A AlanXEric Fluff that is nearly completely based upon the recent translation I found of one of the scenes in KuroMyu2
Soo... Yeah. XD Alan Humphries, Eric Slingby, and William T. Spears (C) Yana Toboso.
The Thorns of Death
Alan was laying in the Guest Bedroom of the Phantomhive mansion, staring up at the ceiling. Eric sat beside the bed, reading a book, their Death Scythes propped against the wall. It could have lasted like that forever, but Alan's mind was bursting. Eric knew now. The one thing that he had tried to keep hidden from his former Mentor, his Best Friend, and what he hoped one day to be his Future lover. Except for there was not Future for Alan. "Thorns of Death." he said, rolling over to get in a better position to get up.
"You're awake." Eric said, looking up from his book. Alan gave a brief affirmation. "You need anything?"
"No. I'm fine." Alan told him, a slight bit terse as he began to sit up.
"Water? Brandy? Just say the word, Alan." Eric told him.
"I said I'm fine!" Alan snapped, immediately regretting the harsh tone in his voice. Eric seemed unaffected by it, though, throwing his hands up in defeat and beginning to go back to his book.
"Whatever. I try to help you out, and I get yelled at." he mumbled, as Alan gave a weak laugh.
"A shinigami who controls life and death is now suffering from an incurable disease that would go into and snuff out his heart. The Thorns of Death..." Alan forced back tears at how ridiculous he must sound.
"Quit worrying about that nonsense. Just take a rest." Eric told him, book half-forgotten. 'If you only knew, Alan. You wouldn't have to worry.'
"A immortal god would would one day go to his death. Isn't it funny?" Alan's voice suddenly went soft, at the same moment challenging Eric to answer the question he had posed.
The hand that held his book tightened, as Eric tried not to show how 'funny' he thought it really was. "It's not funny at all." he said, tightly. 'Funny to know that the one person you love in this world is dieing? As if.'
"What? You don't think this is a joke?" Alan gave another laugh, getting the rest of the way out of his bed.
"Alan." Eric said, not yet leaving the chair. He didn't want to have to hear Alan talk like this. Didn't want to have to live with knowing that there was something that could be done to help Alan that Eric knew Alan would not accept.
"How long do you think it will take... for the Thorns to reach my heart?" Alan nearly spat the question at him.
"Alan." Eric said, raising his voice an octave higher than before. He didn't want to have to see Alan weak like this. Not when he knew how strong Alan was. How strong he had been when they had been Mentor and Apprentice, rather than Coworkers.
"A Month?" Alan continued, oblivious to Eric's voice for the moment. "A week? Three days?" a single tear fell from his eye. "There's no way for me to know, Eric. I could die tomorrow."
Eric stood from his seat, towering over Alan who was sitting on the bed. "The case of the uncollected souls has probably tired you out. Just sleep tight tonight, please." Even as he requested it, Alan was jumping off the bed.
"Death is too scary." Alan said, the remark coming out of nowhere, silencing Eric for the time being. "It's painful, Unbearable. As if my heart was tearing itself apart." he was nearly yelling at this point, before his voice dropped to little more than a whisper. "It makes me feel so... lonely." hanging his head, he stood perfectly still.
Eric dashed the rest of the way around the bed, impulsively holding the brunette in his arms, whispering Alan's name softly in his ear.
"When I was collecting souls, facing the dying, I always thought, wouldn't it be better if I could share even a tiny bit of their pain?" Alan looking up to meet Eric's eyes, continuing before Eric could get a word in. "But... I finally understood after I ended up like this. Sharing their pain? It was a pure lie!" he gave a half-broken sob, leaning into Eric's chest in a rare moment of complete weakness. His voice dropped to a whisper again. "I think it's a good thing that I have this illness."
Eric's face grew stony. 'A good thing? It's a good thing that you're ripping yourself away from me, Alan?" he wondered, not finding the courage to say his thoughts aloud. Pulling away from Alan he paced to the other side of the room.
"For those waiting for their Final Day, even I couldn't share their feelings..." Alan mused. "But I can at least lean closer to them by now." Sitting down on the bed, he decided to start a different topic, for Eric's sake.
"You know the stars in the sky?" he asked, looking out of the picturesque window to the night sky above them.
Eric turned back around. "Yeah. What about them?" he asked, smirking as he sat down beside Alan, his fingers grazing the brunette's on purpose.
"Alot of them are already dead... but because they're so far out in the sky, the light is still traveling into our eyes. It could already be dead, but the billions of people who see it would never know." Alan said, sighing. This topic change wasn't much of a change.
Eric smiled, "Well, some people obviously do. For one, there's a certain Know-It-All in this room who realizes it." he told Alan teasingly.
"I... I wonder if I'll be able to become someone's light once I'm gone." Alan mumbled.
He sighed. Still on that subject, then. "Hey, now. You are not going to "go" anywhere except for downstairs for breakfast in the morning, and after that we're getting straight out of here to report back to William."
"William... Will found me. Whatever Shinigami had made me into one abandoned me when I was born. I was all alone." Alan gave a small laugh, sliding his hand under Eric's, "It's sort of hard to believe that he's the closest thing I have to a father.
Eric sighed again, turning his had so that their palms interlocked, "Alan." he said, as a slight warning. He wasn't what he was warning Alan against, but he knew he should at least sound like he knew.
"I guess when the time comes I'll die all alone as well." Alan said, and Eric was stunned into silence. To say something like that so freely... It took him a moment to process that Alan was to the stage of full-out crying now, but he was too shocked to do anything about it. "I realize that that will be my fate..." Alan said, voice cracking at every turn. "But then... I can't understand... why I keep crying about it."
Eric couldn't take it any more. He loved Alan and he was not going to see his friend like this. He pulled Alan closer into him, kissing his lips tenderly until Alan's crying was replaced by nearly the same shocked expression that Eric had worn a moment earlier. "No more of that, now." Eric said, gently.
"I... love you, Eric." Alan whispered, leaning into the stronger man, fighting against the sleep that now wanted to take him under. "You've always looked out for me, even though I was forced upon you by Will, and even though you always act like you don't want anyone to get closer."
Now Eric just felt plain out embarrassed. "I..." he started, sighing. "I love you too, Alan. More than you may ever know. But..." Eric sighed. Why was he about to say this? "I can't be like you."
"Huh?" Alan blinked.
"When I was out, collecting souls, facing the dying, I didn't think like that. I didn't think about sharing their pain, or leaning closer to them. However, for you..." Eric kissed him on the cheek, lightly. "If there's ever anything I can do to lessen your pain, then I would do it in a heartbeat. If it would save you, I would share your pain."
"Eric?" Alan's eyes had widened to become abnormally large. "You... you shouldn't say things like that concerning something as useless as my life."
Eric scoffed, "Your life? Useless?" he smirked, "Where would I be without you as my light?" he asked. "Now quit thinking about this and go to bed. The sun'll be rising pretty soon. You should try to get in a few more hours before breakfast."
"Hm..." Alan seriously considered what Eric suggested now. "I'll go to sleep if you come to bed with me." he suggested. "Unless you think my light would keep you up." he teased.
Eric chuckled, "Alright, but don't think we're going to do anything in this Mansion. That would, I think, be better saved for one or the other of our apartments when we get back." Eric told his counterpart.
Alan nodded, starting the crawl back under the covers as Eric joined him. "Besides," Alan added, "Who knows how thin these walls might be? Someone might hear us."
Eric nodded, "Glad we're on the same page." he said, sighing, as he pulled the brunette closer to him. "Good night, Alan."
"I want to hear you say it again, Eric." Alan said, reducing his voice to a whisper.
"I don't want to wear it out."
Eric smirked, "I love you, Alan."
"I love you too, Eric. Good night."