Title: Seahorses
Author: Shenandoah Risu
: PG
Spoilers: Season 1 "Subversion"
Word Count: around 635
Summary: The baby shower. He'd forgotten, too busy with the newest crisis on his hands.
Characters: Everett Young, Tamara Johansen
Author's Notes: Written for the LJ Comm Stargateland Writing Challenge 29: What should have been. Missing scene for "Subversion"
Disclaimer: I don't own SGU. I wouldn't know what to do with it. Now, Young... Young I'd know what to do with. ;-)
Thanks for reading! Feedback = Love. ;-)



He's on his way to the Communications Room, to bring General O'Neill on board to assist with Telford's interrogation. Passing by the mess hall he notices TJ and Chloe, hugging. On the table next to them there are a number of items, clearly cobbled together and presented with much love.

The baby shower.

He'd forgotten, too busy with the newest crisis on his hands.

He stops and catches Chloe's eye. He tilts his head, she nods, and then she leaves, kissing TJ on the cheek as she does.

He contemplates the medic for a moment.

"Hey," he says. She looks up, wiping her eyes.

He comes closer, hesitating. "I'm so sorry, I forgot all about it."

She sniffles. "It's all right, I under-… Oh my god, what did you do?"

He realizes he must be quite a mess and tries to wipe his face on his sleeve, but she waves him over, pulling a piece of cloth from her pocket.

"Spit," she says, and he obediently touches his tongue to the cloth. She wipes his chin and upper lip with practiced efficiency. "What happened?"

He sits down next to her.

"Telford got a little unruly."

She has to smile at that, despite herself.

"Rush beat you up?"

He chuckles. "I suppose, in a way he did. Too bad he doesn't know." He smiles at her, then his face turns serious.

"I'm so sorry I missed this," he gestures at the gifts. She nods. He takes her hand and looks at it for a long time.

She waits.

"TJ, if there was any way for me to take this burden from you, I would – I wish there was something I could do. It's not fair."

She watches him massaging her fingers.

"Sometimes I wish we were seahorses."

She blinks at him. "Seahorses?"

He smiles and kisses her fingertips.

"With seahorses, it's the male that gets pregnant."

Her eyes fill with tears again. "I love this child," she whispers.

"So do I." He finally looks at her face.

Silence settles between them. He sighs deeply.

"May I hold you – for a little while?" She swallows hard, then nods.

"C'mere." He straddles the bench and pulls her up to his chest. She leans against him, his hands on her arms, his cheek against the back of her head.

After a moment she squirms and reaches for his hands, gently placing them on her belly. His breath hitches. She covers his hands with hers and leans her head back onto his shoulder. His breath is shaky, and he finds himself trembling.

He closes his eyes and breathes in her scent – warm, sweet, a touch of antiseptic.

"This your first one, too?" she asks quietly.

He hesitates for a long time.

"No. Fourth."

He feels her tense up.

"Emily… she suffered three miscarriages. The last time she almost bled to death. It wasn't either one of us. We were just 'genetically incompatible', is what the doctor said."

He presses his face against her neck. She strokes the backs of his hands.

He takes a deep breath. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-"

"It's okay," she interrupts him, and he kisses her gently on the shoulder.

"I bet there are seahorses out there that wish they were people," she finally says, sitting up and turning around. He looks at her, and she squeezes his hand.

"We'll be fine. Everybody is helping me so much. I am surrounded by seahorses here."

He smiles and nods, at last.

"I gotta go."

"I know."

"Let me help you get all this stuff to your room."


He lets her load him up with toys, clothes and decorations and she tells him who made what, and he admires them all, praising the ingenuity of the crew.

And together they carry the gifts down the hall.