The Downfalls of Fancying Your Professor
This came to me when watching Scrubs, and JD calls Dr. Maddox a MILF, and since I was reading fanfiction and I wondered
what, or who, they would consider a MILF ... and this was born. Cracky, and short, and by far not the best I've written. Enjoy!
The first snow of the season drifted down in small tufts, enough to layer the ground in a thin blanket of white. It wasn't really enough snow for any typical snow-related activites, such as snowball fights, snowman making or snow angel making, but it still made nine-year-old Lily Potter squeal with glee as she ran towards the train station, stopping every ten or so steps to make sure her parents were right behind her.
"Lily!" Harry Potter yelled to his daughter as he walked into the train station, his wife Ginny beside him, his daughter still outside trying to catch snowflakes on her tongue. "C'mon!"
Lily ran to catch up with her parents, before going through the border at Platform Nine and Three Quarters to greet her two brothers, James and Albus, who were returning home from Hogwarts for the Christmas holidays.
Smoke seemed to hang in every particle of the air, making it hard to see through the thick fog. Indeed, it was only when James was a few feet away that Harry and Ginny saw him, and it was their daughter who saw him first.
"Mummy! It's Jamie!"
"Hey! Mum, Dad!" James called, pushing his trunk towards them before he was enveloped in hugs by his parents and his little sister.
"How are you? How's school? Studying hard?"
"School's ... school's good," James said, going off into some sort of daydream.
"Jamie? James!" Ginny asked, shaking her son's shoulder and James jumped.
"Yeah, Mum?" he replied, as if coming out of a daze.
Albus strolled up to them, carrying his trunk and his owl, Ringo. "It's because of Professor Corner."
Ginny turned to her youngest son. "What is?"
"Shut it, Al," James threatened, putting on his most meanacing voice.
Ginny glared at her eldest. "What is, Al?"
"Jamie's vacant expression," Al said, as if it were obvious. "It's because of the Divination professor. Y'know, Professor Corner. All the boys get like that. I don't. She isn't that pretty." His eleven-year old mind didn't see the part of Professor Corner that James' fourteen-year-old mind did.
Lily frowned as she clutched her father's hand. "Who's Professor Corner?"
Al looked around for a second, and suddenly smiled. "She's coming up this way."
Both Ginny and Harry looked around their children to see the elusive Professor Corner. What surprised both of them, though, was to see Cho Chang - or evidently, Cho Corner as she was now known - stroll up to them, an enchanted trunk hovered behind her. All the male students - and some of the males in general - in the near vicinity turned towards her with vacant expressions as if she was a walking cauldron of Amortentia.
"Harry, Ginny," she said, smiling , as she passed. "How are things?"
Although Harry and Cho hadn't really kept in contact after their relationship - if a few snogs really could be called a relationship - the war had brought everyone together, in a really twisted way.
"Good, thank you, Cho," Harry replied, smiling. "Yourself? Al and James were just telling us you're teaching at Hogwarts now?"
"Divination," she said airily, and smiled. James was staring at her, nearly drooling. "It's a fascinating subject. Anyway, I must be going, Michael and the kids are waiting for me at home. Merry Christmas, Albus, James," she said as she floated away, leaving four normal people and one teenage boy who looked estatic she'd spoken to him in person.
As soon as she was out of earshot, Al turned to his parents. "Jamie fancies her."
Ginny sighed, and rolled her eyes. "Oh, not another one ..."
Harry just laughed as he smiled at his son.
"Al! I totally don't fancy - hey, what do you mean, not another one?"
Ginny turned to her husband as they walked out of Kings Cross Station. "Should you tell him, or shall I?"
"Tell me what?" James asked impatiently.
Harry smiled, swinging Lily's hand as they walked. "When I was in school, I dated Cho - I mean, Professor Corner."
Albus burst out laughing as James stood still, jaw slack.
"No way," James said, recovering quickly as he shook his head in denial. "No way. My Dad could never date someone like Professor Corner. No way!"
"Oi!" both Harry and Ginny exclaimed.
"Well! She's a total MILF."
Harry and Ginny frowned. Albus chucked.
"Daddy," Lily said, tugging on her father's hand. "What's a MILF?"
"Mother I'd Like To Fu- "
"Well. She is. And Dad would never have dated her, right? I mean, she's totally hot. She would have never gone for someone like him. And I've seen pictures of Dad when he was fifteen. Scrawny is the word that comes to mind."
Harry narrowed his eyes. "Well, I did date her."
"To be honest, Harry," Ginny said, as her husband loaded the boys trunks into the back of their car, "'Date' is a pretty loose term. More like two snogs and a Hogsmeade trip."
"You snogged her! That's totally disgusting," James remarked, a disgusted look on his face that looked as if he'd just been handed flobberworms for his Sunday dinner.
"Haha! Jamie fancies someone Dad snogged! That's hilarous!" Al said as he jumped in the car behind James, still chuckling.
"Strange how your ex-girlfriend ended up marrying my ex-boyfriend, isn't it?" Ginny said, laughing as she climbed into the passenger seat, letting her husband drive.
Soon they were all loaded into the car and had set off for their home, ready to enjoy the festive season. Although, it was soon interrupted by a curious little voice.
"Mummy? Daddy? I still don't know what a MILF means ... ?"