A yell of frustration reached Dr. Maura Isles' ears, followed soon by running footsteps. Down the hallway, turn the corner, through the door, and—

"Hello Jane."

"Dead people don't pinch, right?"

Maura paused, and then a smile crossed her face. "You didn't wear green today, did you?"

"I forgot, okay? My coffee machine decided to have… seizures today, and then Joe Friday was tormenting Shellboy, so I had to separate them, and… I forgot." Jane's eyes fell on the body Maura was currently examining. "Oh, what happened to him?"

"Him?"

"Wait, that is a him, right?"

"She has been in the water for quite some time. Surfaced this morning."

Jane looked at the body again and shook her head. "If someone kills me, I just want to be shot. Don't take the time to dump my body in the water. Just shoot and leave, okay?"

"Interesting choice. So, how many times have you been pinched today?"

"Five, and let me tell you, they are not forgiving!"

Maura finally looked up at her friend as Jane pulled off her jacket. "Oh, I see what you mean. Luckily, I have taken precautions against pinching."

"Precautions?" Jane said, raising an eyebrow. "Maura, you look like a tall… shamrock."

The doctor smiled. "Thank you, Jane."

"Are you even wearing green underwear, dare I ask?"

"Well, actually, I have this adorable bra that's white and has little shamrocks where—"

"Okay, I get it, thank you."

A pause.

"Oh, okay, um... you're green enough. Give me something to wear."

A puzzled look crossed Maura's face. "What? No, I can't do that. It would throw off my entire wardrobe."

"Maura, come on! If I go back out there without something green, I will be pinched to the point of shooting everyone, and then you'll be an accomplice."

Maura looked down in thought. Finally, she looked back up at Jane with a smile. "I've got it." The doctor went over to where her purse was and rummaged through it for a few moments before returning to where Jane was and pinning something to her shirt. "There, see?"

Jane looked down at the object. "A smiling shamrock Maura? Really?"

"Oh, wait." Maura pushed a button on the pin and it lit up while playing a jaunty tune. The doctor's smile grew. "See? Isn't that just adorable?"

A vein in Jane's forehead twitched. "You know what? I'd rather be pinched," she said, taking the pin off and placing it back in her friend's hand.

"But Jane—"

"It will be less painful than wearing Mr. Smiley Shamrock," Jane said as she started to leave.

"Jane… oh, bother. Jane come back. Look, you can wear my shirt, even though it won't look good with your jacket at all."

Jane smiled to herself, knowing she had gotten her way yet again. She turned and went back to where Maura was pulling off her own jacket. "Hold this," the doctor said, handing the jacket to Jane. She unbuttoned her shirt before taking it off reluctantly. "Here."

Jane set Maura's jacket on her desk as she pulled her own shirt over her head. The two swapped and Jane started buttoning up her new shirt. "See, that wasn't too hard, was it? And now you'll feel better knowing that I won't get pinched anymore."

"I suppose… but this shirt just clashes with all my other clothes," Maura sighed, slipping back into her jacket.

"Look, I'll make it up to you, okay?"

"You'll let me go out with you and the others tonight?"

Jane winced. "Let's not get ahead of ourselves here."

"Come on, Jane. I want to try that game you keep telling me about."

"It's called beer pong, and besides, you don't even drink beer."

"I could try."

Jane sighed, knowing she had to get back to work. There was no more time to fight with her friend. "Fine, fine, you can come," she said as she started to leave the morgue. "But don't say I didn't warn you."


"Janie, you're coming with us right?"

"Jane! Jane, wait for me!"

Jane sighed. "I'll meet you there, okay Frankie?"

Her brother smiled. "Did Maura convince you into taking her?"

"Just go!"

Frankie laughed as he walked away just as Maura came up to her friend.

"I'm ready to go have some St. Patrick's Day fun," the doctor said with a smile.

"Are you sure you can handle being in a real bar on one of the biggest drinking nights of the year?" Jane asked as she opened the driver's door.

"Of course. I have prepared myself both physically and mentally," Maura replied, closing the passenger door as she climbed in.

Jane started the car with another sigh. "I hope so."


The bar was much louder than Maura had expected, but she wouldn't allow the noise level to put a damper on her night.

"Here, you'll need this," Jane said over the noise, handing her friend a bottle of beer.

"Can I at least put it in a fancy glass?" Maura asked.

"Wha—no, just drink it."

Maura obliged while Jane led her over to where Frankie and the others were playing a game of beer pong.

"Wow, Jane, I didn't realize beer could taste this good," Maura said.

"I'm so glad you approve," Jane replied, giving Frankie a don't-you-dare-say-anything look.

"Hey, you two want to play?" Frost asked, looking at Jane and Maura.

"Me against Maura? I don't think so," Jane said.

"Are you implying that I wouldn't be an equal opponent?" Maura asked.

"Well, come on Maura. I mean, you've never… it wouldn't be…"

Maura moved to the other end of the table. "Come on Jane, unless you're too scared."

Jane shook her head. "Fine. If that's what you want, but don't say I didn't try to be nice."

Maura tossed the first ball and it landed in one of Jane's cups. The doctor smiled. "I don't need nice."

Jane couldn't think of a time when she had suffered a more crushing defeat. She should have known Maura better; the doctor knew exactly what angle to bounce the ball at so that it would land in any of Jane's cups. Jane managed to get a ball into only three of Maura's cups, while the doctor hit all ten cups, no miss.

"I told you, I don't need nice," Maura said.

"Rematch. Right now."


By the time the third game was over, Jane was still losing, and she was thoroughly drunk. Maura decided that enough was enough and left the game to help her friend back out into her car.

"You… very good…"

"It's simple mathematics, Jane," Maura replied, putting the seat belt on her friend before she closed the door. The doctor crossed around to the other side and climbed into the driver's seat, closing the door behind her.

"Maura… I wanna tell you a secret…"

The doctor looked at her friend. "What is it?"

A grin crossed Jane's face. "Come here."

Maura leaned towards her friend and Jane put an arm around her neck, pulling her close.

"I work… with dead people…"

"Jane, that's no secret. You're a homicide detective," Maura said, pulling away.

"I know. I just got scared to tell you my real secret."

"Real secret?"

There was that grin again. "Come here."

"I'm already here!"

"You know that doctor that works in the morgue…?"

"Yes, I know Maura Isles."

"Well, I have a crush on her."

Maura froze. "A… crush?"

Jane nodded as she turned her in seat, trying to find a comfortable position. "Yeah… I think I love her…"

"You love her?"

"Shhh! Don't tell Maura…"

The doctor didn't know how to reply. She didn't know if that was just the alcohol talking, or if… well, would it be wrong to hope that Jane had really meant what she said? Maura looked over at her sleeping friend before she started the car and pulled away from the bar.


"Oh god, I am never playing beer pong with you again," Jane said, entering the morgue with an ice pack up against her forehead. "So, how did you like going out? Pretty crazy, huh?"

"Yes… it was certainly a… revealing experience."