I have started this alone, and I must finish it alone. There is no longer a
choice. I know I must use myself as the subject for the experiment.
It is done. I have injected 5 centiliters of the newly infused Formula HJ7. Pulse rate increasing. Salty, bitter taste. Stings the tongue. Warm in the gullet. Heat spreading strongly through my veins. A slight feeling of euphoria. Light-headedness. No noticeable behavioral differences. If I could, I'd show the world I...
4:00 and all is well. Un-expected development. Free.
This is a strange, new, sweet sensation. I am younger. lighter, happier in body and soul - twice as alive and tenfold more wicked - which intoxicates and delights me like wine - adding fearful new hardships to my desperate battle for success.
The experiments are now in their second week. The transformations are beyond imagining. Such delirium occurs that I can only recall feeling younger, lighter, and twice as alive. I have altered the balance of the formula, in hopes to remember more about these strange, new, sweet sensations. Unspeakable nightmares besiege my senses, the most racking pains, and a horror of the spirit that exceeds all dreams of death. As delightful as wine, yet tenfold more intoxicating. Tonight I shall...
Day four of the latest adjusted formula. I believe I may finally be experiencing results with developing a memory of these nightly altered states. Faint shadows of wicked, unspeakable images keep haunting me. Dear God, I pray these are merely nightmares.
We are here alone, terrible. More terrible or dangerous than any beast stalking its prey. More terrible nightmares, the most racking pains, and a horror of the spirit that exceeds all dreams of death.
The experiment is out of control. The beast has taken a heavy toll not only on me, who can yet be saved, but but on others who cannot. The transformations are starting to occur of their own accord. I cannot bear much more. I have radically altered the balance of the formula to try to contain and overcome the powerful and darker forces at work inside me. I remain convinced there is a way to counteract the effects of the formula, but I must have new chemicals for the antidote soon. Every day they say they will be delivered, but still they do not come! I dare not leave this place. I am dangerous - more dangerous than any wild beast stalking its prey. I know well that I risk death! I am aware of my peril, and the need to control Hyde's evil influence. I am slowly losing control of myself. I dare not continue taking these nightly formulas. This Edward Hyde is a part of me, he reeks his vengeance on a contemptible world, and yet he then disappears within me, like a stain of breath upon a mirror. He has found the perfect hiding place, within me. He is cruelty incarnate, everything I've wanted to eradicate from man's nature. And yet, so wonderful is his love of life. My two natures have memory in common. I am aware that I am slowly losing hold of my original and better self. And becoming absorbed into my second, and worse self. Hyde, alone in the ranks of mankind, is pure evil. As Jekyll, I can share in the pleasures and wickedness of Hyde. I have more than a father's interest in him, and he has more than a son's indifference towards me! As Hyde, I care only for myself and nothing for Jekyll! As Jekyll, I know how Hyde fears my power to cut him off by suicide. And yet I find it in my heart to pity him, so wonderful is his love of life. One moment I am safe, respected, and beloved, the next I am the common quarry of mankind, I'm hunted, a killer of men, a slave to the gallows! And yet I find it in my heart to pity him, so wonderful is his love of life.