This is the beginning of an incredibly long, awesome, pure crack, crossover fanfiction. It includes: Kuroshitsuji, Black Rock Shooter, Death Note, Bakemonogatari, Crimson Spell, and Pandora Hearts.

The meaning of the title is "a Story of an Earl, his Demon Butler, and His Lover."

It also contains yaoi, yuri, and het. and a whole lot of stuff we just randomly came up with.


CHAPTER 1

Ciel Phantomhive yawned slightly, as he slowly inched himself over to the edge of the bed. He glanced to either side, disappointed at the lack of his butler.

"Sebastian!" He called in an irritable and disapproving tone. Ciel was about to call for his butler again when the black-haired butler rounded the corner and entered his room.

"Apologies, young master, there was an important phone call for you." He said, pouring tea into a delicate china cup.

"Today you are having Earl Grey Tea." Sebastian said calmly, handing the cup to Ciel. He bent down onto one knee and started unbuttoning Ciel's nightshirt.

"What call could be so important that you'd disobey your master?" Ciel asked sternly, his dark blue eyes keeping steady on Sebastian's figure.

"It was from Japan." Sebastian spoke in his normal stoic tone. Ciel's eyebrows raised slightly at the word,

"Japan? What do they want with us?" He mumbled.

"It's not what they want with us, the Queen wants us to assist them." Sebastian explained. Ciel looked surprised for a moment,

"with what?"

"Apparently there is someone murdering criminals all over the world." He stated simply.

"And what's wrong with that? Criminals are filthy humans who deserve to die." Sebastian gave him a hard stare.

"The Queen ordered us to assist in their investigation. It is your job to do what she wishes, you do remember that, correct?" His tone was so stern, that Ciel felt his stomach churning a little.

"Of course, I am the Queen's loyal watchdog. Where will we start? Do they know anything so far?" He asked, glancing down as Sebastian tied a bow around his neck.

"The killer has been given the name Kira. They say he is located in Kanto, Japan, and the Queen fears he may go into hiding in England." He avowed.

"And how exactly does he commit all of these widespread murders?" Ciel asked in a skeptical tone.

"The Death Note. It's a notebook with otherworldly properties. It is a rare artifact that Shinigami use to kill people. If you write a persons name in the Death Note, they will die."

"Shinigami? Like Grell?" Ciel mumbled, not wanting to remember his incident with the crazy Shinigami.

"Not exactly. There are two different kinds of Shinigami. Shinigami like Grell are in charge of collecting souls, while other Shinigami are in charge of killing humans. The other main difference is their ancestors. Grell's ancestors come from angels. Whilst the other Shinigami came from Demons." Sebastian said, standing back up and eyeing over his work.

"I see. So where are we going to start?" Ciel asked, following Sebastian's lead and standing onto his feet.

"The head investigator is coming to meet with us today, along with his comrades." Sebastian informed him, leading him to his office.

"They will be here just after noon." Ciel sat down on his chair and sighed quietly to himself. He glanced out a large window that stood behind him. He noticed two figures talking in the garden. One was wearing a maid's outfit, and had bright pink hair. The other figure was unfamiliar to Ciel, as it had short, black hair, and was much shorter than Mey-Rin.

"Sebastian."

"Yes my Lord?" Sebastian responded as usual.

"Go fetch me Mey-Rin, and bring her friend with her." He mumbled. Sebastian knelt down,

"yes, my lord." He said obediently, then got back up and walked out of the room. Ciel didn't have to wait long until the two figures in the garden disappeared. He turned his attention back towards the door, and glanced down at the papers on his desk every so often. It wasn't much longer until Sebastian returned.

"Y-you asked for me, young master?" Mey-Rin asked in her usual skittish tone, lowering herself slightly.

"Mey-Rin, in case I have never told you this before, you are not permitted to bring guests onto the Phantomhive estate without my permission." He said sternly, his voice raising slightly to make his point clear.

"You," he said, turning to the other girl.

"What's your name?" he asked, glaring at her.

"K-kuroi Mato!" She stuttered.

"I'm sorry, but I am here on a field trip, and I got separated from my class! I was asking her for directions!" She continued, her voice wavering a little.

"Sebastian, serve us breakfast, and then make sure she finds her group." He ordered, Sebastian nodded in response, turned and left.

Mato sat at the opposite end of the table from Ciel. Sebastian stepped into the room.

"bocchan, for breakfast today I have prepared English muffins and apple pancakes, with New Moon Drop Tea.." He placed a thin china plate in front of his master, and poured him a cup of tea. The butler went to the other end of the table and approached their guest. "Would you like tea or coffee, my lady?"

"Um!" Mato blushed, "Tea's fine!"

Ciel glared at Mato. "Sebastian!" he barked. "This is an order. Find this girl's group as fast as possible."

"Yes, my lord," Sebastian said, bowing to his master. He quickly walked out the door.

Ciel and Mato ate in silence. Mato would occasionally glance up at Ciel while she was eating. Just as Mato was finishing her plate, Sebastian returned.
"My lady, your group has been found. The maid is serving them tea in the parlor."

Ciel's eyes widened. "What?" he turned to Sebastian. "Maylene's serving them tea?"

Sebastian smiled. "Yes. Is that a problem?"

"Of course." Ciel glared at his butler.

"I apologize, my lord, I shall stop her at once."

Mato watched all this with wide eyes. "u-um... should I come too? To join up with my group, I mean," she said quickly.

Sebastian nodded. "Follow me," he said. Mato nodded. They both left the room.

Ciel leaned back in his chair.