A/N: Just a fun little story on a dare from my BFF. Sure, Edward's sexy, but can he be sexy working at Wal-mart? Of course he can! And here's the proof! No offense meant to anyone working at Wal-mart (trust, I love this store!)... it was just one of the least glamorous places she could think of (it certainly is when you're dragging three screaming kids through it)!

Awesome Beta: MythicCreatures

"Thank you so much… Eddie, is it? I'll be sure to put in a good word with your manager."

I briefly watched the plump older woman walk away with her prize toilet wand in hand before glancing down at that infernal nametag.

Eddie.

My name was not Eddie. Technically.

Descending the steps of the employees-only ladder, I pushed it back to the corner column where it belonged and went back to stocking Glade Plug-Ins.

I hated Wal-Mart.

As it turns out Wal-Mart in Connecticut and Wal-Mart in California were identical, save the palm trees outside. I'd put up with the less-than-glamorous job every day after high school until the week that I both turned eighteen and graduated. I'd been counting down for two weeks… not for my birthday or graduation, but for my last day at the store. It came with little outward fanfare, but inside there was a rave going on. I'd purchased my one-way ticket to Los Angeles for the following day and was thrilled to shake loose the little town I grew up in to pursue my dream of becoming an actor. It was clique, but I knew I was good looking enough to at least book a few casting calls. My talent would have to take it from there.

Four months later and I was practically back where I had started. Only slightly more frustrated.

Even though I had a little money saved up, I hit the ground running as soon as the plane landed. I managed to secure three jobs within the span of a week. None of them were pay acting gigs, but they were a means to an end.

The first was with Dominos Pizza. Just hours after I dropped six hundred bucks on a very used hatchback, I had a glowing pizza sign stuck to the roof. The Dominos plan was two-fold. First, I needed to eat. A few free slices here and there I was already saving money. Two, famous people needed to eat. And I imagine they'd rather have the food come to them. It was a long shot, but it only took one influential industry insider answering the door to find my handsome mug standing there to make all my dreams come true. Surely it was just a matter of an audition or two from there, right?

I wasn't stupid enough to put all of my hopes and dreams on one farfetched scheme. That led to job number two: a strip mall convenience store. The convenience store wasn't my original plan, but the photographer who held a studio in the same mall wasn't accepting applications (even for a janitor, I asked). But it was all about proximity. I didn't have the money that headshots required but I had enough charm to worm my way into some free ones if I was around a capable photographer. Alice was nice enough too but every time I broached the topic of sitting in for some camera test shots, she shrugged me off saying a photograph couldn't capture my perfection. I was half-tempted to take advantage of her appreciation of me and see if I could get laid but I decided the headshots were still more important. Sex would have to wait.

Job number three appeared to be a step in the right direction at first: an assistant at a casting agency. Even if I was making copies I would still be visible while directors and producers came in for casting sessions. And why couldn't they mistake me for one of the hunks they were seeing that day? The only problem was that my main duty was to walk dogs. The office had a pet-friendly policy and everyone from top execs to lowly assistants (the ones lucky enough to stay in the office to work) brought their pooches in. And I spent a couple of hours a day walking them around a nearby park. So much for being visible.

The job at Wal-mart was a last resort. Three and a half months in LA and my car died. I was automatically on hiatus at Dominos as a result of it and although my other jobs were within walking distance from my studio apartment, I needed a car. I had no skills to offer a mechanic but hoped to have better luck charming a mechanic than I'd had with Alice.

So I reluctantly stalked into a Wal-mart that was situated right next to a local auto body shop. One glowing review later from my former manager and I was working the aisles of another nondescript warehouse. It was merely a matter of kismet that a former employee named "Eddie" had been fired just hours before I was hired. That's how I became "Eddie." It was close enough to Edward, my new manager reasoned. That, and their label machine was broken.

As much as I hated walking back through those taunting automatic doors every day, Rosalie had made things bearable. She was the local mechanic, it turned out. I met her on my lunch break from Wal-mart one day and she took me under her wing pretty quickly. Although she didn't appear to put much stock in my plan for Hollywood greatness, she was kind and agreed to get parts for cost when I'd saved up enough money. It didn't hurt that she was hot too. Soon it became habit to wander over and watch her work on my breaks from Hell-mart.

Today though, there would be no break. As much as that should have pissed me off, I was actually quite happy about it. When my manager had approached me about working a double because of a no-show, I jumped at the chance. Today our Wal-mart was the backdrop for some pivotal scenes in a teeny bopper Disney show. Not necessarily my idea of Hollywood greatness, but tv was tv. The longer I could spend stocking shelves near the set that had been built in house wares, the more likely I was to be noticed by someone. Anyone.

My hopes began to wane as I entered hour twelve of my shift and had not managed to glimpse a single powerful entity on set. Everyone appeared to be below-the-line employees, no actors or directors. It dawned on me that perhaps tomorrow was the day they'd be shooting. It looked like today was mostly setup. Damn. I had tomorrow off.

I finally took ten minutes outside to get out from under the glare of the fluorescents. A caravan of trailers lined the side of the building where the employee entrance was. We didn't get paid until Friday but I could always claim ignorance and stop in tomorrow for my paycheck. When I realized it was Wednesday I could take a walk around and see if I turned any bigwigs' heads. Lame, but at least it was a plan. That's when I saw her. Bella Swan.

She wasn't the lead of the teeny bopper show but she did play the kooky best friend. And if she was here now then that meant they must be shooting overnight. Damn, again. Breezing past me to enter through the employee door, she shot a gleaming smile at me briefly before she disappeared inside. Going through an actress didn't seem like the most reliable way to get ahead in Hollywood, but none of my other plans were working. Besides I had some serious sexual frustration built up from all the flirting with Alice. I had another six minutes. I was ready to turn on the charm.

Five and a half minutes passed and she hadn't come back out. I decided to walk a quick loop around the trailers before heading back inside. If Bella Swan was here maybe Jessica Stanley was too. She played the lead on the show and was hot. Don't get me wrong, Bella was hot. Much hotter in person than she ever appeared on the show. They always had her dressed in mismatched, wild prints with her hair in some spiky ponytail, just like today. But Jessica was class all the way. Stylish wardrobe, cascading curls, gigantic tits.

I stopped listing Jessica's attributes when I got to tits. My mind wasn't doing the thinking anymore, as was evidenced by the sudden tightness in my jeans. Forget my grand Hollywood plan, I needed to get laid. And fast. Then I could go back to concentrating on how to take over the entertainment industry.

The only thing on my mind other than Jessica Stanley's ample chest was how I could arrange to get some overtime in the stockroom tonight. Anything that made it more likely for me to run into her. That's when I ran into someone else. Bella Swan.

She was walking quickly toward one of the trailers with her head down, cell phone to her ear. The slight crease in her forehead that indicated frustration disappeared as she looked up at me, snapping her phone shut. I held my hands out in a defensive gesture, about to apologize for bumping into her when she tore her eyes from mine to gaze up and down my body. She lingered on the bulge in my pants before making their way back up to my face. I imagine the fire I saw in her eyes was just a reflection of my own. Looking at her this close I could see just how beautiful her big, brown eyes actually were. And her pale skin was flawless. I'd give anything to see her cheeks flush but there was no embarrassment on her part as she looked to the crazy copper mess that was my hair.

Shoving her phone into the pocket of her crazy striped pants, she practically growled, "You'll do," before grabbing a fistful of hair in her slender fingers and pulling my face to hers. Her lips were soft but forceful and I staggered backward until I felt the metal stairs of a trailer hit the back of my legs. Our kiss never broke as I worked my way awkwardly up the steps and fumbled with the door handle. Forcing her tongue into my mouth, Bella grew impatient and used my body to open the door.

Handle be damned.

Once inside, I used her body to close the door, pressing every inch of my tall frame against hers. I moved my lips to her long neck so we could both breathe for a second. Tipping her chin up so I had more access to her skin, my hands rose from her waist to her ribcage. Not quite where I wanted to be, but close.

"And you are…" I realized she was talking to me.

I pulled back from her momentarily, my brain taking a little control back from my dick. Maybe she wasn't up for a quick fuck in her trailer. One should never assume. I saw her eyes crinkle as she smiled and glanced down briefly.

"Eddie. Nice to meet you. I'm Bella. Why am I still wearing my clothes?"

Eddie again, damn it. I hated that nametag- wait a minute. What? Right, clothes, off.

Grinning, I dove back onto her lips. Reaching for her hair, I roughly pulled the elastic from her crazy ponytail and ran my fingers through her hair. We broke our kiss again so she could shake her hair out and damn, she was really good looking without the ridiculous hairstyle. I was beyond relieved that she hadn't been to make up yet because as beautiful as she was the bright green eye shadow and purple lipstick her character usually wore would've been a major turnoff. Okay, not a major turnoff, probably not even a turnoff. But I wouldn't have enjoyed myself nearly as much as I was right now. Pulling my hands back up to her ribcage, I ventured higher and reached for the buttons on her polka-dotted shirt.

"This wardrobe is fucking ridiculous." I wrenched my hands apart, popping the top two buttons off into the trailer somewhere. "And it belongs nowhere near this body." Her hands gripped mine and she smiled wide as we both scattered the rest of the buttons. Beneath her shirt was pure white skin, black lace and big tits.

Who the hell knew that was hiding underneath those clothes all along?

I may have said that out loud. Bella giggled. The sound was in direct contrast to her actions as she pressed forcefully into me, one hand firmly grabbing my erection right through my pants. Taken by surprise, I gasped loudly before groaning into her mouth.

Bella's hands moved to my shirt but I beat her to it and whipped it off over my head. Before she could admire my much-worked for six pack, I was on my knees, unbuttoning her pants.

"Let's get these as far away from you as possible too." I supported her weight as she shifted from leg to leg, shuffling the pants off and revealing yet again more black lace. I groaned into her lips again, her lower ones. Biting her lightly through the lace I couldn't help but notice how wet her panties were. Slipping a finger under to feel just how warm and wet she was earned me a low moan. Her fingers gripped my hair again, pulling me closer.

"These are a fuck-lot better than your other wardrobe. But you don't need any help." I slipped the panties down her legs and paused momentarily when I got a good look at her, exposed before me. I knew this wasn't a good time for stalling but luckily she understood my hesitation. That giggle bubbled forth from her mouth again and she tugged on my hair.

"What's a matter, Eddie? Cat got your tongue? 'Cause I'd really like it."

Cat, indeed. Right there on her bare nether regions was the tattoo of a tiny kitten. A pussy, as it were. Bent low in a prowling pose and angled right for those wet folds. There was the slightest smirk on the feline's face but the detail that stopped me in my tracks was it's pink tongue. Sticking out, poised to lap up its owner's juices at a moment's notice. I was jealous. Jealous of a fucking cartoon tattoo cat that got to reside less than a centimeter from the promised land. Goddamn.

"Lucky pussy." I murmured as I leaned in and licked slowly up her slick lips.

"I'll say." She managed to stammer out.

My tongue was long and I let Bella feel every inch of it as I dragged along her again, dipping the tip ever so slightly into her before continuing on my way. Holding the tip of my tongue in a rigid point, I circled her clit before licking her again, faster now. I slipped my tongue into her further and further until she was panting above me. Moving my thumb to her clit, I enjoyed her taste as I plunged my tongue into her again and again. Her fingernails had been scratching gentle circles into my scalp but her tempo suddenly changed and she dug in harder. Just when I was afraid she might draw blood, it suddenly didn't matter anymore. I was swept away as her orgasm flooded into my mouth, allowing me to lick up every last drop of her sweet taste.

It was incredibly uncomfortable to stand up again, my cock so hard in my jeans. Luckily Bella seemed to be able to read my mind. As our mouths came together again, she popped the buttons on my fly, giving me a little relief. Licking around my lips, I could feel her smile as she tasted herself on me.

"Let's see if you've got a matching set."

She pulled back and brought her other hand to help slide my pants down.

"Ooh, yes. Long tongue, really long cock." Her eyes darted up to mine as she licked her lips. "That looks delicious."

Not one to deny her something delicious to eat, I leaned back a little while thrusting my hips toward her. There was that giggle again. Thank god I already knew she was impressed with my cock, otherwise I might have been offended. The beautiful sound continued as she sunk to her knees and grabbed my ass. Without a second's hesitation, she had my cock in her mouth. Holy fuck.

I sucked in a deep breath and held it in my chest until it hurt. Anything to distract me. Still holding me in her mouth, she swept her tongue back and forth over the underside of my cock. Finally she sucked her cheeks in hard and pulled back slowly until I popped out of her mouth. I found I was holding my breath again but managed to look down with enough time to see her lean in again. Fuck, fuck, fuck.

The next time she pulled off of me and glanced up to see me watching.

"Enjoying the show, Eddie?"

Humming, I nodded. "You look like you're having a good time down there."

"Oh, I am." She removed her hands from my ass as she took me in her mouth again. Closing my eyes, I threw my head back. She moaned around my cock, forcing my eyes open to look down at her again. Oh fuck.

Bella had her fingers dipping into the cups of her black lace bra, playing with herself. I watched as the movement continued; only being able to imagine just how she was touching herself. That damn bra needed to come off. Again, it was as if she could read my mind. She slipped one hand low to rub circles around her clit while her other hand twisted behind her back to unclasp the bra. As my head slipped out of her mouth again, she kept her tongue swirling around and around as her hands lowered the bra from her shoulders. I had been slowly thrusting my hips toward her each time she took my cock deep into her mouth but again I was stopped in my tracks. A glint of silver caught my eye. Two glints of silver. Nipple rings.

Unfortunately I was too tall to reach them from here and she seemed to know I'd want nothing more than to touch them. As she took my cock into her mouth again, she sat back on her heels. When she pulled back, I helped. Pushing her away from my glistening cock and pulling her up to me. My hands flew to the nipple rings. Giving a slight tug, I watched her head drop back and her eyes close. The sound that came from her was heavenly. I tugged again and dipped my head down to flick one of the rings with my tongue. The pink, pebbled nipple rose to meet my tongue and I enjoyed each one.

So distracted by the nipple ring revelation, I only just noticed the proximity of my cock to her still wet pussy. I could feel her pulsing as my cock bobbed lightly against her clit.

"What are waiting for? A flashing 'enter' sign?" She smirked.

"You've got all the other bells and whistles." I replied.

Her voice took on a more serious tone. "You know who I work for. They keep us practically sterile and I get tested every two weeks." She jerked her hips toward mine, the slick head of my cock pressed sharply into her slick clit. "Get on with it and get me off already."

Her sense of humor was back and I bent my knees slightly while grabbing my cock in one hand. I twisted one of her nipple rings until her moan was nice and loud and then drove into her. Sinking in, hot and deep, my moan grew to match hers. Bella jumped onto me, her lean legs wrapping around me, pushing me further into her. I staggered back but caught myself with another quick thrust forward. I must've hit just the right spot because her moaning built into a scream. Pressing deeper and harder, I urged the scream on. The strain in my legs was nothing compared to the strain in my cock. Pulsing hard and long, I rubbed against her tight walls, leaning forward to bite her lip hard. She bit me back, halting her scream. Her hands were back in my hair and I dug my fingers into the flesh of her ass to match her grip on my scalp.

"God, you taste good everywhere." I spit out before biting her lip again. Pretty sure I drew blood; I licked hungrily at her lip.

"You have no idea." Her teeth clamped down on my lip as she wiggled her ass in my hands. My eyebrows shot up briefly before she lifted herself in my arms and then slammed back down, impaling herself on my cock again.

Our bodies became slick with sweat as we worked feverishly together. Bella's scream grew again as I dragged my teeth across her earlobe, sucking it into my mouth. I panted into her neck and felt pressure building in my balls. My cock was pulsing as Bella's walls quivered around me, pulling me with her over the edge, into a blinding orgasm.

Her screams turned into whimpers and finally into light gasps as her breathing slowed and a smile touched her lips. Now that parts of my body other than my cock had blood flowing to them, my legs started to give out. I pulled out of her and we collapsed onto a couch against the wall just behind us.

Well, damn, if I had known that was there all along…

After a few minutes I managed to pull my jeans back up over my hips and buttoning up, covering myself. Bella was still completely exposed but as we both looked at the pile of discarded wardrobe, I think it was agreed that she looked much better naked.

"I could get used to this wardrobe." I ran my fingers lightly down her back, watching her shiver under my touch.

"So not appropriate for a family show." She leaned in for what I thought was a kiss but instead she sucked my tongue fiercely before pulling back to lick the stubble along my jaw line. I could feel her fingers pressing against my taut stomach muscles as they worked their way down to my happy trail. Her hand stopped when she reached my re-buttoned jeans. She glanced down.

"Can't he play anymore?" She pouted.

"Naptime, Bella. Give him a few minutes." I smiled.

"Oh. Is that all?" She pressed her hand against my crotch and my hips unconsciously reacted to her touch. There was that giggle again.

At the same time there was a brief knock at the trailer door before it swung widely open. A tall hulk of a man entered the trailer, making it seem infinitely smaller all of a sudden. He took a couple of seconds to survey the scene, giving me just enough time to grab my shirt and throw it over as much of Bella as I could. She seemed unconcerned by her current state of undress or even the wide open door. I couldn't help but shift uncomfortably under the gaze of the man standing before me. Finally he sighed and dropped his head into one of his giant hands, rubbing his eyes. He spoke without looking at us.

"Care to put something on, Bella?"

"No, I'm good." She shrugged in my tightened grip a little. The man finally looked up at me.

"And you are…" A snicker escaped both Bella and I at the familiar words. She got herself under control before I did.

"Eddie."

That stopped my laughing.

"Edward. Cullen. Edward Cullen." I corrected.

Bella squirmed a little, working her hot little body onto my lap, my shirt still covered her.

"He wants his formal name in the credits." She demanded.

"Credits?" The hulk raised one eyebrow. I have to admit, so did I.

"Sure. Meet my new love interest. Eddie." She pulled on the nametag that rested across her perfect tits.

"Aww, Bella. What the fuck."

"Fuck nothing, Emmett. Better yet," she turned in my lap, my cock quickly rising to the occasion, "fuck Eddie."

My jaw dropped a little and she took advantage of it. Sticking her tongue out and into my mouth, she licked along my lips before turning back to Emmett.

"You should be happy, Emmett. I just saved you guys a lot of legwork. Mr. Whitlock will be thrilled. Cast him as my love interest on the show and we'll be seen out in public. Holding hands, going to basketball games, sharing iced mochas, fucking like its going out of style. Okay, maybe that last part we'll keep inside." Bella dropped her head back onto my shoulder and ran a hand down to my crotch. The ball was now in Emmett's court, it seemed.

"You don't need to do all of this, Bella." Emmett gestured to us. "Go out with the guy we cast and get the show a little publicity too, that's all. Hell, it'll be good for your career to get the extra exposure."

"I don't care about exposure, Em. My career's just fine. I've done nothing but concentrate on my career since I was eight. I've let Dad set up my auditions. Mom drag me to be plucked and peeled. Fucking Esme with her poise and articulation classes. Carlisle's a ruthless agent and you're a fucking genius of a manager. So what about me? When do I get some say in things?"

Bella wasn't expecting or waiting for an answer. But she did know the power of taking a beat. Another quick squirm in my lap and I was biting back a groan. Her hand that was pressed against my crotch quickly popped my button fly open.

"My pussy wants a little Eddie. And so do I." Bella turned quickly on my lap so that she was straddling me. My shirt had slipped to the floor, giving Emmett a clear view of her tits and everything else before she turned away from him. The look on his face led me to believe that it was something he'd seen before. Maybe in a similar circumstance?

Arching her back slightly, Bella glanced over shoulder at Emmett. I gripped her hips, trying to keep her from flashing him another peak of her nipple.

"Is that all, Emmett? I'd like to test drive my boyfriend again." Bella tilted her hips into mine and lifted up slightly. My cock had sprung from my jeans and was throbbing between our bodies. She grabbed it in one hand, bringing it to her center. Sliding onto my length, she let out a little squeal. By the time she started rocking into my hips with a nice steady motion I realized the door had slammed shut and Emmett was gone. I had no idea how much he had seen but couldn't care less. With Bella's hot pussy gripping me tightly the world could be ending and I wouldn't care. I wove my fingers into her hair and pulled her eyes to mine.

"So I'm your boyfriend now?"

"When a guy looks like you do, you just have to be famous."

I thrust my hips up, pushing deeper into her. "You like the way I look?"

"Mmm, and the way you feel." She moaned, circling her hips. Her eyes fluttered open and looked back down at me. "Besides, I like having a project. You'll find I have a lot I could teach you."

"About?" I questioned.

"Show biz. Fucking."

I chuckled lowly and watched Bella enjoy the effects. "I think I'm good on the fucking front, don't you?"

Bella took a hungry bite from my lip and pressed down on my lap a little harder before smirking at me again.

"Pretty good. But why let a perfectly good cock go to waste?"

"Waste?" Now I was offended.

Bella leaned in and whimpered into my mouth. "Get that big boy pierced and I'll show you some real screaming."

I moaned and pulled out of her before slamming back in. "Won't that hurt, Bella?"

She shrugged and tugged on my nipples before wrapping her fingers around the base of my cock, watching me slide in and out of her. Fuck, that was hot.

"I promise to kiss it and make it all better." She pouted at me before sliding off of my lap. Now it was my turn to pout.

Where was she going?

Oops, brain filter gone again. Bella settled between my knees and smiled at my cock that was dripping with her juices. I knew she'd been close before she pulled off of me. Fuck, I had been too. Sitting up tall on her knees, Bella pressed her tits together and watched my cock bob between them. I groaned and got even harder somehow. Then she leaned forward and swiped her tongue out to taste herself on me.

"Let me give you a little preview."

She quickly swallowed her words along with my cock.

Maybe Wal-mart wasn't the worst place in the world after all.

A/N: This is meant to be a one-shot but since said BFF claims I copped out by making Eddie a wannabe actor who knows how hot he is, I am obligated to continue the Wal-Mart saga at some point. I've got a few ideas kicking around in my twisted head, so review and let me know if you want more. It'll be a different incarnation of Edward, but same locale!