Title: Would You Remember Me?
Author: Heiwajima Shizuo.
Rating: E for everyone :3
Summary: When I die, would you remember me, Celty? Would you?
Would you remember me?
As we lie in bed together, while you sleep peacefully dreaming of sweet things, here I am next to you unable to sleep. No, it is not because I had a bad dream and am scared to close my eyes for what I may see.
It's just that next month is my birthday. And though I know it is normal for humans to grow up and mature, I am terrified.
I am terrified that these years with you will go by all too fast and before I know it, I'll be an old man, lying in my death bed with you sitting next to it looking the way you did when we first met.
If I could, I'd stay this way forever just to be with you.
As I blink my eyes, I sit up and lean against the backboard of our bed. The light from the moon drifts into our room; illuminating it beautifully and helping me see the figure next to me. Turning my head, I feel smile attack the corner of my lips; leaving me grinning girlishly.
You've always had that effect on me, you know.
Lying on her side, her perfect body facing me, Celty's chest inflates then deflates at an even pace as she sleeps. My eyes trail all over her body; my brown orbs going over her every line, embedding them into my mind so I never forget.
"You're so beautiful, Celty…" I bring a hand up to pull the covers over her curvy frame, sheltering her from the cold air floating in from our opened window. She never really liked the cold.
After taking one last look at Celty, I turn my head and find a place on the wall across the room.
Though I know I am nowhere near that of being an old man, being with you, Celty, makes time fly irrevocably fast. I love the time spend with you, but at the same time, I know growing this attached to you isn't good. But you growing attached to me is worse because when I die, you'll still be alive and alone with nothing but my memory to keep you company.
And living in the world we are both in now, beings like you won't treated equally.
It makes me wonder, without me around… who will be there for you?
Who will be your shoulder to cry on? Who will be there to hold you when you're scared? Who will tell you its ok when you're worried? Who will be there to comfort you when upset? Who will be there to tell you just how beautiful you are, with or without your head? Just who will be there to remind you of how wonderful you truly are?
Who will tell you they love you?
Even if I'm still alive, Celty, I am sorry. I promised you I'd never leave you but no one can escape death. Once it comes, it comes and once I die, you'll have to go on living alone and I know you hate that—you hate being alone. But I hope you know that if I could live forever, I would just to spend it with you. Unfortunately, us humans live a short life and we all end up burried. And eventually, are bodies end up decaying until we're nothing but dust.
To tell you the truth, I can't help but wonder… When I die, would you remember me, Celty?
Lately, that thought has been all I've been able to think about as my birthday draws closer and closer.
I don't want you to forget me.
I really, really don't.
But I know that one day, long after I die, your memory of me will fade until you won't be able to remember me at all. Probably to the point where you start to question if I was just a dream. As my body starts to deteriorate into nothing, you'll go on with your everyday life with no recollection of me at all.
The thought hurts, really.
I want you to remember me for as long as you live. Whether you live for a hundred or thousand years, I want you to be able to remember me clearly.
Suddenly, something wet hits my arm and I quickly realize that I am crying.
"How embarrassing. This is so unlike me…" I mumble, as I bring a hand up to wipe the tears away, a sad smile on my lips.
I'm never one to cry, but the thought of you forgetting me… it makes my heart clench and tighten uncomfortably because I know for as long as I live, I will never forget you. I couldn't forget you even if I tried because you've had me since the day we met. It just wasn't until I was a teen that I realized how much I really did love you.
Growing up, I always tried to get you to notice me. And now that I think about it, the things I did to just get you to notice me when my father kept you for experiments—I was so desperate for your attention, it was comical, really.
Even though I was a mere child, with no knowledge of love or the world, I knew there was something special about you.
It wasn't because you were a headless being. It wasn't because you were over a hundred years old. It wasn't because of the black smoke that floated out from your neck. It wasn't anything like that. There was just something about you that I wanted to know; not about your body, you. And as we got to know each other, my curiosity when it came to you quickly turned into friendship and before I knew it, I had fallen in love with you by the time I was fifteen.
But just because I loved you, that didn't necessarily mean you loved me back, right?
I remember how much it hurt me—like they say, the first love hurts the most.
Or something like that.
I've never really been much for words.
Anyway, I remember how much it had upset me when you did not return my feelings right away. Now that I am older, I know I was stupid to think you'd tell me you loved me back right after I told you I loved you. But still, I was a teen and I had set myself up just for disappointment when those words were not returned.
But even though you saw me as only a best friend of some sorts, I continued to pursue you. I did all I could to make you love me until one day, a little while after I graduated from Raijin, you finally felt the same way I did for years.
I did so much—even beat myself up at times. But in the end, I knew you were too special to let go of. And the thought of not being able to be with you, after all of that… I don't like it at all.
Sniffling, eyes over flowing with tears, I turn to look at the sleeping woman next to me.
Despite the sad drops falling from my eyes, I can't help but smile.
After years and years of trying to get your attention, I finally have it—I finally have my dream girl and even if you don't have a head, Celty, you are the most beautiful girl in the world.
"I know you're sometimes insecure about not having a head, but I hope you know you are perfect the way you are right now… and there is nothing I would change about you." I turn my head away from her to look across the room once more.
Damn this human body of mine! Because of it, I can't be with Celty for as long as I'd like.
And the thought of ever being away from you is enough to bring me to tears.
Shifting downward into a lying position, I bring the sheets up to my shoulders and cover myself. I can't be so sad when I'm nowhere close to dying yet. I am only twenty-three! Why should I be so sad about leaving Celty when I still have another sixty or so years left?
Turning onto my side to face Celty, I wipe the last tear that rolls down my face before closing my eyes. The room is dead silent with the exception of our clock ticking and ticking.
"Would you remember me, Celty?" I murmur quietly before slowly falling asleep, my heavy eye lids closing.
I was inspired to write this when I watched Up. Like the part where the wife died and the old man was by himself. /Tear tear. It made me think of these two because it's safe to say that Celty would out live Shinra, and well, yeah.
Haha, anyways, tell me what you think? :3