Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns all, I just have an unhealthy obsession, of playing with her characters. :D
Fate and Intuition
I stood in the small kitchen of my youth, phone clutched painfully in my right hand. Pacing a small path, I found myself glaring at the faded chipped yellow cabinets that Charlie never fixed. It was a symbol that he wasn't over my mother, or that he ever would be. Sighing with resignation I dialed the familiar number with inhuman speed. It rang and rang and rang, until finally his voice was on the other end.
"You've reached Jake, I'm not here, leave a message."
"Jacob... I know you're sick... I just wanted to hear your voice, so, no pressure." I mumbled into the phone, hanging it up just as I heard the front door.
I stood still with the phone still clutched in my hand as my father Charlie walked in. Letting out the breath I didn't know I was holding I tried to smile, however it came out more of a grimace.
"You okay?" Charlie asked perceptively. His dark eyebrows knitted together in concern as he hung his service belt on it's designated spot on the wall.
"Fine." I lied not meeting his gaze, "I think I'm just gonna go grab a shower." I walked backwards hanging the phone up and walking up the small rickety staircase to the small second floor of the house.
I walked into my small cramped bedroom and padded to the closet for a fresh change of clothes and grabbing my bathroom bag.
The shower water was hot, almost burning me as it cascaded down my body. The hole in my chest flaring uncomfortably. Jacob had been MIA for weeks, never returning my calls, never stopping by. Closing my eyes I leaned my head against the shower stall remembering our last conversation. "I'm broken Jake, I don't think I can ever be normal, you shouldn't waste your time with me." My weak voice reverberated in my head.
I let out a shuddering breath, "I know it hurt you when he left, but Bella, I would never ever do that."
His words were a comfort I latched onto like a life raft. It held me afloat and kept the hole from tearing open completely. That was when my decision was made, I would go to him. Stubbing my toe as I jumped to hastily out of the shower. Dressing in old sweats and a too big T-shirt I pulled my shoes on and rushed back down the stairs. Charlie was in the living room in his chair holding a beer, no surprise there.
"I'm going to see Jake." I told him urgently.
"Just be careful Bells." He told me his eyes never leaving the brilliant light of the television screen.
I climbed into my old, yet sturdy rusted red truck. Upon turning the ignition it roared up like some back alley beast. Sighing I began the drive to La Push. The whole way I was filled with such hope. The trust and love I felt for Jacob blossomed in my chest, radiating through my body with a hum. I was so lost in my thoughts and what I would say that I didn't realize I'd made it to Jake's. The rain was falling harder now, as I looked at the small house I noticed the half naked form of my best friend walking to the back.
I ran through the wet grass shouting. "Jake! Jacob. WAIT!"
Finally his form stopped, he stood still not facing me. The pain rippled along the edges of the painful hole, but I shoved it aside.
"I thought you were too sick to come outside." I blurted. Jacob turned slowly his new short hair fitting him in a way I hadn't ever imagined. His usually soft brown eyes were cold and clinical. "Or answer the phone when I call." I continued trying to keep my voice from sound too accusatory.
"Go away." He told me his tone soft but harsh.
"What? I... no... Jake I'm sorry. I'm sorry for what I said." I told him my body trembling on the verge of falling into a pit of despair.
"We can't be friends." He told me flatly not meeting my gaze.
"Does this have to do with Sam? Did Sam get to you?" I asked angrily.
"If you want to blame someone, blame those bloodsuckers you love, the Cullen's."
His words froze me. I opened my mouth to argue, but I could see on his face that he knew...
"You've been lying to everyone Bella. So a fucking leech is what a guy has to be to get near you is that it?" He asked anger coloring his tone, his eyes hard and angry.
"Save it Bella. We're done here. I'm done. How can I even look at you now? A GOD DAMN Vampire." He screamed over the loud booming of thunder.
I felt the tears sliding down my face as my best friend destroyed the little piece of my I had spent months putting back together. The elephant in the room was out, so he knew.
"Please... you're my best friend." I whimpered.
"Pathetic. You. Are. Pathetic." He spat in my face, his features no longer the boy I loved, he was no longer my personal sun.
"You promised me." I cried out reaching for him.
He pushed me back violently his expression stoic, a mask of the boy I once knew. "This is me keeping that promise, GO AWAY, or you WILL be hurt."
Without another glance my best friend ran off into the night towards 4 other figures in the tree lines. The numbness washed over me as I made it into the cab of my truck. My body shaking from the power behind the sobs escaping my throat. My chest was completely consumed by a hole that could never be filled again. I sat there taking a deep breath making up my mind. I had to start over.
With a piece of paper I wrote one short note.
I came over tonight to tell you that I loved you. That I wanted to try...
That I finally get it, that I see YOU Jacob, that I love YOU Jacob.
I won't bother you again... Tell Charlie I love him, and I'm sorry.
I left the paper on the steering wheel and walked away from the truck. I headed down the familiar path of first beach, the cliffs in the back ground were mocking me. My decision was made, the numbness pushed me forward while my brain took a backseat.
I wasn't sure how I managed up the steep climb to the top of the cliffs, especially in what could be called a torrential downpour. I stood on the edge of the cliff looking into the dark angry waters below. The waves crashing angrily against the rocks. The flash of lightening and crack of thunder brought me back to myself. I took a step back, then a another, until I tripped. I curled into the fetal position.
My emotions ranging from sadness, loneliness, despair, heartbreak, and the most predominant... anger.
I sat up setting my jaw, a scowl forming, I wasn't going to be this weak being. I was going to march right up to Jacob Black and lay all my cards out for him. Whether or not he would reciprocate was irrelevant, he deserved the truth.
I stood up and turned. The scream rose into my throat, but before I could get the noise out a cold hand wrapped neatly around my throat. Bright crimson eyes bored into me. The sadistic smile, the flaming red hair...
"Victoria." I choked not fighting her.
The anger and confusion swirled in her eyes as she took in my appearance.
"I'm here to kill you." she smiled brightly, as if discussing a new pair of shoes. "James was my mate... Vampires, we mate for life. I figure it's only fair to kill Edward's mate. Eye for an eye and all that." She smirked slowly releasing me enough so I could breath.
"Kill me then." I told her rasping the words my eyes glaring defiantly into hers.
She arched a perfect eyebrow as she considered my words, "SO, where is your perfect prince?" She asked.
"Gone. He. Left. Me." I ground out painfully, the hole consuming me in pain.
She watched my face carefully and frowned, "Why?"
Without thinking of the consequences I told her, "I wasn't good enough. He never really loved me. He wanted to move on to his 'distractions.'"
She laughed mirthlessly as she considered me. "That changes things." She whispered.
My air supply was cut off and before I could think the blackness surrounded me...
Burning my body was on fire. The flames engulfing me were white hot. I tried to move but my body was uncooperative. I was dying. I could feel it in the depths of my bones.
'Please let it end quickly.' I pleaded to myself.
"Only one day left my sweet." A chilling voice told me.
Memories flashed behind my eyes of their own accord.
Scatter- Brained Renee. She was going through a mystery book marathon. We were in the store and she kept looking around with a paranoid look on her face. Chuckling I reached out and grabbed her causing her to scream.
"Mom!" I told her looking around slightly embarrassed.
"Sorry." She blushed faintly.
"Mom. If those books do that to you... why do you read them?" I asked her.
"They're engaging Bella, honey. They open your eyes to the dangers of the world."
I laughed gently nudging her, "Alright mom."
My dad had never been the touchy feely type, but I knew he loved me. Making sure I had my truck. Fighting for me when he left. Helping me in ways I never knew until now. The subtle way he showed how he cared. My chest squeezed painfully, 'I'll never get to tell him I love him.'
My sun, the man who brought me out of the dark place into the light. The man who constantly built me up only to tear me right back down. Leveling me to the point where I was lower than low.
Emmett, Alice, Esme, Carlisle, Jasper, Rosalie... and Edward...
More pain filled me as I screamed out. Wanting the pain to end. Trying to hold the painful memories at bay... But the damn was broken every memory with them flashed crystal clear before my eyes...
I loved them. Stupidly I still loved them, craved their acceptance... needed them...
Time passed as I ticked off the seconds in my head, 252,363. Just over 70 hours...
Time seemed to go slowly as the inferno raged around me, there wouldn't be anything left... Then suddenly the pain seemed to recede. However my relief was short lived as the pain increased around my heart. It beat erratically faster, and faster and faster... then nothing.
Complete and utter silence.
Slowly I came back to myself, somewhere in the murky memories I remembered a sweet melodic voice. "Vampire... Cold Ones."
I opened my eyes and everything was different. The colors were more vibrant and I was struck by a beauty with the most luscious thick red hair I'd ever seen.
She sneered at me as she took in my appearance, "Do you remember me?"
Her words made sense but in the back of my mind... Looking through my human memories nearly seemed useless...
"Victoria!" I gasped.
Everything flooded through me once again. Everything I'd lost. Now I would be doomed to walk the earth alone. I sank to the floor feeling real tears sliding down my cheeks. They were thicker and they burned. Venom... My eyes were leaking venom...
"Well that's new." Victoria mused walking around me.
I cringed away from her, angry that she made me like her, "Why didn't you just kill me?"
"Oh Bella. I'm cursed to walk this earth without James. Now you'll be cursed to walk it with me, without Edward... which by the way I have something for you..."
Before I knew what was happening I was falling through a trap door into a dank dark room. Two men... Vampires were there they lunged and before I could attack I was chained to a wall. I yanked on the chains they didn't budge.
"I thought I would be stronger!" I screamed out.
"You are Hun, but these are special." Victoria grinned dropping gracefully in front of me.
Here is a movie I thought you might enjoy...
I turned to the television screen and I noticed members of my former family being taped. There was Rose and Emmett...
"You aren't going back to check on that human Emmett." Rose snarled.
"Me or her."
"Always you Rosie."
Alice shopping side by side with a woman with strawberry blond hair and golden eyes. Walking into a store Alice lifted a racy pair of lingerie and snickered.
"Wear these for Edward... he'll love it."
Last but not least... Edward and the woman...
"I love you Edward."
"You too Tanya."
I looked back at Victoria and a feral growl broke through my lips and I lunged. Chunks of concrete flew from the wall and I wrapped my arms around Victoria's neck and pulled her head from her body. With brute strength I ripped her limb from limb and instinctively built a fire. Tossing her head with the permanent look of surprise into the fire.
I ran from the small hut in the forest and never looked back...
That's how it all began 100 years ago...
I'm currently looking for a Beta, if anyone is interested please let me know in a PM. Thank you. :D Enjoy!