Author's Note: Okay, so, I'm going to forewarn you now that this is in no way a fluff story. I cried as I wrote it. It was very hard for me to write, but I knew I had to end it the way I did, though I did have an alternate ending. If I get enough reviews asking to read the alternative ending, I will write it and post it.
WARNING: CHARACTER DEATH.
Disclaimer: I do not own Glee.
Blaine Anderson hasn't seen Kurt Hummel in years, a fact that he hates with all his heart. It had been seven years since they graduated High School, together and in love. But the stress of college and of life apart got to them, and they had broken it off midway through their sophomore years.
And now, he couldn't believe what he was seeing. He was in New York for work, and there he was, Kurt Hummel in the flesh, walking down the street outside the building he sat in. But it wasn't Kurt… his face shallow, his eyes dead. That wasn't the Kurt he knew.
He was about to get up and go see him was he was called into his meeting. With a sigh, he went to it.
It was a few days later that he saw him again. They passed each other on the street, Kurt's eyes still gone. He didn't notice Blaine as he passed him. Blaine wanted nothing more than to reach out and grab him.
He went to turn and call out to him, but Kurt was already lost in the crowd.
The next time was a week later. Blaine walked into a Starbucks and saw Kurt sitting in the corner, staring out the window, his drink held tightly between his hands. He looked so broken.
Blaine forgot about his coffee, deciding to take the opportunity at hand. He walked over to Kurt and froze. The boy didn't look up. It was like he was a ghost. Blaine didn't know what to do; he didn't know what to say.
"Kurt?" he asked softly, the name coming out of his lips as a question. That was when Kurt looked up. His expression didn't change. He didn't smile. He didn't frown. Blaine wished he would do something, anything. Even a glare would be better than nothing.
Kurt just stood and walked past him. Blaine turned and watched him, wanting to stop him, but he couldn't move his feet. He watched him walk to the door and right before he walked out, Kurt turned and looked at Blaine. Blaine could swear he saw tears in those once beautiful eyes.
Blaine felt his heart breaking.
He was determined to see Kurt before he had to leave the city. He needed to see him and speak to him.
Blaine had gone to that same Starbucks several days in a row, waiting and praying that Kurt would come in, but he never did. He had to be avoiding it.
But then, Blaine got lucky. He sat in the corner just waiting. That's when Kurt walked in, not noticing Blaine. Blaine silently got up and walked towards his ex boyfriend, placing his hand on the back of his shoulder lightly.
Kurt jumped at the touch and turned to look at him. His eyes were slightly wide and he looked away quickly.
"Kurt…" he said softly, moving so he could look at his face. Kurt's eyes were shut tightly, as if he could open them and everything would be gone. "Kurt, please."
"Go away, Blaine," he said, his voice stiff, dry. Blaine wanted to cry.
"I'm not going away… I've missed you…"
"Yeah, well… good for you.."
Blaine bit his lip and gently grabbed Kurt's hand. Kurt looked at him, his eyes slightly wide. Blaine looked into those beautiful blue eyes. Though they were so dead, so lost… he found himself falling back in love with the boy in front of him. "Please… just talk to me…" he said softly, desperately. Kurt stared back at him, before sighing and nodding.
Kurt wouldn't take Blaine to his apartment. Kurt wouldn't say why, but Blaine didn't pry. He had gotten his chance and he wasn't going to go mess it up. Blaine took him back to his hotel room. Kurt looked around uncomfortably, like the building was far too fancy and he was far too unworthy.
Blaine motioned for him to sit on the couch and asked him if he wanted anything to drink. Kurt shook his head as he sat down carefully on the couch. Blaine sat down beside him.
"Kurt… what happened to you?" He didn't mean to be so abrupt… he wanted to build up to it, but it had just come out. Kurt looked down, his expression broken.
"Blaine…" he whimpered. Blaine cupped his chin and forced him to look up. Kurt's eyes watered. Blaine's heart sank. He pulled Kurt into his arms and hugged him tightly. Kurt hugged him back tightly, burying his face in Blaine's shoulder.
"And that's when Ryan got mean… He started yelling and hitting and… I guess I just stopped fighting…" Kurt said softly, looking away, like letting Blaine see the weakling he truly was would make him realize how much of his time he was wasting.
It had been a couple hours of Kurt explaining his story, from the moment they had broken up to when the Kurt Blaine had once known had died. Blaine wanted to cry more than anything, but he knew he had to stay strong. He pulled Kurt's hand, which had been in his since they had released each other from their embrace, to his lips. Kurt didn't react.
"So you start dating this guy and he gets mean because you wouldn't put out?" he asked, about ready to find this Ryan guy and beat the living shit out of him.
"It wasn't just that, Blaine… I didn't put out, because it didn't feel right. None of it felt right… the only time I ever felt right was when I was with you…" he explained in a whisper. He looked up and sighed. "Blaine… I'm like a walking corpse… for the past few months I've just been… looking for a way out."
That was when the tears hit Blaine's eyes and they fell fast and hard. The man he was in love with had basically just told him he wanted to die. He shook his head as Kurt watched him.
"No, no, NO. Kurt Hummel, listen to me. You are the most… incredible person in the world and you… you can't talk about things like that. Do you know what that would do to your friends? To your father?" he asked, before taking a deep breath. "To me…"
Kurt looked into his eyes. "You didn't want me, Blaine…"
"I always wanted you. I love you, Kurt."
He kissed Kurt then. He kissed him softly, gently. Kurt froze. Blaine didn't remove his lips. He wouldn't unless Kurt pushed him off. But then… Kurt started to kiss back, lightly at first, but then more passionately as Blaine deepened the kiss.
They moved to the bedroom, their lips never leaving the others. They both had missed the feel of their lips against each other's, the gentle touches, the soft whimpers of pleasure.
Clothes were removed quickly, urgently. Blaine kissed all over Kurt's body. His skin was paler than he remembered, and he could see the outline of his ribs. The image made Blaine want to cry again.
They made love. It was slow, passionate, and terrifying in every way. Terrifying because Blaine would be leaving the city soon, and he didn't know what the future had in store for him. Kurt was terrified for other reasons.
Blaine held Kurt close, stroking his hair gently. Kurt stared at the wall, his once blank stare showing a small sign of life.
"Marry me…" Blaine whispered. He didn't care how crazy he sounded. He wanted Kurt to be his again, wanted to have the life with him they had always dreamed of. He looked down at Kurt for his response.
Kurt didn't respond. He waited until Blaine was asleep, then he gathered his clothes together and left.
Blaine left New York, broken. When he woke up, Kurt was gone. No note, no nothing. The only reminder that anything happened was Blaine's memory of what happened and even that seemed to be too much like a dream.
And after many attempts to find him, he came up empty. It was like his encounter with Kurt had never even happened.
Three months later, Blaine got a call as he was walking out of a meeting. He didn't recognize the number, except for the fact that it was an Ohio area code. "Hello?" he answered.
"Blaine?" It was Burt Hummel, Blaine would recognize that voice anywhere.
"Mr. Hummel?" he asked. Burt sighed sadly. Blaine bit his lip. "What is it?"
"Kurt's dead, son."
He had been sick. He had been sick and he didn't even mention it to Blaine. He had some terminal illness with a name that Blaine couldn't pronounce. He had spilled everything… everything except that.
Blaine was surprised at the lack of guests to Kurt's funeral. His family was there, obviously, along with the original members of New Directions. They nodded to him, and Finn clapped him on the shoulder.
He stood strong through the service. He stared at the picture of him they had… it was such a beautiful picture. He was younger and he looked so alive… It was a picture Blaine had taken.
It was when they were lowering the casket into the ground that Blaine broke down. Tears fell from his eyes faster and harder than ever before. He wanted to jump in and open the casket, hoping he was still alive. But it wasn't going to happen.
He had just gotten to his car when Burt came up to him. His eyes were red and his cheeks were tear stained. Blaine had never seen Burt Hummel like that.
"Didn't think I'd ever have to bury my wife and my son.." he muttered. Blaine just stared at him. Burt sighed and scratched the back of his head, before looking Blaine in the eyes. "He loved you, Blaine. He loved you more than anything. And while it might not seem like it… he had a happy ending, because he knew that you loved him."
Blaine just cried and nodded. "Thank you, sir." He couldn't say anything more. Burt pulled Blaine into a tight hug, which Blaine returned. Once the embrace ended, they nodded to each other and went their separate ways.
Blaine went back to Kurt's grave a few hours later. He stared down at it and wiped his eyes with the back of his hand.
"Oh simple thing… where have you gone…" he muttered, before looking up at the sky.
He closed his eyes, feeling the wind whip gently around him. He thought back on the life he had shared with Kurt. It had been amazing… down to the very end.
He looked around and pulled a single red rose out from his jacket. He kneeled down and threw the rose into the grave, tears falling once again as he did. "We'll be together again, Kurt… somewhere only we know.." he whispered.
He stood, took one last look. Kurt Hummel. Beloved Son. Amazing Soul.
The only person Blaine Anderson would ever love.