Disclaimer: I don't own anything
Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous
Mr. Barkin stood in the middle of the gymnasium, delivering the message of the morning assembly to the Middleton High student population, "Listen up people! The time has arrived for you to vote in a new student government. Class president is position of honor, prestige, and great responsibility. The burden is only for those fit to rise to the challenge. Now do we have any nominations?"
Hope sat filing her nails quietly next to Naruto, who had fallen asleep stretched out next to her with a comic book covering his face. Kim sat on the other side of him with a bored expression. Like the rest of the students, they simply weren't paying much attention to the man.
"This is democracy people! Now do as I say!" bellowed Mr. Barkin. "Give me some nominations!"
Kim sighed before elbowing Naruto in the side to wake him up, but it was to no avail.
"I want a double order of miso..." mumbled Naruto in his sleep.
Hope shook her head before attempting a different approach by whispering something into the sleeping blond's ear.
"KIM POSSIBLE!" shouted Naruto as he jumped suddenly up. Everyone stared and snickered at the blond, whose eyes darted around the room in confusion, "Who? What? Where's the ramen?"
Rufus poked his head out his pocket rubbing the sleep out of his eyes, "Bah, no ramen." He quickly retreated back to his dreams of cheese flavored ramen noodles.
Kim sweat-dropped, "Don't tell me you told him to shout my name out to get free ramen..."
Hope shrugged and went back to filing her nails, "It worked didn't it?"
Bonnie gritted her teeth at the round of applause Kim got for her nomination, when suddenly an evil smirk crossed her face.
"I nominate Naruto Stoppable!" declared Bonnie.
"No just hold up a minute! I don't want to run for president!" exclaimed a panicking Naruto.
"He's not eligible to run either, too many detentions." informed Mr. Barkin.
Bonnie let out a huff of annoyance, "Fine then, I nominate Brick Flagg instead."
"What?" was the collective response of the rest of the students. Brick was a popular guy, but he was as dumb, as well... a brick.
Brick had been listening to music, and popped out his ear phone because he heard his name, "What?"
Barkin grinned, "Ah, how classic! The cheerleader versus the quarterback!"
Naruto let out a sigh of relief, "Phew! Dodged a bullet there! I do not want that crappy job!"
Kim narrowed her eyes at him, "What's that supposed to mean?"
Naruto raised his arms in a placating fashion, "I'd just rather be the man behind the scenes. The mob boss or the oyabun, making sure a certain candidate wins the election. Those guys can run things without actually having to run things."
"You know, for someone who saves the world on a regular basis, you have a lot of criminal like tendencies and aspirations." commented Hope.
Kim quirked an eyebrow at him, "She has a point."
Naruto shrugged, "Meh, the world isn't so black and white."
"Then what color is it, orange?" retorted Kim.
Naruto shook his head, "Nah, it's mostly green. Besides, rigging elections is a better use of my time than winning them anyway."
Kim couldn't help but ask, "Why would you want to rig a class election?"
"Practice." replied Naruto.
Even Hope was lost, "Practice?"
Naruto nodded, "When the time comes where we need to save the world by rigging an election, I won't be caught with my pants down. No sir, I'll be good and ready. I'll even give the Fifty Cent Guarantee: I'll win you this election, or die tryin'..."
As the lunch period got underway later that day, Bonnie her small entourage made her way over to the table where Kim, Hope, Naruto, Liz, and a few other members of the cheer squad were seated. Her intentions were no different than any other time, to try and cut down Kim by any means.
"You should just save yourself the embarrassment, Kim and pull out of the race now." taunted the brunette as she stopped in front he table and flipped her hair.
Kim let out a sigh of annoyance, "Why is that Bonnie?"
"Isn't it obvious? You're only going to get two votes!" retorted Bonnie.
"From the fiasco that was your Cheerleader captaincy, we can safely assume that even if Brick was elected, he'd be resigning from the job in two weeks anyway." countered Kim.
Bonnie wasn't fazed, "As if! I should knock those two votes down to one. Your moron of a best friend would end up voting for Brick by mistake."
"Hey!" interjected Naruto. Everyone thought what would follow would be an attempt to defend himself; they were wrong. "You've got to give it up to the Chinese, and not just because they invented the Japanese."
Bonnie and pretty much everyone else stared at him as if was insane, "What?"
"This Lo Mein with Moo Shu Pork is ridiculously awesome. I highly recommend it." casually replied the oblivious Naruto before digging back into the delectable combination of noodles, pork and veggies.
Bonnie smirked, "One vote Kim, one vote."
Kim rolled her eyes, "Really? Well, said best friend just also happens to be the single most destructive force in the history of Middleton high. I say the word and Brick never even makes it to the ballot."
Instinctively knowing he'd been complemented, Naruto burped and bumped fists with her, "You know that's right."
"What's the matter, Kimmie? Can't do anything with your big dumb blond security blanket?" quipped Bonnie.
Kim bit back her retort as Junior rose from his seat gathering everyone's attention with a sarcastic slow clap, "What we just witness all here was another classic bitch moment courtesy of Bonnie Rockwaller. What's a bitch moment, you may ask? Urban Dictionary defines a bitch moment as a point in time where the word "bitch" is forced to be uttered. This pretty much happens every time Bonnie open's her mouth. Bonnie, you've had so many bitch moments that you have evolved beyond being a simple bitch. You miss, are the living embodiment of an internet troll. And now that you've finished trolling, there's only one thing left to do. TROLL FACE!"
As he shouted, he reached into his backpack and pulled out a Halloween style mask before slamming it down on Bonnie's head. The mask turned out to be a perfect replication of Bonnie herself doing the troll entire cafeteria erupted in laughter.
"It's stuck! It burns! It itches! It reeks!" shrieked Bonnie as she struggled to pull the mask off her face.
An ear splitting grin was spread across Naruto's face, "Way to get creative with testing Wade's new Burning, Itching, and Stinking Spray Glue."
Junior smirked and shrugged as Rufus gave him a high five, "I do what I can."
"Here, here! All hail Queen Troll!" proclaimed Vinnie.
"Long live Queen Troll!" chorused everyone before bursting out in laughter again.
As the laughter quieted down, Kim got a beep on the Kimmunicator, "What's the sitch, Wade?"
"You've got two hits, the first of from his royal majesty, King Wallace." informed Wade.
Kim gave him a blank look, "And I should know this person because..."
"He rules a tiny European Nation." replied Wade.
"How small are we talking?" asked Naruto.
"The population is less than the Middleton Mall on a slow day and it makes Senior Senior's Private Island look like Texas." remarked Wade.
"What does he want with us?" questioned Kim.
"His son Wally is doing some sort of rite of passage pilgrimage, and he wants an America High School to be one of his destinations. King Wallace chose Middleton High in the hopes you could keep him out of trouble." explained Wade.
"So basically a baby-sitting job." deadpanned Naruto.
"Exactly, now onto the more pressing matter, somebody stole JP Bearymore! The Pizza Party-Torium will never be the same again!" hysterically exclaimed Wade.
Naruto scoffed, "Good riddance! Chuck E. Cheeses puts that place to shame. We're passing on that job; there is no way in hell I'm rescuing that damn bear."
An hour after school let out, Naruto found himself across town at the family entertainment center/restaurant with Kim. The blond couldn't remember agreeing to do mission, only walking into the janitor's closet with his girlfriend after school and then somehow coming back to his senses at J.P. Bearymore's. Naruto instantly made his distaste for the establishment quite evident for all to see with the sour look on his face once they set foot inside. Kim paid little mind to his grudge, focusing on the task at hand by questioning the distraught manager dressed in the restaurants trademark red vest and bow tie.
"This is a disaster!" yelled the manager. "Why would anyone be so cruel as to steal JP Bearymore?"
Naruto rolled his eyes, "That dumb bear was useless anyway. Just let the hippo take the lead."
The bald headed man stared at him as if he were insane, "The bear was carrying the rest of these hacks! J.P. Bearymore is a state of the art animatronic musician. The rest simply don't compare."
Naruto snorted, "He's got nothing on the Chuckster."
"You don't see anyone trying to steal the mouse mow, do you?" retorted the manager with a smirk.
Naruto narrowed his eyes at the man, "Why you-"
Kim shifted the direction of the conversation back onto the matter at hand, directing their attention to the massive hole in the roof, "Pizza partying animals aside, whoever the thieves were, they weren't very subtle."
Low flying a helicopter in the skies of above Middleton was the aspiring father and son villain duo of the Seniors. Safely tucked away in the back of the helicopter was the stolen animatronic J.P. Bearymore.
"Hehehehe!" cackled Junior as he piloted their chopper away from the scene of the crime.
The elder Senior sighed, "Wrong again, my son. A villainous laugh has much more bass; it's much deeper and has an edge to it. Try again."
Junior rolled his eyes, "The laugh is not important, I've completed the first phase of my plan by getting the bear."
"Yes, but why stop at only the bear?" questioned Senior.
Junior waved off his father's concern, "You know nothing about music, father. Everyone knows that the bear carries the show. The others were useless, especially the off-key otter and idiot squirrel."
"You should never waste an opportunity Junior, especially one to acquire a perfectly good squirrel." reasoned Senior.
"First of all this is my plan and secondly that squirrel was not perfectly good, it looked ridiculous in that outfit!" snapped Junior.
"This is only your plan as long as you make sound decisions." reminded his father.
"Fine, I'll get the other background animals." groaned Junior as he turned the chopper around. "Perhaps I can switch the otter's instrument and put the squirrel in a jumpsuit or something."
Back at the Pizza Party-Torium, Naruto and the manager were still arguing about Chuck E. Cheeses vs. JP Bearymore, while Wade went over the finer details of the case with Kim.
"That bear really is state of the art inside and out, Kim." informed Wade. "It's the Mona Lisa of robotics."
"Then we need to figure out who would want to get their hands on the animatronic technology. If we're lucky they'll come back for more and we can catch them in the act." stated Kim.
Wade nodded in agreement, "We're lucky they stole JP and not one of the others. The restaurant might not have cared if one of the back ground animals went missing."
As Kim talked with Wade, Naruto was so wrapped up in his argument, he didn't even notice the other animals vanishing one-by-one through the ceiling until finally the Hippo drummer next him suddenly lifted up into the air.
"No! Not Pizza-potamus too!" cried the manager.
"Going up, KP!" alerted Naruto as he grabbed onto the leg of the drumming robotic mascot. Kim leaped onto a table before making a dive and grabbing on Naruto's leg as they were lifted up through the ceiling. As the hippo was pulled up through the ceiling, Junior took notice to the extra cargo they were dragging along this time and piloted away from the restaurant.
"It seems we've attracted some attention already. I told you we shouldn't have come back for the others. The clean get away is ruined." complained Junior.
"No my son, this is even better! It's out arch nemesis and his assistant!" cackled Senior as he peered down through the window. "What was her name again? It always escapes me..."
Junior let out a sigh of annoyance, "Lin Principal or something. I will smash them into a wall or something to get rid of them."
"No, no, no! That is not how this goes, Junior. You must give them a chance to shimmy up the cable and do something heroic!" asserted his father.
Junior then noticed that Naruto had indeed shimmied up the hippo and cable with Kim right behind him, "He's way ahead of you father!"
"Yo, el dudes! You can keep the bear, but this Hippo is coming back with me!" shouted Naruto.
Kim sweat-dropped, "Not the bear thing again..."
"Very well, that is a fair trade." replied the elder Senior as he pressed a button to release the clamp holding the Hippo.
Naruto let go of the cable and dropped into a free fall while grabbing a hold of the hippo. He spun in midair and fired off his grappling gun. The hook planted itself into the wall of a nearby building, but left Naruto and the animatronic mascot on a collision course with a brick wall. They were diverted into a friendlier path of descent at the last second thanks to Kim swinging by on her grappling hook changing their direction. The duo and robotic mascot managed to drop down onto the grass of a nearby park relatively easily.
"Well, the thief may have gotten away, but we recovered the important stolen property." declared Naruto.
Kim quirked an eyebrow, "The seniors still got away with J.P. Bearymore."
Naruto grinned, "I did say important stolen property. Pizza-Potamus Pizza Party-Torium will be way cooler than J.P. Bearymore's."
Kim couldn't believe it, "You're still holding a grudge against a fictional mascot after all these years? You were ten!"
A scowl formed across the blond's face, "It doesn't matter, Kim. A ramen crime is an unforgivable crime."
Kim shook her head, "Whatever. Let's get home. Wade says Prince Wally will be arriving in the morning."
"Yeah, your name is the team name, so he's staying at your house." stated Naruto.
"But-" Kim went for the puppy-dog pout, but Naruto started sprinting away from her.
"Black Jack, no take backs, touching black!" he shouted as he tugged on his shirt.
As Naruto walked up to Kim's house the next morning, he spotted the very inconspicuous white stretch limousine pulled up outside the in front of the Possible residence. It soon became quite evident that Prince Wally had arrived and the Naruto had made the correct decision in dumping him off on Kim.
A call rang out from the kitchen house, "Oh, Mrs. Possible!"
"Yes!" replied Anne in mocking mimicking tone to Wally.
Naruto winced at the tone before hurrying inside before Mrs. Dr. P. decided to perform some emergency brain surgery on her kitchen table.
"My cucumber sandwiches must have the crust removed before they are presented to Me." informed Wally.
"No one over the age of ten is allowed to remove crust from a sandwich in America. It's against the law." interjected Naruto as he stepped into the kitchen.
"But, I'm technically a foreign diplomat." reasoned Wally. "The law doesn't apply to me."
"But, I'm not, so if you want no crusts, you'll have to do it yourself." replied a smirking Anne as she walked away.
"I don't know how..." whined Wally.
"Tough luck." replied Kim with a shrug. "Wally this is-"
"Oh right, an introduction. What's up homey homes! I'm you main dude brother-man and such." greeted Wally.
Naruto turned to Kim, "What the dattebayo did he just say?"
"No clue." replied Kim with a shrug. "Wally, this is Naruto. He's-"
He cut her off, "Hold that thought a moment, could you move to the left just a smidge, the blinds are refracting the sun into my eyes."
Naruto froze only for a moment, "I think I just came up with a new wedgie technique, it's called the Prince Wally!"
Kim momentarily put a halt to Wally being Prince Wallied, "Hold it! Wally-"
"Royal highness if it's all the same." he interjected.
Kim gritted her teeth, "Wally, couldn't you just move your chair to the side a few inches."
Wally shrugged, "Well, I suppose if I fancied to move I could, but I really don't at the moment."
Even after only dealing with the boy for a couple pf hours, Kim was about at her wits end.
"So is this the hood or what? Your crib doesn't look anything like the ones on MTV." complained Wally.
"Can't we offload this dweeb on Bonnie or something?" questioned Naruto. "He's rich; she's a gold digging bitch."
Kim scratched her chin in thought, "That isn't entirely a bad idea."
At the protest of Wally, the trio caught a ride to school with Mrs. Possible. The royal pain in the ass complained all the way about how his limousine would have been so much better. Kim reasoned that the limousine stuck out too much for someone trying to stay under the radar, but Wally continued to complain. Naruto momentarily shut him up by claiming that it wasn't cool to be driving through the 'hood' in a limo unless you wanted to get shot or stabbed. Anne voiced her agreement of someone getting stabbed as she eyed the emergency scalpel kit in her purse. Fortunately they managed to arrive at school before Wally opened his mouth again. Naruto hurried Wally out the minivan before Mrs. Possible completely ran out of patience. They couldn't take even two steps out towards the front of the school before Wally was at it again.
"Why am I dressed in these rags? I certainly would prefer my own clothing to this." whined Wally.
'It's official he's not Prince Wally, he's Bitch Wally. Cause all he does is bitch.' thought Naruto.
Kim's thoughts had already progressed beyond the point of words to images flashing through her mind her demonstrating every single one of her sixteen styles of Kung-Fu on Wally. Naruto's timely feed of 'hood' knowledge managed to keep Wally safe for the moment, "It's Hood Rich, the latest gangsta style."
Wally eyes widened in understanding, "Oh really? You Americans have the strangest sense of fashion. I guess these could be burned after I'm done with them."
Kim rolled her eyes, "Yeah, you do that."
The managed to make it another two steps before another interruption, but this time it wasn't Wally.
"Oh, my god he's here!" shrieked a female student.
"There he is! Prince Wally!" squealed another.
The pair of Middleton High girls was the least of their problems. Gathered right behind the pair of girls was a massive crowd including students, teachers, a reporter and a cameraman from the local TV station. The media circus was in full swing for the visiting teenager of royal decent.
"Oh, wow! My very own press conference!" giggled Wally.
Kim sent her best friend a death glare, "What did you do!"
Naruto raised his hands up in a placating fashion, "I only told Hope to spread the word, so we could pawn him off on Bonnie. I had no idea it would turn into this. Besides this is a good thing!"
Kim poked him in the chest, "How is this circus a good thing!"
"If Bonnie is too busy sucking up to Wally and his money, she has no time to run Brick's campaign. The election is in the bag!" reasoned Naruto. To further illustrate his point, he pointed to the "Welcome Prince Wally" banner that was now covering the "Pick Brick" banner on the front of the school, both with a "Paid for by Bonnie Rockwaller" printed in smaller font at the bottom of each.
Kim face-palmed, "I told you I didn't want win a rigged election."
Naruto waved off her concern, "This isn't a rigged election, KP. It's merely coincidental sabotage. I know your inner Kimness is demanding you fight Brick fair and square and kick his butt, but my inner Narutoness wants to remind you that there is no such thing as fair and square in politics."
Kim shook her head, "Inner Narutoness? Really? Do you pay attention to the words coming out of your mouth?"
Naruto shrugged, "On occasion, mostly I drift in and out."
While Kim was giving Naruto the third degree, the news team had moved in to start their piece on Wally. The Prince was all smiles and no complaints once the cameras were on him.
"It's not every day the Middleton plays host to royalty. Prince Wally just arrived in town today and graciously offered to give us an interview. Prince Wally rumor has it you're endorsing someone for the schools upcoming election." stated the female reporter.
Naruto pumped his fist, "Ha! This is going even better than I thought!"
Wally shrugged, "Yes, of course. Kim something-or-other, the redhead who is standing right over there. I personally think she's too uptight and high strung to be a world class leader of my caliber, but I guess she's perfectly sufficient for a class president of a public high school."
"Oh that little weasel..." grumbled Kim.
The reporter smirked, "So, you think that you would make a better class president?"
"Of course, I've been groomed for leadership." confidently replied Wally.
The reporter restated it again, "You're saying that you would make a better class president than Kim Possible?"
"There's no need to say it. It's painfully obvious that I would." replied Wally with a condescending laugh. "Perhaps, I should toss my crown into the ring."
"Oh, this could be really good for you, Kim." murmured Naruto as gathered crowd let out a cheer for Wally.
Kim was bewildered by this, "How is Wally running for class president helping me?"
"Easy, he pushes Brick of out the way and at worst splits his vote." reasoned Naruto. "Brick was a far worse match-up for you. The girls will vote for him because they he's the popular starting QB and the guys because he's the starting winning QB. That would leave you with the smart kids and guys who value your looks over Brick's QB status, not enough to win. Wally on the other hand only has royalty and money going for him, once exposed for being the douche bag he is, you'd take the election in a landslide. It is so on!"
Kim had enough of his scheming for the moment and put her foot down, "No! I decide when it switches from off to on. Right now, my campaign? You're off!"
"Oh, come on!" groaned Naruto.
"Not on, off!" declared Kim as she stormed off.
"Hey, I at least pawned him off on Bonnie, right?" defended Naruto. "You should be thanking me! Kim! Your parents won't cause an international incident by giving Wally emergency surgery and then launching him off to the nearest black hole! Kim! Kim! Aw! Here it goes! "
Election week at Middleton High School was in full effect and the mock debate for the class presidential elections arrived in short order. The week long campaigns consisted of Kim attempting to do things the right way with flyers, posters, and handouts, while Bonnie abandoned Brick's campaign to try and help Wally buy the election. Catered school lunches, giant banners and posters, shirt buttons, and sorts of other "free stuff" were employed to buy student votes. The female population of the school was completely enthralled with Wally, while the male half hated his guts. Fed up with not really making a dent in the minds of the student population, Kim resorted to her last resort just before the debate began.
"It's on!" she muttered while quickly walking past the pair of Naruto and Hope and into the auditorium.
Naruto simply grinned before pressing a button and speaking into his watch, "Guy's spread the word, it's on!"
Hope quirked an eyebrow, "What are you going to do?"
Naruto turned his cheeky grin towards his girlfriend, "Ha! Just try and guess!"
Hope merely responded with a puppy dog pout, causing Naruto to let out an exasperated sigh, "Put that away, already! Here's the freaking plan..."
Minutes later all the students besides Kim, Wally, and Brick were seated in the auditorium with the aforementioned trio standing on stage behind three podiums as they overlooked their peers. Mr. Barkin laid down sound ground rules, essentially turning the debate into more of a trio of campaign speeches than an actual debate. No one truly cared one way or another, they were happy to be out of class. Wally was randomly selected to start things off, and he did so in with his own unique flair.
"It is quite obvious that I am the best candidate for class president. I am the most qualified; leadership is in my blood. It's natural for peasants like yourselves to desire the guidance of superior people like myself." declared Wally. "Now, I believe-"
Vinnie cut him off as he jumped up out of his seat and chucked an empty water bottle at Wally, "Boo this man! Boooooo!"
The male half of the gymnasium began to serenade the young prince with a chorus of Boos, "BOOOOOOOO!"
Mr. Barkin put an end to it once they started throwing even more things, "SETTLE DOWN PEOPLE! This is a debate, not amateur hour at the comedy club!"
"Could have fooled me." muttered Junior, loud enough for everyone to hear.
"DETENTION, JUNIOR!" bellowed Mr. Barkin, as Naruto and Junior bumped fists.
"Lame!" groaned the blond in response.
"WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR FLAGG! LET'S GET THIS SHOW ON THE ROAD!" ordered Barkin.
"Hmmm." hummed the elder Senior as he took a sip of a purple drink with an umbrella in it. He sat on a pink lounge chair in their newest lair while Junior fiddled at a control panel a short distance away from his seat. The lair currently resembled an exotic night club with fuchsia tinted windows and illuminated multicolored dance floor. The stolen robotic animals were all suspended from the ceiling in cages and dressed in disco era clothing. J.P. Bearymore sported a large gold medallion around his neck and a giant red Afro. The only thing missing from the scene was disco ball.
"What is it, father?" muttered Junior as he adjusted the controls to the sound system and lights.
"I didn't say anything." replied Senior as he took another sip of his drink.
"Sure you did, you said 'Hmmm'." countered Junior.
Senior shrugged, "I did not mean to say 'Hmmm'; this is your evil disco, not mine."
"Good!" announced Junior. "Now three, two, one, go!"
Junior pressed down a button on the control panel and the dance floor lit up. The disco themed J.P. Bearymore and pals began to dance to the beat as it blasted through the speakers.
"Yes, yes, it is a very nice display, Junior. But, where is the villainy?" questioned Senior.
"Father, please! We agreed that this was my plan!" whined Junior.
Senior shook his head in exasperation, "Then explain it to me. You've taught the animals to cha-cha-cha, but what is your villainous scheme?"
Junior grinned, "My plan is this: as the funky animals dance to the pounding beat, the crowd will be inspired to do the same."
Senior's eyes lit up with intrigue, "And then?"
Junior broke out in to a victory dance, "Then everyone will party all night long!"
Senior face-palmed, "Everyone one will dance? That is your evil plan?"
Junior wasn't finished, "No! I will also overcharge for parking and beverages! Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!"
'That has got to be the worst evil plan I have ever heard of.' thought Senior with a sweat-drop.
Kim and Naruto were about to make their way home after school when the Kimmunicator beeped.
"What's the scoop Wade?" asked Kim.
"I've got a lead on the Seniors. Junior's been spamming people with an emailed video, check it out." informed Wade.
Wade's image faded away on the Kimmunicator to reveal a video of Junior dancing beneath a strobe light. The video panned around to show a nightclub, with the animatrons dressed up in 70's clothes in cages suspended from the ceiling.
"Love the night life? Like to boogie? Then jam on over to Club Lair, Europe's newest, hottest, and most exclusive Disco! Drive a little and party all night long!"
Kim rolled her eyes, "He sure does love the camera."
"I think he only loves himself more." muttered Naruto.
Wade could only shake his head at the absurdity of it all, "At least they won't be hard to find."
A smirk suddenly formed on Naruto's face, "Alright, I've got a plan. We need to call in a favor to somebody with a Chopper. We'll do the Seniors just like they did the Pizza Party-torium."
Kim scratched her chin as she thought it over, "The only way we'll be able to take them back like that is with no one watching. We'll need-"
Naruto cut her off, "Like I said before, I have a plan. We'll need to make a stop before we head over though. Now is the ultimate test, to determine if it really does go with everything..."
After getting a look at the grin stretched across Naruto's face, Kim decided she didn't really want to know, "You know what, I'll just focus on the retrieval part. Wade, you coordinate with Naruto."
Wade quirked an eyebrow, "You sure? You don't know-"
"And I don't want to know." Kim assured.
Come that night Club Lair was rocking with music for its grand opening. A bright illuminated sign with Junior's face was enhanced by the rotating flood lights that gave the club the "Big Event" feel for the grand opening. Limo's pulled up one after another, dropping off VIPs onto the red carpet. The line was already stretched around the entire courtyard.
"Yes, this is exactly how I envisioned it! We are going to boogie all night long!" declared Junior from inside as he watched the gathering crowd.
"None of this 'boogieing' until after the plan is fully initiated." reminded his father.
Junior rolled his eyes, "Yes, yes, first the plan, then we party."
Senior nodded, "Much better."
Junior scoffed, "This is a stupid plan anyway. I don't care about taking over everything, I just want to da-"
"I forbid you to speak the D-Word!" scolded his father.
Junior shrugged, "Whatever."
His father plastered a big smile onto his face as he went to greet the various VIPs entering the club.
"Welcome, Ambassador! So pleased that you could make it!" exclaimed the elder Senior as he shook the man's hand.
The portly and thickly mustached man then stuck his hand out for Junior to shake. The younger man quirked an eyebrow in annoyance before relenting and shaking the man's hand. The father-son criminal duo stood at the door meeting and greeting until the crowd reached a sizable amount. Some people ventured out onto the dance floor, while the majority just mingled in the various lounging areas and the bar. Right as the crowd really started to perk up; the elder Senior took position at the control panel for the disco. He pulled a lever, causing an opening in the ceiling above the middle of the dance floor to appear and a disco ball descended down. It started spinning and emitting an oddly colored light. The various people down below all turned and looked up to see the new addition to the festivities and promptly all froze and dropped into a hypnotic stupor.
Senior grinned as he rubbed his hands together, "Yes, everything is working perfectly. The intense light of the super neon has been refracted into a hypnotic pattern from the modified Disco Ball. They are all now under our control!"
"You couldn't leave well enough alone, you just had to modify my Disco Ball." grumbled Junior.
His father ignored him as he pulled out a cell phone and hit the third number on his speed dial.
"Hello, Europe." replied a brown haired, the thick bearded man on the other end at some sort of switch board.
"This is Señor Senior, Sr. I am currently in control of a disco crowded with numerous of the World's fabulous VIPs." announced Senior.
The operator sighed, "Can you speak up, sir? The music is very loud."
"The ransom I demand for these VIPs is that you make me, King! King of everything!" demanded Senior.
"Um yeah, I'm going to have to somebody get back to you on that. And if you could turn the music down, that would be great." replied the operator before he dropped what he believed to be a crank call.
"Hello? Are you there? I said King of everything!" shouted Senior into the dial tone.
"Can you hurry up and get this black mail over with?" complained Junior. "I'm ready to party."
"Have some patience, my son. We are about to become royalty!" advised Senior.
Junior rolled his eyes in annoyance, "Royalty, Smoyalty! I just want everybody to d-"
His father clamped his hand over his mouth before he could finish the statement, "Don't say it! The hypnotized victims will immediately follow the first suggestion given!"
"Well, I want them to follow my suggestion!" argued Junior.
"Now is not the time for your insolence!" shot back Senior.
Naruto had really been looking forward to the plan he'd come up with. All in all, it was one of his better schemes; the Seniors weren't going to know what hit them. However, as Team Possible watched the situation unfold from their hiding spot on the rooftop, it became painfully obvious that a well thought out plan was entirely unnecessary. A standard Kim unleashes all sixteen styles of Kung-Fu plan wasn't needed. Even a half-baked, pulled straight out of Naruto's ass at last minute plan wasn't necessary. The Seniors left a massive opening that simply could not, not be exploited. Naruto face-palmed as the Seniors continued to bicker with each other, "Are they really going to make it this easy?"
Kim shrugged, "Hey, they're from your gallery of rouges, not mine."
"Wade, change of plans. Could you connect the sound system to my radio frequency?" asked Naruto.
"Please and thank you!" added Kim.
"One second and...done!" replied Wade.
The bickering of the Seniors came to an abrupt halt when the club music suddenly stopped and the sound of someone clearing their throat came over the sound system, "Ladies and Gentlemen, this is your Captain speaking. First, I would like to thank you all for participating in today's retro club sampler drill. Had you been in any real danger, you'd all be completely screwed. Who in their right mind accepts an invitation to the home of known criminals? You're just begging to be robbed and kidnapped. Then you'll be like, 'Oh please Mr. and Ms. Teen Hero, save us!' Maybe, next time Mr. Teen Hero will be with his girlfriend and Ms. Teen Hero will be at club banana getting her shop on, both too busy to save your sorry asses."
'Hell yeah!' thought Kim as she nodded in agreement.
"Disco is dead folks. And half of ya'll is way too old to try and be out partying anyway. Next time, stay in count your money and knit a sweater or something. Now, on the count of three you will all regain your senses and exit the club in a nice and orderly fashion. And on a more pleasant note, I would like to thank all of you for flying D-Force Airlines. One, two, three!"
"No, what have you done!" exclaimed Senior as all the gathered VIPs made for the exits.
"That was pretty cool..." muttered an awed Junior.
Senior smacked his son across the back of the head, "Never be in awe of your enemies!"
"You shouldn't blame him, Senior. I'm just that good." boasted Naruto as he and Kim dropped down from the ceiling.
"Don't get ahead of yourself too quickly, my arch foe. The disco ball wasn't the only modification I made to this plan. Attack my robotic animal pawns!" commanded Senior as me moved to activate the stolen animatrons.
"Hold that thought for just a moment!" interjected Kim.
Senior foolishly held back from pressing the button, "Why?"
Kim held her hand up to silence him, "Wait for it...and now!"
Suddenly Senior's cellphone rang and he answered, "Hello, this is Senior...Now is not a good time, Mother...No...I didn't say any such thing...No...(sigh)...Wait, do not put her on the phone! Junior is busy!...I said...(sigh)...Here son, your mother wants to talk to you."
Junior grabbed the phone from his father, "Yes, he did it again. I just wanted to dance, mother! But father...But that was father! I didn't...Yes, Mama...Yes, Mama..."
"You win this round, my arch foe, but the next time you won't be so lucky!" declared Senior as he pulled out a remote and activated it. Smoke rose from the ground and surrounded Seniors; once it cleared, they were nowhere to be found.
"Well, they did the disco ball behind. We could use that to 'help' with the election." suggested Naruto.
Kim scoffed, "I'm not that desperate."
Naruto shrugged before firing his grappling hook and moving to retrieve it anyway, "Wade might be able to do something with it."
It had been a typical day at Middleton High two days prior to the election, students and teachers milling about to get to out of school just after the final bell rang. Just your average end to a day until suddenly all hell broke loose. The phone in the school office rang, causing the office aide to come running out of the filing room to answer it. The moment she did, a student desk came hurtling through the window facing the hallway causing her to duck for cover. Shattered glass flew everywhere as the desk crashed into the copy machine and sent papers flying everywhere. The sound of a classroom door slamming echoed throughout the halls before being abruptly followed by a second smash of glass as a figure crashed through the window of the history classroom into the hallway. Students and faculty alike were shell-shocked by the sight of someone dressed up as the Burger King, complete with the crowned mask, white leggings, flowing puffy red robe, large medallion hanging around his neck, and golden sack hefted over his shoulder. The grey haired history teacher, Roland Colby, came rushing out the door to his classroom only to slip on a banana peel the King left in his path.
"Somebody stop that King! He's crazy!" shouted Mr. Colby as he tumbled into some lockers.
A pair of boys from the basketball team went to tackle to royally disguised figure. A quick stutter step from the King left them tumbling to the floor with broken ankles as he darted by and hip-checked the advancing janitor into a trash can. The King paused and wagged his finger at the spectating students and teachers in taunting fashion, before nailing unsuspecting bystanders in the face with unwrapped cheeseburgers he had hidden in his sack. The King mimed laughing at them before bolting out the double-door exit to cause more chaos elsewhere.
An oblivious Vinnie strolled by a snatched a burger from the face of a girl on the floor and took a bite, "Delicious!"
As Vinnie enjoyed his burger, the King's left a trail of chaos in wake while making his way to the football field where practice was in session.
"Let's run that play again, people! And we're going to keep on doing it until you get it right!" barked Mr. Barkin from the sidelines. The players scrambled into position around the line of scrimmage, the 35-yard line.
Brick stepped to the line of scrimmage and got under center, "Blue 42! Blue 42! Hut! Hut! Hut!"
As the center snapped the ball Mr. Barkin noticed that there were only ten men on the field for his defense. He was about to blow the play dead with his whistle until he spotted a figure sprinting onto the field at the last second out of the corner of his eye and decide to let the play continue. This would soon prove to be a terrible mistake. Brick took a five-step drop, planted his back foot, and fired the ball 20 yards down the middle of the field on a post route. The pass looked to be on target when at the last second a defender jumped the route and intercepted it, but it wasn't just any defender. It was the King!
"What the hell?" muttered Brick in confusion.
The rest of the defenders didn't even realize they had fast food royalty playing free-safety as they started blocking offensive players to open up a return lane. The King sped down the sideline into open field, too fast for anyone to catch as he high stepped the last fifteen yards into the end zone. The players all stopped and stared at him with dumbfounded expressions as the King performed a touchdown dance.
"What are you standing around like idiots for? Get him off my field!" bellowed Mr. Barkin.
The all moved to take down the King, but not before he could retrieve his golden sack from behind the goalpost and tag Mr. Barkin in the face with his last burger.
"YOU'RE FINISHED BURGER FOOL!" roared Mr. Barkin as he joined the chase.
The players and coach lost sight of him for a moment as he leaped over a fence and ran behind the bleachers. Once they got behind the bleachers they couldn't see him, but the saw his dropped golden sack and continued to give chase towards the parking lot. Mr. Barkin was so furious when he ran by that he didn't even bother to harass Naruto and Hope who were playing tonsil hockey underneath the bleachers. The players and coach continued the chase across the parking before running out of real estate and finding no sight of the robbed figure. Mr. Barkin started letting his players have it until he realized when and where he'd just seen Naruto. He led them back to the bleachers, but by then the blond and his girlfriend were long gone along with any evidence.
"STOPPABLE!" bellowed the vice principal in frustration.
'Royalty Can't Be Trusted' was the motto of the Possible campaign's last minute push in the election. Posters, T-shirts, buttons, and even a YouTube video of the King's misadventures were the talk of the school. The fact that they hyped up the resemblance between Wally's father, King Wallace, and the costumed King didn't hurt either. Wally couldn't recover from the onslaught of the scandal, and Kim won the election in a landslide. To celebrate, party was thrown at Naruto's least favorite place in town, J.P. Bearymore's Pizza Party-Torium. Naruto sat in the same spot with a scowl on his face, as everyone around him enjoyed cheap pizza and video games.
"I don't get it. What exactly is your beef with a J.P. Bearymore?" questioned Tara. "He's just a mascot."
"It's the mascot of heathen's is what it is!" retorted a scowling Naruto.
Kim shook her head, "Let me regale you with the disastrous tale of Naruto's tenth birthday party..."
The entire party gathered for Naruto's birthday froze in stunned silence as the J.P. Bearymore mascot did the one thing you should never do on Naruto's birthday, spill the entirety of his birthday ramen on the floor.
The blond child was like a volcano on the edge of eruption, "You...you..."
The man in mascot suit clearly misunderstood the magnitude of the situation, "It was just ramen. Here kid, have some pizza and a can of Mountain Dew."
"No!" shouted Naruto's father, but it was too late. It soon became obvious why Mountain Dew was a banned substance in the Stoppable household. The young blond downed the drink like Pop-Eye downing a can of spinach and that was all she wrote for his sanity.
"LET'S GO!" shouted Naruto.
The costumed employee chuckled at him, "Chill out, kid."
"Shut up JP Jelly-more! I'm ten years old, but I'll beat your fat ass!" yelled Naruto.
His Cousin Shawn loved the show and egged him on, "Kick him in the back of the head!"
Naruto chucked his pizza at him, "I'm gonna come at you like a spider monkey! Chuck E. Cheese would run circles around your fat ass and bite your head off!"
The mascot was starting to freak out a little, "What the hell is up with this kid? He's crazy!"
"I'm all hopped up on Mountain Dew! Let's go!" taunted Naruto.
Before Naruto could launch himself at the restaurant mascot, his scowling and embarrassed mother grabbed him the collar of his shirt and dragged the bezerk child away, "Come on! Lemme at him! Let me go! I'll get him! Lemme at him! I'll get you for this! You won't get away with this! I'll get you! You're all mine!"
Kim stood there with her jaw dropped, while Anne could barely manage to hold back her laughter. James and DJ couldn't help themselves and were laughing their asses off.
"You better have had the camera rolling." declared James.
Naruto's father, DJ, was grinning from ear to ear, "Got the whole thing!"
There was a brief moment of silence as Kim finished her story, before everyone suddenly erupted in laughter.
"Yeah, yeah, laugh it up. I take this shit seriously." grumbled the blond.
After the party concluded and everyone was making their way across the parking-lot to their respective rides home, Naruto felt someone staring at him and turned back to find none other than the J.P. Bearymore mascot standing outside the doors of the restaurant. A fire lit in Naruto's eyes as he finally came face to face with the original menace, the same man in the same bear suit. They stared one another down like a pair enemies from an epic martial arts movie. The bear suited man raised his paw covered hands into the air to show off a pair of nun-chucks, throwing down the gauntlet so to speak.
"Hey, you guys wait here a sec." stated Naruto as he narrowed his eyes at the man/bear. "I've got some unfinished business to take care of."
Naruto spat at the ground as he stalked towards the mascot, "I've been waiting on this day for six years now..."
The man made a threatening grunt as he stretched out the nun-chucks in front of his body. Naruto's face contorted into a menacing sneer before they both suddenly sprinted right at each other. Naruto leaped into the air to perform a spinning, while the bear leaped to meet him with a flying kick of his own. The met in a clash in midair as their long awaited battle had finally begun...
And we're back and moving right along. Not much to say, just do what you do and hit that review button.