our chests were touching now. "Believe me, N." I sighed into his ear.
"O-okay…" N replied quietly."But Black..?"
"Why are you quivering?" He asked innocently. Well N, it's because our bear torsos are touching and I'm beginning to remember I had a sex drive, I replied in my head.
"No reason." I told him, finally moving away to find him yawning widely.
"Let's get some sleep, N."
He nodded, lying back down in the pillows. "My dreams have been confusing…"
"…Maybe they'll go away tonight." I can only hope mine will too.
Our bodies once again fit together, and N was out like a light. I remained awake for while longer, listening to him sleep. I thought about what this meant for us, what it meant for my future. Perhaps now N could start living a normal life (normal for him anyway) and as could I. Without the Shadow Triad or Ghetsis stalking him anymore, and now that he's forgotten… A life could be lived normally, right?
Thinking about this, I buried my face into his chest, inhaling the familiar scent I never realized I recognized.
N… Meeting you was fate. Becoming your friend was a choice, but falling in love with you I had no control over…
~Sort of important A/N~
"Meeting you was fate. Becoming your friend was a choice, but falling in love with you I had no control over…" I don't own this quote but shit I have no idea who the hell made it
How many of you when you saw this was the last chapter freak out and sob over your keyboards?
Also, sorry, I had to mention Ghetsis' mega cock one more time. I blame the thread on /vp/ and anonymous reviewer. Dear jesus, this chapter took so long to write, I had to try so hard not to make them more OOC then they already were, and then self edit and asdfghjkl; BUT I GOT IT DONEEE.
Anyway, I just want to say thank you to all of my faithful readers, followers and commenters. I wasn't sure how this fic would turn out, I had no idea it would end up as successful as it did. You guys are amazing, fer cereals.
Finally, I'd like to say, there will be a one will have lemons because I promised lemons in this one but I couldn't fit any in... Without it being, well, OOT, unnatural and weird. Anyway, the sequel is still being planned but I will begin writing it when school starts. (Nothing like spending time writing Isshushipping instead of doing homework, fufufu watch me fail Junior year because of these isshushipping fics.)It will be uploaded to my account and dA account.
For those of you interested,I have been looking forward to starting my next Isshushipping fic called Days. I've been working on it off and on on the sidelines of BS, and I was going to upload it on , not sure if I should on dA though. But we'll see...
Thanks again my readers, I'm glad you enjoyed this fanfiction.~ D Now... Time to plot my Isshushipping fics and watch ao no exorcist kekekeee