A/N: Haha! This is just for fun! This is only one chapter, sorry! I also apologize for the fact that one sentence might be bad because I didn't know how to say it! I had to look it up on google (Jashin-sama help me!) so I might have slaughtered saying it. This came to me because I just got this book called D!RTY JAPANESE (It's slang terms) and I was like hey why not put it to good use! I also am very sorry for not updating sooner I had a horrid last week! Ask on the review if you want to know. I will try to be writing more of Hidan The Beautiful Merman soon I just didn't write more because I left my notepad in my moms car and she left to spend the night at a friends house for a night. I'm going to get it after I'm done writing this. Lastly sorry for rambling, onto the warning!

Warning: Dirty Japanese talk with English translation, Yaoi, KakuHi, and cussing!

Disclaimer: Naruto belongs to Masashi Kishimoto and D!RTY JAPANESE belongs to Matt Fargo.


Kakuzu heard they were getting a new Akatsuki member, more like a new partner for him. Kakuzu didn't think it was his fault they needed a new one. It wasn't his fault that all his partners were idiots, douche bags, and whores! They pissed him off and in turn he snapped off their head. No big deal right? Well Leader-sama just didn't feel the same way about it as Kakuzu did. He blamed him and it just wasn't fair! Kakuzu entered Peins' office. Sitting at his desk was the leader and sitting on a seat in front of the leader's desk was a young man, perhaps 22 or 23? He had shoulder length hair that was silver and slicked back, big and deep purple eyes, very pale skin, was about 5' 10, 125 pounds, had a slightly muscular build, had an anti-Yugakure head band, a red three-bladed scythe, and a pendant with an upside down triangle in a circle. If he said so himself, this young man was sexy. Kakuzu was feeling self conscious with this man around after all he did have his mask and head gear off.

"This is Hidan, he is your new partner. Hidan this is Kakuzu," Leader-sama said, actually quiet bored.

"Ki ni hottosekushi na! (Damn sexy, you hot!)" Hidan exclaimed.

"Sumimasen? (Excuse me?)" Kakuzu replied completely appalled.

"Anata mo nihongo ga hanaseru a? (You speak Japanese too?)," Hidan asked getting pink in the face, "Gomen nasai. (Sorry.)"

"Yarimakura no wa do (How 'bout if we fuck like rabbits.)" Hidan purred and winked at Kakuzu, completely forgetting about his previous embarrassment.

Kakuzu smiled at this and replied with, "Ketsu manko daisuki. (I love magina *male asshole*)"

"Isu emu yatte miyo ka? (wanna try bondage?)" Hidan said more than asked seductively and licked his lips tauntingly.

Kakuzu tackled Hidan and his chair to the floor, and started to brutally devour the purple-eyed man's lips. Leader-sama jumped out of his seat astonished and wondering what the fuck they had said to each other in Japanese.

After note: This was completely random! I had no reason to write this but to have fun! It's for the humor people, sorry! If I offended you, than you have issues that I don't want to know about. (Joking! Tell me what offended you!) If decided not to continue Hella Good by the way!

Thanks for reading my crap and please review! :D