Title: The Lucky Jerk

By: AtobeLover

Summary: Ryoma's in love, and the Seigaku team won't rest until they find out the identity of the lucky jerk… and in the process, Ryoma's paired with almost everyone on the Seigaku team except the real guy, who isn't even on it.

Rated: T

Disclaimer: I don't own Prince of Tennis.

A/N: This story is complete. And because of stupid Error Type 2 (which sounds like computerized diabetes, anyway) I might not be able to edit the properties and click on the Complete option instead of the In-Progress one. COMPLETE! So I shouldn't get "Please update soon" comments after I post this. Thanks. xD Sorry if I come off as rude, it's just how I am, even though I don't mean a single word of it. Mwaah.


There have been so many pairs in this story, like... honestly. Feeble attempt at it, though.

Thanks so much for reading. It meant a lot to see those reviews, and I'd do anything if you'd review again. Just let me know what you think about this, and stuff.

Everyone froze with a look of terror on their face. What was Ryoma doing here? Who the fuck told Ryoma that the regulars were meeting here today? Some people glanced at Momoshiro and gave him the evil-eye.

'No, seriously.' Ryoma stepped in and closed the door behind him with an air of finality. The others gulped. 'Who the fuck organized this? Trying to find my boyfriend, are you?'

No one answered. The aura of murder that Ryoma was radiating was keeping their mouths shut.

'Well, I suppose that yes; you wanted to know who my boyfriend is.' Ryoma straightened his cap. 'Well, guess what, I will not be telling you. Fuck off. Mada mada dane. Serves you right for poking your noses into my business.'

Then he noticed the notebook in Eiji's hands. 'Gimme that.'

Eiji meekly handed it over.

'Okay, list of probable boyfriends...' Ryoma muttered, flipping through the notebook. 'This is Inui-senpai's notebook, right? OH.' He had come to the last page.

'What the fuck? I'm supposed to be with ... Fuji-senpai, my best friend, in a threesome with Buchou and... Inui-senpai? And—' he faltered. 'Who thought it was Horio?'

'Eiji did,' Momo supplied helpfully.

Ryoma glared at Eiji, who shrank back and hugged Oishi tightly. When Ryoma looked away, Eiji once again shot Momo the evil-eye, sticking his tongue out for good effect.

'Okay. I'm keeping this with me. I'm talking to Horio tomorrow, just you see. I'm not telling you...' Ryoma smiled a sadistic smile worthy of Fuji...

...and turned and left without a backward glance, leaving the regulars dying to know who had taken their resident brat for themselves.

'Let me go over and clear this up! You're MINE!' Atobe practically yelled.

'They even had me in a threesome,' Ryoma smirked, enjoying the way he was winding Atobe up. He leisurely leaned back on Atobe's bed while the owner of said bed was walking around in a blazing fury.

Atobe was virtually growling. 'The only threesome you'll be in is with ore-sama and his reflection,' he said. 'Tell them you're MINE!'

Ryoma quite liked this jealous and possessive side of Atobe.

'I can't.'

'Why not?'

'I won't tell them, of course!'

'Why not?'

'I've had a strange wish to become a sadist.'

Atobe raised an eyebrow. Ryoma said, 'Forget it. I've got an idea. Nothing to concern you with.'

Atobe let it go. Kissing Ryoma was much better than getting jealous over him.

He got into the bed next to Ryoma. Gave him a soft kiss first, and then said, 'I love you, okay?'

'Yeah, Monkey King.'

Who gave him those hickeys?

Momo couldn't stop staring at those marks on Ryoma's neck, shoulder, stomach and thigh. Neither could Eiji. Staring at him in horror, they looked at each other once. They HAD to know who it was. Pride gone to hell, they were stalking him now.

Practice went by as usual.

Until Horio entered and Ryoma saw. He took the small book out from his pocket and approached him. 'Hey, Horio.'

Horio looked up. 'Echizen-kun. Tennis tips? I have two years—'

'Are you my boyfriend?' Ryoma asked loudly.

The whole tennis club went silent. Eiji was gawking at them.

Horio looked stunned. 'NO WAY IN HELL! I AM NOT YOUR—'

They heard a scream from somewhere. And Horio turned around to see a furious Tomoka stalking over to them.

'I HATE YOU! YOU SAID YOU LOVED ME, BUT YOU'RE GAY FOR RYOMA! I AGREE HE'S ABSOLUTELY DELECTABLE, BUT STILL!' Tomoka shrieked at Horio. Ryoma looked on, amused, albeit a bit disturbed about the "delectable" comment.

'No, Tomoka, it's a misunderstanding, I love you, you're the one for me, who cares if he's delectable... I want to have two years... or more with you, Tomo... TOMOKA!' As Tomoka walked away with her head in the air and a bemused Sakuno beside her, Horio turned to Ryoma. 'Echizen-kun! Help me out, please!'

Ryoma shrugged. 'I'll see what I can do.' As Horio ran after Tomoka, Ryoma turned and left, throwing the book back to Inui, who caught it and opened it to start writing something. The notebook had been of no use. Only four words had sparked the reaction which proved that no, Ryoma wasn't with Horio.

He went over to Eiji. 'Okay, senpai? He's not my boyfriend.'

'O-CHIBI!' Eiji wailed, glomping Ryoma. 'Tell me, mou, who your koi is!'

'Nope. Mada mada dane,' Ryoma said, smirking. Tezuka tapped Eiji on the shoulder. 'Stop crying, Kikumaru.'

'Yes, Buchou.' Eiji sniffed and got off Ryoma. 'And Echizen, twenty laps for disrupting practice.'

Echizen started running with a wide smirk on his face.

The next day went by normally. School ended. Hyotei had come over for practice, and Tezuka was talking to Atobe, who had a sly grin on his face for some reason Tezuka couldn't figure out.

'I shall be playing Echizen, of course.'

'Fine, Atobe.' The addressee signaled Shishido to go over to Kikumaru, and took his place in front of Ryoma. 'Brat.'

'Monkey King,' Ryoma said with a hidden smile that Atobe perceived too easily. He smiled back.

Atobe served.

And their match began.

The intensity of the match made everyone pause in their respective matches... and drew them to this game like moths to a flame. Awed by the passion with which they played, the others just gathered around... and watched, dumbstruck by the level of skill.

It ended with Atobe the winner, seven games to five.

He sank to his knees, dead tired. The match had drawn out longer than he'd expected, and Ryoma had played much better than he'd expected. He tried to get up, but as he looked up, all senses left him. Ryoma was slowly walking toward him, and something about the way he sauntered toward him was making Atobe's muscles go numb.

'Hey, Atobe.' Ryoma raised a hand and took his cap off, dropping it beside him. Ryoma's shadow covered Atobe as he mutely gazed upwards. Ryoma smiled his smile; the smile meant for only Atobe that left him dazed sometimes.

'Good match,' Ryoma said.

Atobe nodded. 'You are no match for ore-sama, after all.'

'Mada mada dane,' Ryoma smirked, and then swooped down to kiss him.

Tezuka was observing the match like everyone else. Ryoma had tired Atobe, but had lost; something he hadn't expected. But then Ryoma went over to Atobe and they exchanged a few casual words and then...

Tezuka took off his glasses and wiped them with the corner of his T-shirt. He put them on again.

Okay, they were still kissing. So Tezuka wasn't hallucinating, and the screams and cries and gasps of shock he was hearing around him weren't a fabrication of his imagination after all.

'Are you going to break them up?' Fuji mumbled from beside him.

Tezuka was quiet. 'Should I?'

'No, not really.' Fuji took out his digital camera, and switched it on.

And Tezuka went inside the courts.

'It was ATOBE all along?' Momoshiro complained. 'And here we were, thinking it was someone amongst us...'

'Mada mada dane,' Ryoma said, and took a sip of his Ponta.

They were in Kawamura's dad's sushi place, and celebrating the win over Hyotei in their practice matches. Also celebrating the fact that they finally found Ryoma's secret koi. They managed to find reasons to celebrate all the time... even ridiculous reasons.

'I mean, come on, I'm better than him,' Momo criticized. Ryoma raised an eyebrow. He'd been acquiring Atobe's habits nowadays. 'Are you implying something, Momo?' He smirked.

Momo replayed what he'd said, and blushed violently. 'NO WAY! I told you before, An's my girlfriend!'

Kaidoh hissed from beside him.

Momo poked him. 'Mamushi, can I have your inarizushi?'

Mamush—Kaidoh silently handed it over. Momo looked at him, surprised. 'Is something wrong with you?'

'Shut up, peach. Fshuuuu…'

'Okay, he's all right.' Momo started eating.

Kaidoh shook his head in exasperation. Love was stupid.

Ryoma said, 'At least you guys won't be bugging me anymore.'

And then everything was back to normal for them. Well, as normal as it could be with a brat's narcissist boyfriend "dazzling" them with his presence every day, and other stuff.


Ryoma kissed Atobe slowly. Atobe kissed back, running a hand through Ryoma's ebony hair. The tennis magazine clutched in Ryoma's hand, made weird sounds as Ryoma moved away to say a few words of love:

'Look, Monkey King. Fuck off our practice, okay? The tournaments are coming closer, and you KNOW we're practicing harder, and now you're dropping in to fuck with our heads.'

'Ore-sama comes for you. And not to—as you put it so eloquently, fuck with your heads. Ore-sama does not appreciate mind tricks, much less use them on someone else.'

'Mada mada dane.' Ryoma touched Atobe's hand to hold it.

'Shut up, brat.' Atobe tightened his grip around Ryoma's hand.

'I won't, Monkey King.' Ryoma entwined his fingers with Atobe's.

'SHUT UP.' Atobe's thumb caressed the back of Ryoma's hand.

'I said I won't.' Ryoma turned and kissed the side of Atobe's neck.

'Fine. Don't. It's better if you don't shut up. Just, whatever you do, DON'T SHUT UP.' Atobe kissed the side of Ryoma's neck in return.

'Okay, fine, shutting up, jeez.' Ryoma frowned and went back to perusing his tennis magazine on top of Atobe's bed, and Atobe smirked. So much for not using psychological tricks.

WOW. This story is OVER. Can't believe it. Whatever. This story is complete, no matter what the site says. I mean, you all know about Error Type Two now, right? Using workarounds to post and all...

Please review! I'd love to know what you thought of this attempt at competent writing.