ENTRY FOR THE CURVACEOUS AND BODACIOUS BOMBSHELL FIC CONTEST
Story Name: Something Within
Total Word Count: 6,789
Summary: Bella had hid behind frumpy clothes for years, yearning for a certain gorgeous green-eyed man to look at her as more than a friend. When Bella helped Alice with her Plus Size fashion show, would he finally act on the fact that he had always seen her as more?
A/N: Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight, we just like to play in her sandbox. Thanks to SingleStrand for taking the time to beta this little story.
Sometimes I wish I was still the skinny girl I once was in junior high, the one who was scrawny, flat chested and had no curves whatsoever. Instead I have what people call the hourglass look—ample cleavage, curved hips and a rounded behind.
Although I have since come to grips with my rounded figure, clothing is the bane of my existence. Nothing ever seems to fit the right way over my curves. If the top fits, then the bottom doesn't, and if I can fit it over my hips, then the waist is too big.
It's a body, not rocket science.
Being full figured shouldn't mean I have to settle on clothing, but since clothing manufacturers can't figure it out, I often do. I mostly spend my days in baggy clothing because it's the only thing I'm comfortable in. Even at work as an Emergency Response Dispatcher, I wear a baggy polo shirt and cargo pants.
The only time I look half way decent is if Alice dresses me. She's been the one constant in my life, never taking my shit and refusing to let me wallow in self-pity. Alice has always been an intricate part of my life, since before I could remember. She helped get me through some of the toughest times, especially when my dad Charlie died.
Alice has been my rock for so long, and I would do anything for her. I guess that is why right now I'm letting my best friend pin and poke me.
"Ouch! Dammit! Alice that hurt."
"Sorry. I just want these to be perfect."
Alice was an up-and-coming designer who was starting a fall line of Plus Size clothing. Right now, she was using my curves as her guide for the perfect full figure pants.
"Alice, these will be perfect, just like the rest. So, can you stop using me as a pin cushion?"
"Just hold still; I'm almost done."
"Will this be done before I have to go to work?" I asked sarcastically, knowing I still had three hours before I had to be at work.
"Ha, Ha. Very funny. Always the comedian."
As Alice finished pinning the pants, we talked about her upcoming fashion show which was now only two weeks away. She was nervous about this line since it was out of her realm, but I eased her worries, letting her know she at least had me as a customer.
We ate lunch at a little café a few blocks from her studio before I had to get to work. I had switched shifts with Garrett and was working the later shift but I didn't mind.
My social life was lacking, and my love life was nonexistent. I only went out for the occasional girls' night and bar hop, spending most nights watching romantic comedies on TBS, longing for a love life that I know I'll never be lucky enough to have. For years I've been pining over a tall, strong man with sparkling eyes and a gorgeous smile who was all-around-handsome, and I wanted him bad. Why is it that we always want what we can't ever have?
Speak of the devil.
As I exited my car and walked towards the dispatch office, I spotted a very fine Edward and another firefighter cleaning one of the fire engines. He had his standard blue uniform pants and navy tee on. His muscles flexed and contracted through the tight shirt, while his fine ass strained against the fabric as he bent to reach a low spot.
God, could he get any sexier?
As if he heard my mental monologue, he lifted his head to look right at me with a huge smile on his face. Was he really happy to see me?
"Hey B. Heading to work?"
"Yeah. I switched with Garrett."
"So, how've you been?"
"Good and you? Alice says you've been working a lot."
"Well, Chase's on his honeymoon and James got suspended, so I've been trying to help with the load."
"Well aren't you just the hero of the day."
"Yeah that's me—Hero Edward," he said, a little too sarcastically.
"So how's my sister anyway?"
"She's doing good. Actually, I just left her. I was helping her with getting some stuff ready for the fashion show."
"Oh God, I forgot about that. I can't believe she actually wants me to go."
"Really, Edward? I would think you'd want to be there to support your sister. Besides, there'll be models to drool over."
"Maybe it's not a model I want to drool over," Edward said, as he looked deeply into my eyes.
What did he mean by that last comment anyway? Was he actually saying what I think he was saying? I shook it off as another one of Edward's evasive answers.
"I gotta get to work before I'm late. Don't be a stranger, Edward."
"I won't. Bye, B."
Three hours later, I found myself sitting in dispatch working on reports that needed to be completed. I was so lost in my work, that I didn't notice the tall figure standing over my cube. I heard his chuckle before I noticed him.
"Edward! Geez, you scared me. You can't sneak up on me like that."
"Sorry, B. I did say hi when I came in, but I guess you didn't hear me. Next time I can shout if you like."
"No," I grumbled. "Shouting isn't necessary. So what brings you over?"
"Well, we decided to BBQ and we had plenty of food, so I thought I'd bring you over some."
The smile on his face was beautiful. I was glad that he had thought to bring me something to eat. In my haste with Alice earlier, I had completely forgotten my 'lunch' in the fridge at home.
"You didn't have to do this, Edward. But I'm glad you did. Thank you."
"Welcome B. You get through some more of that work of yours, and maybe I'll bring you dessert." He smirked.
Hmm … chocolate sauce, whipped cream and Edward … now that would make one hell of a dessert.
I smiled, shaking my head, but still watching his ass as he walked away.
The rest of my night was pretty quiet, a couple of calls came in, but I didn't field them. I continued to work on my paperwork. Edward kept his promise, bringing me dessert around one a.m., looking deliciously disheveled.
"Edward, please tell me that you didn't get out of bed just to bring me dessert."
He smiled a beautiful crooked smile.
"I did. I almost forgot and I felt bad. I hope it's worth the wait."
"Thanks. I ... umm, I was just about to take a break. Do you want to join me? I'll even share since it was so nice of you to bring this for me."
As I was standing from my chair, I noticed his hesitation. After all, it was after one in the morning, and he was still on shift.
"Sure, B. I'll keep you company for a bit."
We ate the warm brownie sundae that Edward had made. The air between us seemed to shift—not uncomfortable, just unusual. We never had problems talking about anything and everything before, but somehow it felt a little awkward now.
After we finished, I walked Edward out. He stopped just before we reached the hallway that connected the fire station and the dispatch building. I looked down at my feet because I didn't know what to say.
I decided a kiss on the cheek was appropriate enough to thank him, but Edward moved at the last moment and my lips brushed his. I felt a jolt, like an electric shock and jerked away.
I looked up at Edward who had a soft expression on his face, but it was a look I'd never seen before. I did the only thing I could think of; I ran as fast I could back to my cube. I'd take being a coward over the rejection any day.
I finished up my shift hoping to find a way to avoid Edward for the next few days. Yeah, I was a bury my head in the sand kinda girl.
"Bella! What's wrong with you? You're like a zombie from a bad horror flick."
I had tried to switch shifts with Garrett until it dawned on me that the FD works twenty four hours on twenty four hours off, so avoiding Edward would be damn near impossible. But the anxiety that I was experiencing after our almost kiss was killing me. I wasn't sleeping, and I was absolutely miserable.
"Sorry, Alice. I just haven't been sleeping well for the past week. Work stuff 'ya know?"
"Girl … you need to turn it off. Leave work at work. Besides, Edward's there if you need to talk. He understands what goes on down there."
Okay, so it really didn't have anything to do with work, but it was the best excuse I could come up with on the fly. Alice was right about one thing. Edward was one of the most understanding people I knew, but I didn't think he'd be so understanding when he found out I'd been crushing on him for years. And the jolt that passed through us during our almost kiss? I had no idea what to make of that at all.
"How is everything shaping up for your fashion show?" I asked Alice, as she adjusted the hem of a skirt that I was trying on for her.
"It's coming along great! Everything is just about ready. I only have a few pieces left to fit. The venue and everything else is all set up. I'm so excited. It's going to be great. You're still planning on coming, right?"
"Alice, really? I wouldn't miss it for the world."
Alice finished up hemming the skirt and checking the fit on the jacket that I had on and beamed widely, proclaiming she was done with another session of torture.
We chatted for a few more minutes after I changed, mindful to keep all her pinning in place when I handed her the skirt and jacket back. She had to run to meet with her fabric supplier, but before she left, she made me promise to meet her for lunch before the big show.
"Wednesday, lunch at the diner, okay?"
"Alright, Alice. Lunch at the diner on Wednesday. Drive safe!"
The weekend went by in a blur. Work was kicking my ass with all the calls coming in and paperwork piling up that by the time I made it home each night, I usually fell face first in a pillow. For all my worrying, I hadn't run into Edward in over a week.
It was Sunday night, and I was really looking forward to sleep when the phone rang with a hysterical Alice on the line.
"Bella, thank God."
"Alice what's wrong?"
"Five days … model canceled … need help … disaster."
Apparently Alice was so far gone, she could only talk in riddles.
"Alice, calm down and speak English. What happened?"
"A model canceled on me, said something about her mom being very ill. There's only five days until the show and I have no one to fill in. What am I going to do? Two models are just not enough."
"Alice, are you sure? There has to be something that can be done."
"B, there is one thing, but it involves you."
"Me? Alice, whatever it is, I'll help."
"Model for me."
"You heard me. I need you, B. Please … be a model in my show."
"Alice, I can't."
"Sure you can, B. The clothes fit, so that's not a problem. Mom, Dad and Edward will be there to support you. So see, no problems."
Yeah right, no problems. Just that the guy I'd been crushing on hard for the last ten years would be sitting in the audience. My self criticism was at an all-time high, how could I handle the criticism of others?
"Alice, really? Having me model is not the best idea. I can't handle all those people looking at me, especially your parents and Edward."
"They won't be looking at you, B; they'll be looking at my fabulous clothes!"
"Yeah, clothes that I'd be wearing! Alice, I love you—really I do—but this is something that is totally out of my league."
Alice sounded so sad and broken the next time she spoke.
"B, I really need you to do this. Without you, I'd have to cancel. I'd be the laughing stock of Seattle Fashion."
"There isn't a way to postpone?"
"No, there's not. It has to be this week if I want my line out next fall. It's just how the fashion world is … I can't control it." Alice sobbed.
I grumbled. After everything that Alice had done for me, there was no way I could let her dreams crash around her. I took a deep breath and uttered the words I would probably regret later.
"Okay Alice, I'll do it."
"Oh, B! Thank you, thank you, thank you! I owe you big time! I promise that everything will be fabulous! Are we still on for lunch on Wednesday?"
"Yeah, Alice, just let me know what time."
"Okay. Call you soon!"
I think I really do have a death wish. Did I really just agree to model clothing in front of people? Alice was the only person since gym class in high school to see me without my clothes that hid every flaw.
I spent another night in restless sleep thinking about every little thing that could possibly go wrong at Alice's show. Luckily, we had a shift rotation at work and I was changing to the night shift again.
I parked my car next to the dispatch building, when I noticed Edward and a couple of the other firemen tossing a football around in the grassy area behind the buildings. It was early March, but that didn't stop them from being out in the brisk evening air. I scurried from my car toward the building, hoping not to gain any attention.
"B! Wait up!"
Ugh … just what I didn't want.
"B … please?" Edward begged, reaching for my wrist as I hesitated by the door.
I didn't know what to say to him. I just looked at him, begging with my eyes that he would just say whatever it was that he wanted to say without making me ask.
"B … I … shit, I hope you're not angry with me. I think you've been avoiding me for the last week or so, and I just hope that you're not mad."
I couldn't tell if he was apologizing or not. I was the one who attempted to kiss his cheek for crying out loud … why would he have to apologize? Again, words escaped me and I just shook my head in response.
"You're not angry?"
I shook my head again.
"Okay … you're not angry, but you're not exactly talking to me either."
"I'm sorry, Edward, I have to get to work. Can we talk later?"
Edward nodded this time and I turned to the door and let myself in with my keycard.
It was a busy evening, and I'm sure the guys were bummed that their impromptu football game ended abruptly, but one of the local warehouses caught fire and they were the first to be called to the scene. As always, I kept an ear on the scanner to make sure that Edward was okay. Relief flooded my being as I heard his voice on the scanner.
When Edward's crew returned, it was close to the end of my shift, but there was nothing in the world like watching him walk down the hall covered in ash and soot as he ran his hands through his wild hair. Dirty and tired, he was still the most beautiful man I'd ever seen.
I don't think he noticed me walking toward the door when he stopped in the hallway and leaned his forehead against the wall.
"Is everything alright, Edward?"
He chuckled. "Jesus, B. Now look who's sneaking up on people."
"Sorry. I'm heading home. We'll catch up another time okay?"
"Sure. Can I walk you out?"
I laughed. Edward was always the gentleman.
"I'm a big girl, but you can if you'd like."
He nodded and opened the door, ushering me out into the parking lot. Edward patiently waited as I unlocked my car and threw my bag into the passenger seat.
There was so much more that I wanted to say to this man—that I was glad that he came back in one piece, unharmed, that I relished the short moments like this where it seemed like he cared.
Edward started to say something, but was interrupted by the shrill ring inside the firehouse.
"Shit, B. I need to talk to you … soon okay?"
I just nodded, as he turned and ran back inside.
"B, I'm so sorry. I've had last minute meetings all morning."
"Alice, it's okay. I actually just sat down myself. I ordered us each a diet Coke."
"That just sounds perfect."
The waitress brought our drinks and took our orders. We each ordered a grilled chicken salad and fell back into comfortable conversation.
"So, everything set for Friday night?"
"B, I'm so excited. Everything is going to be perfect."
"Alice I'm so proud of you. Everyone is going to love you."
"B, you okay with all this?"
"Of course. Why wouldn't I be?"
"B, you know exactly what I'm talking about."
"Alice, I would rather have root canal then strut down a runway. But I'll be okay, I'm a big girl."
"You need to stop being so hard on yourself. You have a fabulous body. I would love to have curves like you."
"You say that now, but I bet you wouldn't when you had the extra pounds," I said, fidgeting with my soda glass.
"You're wrong you know? I see how men look at you, B. I see how my brother looks at you."
My head jerked up from staring at the table as I glared at Alice. "What did you say?"
"I'm not blind, you know. Edward thinks he hides it, but I see everything—the way he lights up when you walk in the room or the smile on his face when someone says your name. I've noticed for some time how he looks at you with so much love and affection. But my real question is how long have you loved him?"
"B, it's me, you know you can talk to me. Besides just like Edward, you don't hide it well."
I say just above a whisper, "Since high school."
"Aww, B. Why didn't you tell me?"
"How was I supposed to tell you? Hey Alice, by the way I think your brother is hot. I mean it's your brother. Besides, why waste my time when he wouldn't be interested."
"Why would you think that? Did you not hear me at all?"
"Alice, I've known him as long as you. Of course he cares."
"B, he loves you. And not just as a friend, I mean really loves you."
"You don't know that."
"Yes, I do. Umm … B, he told me."
I was about to call bullshit on Alice, when the waitress arrived with our food. I was actually glad for the interruption, but still curious about what Alice had said.
The rest of lunch was quiet, and Alice never broached that subject again. We talked more about the show and what I needed to do. Alice let me know what was expected of me and when I needed to arrive. I was so worried about having to walk down a runway in front of everyone, that I hadn't given any thought to any of the other torture I'd be subjected to. Alice told me I'd have to get there a full two hours early just to get my hair and makeup done. Two hours!
After Alice and I parted, what we had talked about before really started to sink in. She said that Edward had told her that he loved me. Why would he tell her but not me? I mean, how could he love me? I wasn't anyone special. I'm not beautiful—granted I can get by without a bag over my head but essentially I'm still the same person I was when I first met him, just older and wiser. So what changed?
I tried to nap before going into work that evening, but I just couldn't get the conversation with Alice out of my head. By the time I got to work, I was already miserable and just wanted to focus on my job. At the end of my shift, I just wanted to go home and collapse into bed.
I saw Edward that night a total of three times. Each time my heart would pound out of my chest, but our interaction was nothing more than a wave on his part as he came and went on calls from the station.
When I got home from my shift on Friday morning, I fell into my bed, knowing that if I didn't at least get some sleep, Alice would kill me if I had bags under my eyes. The last thing I wanted to do was fall over as I was walking down the runway.
At four o'clock, I found myself walking into the venue to sit down for two hours of torture.
"B! You look GREAT! Thank you SO much for doing this!" Alice squealed.
I turned to look in the mirror to find myself actually looking at myself. Really looking. For once, I actually liked what I saw. I wasn't some overdone, over-coiffed, fake person who didn't look like themselves. I was just me.
My hair was put into hot rollers and it hung down around my shoulders in loose waves. I was wearing a plum colored wrap dress that made my cleavage look great, waist small and hips not so wide. The bra and panty set they put me in was beautiful and fantastic- a lot sexier than my usual cotton underwear. I had to smile because I actually felt very pretty in them, even if no one else knew I had them on.
Alice just smiled at me.
"You'll be fine, B. And I've told you before that what you put under your clothes is just as important as the clothes you put on. Have you seen your boobs? A great bra does wonders for your cleavage. You look fantastic, and I've personally chosen everything you'll be wearing tonight."
She kissed me on the cheek and quickly hurried off. I'm sure she was interested to see if any buyers were in the audience and where they were from.
Before I knew it, Alice was out at the podium making her speech and explaining to the audience what types of fabrics she'd used and what they could expect from her designs. I almost lost my lunch when she dedicated her new line to me, saying I was her inspiration. She went on about how she wanted to make me feel sexy and beautiful, since I had the inability to believe how everyone truly saw me.
Alice was finished and all too soon my feet were carrying me down the runway. I tried to stay focused as blubs flashed around me, and I knew I couldn't even think about being nervous or both Alice and I would be completely screwed.
I made it out in the six designs that Alice chose for me, all of them lovely and comfortable. She knew exactly how to make me feel beautiful.
I was just changing out of the last outfit when Alice stuck her head in my dressing room.
"B, there is a reception in the lobby. Put that plum dress back on and come enjoy."
"Are you sure, Alice? I mean, the other girls are heading home."
"I know. They were paid to be here; you were not. You're my friend and you did a huge favor for me tonight. Please come to the reception. I know the buyers are out there waiting to see me, and I need the support of my best friend. Please?"
"Of course, Alice!" I hugged her quickly.
"Do you know where the buyers are from?"
Alice rattled off a few of the larger department stores and a few boutiques I wasn't familiar with, but were apparently very popular. It all made me very excited for her.
I pushed her off to greet her guests with the promise that I would join her in a few moments.
I had no idea there would still be a room full of people milling about after the show. Waiters were coming around with refreshments, and I gladly took a glass of champagne off the tray. Soon, I felt a warm hand on my lower back and breath in my ear.
"You look incredible tonight."
"Edward. Hi, I wasn't expecting you to be here. I mean, I know you were coming to the show, I just didn't expect you to stay for this."
"B, I wasn't expecting you to be modeling either. But it was a good surprise. You looked beautiful. I mean … you always look beautiful, but up there on the stage you owned it."
I couldn't stop the blush from overtaking my chest and cheeks.
"Edward, you don't have to say those things."
"Yes I do, B. It's absolutely true. Can we go somewhere and talk maybe?"
"Well, umm maybe. Let me find Alice. I promised her I'd be here to support her if she needed me."
"My parents are still here. They won't leave until she tells them its okay."
Edward placed his hand on the small of my back and guided me out of the lobby to a small terrace. Just the simple gesture and heat of his hand on my back did weird things to me. My nerves kicked up a notch while my stomach was in knots.
We finally came to a small bench, and Edward gestured for me to sit first. I took a seat, placing my hands in my lap, and turned to him. The silence was too much, but before I was able to speak a word, Edward was the first to speak.
"Bella, I like you. I've liked you ever since I could remember, but it's more, so much more."
"What are you saying?"
Edward pulled my hand from my lap and placed it in both of his, rubbing his thumb along the knuckles in a soothing motion.
"I'm saying … I was too blind to see what was in front of me all long. I want you and me-us."
I was so shocked by Edward's words that all coherent thoughts had left my brain. I couldn't even form the words I wanted to say.
"Bella, please … say something."
Edward had never called me Bella in all the years I've known him. I was still shocked by what was said, but the look of sadness on Edward's face snapped me out of my comatose state.
"Oh, Edward, I'm sorry. It's just that I've waited so many years to hear those words come from your mouth, that I'm still in a state of shock."
"It's okay, I think I'm-"
"There you are, sweetie. I was looking all over for you," Esme said, as she walked over to us.
Edward stood to greet his mom, and over Esme's shoulder I could see Alice mouth I'm sorry and I just nodded.
Esme looked from Edward to me and back at Edward again. "I'm sorry, was I interrupting something?"
"Well…" Edward started to say but I grabbed his hand on instinct and squeezed gently.
"It's fine Esme, we were just talking."
"Bella you are so beautiful tonight. I'm so proud of you." Esme pulled me in for a warm hug.
"Thank you Esme. That really means a lot."
Esme looked between us again and had a huge grim on her face like she was hiding something. "Well I'll let you get back. I just wanted to say goodbye before we leave."
"Leaving already?" Edward asked.
"You know we can't keep up with you young people. Besides, Dad needs his beauty sleep."
Edward hugged his mom and I thought I heard Esme whisper in his ear something about being good to her.
After Esme left, Edward turned back to me and extended his hand out to me and instinctively I placed my hand in his. He pulled me to his side, which made me happy and giddy and I sighed in contentment.
"You wanna get out of here? Maybe go back to my place, chill, talk."
My eyebrow raised in question as I looked at him and saw the nervousness in his eyes.
"I really just wanna be alone with you. I feel like we wasted so many years."
My heart skipped a beat and I could see the love shown in his eyes. "I'd really like that."
I giggle. "Yes, Edward. Really."
Edward pulled me so I was flush against his chest, looking up into the most brilliant emerald eyes I'd ever seen.
"Can I kiss you?"
"Yes, "I said just above a whisper.
And just like that, his lips descended on mine and I was lost in the heat of the kiss. His lips were soft and warm as they moved against mine in a slow passionate kiss. The feel of his tongue tracing my lower lip learning the shape of my mouth made me gasp, but without hesitation I took it into my mouth. When our tongues touched, a fire began deep in my belly bringing on the most intimate of feelings.
Our lips continued to move against each others, coaxing and tasting each other. It was like we put all our feelings in to that one kiss. I didn't want it to ever end, but Edward was the first to pull away, leaning his forehead to mine.
"You don't know what you do to me, Bella."
"Mmm. Let me grab my things and then we can get out of here, because I want you to tell me all about that."
Edward held my hand as I led him back to the dressing areas to grab my things. Ever the gentleman, he took my duffle bag and slung it over his shoulder.
"Is that everything?"
"Yep. Let's get out of here."
Edward led me out to the parking lot toward his truck.
"Edward … what about my car? Maybe I should just follow you."
He nodded and walked me to my car. He threw my bag in the backseat, and pulled me toward him, kissing me again.
I giggled. "Edward, we'll never get to your place if we keep this up. Now go. I'll follow you."
Fifteen minutes later, we pulled up in front of Edward's little house. He swiftly jumped out of his truck and met me at my door. He pulled me into his arms for a quick hug and a soft kiss and then led me up the front walk and onto the porch.
Before I knew it, I was standing just inside the front door slipping off my shoes.
"Do you want a glass of wine or a beer maybe?"
"Umm, I'll have whatever you're having."
I heard his chuckle from the kitchen. "Sam Adams it is then. Make yourself comfortable, Bella."
Edward brought in the beers and set them on the coffee table and then built a fire in the fireplace.
"Sorry, it's still a little chilly in here. If you're cold, you can grab that blanket off the chair."
I was chilly so I grabbed the blanket and tucked it around me as I settled in on the sofa.
Edward came and sat next to me, quietly asking me to share the blanket with him. For a moment, he just looked at me, the glow of the fire darkening his eyes.
"I'm still absorbing that you're here, that's all. I wasn't sure how you felt about me."
"Edward, I've liked you since I was fourteen years old," I murmured, picking at the frayed edges of the blanket.
"Why didn't you ever say anything, Bella? Things could have been so different if you had."
"Because, Edward. How could you ever like someone like me that way, let alone love me?"
"What do you mean 'someone like you'?"
"I'm nothing special, Edward. You could find plenty of girls that have the entire package—skinny, petite, and pretty."
Edward chuckled darkly.
"Bella … you are the entire package. You're beautiful—you always have been—and you're smart, funny, caring and you have the biggest heart I've ever known. It's that big heart of yours that got you up on that runway tonight. If Alice wasn't your best friend, you wouldn't have done it. You looked so sexy up there on that catwalk."
"It's true that I wouldn't have done it for anyone but Alice. But my heart isn't the only thing about me that's big." I frowned, picking at the blanket again.
"Bella … I'm willing to bet there isn't a part of you that isn't absolutely gorgeous. Do you need me to prove it to you?" Edward smirked.
My heart was beating so fast I thought it would beat through my chest. There wasn't anything in Edward's eyes or on his face that indicated he was lying. This was how he truly felt, laying it all out for me. He wanted to be here with me, he said he didn't want to waste any more time. I wished that it was easier for me to believe what everyone else told me.
Edward's face became full of concern.
"Bella, talk to me. You got lost in your own thoughts there for a minute."
"I'm sorry Edward … I was just thinking … maybe I do need you to prove it to me, to show me how you really feel; because I just don't feel worthy of it."
Edward leaned over and cupped my face in his hands and kissed me sweetly. His warm, wet tongue tracing my lip as my own tongue met him in the middle and tangled with his. Before the kiss went further Edward took my hands and pulled me up from the sofa leading me over to the big fluffy rug in front of the fireplace.
He grabbed a few pillows from the sofa, throwing them down on the rug. He sat and pulled me down onto my knees in front of him and gently pulled on the tie that held my dress around me.
Keeping one hand on my hip, he gently kissed my belly. "Beautiful," he whispered.
I felt the heat rise in my neck and cheeks and tried to pull away.
"Bella, don't hide from me. Please … let me show you how beautiful your body is."
Words eluded me so I just simply nodded.
The plum dress I was wearing fell from my body to a pile on the floor, leaving me in only the sexy underwear I was given. The bra and panties were a matching black set with soft lace at the top of the cups and along the waistband.
"God, Bella. You're so sexy."
Edward took my lips in a searing kiss. It was hard and fast and nothing sweet about it but he slowly started to pepper kisses from my lips, down my neck and finally to my shoulder. He slipped the bra strap aside and kissed along my shoulder, down my chest to the tops of my breasts.
My bra conveniently had a front clasp, and with the flick of his wrist it was open and falling from my shoulders. He gently cupped my breasts. "These are what dreams are about-full, plump," he rubbed a thumb across my nipples, "perfect."
He lowered his head to take a nipple in his mouth, and I was done. I had wanted him to touch me like this for so long that I couldn't believe it was happening. I was lost in all the sensations.
"Shh, baby. I'm not even close to being done."
After paying the same respect to my other breast, he shimmied down my body leaving a trail of hot kisses as he said over and over how beautiful I was. He stopped at my belly, tracing his tongue around my belly button, then along the waistband of my panties.
"As much as I think these are sexy … they must go."
Edward hooked his fingers in the side of my panties and slid them down exposing me in more ways than one. He slipped his hands beneath my bottom, squeezing both cheeks while lifting me higher.
"This drives me insane. The way your butt looks as you walk away." He squeezed again for good measure.
"And you," he licked my slit, "taste better than honey."
I gasped as he latched onto my clit. It was slow torture as he sucked and licked, driving me to the brink only to stop then start again.
"Edward please … stop teasing."
"Baby, tell me what you want."
"I want you."
Edward stood and pulled his shirt over his head then worked on his pants and boxers. How did I not notice he was still clothed? Oh right, he was worshiping my body with his mouth.
As the last of his clothing hit the floor, I stared in awe at his amazing body-broad muscled shoulders, tight abs, narrow waist and hips, a light brush of hair that lead to a generous-sized cock. He was one gorgeous man and right now he was all mine.
Edward took my hand, pulling me to stand in front of him. He kissed me sweetly, then lifted me in his arms.
"Edward, what are you doing?"
"Shh. I'm taking you to my bedroom where I can love you properly."
Edward just laughed and kept walking.
Edward laid me on the bed and hovered over my body, his cock inches from where I wanted him most. He balanced himself as he placed his hands on either side of my head and kissed me once.
"I love you, Bella. Please let me show you how much."
I had longed to hear those words for so long that I choked on a sob as a tear slid down my cheek.
"Baby, don't cry." Edward wiped a tear with his thumb.
"Oh Edward. Please … make love to me."
"Are you sure?"
I grabbed his face in my hands. "I've never been more sure in my entire life. I think I've loved you since I first laid eyes on you. Now… make love to me."
"I love you so much."
Edward took my lips in a seductive kiss as he entered me. He was larger than any other man I'd been with, and it took a minute to adjust to his size. We both moaned once he filled me completely, reveling in the feeling of finally coming together.
"Bella, you feel so good."
I instantly wrapped my legs around his waist as he started to move. I met him thrust for thrust, bringing my clit in contact with his pelvis. I could feel my orgasm building in my belly as his thrusts became shorter and harder.
Edward fingered my clit as he drove faster and more urgently, bringing my orgasm right to the edge.
"Oh Edward … fuck … your cock feels soo good."
"Bella, I'm not gonna last."
With one more thrust of his hips, I was crumbling and he was following right behind. I rode out my orgasm until I felt the last of him spill in me.
Edward collapsed on top of me; the weight of him was deliciously comforting. The feeling of his skin on mine, covering me, the feel of him inside of me … indescribable.
"Baby, I'm sorry."
"Shh … Edward, you have nothing to be sorry for."
Edward carefully lifted his weight off of me and slowly pulled out. I missed him immediately. He pulled the blankets up over us as he wrapped me up in his embrace, whispering in my ear.
"You are beautiful, Bella. Never forget that. I love you so much."
"I love you, Edward."
I may not have always believed I was beautiful or loved, and still had to get over my insecurities, but with a man like Edward, anything was possible.