Disclaimer: Naruto solely belongs to Kishimoto, Masashi-san (although Sasuke might debate this and claim Naruto all for himself). Also, The Princess and the Pea does not belong to me and is written by the great Hans Christian Andersen. Childhood memories ftw.
Summary: Naruto plays a prank on Sasuke after reading a children's story. The outcome isn't exactly what he expected it to be. SasuNaru
Warning: This is a Sasuke x Naruto fiction, aka a boy on boy relationship. If you are offended by this, I suggest clicking the back button. Not Worksafe aka there is material inappropriate for minors, such as language and adult-content, hence the rating. Read at your own risk.

Note: No actual peas were hurt during the making of this oneshot :D And much thanks to Riuolo my beta! She's doing such a wonderful job!
P.S. Easier-to-read formatting can be found via my personal fanfiction blog; the link can be found on my profile! :) Enjoy!


The Prince and the Pea


"Only a real princess would be so sensitive!" cried Naruto, as his words grabbed the attention of the children gathered around him. Several years had passed since the Great Ninja War and with Sasuke's retrieval mission ending in success, time had found Naruto, the current Rokudaime Hokage of Konohagakure, before a small group of children in the ninja academy's daytime program. He had always loved children and enjoyed feeding their creative minds with classic stories and whenever he had the opportunity, would race to the academy to read to the children. Today's pick was The Princess and the Pea by Hans Christian Anderson.

"The happy prince married her and the pea was put on exhibition at the royal museum, where you can go see it, if it hasn't been stolen. And that, children, was a true story," he ended, closing the book with his last words. He mentally snickered at the idea of a measly pea bruising a person, and beneath forty layers of mattresses and quilts no less! He looked around at the children and saw their eyes wide with wonder. He could only imagine the gears turning in their heads, before an intelligent child cried out his disbelief.

"That's stupid. How can you feel a pea under that many beds?" the boy said, crossing his arms. A stern, doubtful look settled on his facial features. Azure eyes carefully gazed at the child and noted the color of his irises, so light that they were nearly transparent and blended in with the whites of the rest of his eyes; a trait of the Hyuuga-clan, no doubt.

"Well, er…"

"Hiroki. Hyuuga, Hiroki."

"Right, Hiroki," Naruto resumed, embarrassed that he didn't know the name of the child but mentally patting himself on the back for making the (quite obvious) connection. "Well, in the book it says only royalty had sensitive skin, so I guess you and I wouldn't know if a pea was under one mattress unless we were royalty, now would we?" He saw the quick flicker of hesitation in the child's eyes and grinned; children were so naïve.

"The only way we would know is if we asked someone from royalty, like a king or queen. The feudal lords don't count," Naruto continued, seeing the Hyuuga child's doubt deflate. He sat back down before the cries of other children joined in with his own.

"That's right! Hokage-sama, we should have a class trip to a kingdom and ask a princess if she could feel a pea under her mattress!"

"No, we can't ask her that! We have to find out ourselves and put the pea there without telling her so we can know if she really turns black and blue or not!"

The group grew rowdy and Naruto chuckled to himself, allowing himself to be the background man in their enthusiasm to test the book's pea myth. Maybe it had been the lack of love he had received as a child, but Naruto always loved children; he loved to give them his attention, feed their imagination, and shower them with all his love, especially because he had none of his own. At this, his eyes went slightly out of focus before he shook himself out of the on-coming daze. Shame on him for thinking such negative thoughts! He would never trade his relationship with his lover in the world…

Even though having a child of their own would be nice.

"Hokage-sama?" came a wondering voice. Immediately, Naruto was drawn out of his thoughts and he met the multiple gazes that were looking at him curiously.

"Ah, sorry. So, what did you guys decide to do if this trip were to happen?" he asked them and they all immediately ambushed him with their grins.

"We decided to cut a pea in fourths and put a quarter of a pea under the princess's bed!" At this, Naruto raised a brow.

"Yeah, because we don't have twenty mattresses—" explained Hiroki.

"Or feathered quilts!"

"Or feathered quilts." Hiroki nodded, before continuing. "Because we don't have the necessary material, we decided that cutting up the pea into a smaller size would truly determine if the myth were true or not. Although the math doesn't add up, we can't really cut a pea smaller than a quarter of its size, so we're going with that." Naruto nodded, 'hmm'-ing at their conclusion before he grinned his trademark fox-like grin.

"You kids are so smart, coming up with this kind of plan! Let me tell you, when I was your age all I did was go around pulling pranks on Iruka-sensei—"

"Hokage-sama, you're getting off track!" the children unanimously shouted, a few of them rolling their eyes. They had heard stories about a mischievous young Hokage-sama from several people; teachers, the hokages (including the one mentioned), their parents…They really didn't need to hear it again.

Naruto smiled sheepishly, scratching the back of his head. "Right, right. Well about that plan of yours…" he started, looking around to make sure he had everyone's attention. He saw all the kids lean forward, straining their ears as he lowered his voice to ignite the anticipation that was surely coursing through their veins at this very moment. He took a deep breath.

"We can't do it."

"Ehhhh?" came their shrieks. Naruto winced, despite bracing himself for the barrage of screeches that would make his ears bleed; never underestimate the vocal chords of pubescent children.

"Hokage-sama, you liar!" "What, why can't we do it?" "You said we were going to go on a trip!" Naruto waved his hands in front of the agitated children to attempt to calm their nerves, quieting them enough for him to get another opportunity to speak.

"I said if this trip were to happen. A lot of things have to be done for this trip to take place, but you can't just go pulling this prank on a princess. You guys can be arrested for endangerment, you know." Again, he was met with fierce opposition. Goodness, if he kept this up, he would be thrown out of his position as the leader of the village before someone could say Ichiraku ramen.

"It's not a prank!"

"That's right, it's an experiment to see if she's really royalty or not!"

"Or an experiment to see if this book was really true!" Naruto face-palmed. As much as he loved children, he sometimes regretted feeding their minds too much. He couldn't see a way out of this one and hopefully delaying it continuously would eventually lead to them forgetting about this incident all together.

"Alright, alright," he muttered. "I'll do my best to try and work things out with the academy, the council, and your parents. But no promises on your pea plan, okay? I can't have you guys risking my job." His words went ignored as the children jumped in triumph before the bell rang, signaling the end of their free time with the Hokage. Naruto stood up from the stool and brushed the imaginary dust off his pants before making his way to the door to greet his former teacher.

"Iruka-sensei, I think you'll need some time to get these kids to unwind. Give my regards to Kakashi-sensei!" he said with a wave before making a quick hand motion and disappearing in a cloud of smoke.

The teacher only stared at the spot where his former student stood, wondering at what exactly happened before he heard the ruckus.

"Iruka-sensei! We're going on a trip to see a princess!" "And we're going to put a pea under her bed!" "What if she turns out to be a phony?" Auburn eyes looked at the rowdy group of children before coming across a copy of The Princess and the Pea lying on the floor and he could feel a vein pop up at the side of his temple as his blood pressure rose.

I am never letting Naruto read anything to these kids again, Iruka thought viciously as he attempted to quiet the adolescents, grabbing the discarded book from the floor and preparing for the lesson in vain. Feeding their minds with nonsense, I can never teach them anything after he visits. The future of Konoha is doomed.


Chirps of crickets filled the air as the sun began to set. Naruto whistled along with the insects as he walked towards his home, groceries in hand. He opened the door to his home and set the bags on the table before taking off his robe and massaging his shoulders. After rotating his joints until he heard a satisfying pop, he stretched and proceeded to take his groceries out of the plastic bags and heated a pot full of water for tea. Sasuke was coming home a bit late tonight and immediately the cheerful grin on Naruto's face disappeared into a sullen look. He had been eating many of his dinners alone this month and to be honest…

He felt a bit lonely.

The pot began to whistle as the water inside boiled viciously. On his way to turn off the stovetop, he accidentally bumped into the table. Behind him, he heard a package fall followed by a hissing sound, similar to that of marbles being spilled all over the floor. Sighing heavily, he turned to brace himself for the mess he made only to see his kitchen floor covered with an ocean of round green peas.

Cursing, he created several shadow clones and ordered them to help him pick up the mess, to which they all complied. The multiple Narutos all squatted as they took to their bothersome task, one muttering at how much of an idiot the original was (to which the original angrily punched his clone into oblivion as a response). The blond regained his composure and picked up a single pea and placing it into a bowl before picking up another, observing it silently. Then suddenly a wicked grin graced his features as a plan struck him like lightning. He looked up to see all of his clones wearing similar looks of craftiness. They turned to him and their gazes locked. Immediately, they all started to snicker before laughing haughtily. Just because he was Hokage didn't mean he had given up pulling pranks.

Uzumaki, Naruto – number one prankster of Konoha – was back in action.


Heavy sighs escaped the man as he opened the door to his home, slightly disappointed that the lights were turned off. He bee-lined for the bathroom to wash off the scent of sweat and blood before dressing for bed. The man then slowly made his way into his shared bedroom and lifted the covers carefully so as to not wake his sleeping lover. He held his breath as the other shifted in their sleep and cursed himself for failing to be quiet and stealthy – qualities that all ninjas, especially one as high-ranking as he, must have.

"Sasuke, you're home?" He heard his lover question, slurred heavily by sleep. The Uchiha settled himself next to his lover, shifting until he found a comfortable position and planted a kiss on the blond's temple.

"I'm home, Naruto." He saw a sleepy smile as his lover attempted to blink some of the drowsiness away.

"Welcome home, Sasuke. How was the mission?"

Sasuke pulled Naruto closer to him and rested his chin atop the blond's head, breathing in deeply to take in the musk scent that was just purely Naruto. "Tiring, but it's fine. I'm home now so I'm all better." Naruto smiled, leaving light kisses on his lover's exposed collarbone.

"I'm glad you're home; I was getting lonely," he muttered. The blond felt the arms around him squeeze, almost in reassurance.

"Sorry. How was your day?" Naruto smiled and recalled the episode he had with the children and their plans. He rested his cheek on Sasuke's chest, enjoying the way his lover's body vibrated as the man chuckled out of amusement.

"I seriously worry for Konoha's future; you need to stop encouraging them especially if they're unable to carry out their plans." The blond pouted and shifted to look up into Sasuke's eyes, blowing lightly into the other's face to annoy his lover. It worked.

"Stop that."

Naruto grinned cheekily. "Stop what? Blowing air into your face or feeding the kids' imagination?"

"Both, you idiot." Naruto resumed his position and placed his cheek against Sasuke's chest once again, taking in a deep breath. He missed this smell, he missed this warmth, he missed Sasuke.

"It's fine. They need to start somewhere, right? Everyone has dreams and, big or small, I'm going to do my best to help them. And don't worry, Konoha's future is bright. I'm the Hokage after all, aren't I?"

"That's exactly why I doubt it – Ouch!" Sasuke glowered down at his lover as the blond sent him a mischievous look; Naruto, growing irritated at Sasuke's word, bit him and was happily satisfied at the patch of skin that was turning red just under the Uchiha's collarbone.

"What are you, a dog?"

"No, I'm your awesome, amazing lover Uzumaki, Naruto-sama," he retorted, smiling. He turned to his other side so that his back met with Sasuke's chest and sighed in content as the other wrapped his arms around him.

"Naruto, are you okay?" He heard Sasuke ask hesitantly. Naruto used all his strength to not tense; he was just being a little childish. Sasuke would surely laugh.

"I'm fine, just a little lonely. I was looking at the kids and I couldn't help but wonder what our life would be like if I had been a girl and was able to give birth." He felt another squeeze from Sasuke and felt the man bury his face into his hair. Naruto laughed a little at the ticklish sensation.

"Do you regret us?"

Immediately, Naruto turned his head back, his eyes wide as he met with Sasuke's steady gaze. Azure eyes softened and he quickly pecked his lover on the lips, before the lips met again and again and again. They parted and a light rose color was dusted upon the blond's whiskered cheeks before he faced the window again.

"I have never – will never – regret us, Sasuke. I would never give you up for anything," he said quietly, entwining his hand with Sasuke's. He felt lips on the back of his neck and suppressed a shudder; God, just the slightest of touches would turn him on.

"Good, because even if you did, I'll make sure you never escape." Naruto could just hear the smugness in his lover's voice and laughed, his eyes growing heavy with sleep.

"I'm tired. Night, Sasuke." Another kiss, this time in his hair.

"Good night, Naruto." Azure eyes gazed out towards the window, a sly smirk crossing the once tired features before they closed in sleep.


It was when the sun's rays hit his face that Naruto blinked before sitting up, stretching out his body as he yawned. He patted next to him only for his hand to meet a cold, empty space. He turned to see the spot that his lover previously occupied empty.

"Sasuke?" Naruto called out, shuddering as his bare feet met with the cold, wooden floor. He searched mindlessly for his slippers before making his way out of the bedroom only for the scent of frying eggs to hit his nose. He patted his stomach quietly as it growled on cue.

"Sasuke?" he called out again and smiled as he saw the man peek his head from around a corner, sending him the trademark smirk.

"Morning, Naruto. Sleep well?" he asked before heading back into the kitchen. Naruto walked into the room where Sasuke was preparing them breakfast, sitting down before answering.

"I slept fine, but what about you? You usually sleep in a little bit after a late mission," he asked, silencing a voice that began to sound itself in the back of his head. It couldn't be...

"Hn, more or less. I couldn't really sleep so I decided to just get up and make breakfast; besides, your cooking stinks." Immediately, Naruto sent the other a glare.

"Bastard, my cooking is just fine, thank you very much! It's edible and I've been taking lessons from Iruka-sensei–"

"And it's also very high in sodium. I feel like I'm going to have a heart attack every time I bite into your tamago," the Uchiha interrupted, his smirk becoming more prominent as he saw the blond bristle in annoyance.

"Hey, I happen to like my rolled eggs salty! Just because your taste is plain and boring doesn't mean I have to eat everything plain and boring, too," Naruto muttered, crossing his arms and looking away. He heard a plate being set before him and then felt a kiss to his cheek. He turned to meet Sasuke's gaze and flushed, turning away again. Damn Sasuke and his stupid pheromones.

"Naruto." The said blond turned hastily.

"Wha–" He was silenced by a deep kiss and the two parted, a bridge of saliva connecting their lips before Naruto raised a hand to erase the trail, his face completely red. "Stupid Sasuke," he muttered before turning to his eggs and eating them with the prepared rice. The Uchiha smirked and turned off the vent above the stove before sitting in front of his lover at the table. They were encased in a comfortable silence and Naruto poked at his eggs, the voice in the back of his head returning and nagging him repeatedly. He sighed and put his chopsticks down, giving in to curiosity.

"So, uh, Sasuke…You said you couldn't sleep very well?" He glanced up to see the said man look at him curiously, continuing to munch on their morning meal.

"Hn, I wouldn't say that I couldn't sleep well, but more like I felt restless. My body didn't feel comfortable, but it's probably due to sore muscles or a buildup of lactic acid." The last few words completely flew over Naruto's head, but he had the gist of what his lover meant to continue probing.

"Did…did it feel like you couldn't sleep because something was bothering you?" Their gazes met once again before Sasuke looked up at the ceiling, trying to find the right words to describe his restlessness.

"Since you put it that way, I guess." He shrugged and resumed eating, not really paying attention to his lover's curiosity. He's had sleepless nights before, so it wasn't much of a big deal. Across the table, Naruto had stopped his motions completely as his mind started to slowly put two-and-two together. His blank gaze suddenly turned into a devious look and he resumed eating.

He wouldn't say anything to Sasuke yet, because he wasn't completely sure. But if things were heading in the direction Naruto thought it was heading, then many more restless nights were to come. He couldn't help the snicker that escaped his lips as he resumed eating, not seeing the curious glance that was sent his way. Sasuke looked up from his meal to see the blond laugh to himself quietly, a mischievous grin covering his face, and mentally sighed. He sometimes questioned his, and his lover's, sanity; his lover, who occasionally seemed to have internal conversations with himself, and for the idiot Uchiha who had fallen in love with the dunce. Sasuke looked towards Naruto once again as the laughs calmed into chuckles and felt sorry for whoever crossed paths with the blond that morning; Iruka was right.

Konoha's future was doomed.


Breakfast finished and dishes cleaned, Naruto parted ways with Sasuke and made his way down the main streets of Konoha. He inhaled deeply, taking in the fresh morning air and gave a loud yawn, stretching his limbs. He looked at the passing clouds in the sky and gave a big smile.

Today was going to be a great day.

The day was still early and instead of taking the usual way into his office, Naruto opted to enter via the office window. As he climbed through, he heard a knock on the door and quickly scrambled to the chair behind his desk. He smoothed out any wrinkles and sat calmly, hands folded upon the mahogany furniture.

"Hokage-sama?" The said man paled as he recognized the voice as Haruno, Sakura's. He contemplated on leaving his office, not expecting his first victim to be the deadly medic-nin. He'd rather be alive than dead, thank you very much.

"Hokage-sama? Hoka-ugh, Naruto I'm just going to come in, all right?" He heard the door knob turn and the hinges creak as the door opened and first thought of how he needed to oil the rusty hinges. Then, he made a mental countdown. Five, four, three, tw–


A sound similar to falling marbles echoed through the room as the door fully opened and the office floor was now covered in an ocean of round, green peas. Emerald eyes narrowed and sent a vicious glare towards a doe-eyed blond, who looked similar to a deer caught in head lights. Except, this 'deer' had an open mouth resembling that of a trout.

"Sa-Sakura-chan! Good morning, you're early today!" said the blond, his voice cracking due to nervousness. Slowly, the medic-nin approached the desk, her steps sounding like thunder to Naruto's ears.

"Na-ru-to," Sakura growled menacingly, pulling her sleeves up in preparation for an act of violence, no doubt. Naruto, in an act of defense, pulled his arms before him, his hands covering his face as he let out a rather feminine squeal of fright.

"Sakura, an act of violence against the hokage is treason!" cried the blond and he closed his eyes, bracing himself for the painful punch that was sure to come. However, nothing happened and Naruto cautiously lowered his raised limbs. He peeked between his hands to see the woman before him staring at him menacingly, arms at her side. She took a deep breath as her body shook with anger before she showed a rather forced smile.

"Forgive me, Hokage-sama. Here are the papers you need to go over today." And before Naruto could blink, a large stack of documents were slammed on to the desk. He jumped in alarm and watched his friend turn and leave, pausing at the door.

"You better watch your back, Naruto. I'll be decent enough to not attack you in your own office." Sakura gave the said blond a chilling smile that sent shivers down his spine before leaving the room. The blond gave a heavy sigh and slumped back into his chair, wearily looking at the peas that covered the floor of the office. He hasn't expected that Sakura would be the first person to step into his office today. He had his hopes on Konohamaru or Kiba; he had even purposely delayed his scheduled meetings with some of the female shinobi to avoid an outcome like this. Women, especially the likes of Sakura and Tsunade, were rather, for the lack of a better term, scary. Naruto pinched the bridge of his nose as he felt a massive headache coming on, more from trying to figure out ways to avoid the young medic-nin than at the task of finishing his large workload.

The women in his life were psychotic.


It was a few hours later that Naruto leaned back in his chair once again, whistling in satisfaction. He had just completed the pile of documents that had been given to him and managed to avoid the green-eyed medic nin for the day.

Life was good.

"Naruto-nii!" The door slammed open and the blond looked to see Konohamaru in his Chūnin gear holding a large bento box. "Let's eat, let's eat!"

The blond chuckled and quickly put the papers in a box labeled 'Finished' beside his desk, making room as his friend pulled a chair to the wooden furniture. "What's for lunch today, Konohamaru?" The teen made an interesting face before unwrapping the bento boxes and Naruto couldn't help the snort that escaped him as he peered at the lunch box's contents. It wasn't unusual, as far as lunches go, but what was interesting was that there was an overload of a certain green vegetable. That's right.


They were in the tamago along with sliced scallions (to which Naruto blanched; he liked his rolled eggs simple and salty) and there was also a small scoop steamed, sitting innocently next to salad. Some were even in the salad and he heard Konohamaru sigh heavily. He raised his head, his gaze curious.

"You like peas?" Dark eyes narrowed at the amusement in the hokage's voice and he couldn't help but flush, more in embarrassment than in anger.

"I don't mind them, but last night I woke up with a bag of peas on my forehead. I don't know how they got there and my mom said she didn't buy any, but since we had them, she used them in our meals recently to get rid of them. She's overdone it a bit though, because the stupid vegetables have been in everything I've eaten today, except for the rice."

"Are you sure about that?" retorted the blond as he pointed at the rice that was uncovered last. Indeed, the steamed rice had specs of green mixed in and Konohamaru sighed for the umpteenth time that day. This would be an excellent way to get any person to get tired of a certain food so quickly. He groaned.

The blond snickered; his plan was going much better than expected, save for the mishap in the morning. He looked at the drained youth before him and, again, curiosity won him over.

"How did you sleep last night, Konohamaru?" He saw brown eyes peer at him, questioning him with a steady gaze.

"Fine-actually better than I have in a while, aside from nearly being suffocated by a bag of peas." Naruto nodded, thinking to himself quietly. Then, perhaps the incident with Sasuke this morning was just a coincidence? "Why do you ask, Naruto-nii? Do I look tired?"

The blond shook his head in a negative and grinned. "Nah, I was just curious. Let's get back to eating our green lunch!" he said playfully and watched with glee as Konohamaru slumped at the reminder of their pea-filled meal. Naruto helped himself, digging in and mentally noting how despite the pea overload, everything was still rather tasty.

"Konohamaru, give my regards to your mother for lunch today." He was met with another sigh from the younger male and they continued to eat in silence.


A couple of hours later, Naruto was making his way back home. He pulled his cloak closer around him as he shuddered; the temperature had dropped rather drastically as evening fell causing the blond quickened his pace. He didn't appreciate the cold or any extreme temperatures, for that matter.

He felt the familiar tingling sensation as his cold appendages began to regain warmth once he stepped inside his home. Rubbing his hands together in hope that the friction would quicken the spread of heat, he made his way into the kitchen to prepare for dinner. He hung up his cloak and checked the cabinets and the fridge, his eyes landing on an innocent bag of peas. He paused, contemplating before quickly shaking his head and reached for the package of tomatoes and meat behind the bag of vegetables. Sasuke was coming home in time for dinner today, so the meal needed to consist of tomatoes. Deciding on a simple beef, tomato, and onion stir fry as the entrée, he prepared the rice in the cooker. He looked absentmindedly at the oil spread around the frying pan as he waited it for heat and his mind wandered to other things.

Who else would be safe to prank?

Blond brows furrowed as their owner thought carefully, placing the slices of meat on to the frying pan before adding two tablespoons of soy sauce. He needed to be careful of how he would carry out his morning prank from now on; he didn't want another Sakura-incident, that was for sure.

He perked as he heard the click of the front door and smiled as his lover's voice carried through the air.

"Idiot, I'm home." Slightly annoyed with the choice of pet name, Naruto remained in front of the stove as an act of spite and felt two arms wrap around his midsection. "No welcome home kiss?"

The blond shuddered as the voice whispered seductively into his ear and resisted the urge to turn as light kisses were being placed on his neck. He concentrated on the task before him, adding in the onions and tomatoes with additional dashes of soy sauce, pepper, garlic, and a dash of sugar.

"Tomato and onion stir fry today?" Naruto could only nod. He felt another kiss upon the base of his neck before the arms removed themselves. Despite his act of rebellion, the blond felt empty as his lover's presence left the room and he sighed. Naruto, stop being a stubborn moron and greet your lover happily. This is the first time you've had dinner together in a week!

Determined with a fixed attitude, he greeted the Uchiha properly as the other came back into the kitchen.

"Welcome home, Sasuke." He saw the said man smirk and his eye twitched before his lips were enveloped in a chaste kiss. They parted and Naruto breathlessly watched his lover retrieve dishes and silverware from the cabinets to prepare the table.

"—Naruto." Snapping out of his daze, the said man quickly shook his head before turning back to Sasuke.

"You said something, Sasuke?" The other merely pointed to the stove that Naruto was at.

"The stir fry is starting to burn." Alarmed, he turned to the stove and indeed started to see some of the onions turn dark as they reached their limit. He quickly stirred them, lifting the pan from its heat source. Relieved to see that it was just some coatings of the onions that were blackened, he lowered the pan back to the stove and stirred for a few more minutes before turning off the fire. He brought the dish to the table and they both ate comfortably, making idle chatter (more so Naruto than Sasuke).

After an hour, Naruto stood and gathered the dishes, Sasuke helping him and they both made their way to the sink. The blond found himself in a position similar to earlier as the Uchiha's arms found their way around his waist. He gripped tightly on to a dish that was about to slip from his hands as his lover's hands made their way inside his shirt, leaving trails of kisses upon his neck and exposed shoulder blade.

"Sasuke, stop it. I can't concentra-ha…I can't concentrate," whispered Naruto, struggling to get the words out. He shuddered and dropped the plate he was holding into the sink as Sasuke's fingers flicked a nipple. His lover began to nibble on his ear and he felt his legs part as the Uchiha placed his leg between them. "Bastard, I'm-ngh-I'm going to brea-ah-break the dishes."

One pale arm removed itself from beneath the blond's shirt and, in one swift motion, lifted the hokage. Before he could retort, Naruto found his breath being stolen as Sasuke captured him in a deep kiss, their tongues meeting in a lust-filled craze. They parted briefly as the dark-haired man moved his lips against his lovers in a quiet request.

Let's move to the bed.

Naruto couldn't resist and moments later, he felt himself being lowered to their bed. He wrapped his arms around Sasuke's neck, drawing the other into another deep kiss as the Uchiha worked to remove all of the blond's clothing. The dishes could wait until the morning.


Hours later, Sasuke had been to the training ground, taken a shower, and finished his reports for his completed missions this week. He settled himself in a comfortable kitchen chair and poured a cup of oolong tea. There were times were he had restless nights, but it wasn't the fact that he couldn't sleep that was the problem.

It was because something was preventing him from sleeping.

He took a sip of his tea before putting it down, thinking back to his intimate session with Naruto. Everything had gone well until he asked Naruto to ride him. When the blond complied, no matter how enticing he looked, Sasuke couldn't concentrate on the view. It felt as if there was something poking his back, and so (regretfully) he finished quickly with his lover, a little rougher than usual. He kissed Naruto to sleep as an apology before patting down his side of the bed to flatten it out. He couldn't find anything, so he nestled against his lover, but once again that irritating feeling returned. He repeated the motion of flattening out the bed before resting only to repeat the motion again a few minutes later. And he repeated it again and again and again.

Annoyed that whatever was irritating him was interrupting his sexual life and his sleep, he had quickly formed a genjutsu release motion with his hands, but found nothing wrong with his room. So, he proceeded into the kitchen to pass the time and be somewhat fruitful.

And that was how Naruto found him, glowering at all the objects in their kitchen while sipping his oolong tea.

Naruto sat at the table with his lover, pouring a glass of tea for himself. He sipped it thoughtfully. He could feel the anger radiate off his lover and wondered if it was related to their rough session last night.

"So, how'd you sleep last night?" he asked nonchalantly. Immediately, he was greeted with the famous Uchiha glare and looked away. He stood up and walked to the counter, setting his cup in the sink before walking to the door. "Geez, someone didn't get their beauty sleep last night." He quickly closed the door behind him as he exited his home, avoiding whatever had been thrown at his head. He heard a loud crash as the object collided with the door and wondered what Sasuke had shattered. He leaned against the door for a couple of moments, listening to the shards of whatever his lover had broken fall to the floor before walking to the Hokage tower. He huffed, blowing some hair out of his eyes.

"Prissy bastard."


In a few moments, Naruto experienced a case of déjà vu and watched, in what seemed like slow motion, as the bucket of peas fell atop Sakura's head.


He didn't need to look at her to know that she was glaring as the hair on the back of his neck started to rise. "Sa-Sakura-chan! You need to stop coming in so early when you're not scheduled to come in until much later." He narrowly avoided the deadly punch that was aimed for his head and escaped through the window.

"NARUTO, GET BACK HERE!" Birds that were resting on the wires of the nearby telephone poles fled as the medic-nin's outraged cry shattered the peaceful morning in

Konoha. People looked up as they saw the shadow of their hokage blaze past them and sighed. Indeed, their leader was the number one surprising ninja of Konoha.

Settling down near his old training grounds, Naruto sat atop a beaten post as he observed the recently graduated genin train with their mentors. He thought back to his prank this morning and couldn't believe at how sour his luck was already; first with Sasuke's foul mood and then a repeat of yesterday morning. It would be a smart thing to not return to the office for today. Grinning as he declared that today was a day off, the blond jumped to the ground and walked around the grounds, waving at the young ninjas who noticed his presence. This place really brought back memories.

He approached the memorial clearing to see the familiar back of his former sensei and leered over his shoulder quietly.

"Naruto, it's not good to peek over one's shoulder as they're mourning the dead." Alarmed, the blond took a few steps back, hands raised in a defensive position. He observed as the jōnin clapped his hands together and bowed before meeting his gaze. "So, what can I help you with?"

Naruto scratched the back of his head, not really having a purpose for approaching his former teacher before he remembered something.

"Ah, Kakashi-sensei, did you sleep well last night?" The blond immediately regretted asking the question as a perverted leer replaced the neutral look on the older man's face. He unconsciously took a few steps back. Why were all of his mentors such perverts?

"Well, if you must know, I slept quite well. Iruka-chan can be such a sex fiend and his body is so lewd, always asking for more. I always get worn out because we always go for 3 or 4 rounds and his lips are so enti-"

"OKAY, okay! That's enough, Kakashi-sensei! I don't want to hear the rest!" Naruto said as he covered his ears, but the damage was already done. His mind swirled as he couldn't help but imagine a lustful gaze on his academy-teacher's face as he begged for Kakashi for more and promptly slammed his head against the closest tree. Fucking perverted mentors, I hate them all.


Death seemed to loom near as Kiba woke up struggling for air. He coughed and gasped for oxygen only to feel his nose plug and uncouthly blew his nose into his hand. A disgusting pop sound was heard and Akamaru approached him, whining.

"Wait a minute, Akamaru." Kiba inhaled deeply for a couple of minutes, refilling his deprived lungs before checking what exactly was blocking his airway. On the floor besides Akamaru were two snot-covered peas and the man cringed. There were fucking vegetables in my nose? He looked around for any clues, not knowing how the offending peas made it into his room (much less his nose) before Akamaru started to whine again.

"What is it?" he asked, slightly peeved. Carefully, Kiba listened before sitting up and followed the dog to his food bowl. True to the canine's words, it was filled with peas.

"What the hell is all of this?" Slightly alarmed that his room was being taken over with the foul green vegetable, he looked in every crack for more. With the help of Akamaru, they gathered up a good handful of the peas and Kiba sat down, crossing his arms and legs as he thought to himself. How did someone get all of this in here without my knowing? Off to the side, Akamaru barked and the man grew even more flustered. No scent trails? How is that possible? Quickly he got up and opened his door, only to be swallowed in a shower of green peas.

Yip, yip! Kiba turned to the dog, vein popping on the side of his temple as his friend sat laughing at him. "Shut up, Akamaru!" he shouted before stomping through the hallway into the kitchen, where his sister was preparing lunch.

"Aneue! Do you know who the fuck put all these green things in my room?" he shouted, holding a fistful of the offending vegetables. His sister looked at him blankly, staring at them before walking towards him. Kiba watched as his sister stared into his hand and took the peas from him before returning to the kitchen counter. She put them in a bowl before walking back, mussing her brother's hair. Two pairs of dark eyes watched as green round beans fell from the male's head and he grit his teeth, flushed with embarrassment. He could feel his eye twitching as his sister just smiled before turning away.

"No idea, Kiba." He could hear the laughter in her voice and grew more annoyed.

"Stop lying, you do know who it is! You're laughing!" She looked back at him, a brow raised.

"I can't laugh at funny things? Besides, I'm not childish enough to do something like this." With those final words, she went back to preparing lunch and Kiba's anger deflated. He grabbed the nearest chair and slouched into it, Akamaru coming to his side and rubbing his head against his thigh. He petted his friend, the motion reassuring them both, and sighed.

He was going to find whoever did this and exact revenge upon them.

Naruto sneezed and rubbed his arms, pausing as he looked to the sky. Maybe someone was talking about him? He shrugged and began to walk in the direction of the academy. It was time for him to read to the children again and he couldn't wait! Titles of story books were floating around in his head before a voice brought him out of his thoughts.

"Oi, Naruto!" The said man turned towards the source and found a tired looking Shikamaru waving at him before yawning. The blond waited as the shadow-nin approached him and grinned.

"Yo, Shikamaru! What's up?" He watched the other shrug and the two resumed walking, both towards the academy. "Have something you need to do at the academy?"

The shadow-nin shrugged again, giving a large sigh before responding. "Iruka-san asked me to evaluate some of the future genin-class today. Their final exams are coming up, so we're starting to pair them off now and he wanted my opinion on the teams. It's so damn troublesome." Naruto snickered, his eyes not wavering from the street. Shikamaru, don't ever change.

They both walked, chatting idly about random things before Naruto remembered something.

"Ah, Shikamaru, I need to ask you something. How have you been sleeping?" The shadow-nin gazed at the blond and Naruto began to feel nervous, hoping that the expression on his face wasn't suspicious.

"Fine," came the curt response. The hokage blinked and responded with a simple, "Oh" and they both continued their walk in utter silence.

If this wasn't an awkward situation, Naruto didn't know what was.

They parted ways a few moments later only for Naruto to find out that his story telling time with the children was cancelled due to their trip to the Konoha library. Frowning, Naruto began to walk towards to the training grounds once again, the day's events replaying in his head. He gripped his hair, pulling at his head before letting out a frustrated shout.

Why was no one responding to his pranks?

He ignored the strange looks the villagers were sending his way, most likely due to his outburst, and stomped his feet in childish temper. He had expected at least one person to complain about not sleeping well due to small lumps in their beds. However, the only person that complained about being unable to sleep was Sasuke, and he didn't complain about the bed at all!


The villagers continued to observe their obviously troubled Hokage. A little girl whispered to her mother, "Mama, is Hokage-sama crazy?" The mother hushed her and they resumed walking to their home.

"Pretend you didn't see anything. Crazy people are not right in the head."

"But how come he's the hokage if he's crazy, then?" The mother paused, thinking of how to answer her daughter.

"He's not always crazy, Misako."

"Why not?" Again, the mother hummed to herself, trying to come up with an answer.

"Because sometimes, love makes people crazy."

Unfortunately, that was not the case with our Uzumaki, Naruto.

He made it to the training grounds and frowned to see it empty before realizing that most of them were probably on their lunch break. He plopped onto the grass and crossed his arms, brows scrunching together as he thought about what to do next. He decided to stop with the pea-bed prank, but he needed to replace it with something. Immediately, a light bulb went off and he grinned a sinister grin before summoning his shadow clones.

"Alright, you guys, I need you to buy some stuff for me." As he explained the situation to the multiple Narutos, their curious looks all changed to one of a cunning fox. Now this is going to get someone riled up.

Hours later, Kakashi was walking to the training grounds, his nose buried in the latest edition of Icha Icha Paradise. He had promised to meet up with Chouji to help him with an exercise he prepared for his genin team. As he approached the borders of the training grounds, the copycat nin felt the lack of friction too late as he fell on his back. He sat up, more dazed than in pain, to see what he slipped on. His eyes widened as he took in the surroundings.

Everything was covered in peas.

There were peas glued to the punching posts and trees, covering the surface of the small ponds, and all over the floor.

Kakashi rubbed his eyes and lightly smacked his cheeks with both hands to make sure that he was awake. He looked around again and sighed.

Yup, this was all real.

"What the hell is all this shit?" He turned to see Kiba looking around furiously. "Why are there peas here, too?" Akamaru barked loudly and growled and Kakashi concluded that they both were in a foul mood.

Guess they must've hated peas.

Kakashi stood up and dusted off whatever dirt was clinging to him before waving at the shorter man. "Yo." A feral look was sent his way and the copycat nin just grinned.

"Are you behind this prank, Kakashi?" The said man merely shook his head.

"Nope, not at all. But I gather something must've happened to you, based on how you said, 'Why are there peas here, too?'" Kakashi replied. With a wave, he disappeared in a cloud of smoke, leaving behind Kiba and his canine staring at the mess that was the training grounds. They both sighed; what to do now?

"Eh? What happened to the training grounds?" He turned to see several genin and their team leaders staring at the scene, Chouji among them. The large man approached Kiba slowly, as to not slip on the round peas.

"Kiba, what happened?" The Inuzaka shook his head.

"I have no idea, Chouji. I came here to train only to see the grounds covered in this." He motioned to the vegetables lying innocently on the ground in disgust. "Something like this happened in my room, too." He watched his friend shrug and then heard Akamaru bark. He turned to the dog to see him sniff at the ground before barking again. Kiba's eyes sparkled.

Finally, a lead.

"Chouji, I'll be right back," he said, leaping onto Akamaru's back. The canine rushed to the direction of where the scent was leading him and they bought grinned in glee.

Revenge would be sweet.

Naruto sneezed once again before looking out at Konoha from atop of the Hokage Mountain. He grinned deviously, wondering if the genin teams had arrived at the training grounds yet. He was glad that some people would be as miserable as he was today. He lied down onto the rock and his eyes closed as he took in the fresh breeze. Before he knew it, he fell asleep, the day's work taking a toll on him.

And that was how Kiba had found the blond.

They snuck up on the blond as to not wake him and both sucked in a large amount of air.

"UZUMAKI NARUTO, WAKE UP, YOU ASSHOLE!" Startled, the said man woke up to Kiba's loud scream and his companion's bark. He looked at them wide-eyed, dazed and confused, and looked around.

"What, what? Is there something wrong, is the village under attack?"


Naruto found himself gripping the back of his head and rubbed the sore spot where Kiba had just struck him. He looked up at the man who seemed to be satisfied at his pain and voiced his anger.

"What the hell was that for, you bastard?"

"You know full well what that was for, jerk! You covered the training grounds in peas. Out of all thing, fucking peas, man!" Naruto blinked owlishly, his pain forgotten. He thought he covered his tracks very well for that one.

"And another thing, were you the one who planted the peas in my room? You know, I woke up gasping for air because they were fucking stuck up my nose!" Naruto continued to stare at the man who ranted on and on about the misery of peas, his dog barking besides him before he decided to interrupt.

"Hey Kiba, how did you sleep?"

"Terrible because I was on the verge of dying, like I said earlier-"

"No, I don't mean that, before the pea-plugging-nose crap. I mean, were you sore or anything?" This stopped Kiba's rant and he paused, curious.

"Uh, no. Not that I know of; I was kind of too busy worrying about dying. Why?" Immediately Naruto shook his head fervently and stood up, seeing his change to run.

"Nothing special," he said quickly before waving at him. "Well, I have to find Sai, so I'll see you later!" The blond was gone in a cloud of smoke and Kiba felt as if he was experiencing a case of déjà vu. It was only moments ago that he was standing before the training grounds, Kakashi disappearing in a similar fashion. Immediately, he gasped as he realized he let the perpetrator get away.

"Damn you, Uzumaki!"

Naruto found the ex-ROOT member painting an image of Naruto getting squashed by a pea and the blond tried so very hard to not pummel the emotionless ninja to death. The news of his prank traveled fast, it seemed. He approached the dark-haired man, who was already aware of his presence.

"Why, hello, dickless. How can I help you?" The blond ignored the offensive nickname before he asked Sai the question of the day.

"Hey, Sai, how did you sleep last night?"

"I slept well, but I did dream about something interesting." This caught the blond's interest, and dark eyes observed him before continuing.

"I dreamt of the rookie 9 going to the bathhouse and all of us discovering you were dickless-" Naruto promptly punched the man before making his way towards the center of Konoha. He found his mood getting increasingly worse as the day went on. Not due to Sai's comment on Naruto's lack of male genitalia (which was untrue), but at the fact that all of these people had the same answers; answers that he did not want to hear.

I slept well, thank you for asking.

Maybe Sasuke's grouchiness was just a coincidence?

Deeming his prank to be a failed one, Naruto settled into a stool at his most beloved restaurant, Ichiraku Ramen. He ordered his usual and rested his chin in his palm as he thought back on the day's events. All of these people were unknowingly victims of his prank, but he guessed he couldn't call them victims anymore. The only ones who truly suffered at the hands of his pea-prank-compilation were the genin and, to an extent, Konohamaru. He sighed and swirled the liquid in his teacup before taking a chug. A bowl of steaming ramen was set before him and, before the blond had a chance to snap his chopsticks, he felt a familiar surge of chakra and braced himself.

Emerald eyes gleamed in fury and their owner punched Naruto in the back of the head, smiling as he face-planted into his bowl of ramen. She patted herself at the satisfactory job before she felt an escape of chakra and watched as the man she punched disappear in a cloud of smoke. A vein popping from her head, she realized that she had just punched a clone and ordered a ramen before heading to the bathroom. Something had been scratching against her breasts since the morning and it was quite bothersome. Once she made it to the bathroom, she quickly checked the inside of her bra to see if there was anything strange. There was little lighting in the lavatory and she didn't see anything out of the ordinary, but goodness, was it annoying.

She dug deep into her shirt to locate the source of irritation. She grinned as she found the offending object and pulled her hand out of her shirt. Unfolding her hand, her eyes narrowed on a lone pea that lay innocently in the center of her palm. She crushed it as her fury returned tenfold.

"Naruto, you are fucking dead when I catch you!"


Reaching home, Naruto closed the door and hugged himself as he felt shivers down his spine. His chakra from his shadow clone had returned to him moments ago and he could only imagine what hate-filled words were spilling from Sakura's mouth at the moment.

He stood in the hallway until his brief fright disappeared before proceeding into his house and heading into the kitchen. He looked in the pots to see miso soup that Sasuke had probably brewed before he left and heated it up, stirring it absentmindedly. Maybe it was time to just give up on the pranks for the time being.

A loud slam echoed through the house and Naruto turned to see his lover stomp into the kitchen, a fierce look on his face. So his mood hadn't improved while he was out on the mission. Dark eyes met his and they softened before their owner approached the blond quietly. The Uchiha gave him a chaste kiss, murmuring "I'm home," against his lips.

Naruto smiled before returning the kiss, deepening it. "Welcome home."

They parted as Sasuke left to change into a casual attire and Naruto went back to stirring the soup, deciding on a simple natto-topped steamed rice meal with pickled vegetables on the side. He prepared their dinner and set the table, waiting patiently for his lover to join him.

"A bit over-doing it on the soy beans today, aren't we?" The blond startled and met the cool gaze of his lover before looking away in panic. Shit, don't tell me the bastard found out?

"Miso soup with fermented beans over rice and more beans in the pickled vegetables…Did your taste change from ramen to beans?" Naruto let out a breath he didn't know he was holding and smiled.

"No, but I just didn't want to do much cooking tonight." Good, he didn't find out. He heard something akin to a snort escape from Sasuke and looked to see an amused expression in the other's eye. He frowned. "What?"

"You call your meals cooking, idiot?" Picking up his chopsticks, he threw it at his lover in irritation. His cooking wasn't that bad, honestly!

"Screw you, jerk. You can starve for all I care." Naruto began to eat, ignoring the chuckles that Sasuke emitted. He decided not to give up on his prank. Anything to get back at the bastard for mocking his cooking; who was the one that prepared dinner every night? He couldn't understand why the Uchiha couldn't just eat and not comment on his mediocre skills.

"How was your mission today?" asked the blond, knowing that it was one of the reasons why his lover arrived in such a foul mood. His mood shot up when there was a sudden decrease in room temperature and decided to push the Uchiha's buttons even more. "If I'm not mistaken, it was a brief delivery for the feudal lord, was it not?"

He watched in silent glee as the metal chopsticks Sasuke was holding started to bend as the man clenched them in his hand. He muttered quietly and Naruto strained his ears to catch the words.

"What was that?"

"I said that stupid lord asked me to deliver a stupid teddy bear. The only reason it was ranked A was because the teddy bear was adorned with a diamond collar, which is why so many bandits were after it. Can the officials in the government be any more idiotic?" Naruto snickered as an image of a fluffy teddy with a large, sparkling collar appeared in his mind. "It's not funny!"

"Yeah yeah, whatever you say, bastard." He picked up their plates as they were done eating and headed to the sink before he was pushed to the side, his lips trapped in a strong kiss. Tan lids closed over blue eyes and Naruto wrapped his arms around Sasuke's neck, deepening their brief moment of intimacy.

"I'll do the dishes today, dead last," Sasuke murmured against the blond's lips, wincing as Naruto bit his lip in reply. Note to self: don't call Naruto your favorite pet names while kissing.

They parted and Sasuke turned on the faucet and began to wash the dishes. He still felt the presence of his lover behind him and smirked.

"You can go ahead and take a bath first. You don't have to wait for me, idiot." He was met with silence and Sasuke frowned, about to turn until he felt Naruto's arms wrap around his midsection.

"Naruto?" he asked, wondering what was wrong. He stood still in his embrace as he felt his lover tense before relaxing. He turned to meet bright blue eyes staring back into his own.

"Do the dishes later. I want you now." Sasuke felt himself smirk before kissing his lover, never breaking contact as they made their way into their bedroom. Now this was a dessert he could get used to.


It took several minutes to take their clothes off before Sasuke was taken by surprise as his blond pushed him back down onto the bed.

"Tonight, I'm the one controlling the relationship." The Uchiha merely stared at Naruto, his cock already twitching painfully. He watched as the blond teased his entrance with lube-covered fingers, tan lids closing in delight as the hokage scissored himself. After a few painful moments for Sasuke, the blond took out his fingers and began to trail his hands down a pale chest. The dark-haired man held in a shudder as cool hands grasped his length and he watched with lidded eyes as Naruto teased him continuously. Sasuke could feel the head push in the blond's entrance slightly before being taken out again. He could feel a frustrated growl rise in his throat.

"Damn it, Naruto, stop teasing!" The blond had a sultry smirk on his face and moved himself off of his lover's length, enjoying the look of discontent on the Uchiha's face. He blew air slightly on the tip and watched as Sasuke's eyes closed in pleasure before lifting himself atop his lover's cock once more.

"What do you want, Sasuke?" he whispered, eyes hooded. He watched the said man raise himself on his elbows as he looked at the blond with a fierce gaze, a bead of sweat dripping from his forehead.

"I want you." And with those three simple words, Naruto slid himself onto his lover's erection and let out a shuddered breath. He felt so full. Sasuke took this chance and gripped Naruto's sides, beginning to thrust upwards until the blond grasped his hands and stopped him.

"Not today, Sasuke," Naruto whispered again huskily, his eyes filled with love and passion. "I'm taking control today."

He began to go in a steady motion of lifting himself up and riding Sasuke's cock while watching his lover's expressions intently. Soon the steady motion turned into erratic bounces as Naruto began to pump himself as he impaled himself upon the Uchiha repeatedly.

"Sas-ngah-Sasuke." The man beneath him just watched, breathless and fascinated by this erotic creature riding him and they shifted slightly to the right on the bed. Suddenly, the lust-filled expression disappeared and was replaced with a look of anger.

"There it is again, that feeling!" Naruto abruptly stopped, still in a lustful daze.

"Hah…Sasuke, what's wrong?" He struggled to get out. "If you didn't notice, we're in the middle of sex."

"There's this feeling that something's stabbing my back!" Sasuke responded, immensely annoyed at the fact that whatever was bothering him had interrupted his sex life. The mood shattered as Naruto bursted out in laughter, daze erased. He lifted himself off Sasuke before shoving his lover aside despite the other's protests and lifted the mattress.

"Idiot, what are you doing?" Sasuke questioned before he stopped as Naruto pulled out a pea with a triumphant smirk. "What is that?"

The blond placed his hand between them as he showed the pea to his lover, grinning from ear to ear. I can't believe this actually worked! Despite Naruto's glee, Sasuke was still heavily confused and voiced his question again.

"What is that pea doing under the mattress?" He stopped as Naruto gave him a devious look and he mentally face-palmed, seeing where this was going.

"This is what had been bothering you this entire week, Sasuke. You remember how I told you about the kids wanting to pull the pea prank on the princess? Well, since you're a royal stick-up-the-butt bastard, I figured it'd be good to try it out on you." The blond ignored the Uchiha glare and continued, "Turns out I was right; you are a bastard prince." Sasuke shifted his glare to the pea and then back to Naruto.

"So, all this time, the thing that was bothering me from a good sleep and a good fuck was a stupid pea?"

"Yup." Sasuke glare increased tenfold as Naruto's grin turned cheekier. He immediately knocked the offending vegetable out of the blond's hand before pulling the other towards him.

"Hey, wha-" The Uchiha cut off his lover with a kiss as he pushed Naruto back down onto the mattress, stealing the blond's breath. They parted and, before Naruto had a chance to utter another word, their lips met again. Sasuke's hand roamed down the chest of the blond, flicking a nipple. He felt delighted when he earned a pleasured cry and, using the opportunity, carefully slid back inside his lover, who was still wet from their previously interrupted escapade.

"Sasuke, Sasuke, Sasuke!" He heard his lover cry. Naruto's eyes were clenched shut as he tightly gripped the blanket, feeling the fullness of his lover. Never ever would he give Sasuke up for anything; not in a million years. The Uchiha lowered his head, placing soft kisses upon the blond's face, and started a slow pace.

"Naruto," he muttered repeatedly. His pace began to quicken, shifting their angles which made Naruto gasp out in pleasure as his prostrate was suddenly stimulated. The blond brought his arms around Sasuke's neck and their lips met in another kiss, the thrusts only quickening as they both began to reach their peak. Sasuke wrapped one of his hands around Naruto's cock, pumping it as his thrusts grew erratic.

"Naruto, Naruto, Naruto…" he said breathily. Their gazes met briefly before azure eyes closed in orgasmic pleasure.

"Sa-ah! Sasuke!" the blond cried out as he came, his white fluids covering their stomachs. Sasuke clenched his eyes and bit Naruto lightly as he felt his lover clench down on him and soon followed, hearing the blond shudder as he coated his insides with semen. The arm that was supporting Sasuke suddenly grew limp and the Uchiha collapsed on top of his lover, their breath harsh and the air smelling of sex. Slowly, he pulled out, wincing as he heard a slight 'plop' before he saw his semen fall from Naruto's puckered entrance. He suppressed his desires which began to rise again at the erotic sight. He lay beside Naruto, embracing his lover and closing his eyes before taking in the other's deep scent. The blond was his and only his.

"Sasuke, I love you." He felt, rather than heard, the whispered words across his skin. The said man opened his eyes to meet Naruto's gaze, blue eyes filled with warmth and love and he felt his breath escape him; Naruto looked beautiful. Sasuke closed the distance between them, encasing his lover in another deep kiss before parting and then planting another light one.

"I love you, too," he replied, reaching over his lover quickly to turn off the lights before resting back beneath the covers. Black met blue and the two grinned (or rather, one grinned and the other smirked) before they kissed and embraced, quickly falling to sleep.

And on the floor besides the nightstand, the pea lay alone and forgotten.


~The Prince and the Pea – Completed 01.04.11~

Chibi Chidori's Nonsense:

Hehe, so on April Fool's Day, I finish this wonderful oneshot, The Prince and the Pea. This actually came to me while I was sleeping. I like to have things under my pillow (because my pillow is super fluffy and I don't feel anything) but I woke up with a bruise one morning and wondered where it came from, only to feel something poking my shoulder blade. Turns out it was a penny under my mattress blanket (something that covers the bed sheet to avoid direct contact with the sheets) and I was surprised that I was so sensitive to that, considering my mattress blanket is a good 2 inches thick. So I figured, why not write something similar via Naruto-verse and voila! You have the creation of this oneshot!

I had so much fun writing this and I despite it being a oneshot, I'm going to write a companion chapter to this. It's not going to be a separate fic or a sequel, but a mere companion chapter which can be read either together or separate so it doesn't really continue the story. It's half written, but who knows when I'll finish it since graduation is approaching soon (and I also have my final intern reports to do before I head to graduate school.) It took me forever to finish this one (a couple of weeks, haha).

Anyhow, I'm digressing. I really enjoyed writing this and I hope you guys enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing this! Look forward to the companion chapter (which will be updated with this fic!)

Thank you all for reading and thank you to those who review! Criticism or just commenting on how much you liked it is always appreciated! :)


Chibi Chidori