Frank woke up and looked to the empty side of the bed. I miss him. He is not going to be back. Immediately he started to cry. When he was able to control himself and stop crying, he went to the bathroom and looked to the mirror. His hair has all messed up. There were cuts on his face. He took his clothes off and got inside the shower. He looked to his arms. There were cuts all over them and his legs were just the same. The water was hot and it made his body hurt a lot more than it already did. Then he dressed a large T-shirt, some old jeans. He entered his car and drove to Ray's house. He knocked three times and waited.
"Oh, hey Fr… What's wrong? Are you okay?" Christa asked.
"Can I just speak to Ray?" He asked, a little nervous.
"Come in Frank." She said, letting him enter. "Honey! Frank is here and he wants to talk to you. He's upstairs in the room. Third door on the left."
Frank smiled at her and left her.
"Can I come in Ray?" He asked when he was in front of Ray's bedroom door.
"Of course. What's wrong?" He looked to his face, filled with red lines. "You look terrible."
Frank looked at him and began to cry.
"You started to cut yourself again didn't you? Oh my god Frank! What happened now?"
"What do you mean?"
"We argued and he packed his bags and left."
"I don't know. He didn't say anything to me after…"
"After what Frank?"
"After I told him I hated him and I wished I never met him."
"You are kidding me right? Was it that bad?"
"This cuts on my face, they were made by broken glasses that came from a flower jar." Frank answered, pointing to his face.
"Okay, start by the beginning. How did the argue began?"
"I don't know Ray…Our relationship wasn't that great. We said a lot of things we didn't felt."
"What did he say to make you say that?"
"He said: "Why do you even bother to say you love when you don't?" I lost my head and I screamed that I hated him and that I wish I have never met him. He just stood there, looking at me, chocked. Then went to our bedroom, packed his bags and left."
Frank looked to his phone. Someone was calling him. He picked up.
"Yes? Oh Brendon. I needed to talk to you, by the way. Uhuh. Okay. Be in my house in half an hour." And hang up.
"Look Ray, I have to go. Thank you for your time."
When Frank got home he dialed Brendon's phone number once again.
"Hey. It's me again. We broke up."
"Really? You were so in love. He made you so happy. Do you want to spend a few days here?"
"Do you mind if Ryan comes too?"
"Of course not. He can come f he wants"
Half an hour later, Brendon and Ryan were at Frank's house. Brendon and Frank were best friends since they were five years old. Frank always told him everything and no one knew him better than Brendon and vice-versa.
Brendon rang the bell, but no one answered, so he entered the house by the backyard door, that was always opened.
"Frank, honey? Where are you?"
Brendon and Ryan went upstairs and found the bathroom door locked.
"Frank, open this door. NOW!"
He opened the door.
"Oh, my darling. You are crazy." Frank had blood all over him. His arms and legs had new cuts.
"You have to stop that! I mean it. Look to your arms and legs! They look terrible." Brendon hugged him. Frank was almost fainting.
"Now, we'll give you a bath and after it you will eat. No arguments."
After the bath, Frank looked to them, like he was asking them to leave him alone for a couple of minutes.
"Oh, no. We ain't leaving honey. We don't want you to make something stupid again."
So he went to his room, and the couple followed him.
While he got dressed, Brendon put his clothes inside the bag, that was already in the top of the bed.
"He called me." He could finally say. "He said that he was going to leave this town because he didn't want to see me ever again. He added that…" He started to cry and Ryan ran to hug him. "That he didn't think that we were going to work. And that he wanted to forget what happened yesterday… and me."
"Oh good god. And did you say?"
"I said that I'd rather die if I couldn't be with him. I could hear him crying. Then he hang up."
Brendon and Ryan finished packing his bag while Frank ate. Then they took him to his house and added a bed in their bedroom.
"You know… I'm 25 years old. I can take care of myself."
"Obviously you can't." He said, pointing to his arms. "You are going to stay here. No arguments."
"Fine! Mom." He said, with a small smile. "Thanks for being such good friends for me."
"Now, go to sleep. You look tired."
Frank got inside the bed, without taking his clothes off and immediately fell asleep.
3 years earlier
"Gerard. I have to tell you something."
Frank was Gerard's old friend. They haven't seen each other for almost 5 years. Back then they were best friend and were always together.
But now, things were different.
"I don't like you like I used to, Gee."
"What do you mean? We can't be best friends? You are sick of me?"
"What I mean is… I love you."
Gerard looked in his eyes. He knew he wasn't lying.
"Jesus! I… I… I don't know what to say Frankie."
"Oh my god! I'm stupid! I ruined everything!"
"Because you don't love back and now our friendship is ruined!"
"How do you know I don't love you too?"
"Because you're fucking perfect. I mean… You are gorgeous to me… And I'm… me. I'm an emo boy that cuts himself and doesn't deserve anyone's love. How would you love me?"
Gerard came closer to him and held his hand.
"Don't you ever say that you don't deserve me again, okay? You are an angel. A perfect little angel. My angel." He whispered in his ear.
Then Gerard touched Frank's lips with his.
"I… L-O-V-E… you" He said, while they were kissing. Frank got closer to him and put his hands on his face.
Gerard bit his ear, and then he kissed his cheek.
"Don't cry. Please." He said, in a lower tone and hugged him.
"Thank you Gee."
"I don't know. For making me see that my life isn't as bad as it seems."
"I will remember this day… Forever."
Frank woke up and look to his left. There was Brendon and Ryan sleeping like there was nothing wrong. He got up and went to the bathroom. He couldn't forget that day… Those words. He looked to the mirror and there was no longer a long black hair boy. His hair was again blond in the sides and had that mohawk he wore when he was about twenty.
"This is a dream. I'm hallucinating."
"Is it? Look to your hand." Said the Frank that was in the mirror. The normal Frank looked to his hand. He was holding a knife.
"That… that… that… doesn't change what I said."
The mirror Frank smirk and cut his wrist.
Frank looked to his wrist. It had blood on it, but it wasn't hurting and his knife had no blood.
"Who are you? And what do you want?"
"I'm your angel. In your past form."
"But angels are supposed to be good."
"Supposed to be, but they really aren't. You see, we are the reincarnation of your pasts moods. You were an angry and maniac kid, so that's how I am."
"But I'm changed now. Why don't you change too?"
"You are? I don't think so. But anyway, I'm here to help you."
"You are going to die in three days, or…"
"Or he dies."
"Kill me. Now."
"Wait. I haven't finished yet. You are going to die in three days saving him from a car crash. If you want him to die in three days, that's your choice. But if you die saving him, he will meet someone in that same day, fall in love, get married and have children with that person."
"And I can't change the future?"
"I'm giving you this choice. The only choices you have."
Frank sat on the toilet and started to cry.
"If he dies, I'll kill myself."
"You won't because you will start to react like you're crazy because you'll be screaming at me and Brendon will put you in a mental house. And there's no way you can kill yourself there."
"He will live and be happy. I will die. I'm dead either way. I can't survive without him."
Frank got out of the bedroom and went to bed again, trying to get back to sleep. But he couldn't. All he could think about was Gerard knowing someone and not giving a shit if he was alive or not.
So he picked up his phone and dialed his number.
"Frank? Why are you calling me so late?"
"If I died, would you care?"
"What are you talking about?"
"I'm going to die. I don't want to, but I am. Will you cry? Will you miss me?"
"Oh god Frank. Don't kill yourself. I'm not that important."
"I'm not going to kill myself. I'm going to save you."
"I… can't say nothing else. Just answer the question. Please."
"I will miss you like there was no tomorrow. I will cry my eyes out. Don't save me. I can't stand the world without you."
"You will. I promise you."
"I want to be with you until you die. Please."
"Do you want to go for a walk?"
Frank woke Brendon.
"I'm going for a walk. Don't worry. I promise I won't cut or kill myself, dear. Now go back to sleep." And kissed him in the forehead.
He took a bath and dressed those skinny jeans he loved and a black leather jacket with a white shirt underneath.
He got out off the house and walked to the park where he kissed Gerard for the first time. And there he was. A tall figure, with long beautiful, shiny hair, green eyes and a tiny nose, looking at him.
"Your eyes are even more beautiful with the moon light." Gerard said when Frank was by his side.
"It was here. Three years ago." Frank replied, ignoring his commentary and looking up.
"You were such a bad kisser."
"No, I wasn't."
"Yes, you were. You were crying and could barely breathe."
"Well, you weren't that good too."
"How do you know that?"
"Because you're better now." He said.
Gerard looked at him and, with a quick move, approached his lips.
"Don't." Frank turned away, avoiding a kiss.
"Why? You love me, I love you. Why can't we be together again?"
"Because I don't want to hurt you. I'm afraid of your pain when I die."
"I'll kill myself after."
"Please, don't do it. You deserve to live."
"And you don't? Please Frank, think twice."
"I prefer dying that seeing you dying."
"Please don't die, Frankie." Gerard's voice was braking and its tone was lower. "I love you. I'm not ready to live without you."
Frank looked into his eyes and hugged him. He found comfort and love and all he could think about was leaving Gerard.
"I don't…" Frank started to cry. "Want.. to... die… I don't… want… to… leave you."
"But I don't want to see you dying. I don't want to see you… dead."
Gerard started to cry too.
Suddenly, a light appeared out of nowhere and they saw a white figure coming out of it.
"Hello" said the creature. "I'm the angel of love. My name is Daisy. Frank, you are not going to die. And neither are you, Gerard. That angel you saw earlier was the angel of the fears and he revealed one of your worst nightmares. But they are not going to happen. You must believe in your love and believe in yourselves."
"Why did that angel appeared."
"Because you were in your weaker phase and he appears to everybody that are like that. He has already appeared to Gerard, before he met you. He said that he was going to meet someone and they were going to fall in love, but that person was going to leave Gerard and he was going to die.
Don't forget that you are not alone. Don't ever give up on yourselves and remember that you are always loved by each other." And with that, Daisy vanished.
Gerard and Frank looked to each other, smiled, held hands. They leaved, stronger than ever.