A/N: Look, I found a story that I neglected to post, just a teensy one, but something. I'm still working on the big one, Hot Pursuit. Made some good progress on my week off.
"I want to make it clear, for the record, that I don't hate pineapple," Danny Williams said decisively. "My partner might try to tell you otherwise, but I never said I hate pineapple. It has its place — in fruit salad, in Jell-O, pineapple upside down cake, even on those tropical umbrella drinks that people (McGarrett) like to force me to drink, and then pay for.
"It has its place. That place is not on pizza, with or without ham. On pizza, pineapple is an abomination. It's a well-known fact anywhere east of California. Fruit on pizza — ehhh." He made a negative noise like a game show buzzer.
"It also does not belong on hamburgers and hotdogs. Make teriyaki chicken if you want. Sweet and sour pork, OK. But leave it off your burger! A little lettuce, a little tomato — burgers don't need much, just good beef, not pineapple! And hotdogs! I couldn't believe it when I saw pineapple relish on dogs! It's almost un-American to put pineapple on hotdogs."
"But, like I said, I have no problem with pineapple in the proper place and my daughter loves pineapple in fruit salad. So I bought a pineapple. Back in Jersey, I opened pineapple with a can opener, but Hawaii opened my eyes to fresh. It really does taste better here.
"I know why, because I have, unfortunately, had to chase suspects through spiky pineapple fields. Hawaii doesn't export pineapples any more — unless you count tourists carrying boxes marked 'Dole' on airplanes. The fruit has full time to ripen here and it's so much sweeter than anywhere else.
"So I thought I'd slice a fresh pineapple. I thought, how difficult could it be?" Danny said ruefully.
"And your hand slipped," the nurse guessed, as she finished cleaning the scrapes on the inside of Danny's arm. He'd avoided the knife, but not the rough skin of the pineapple. His arm looked like he'd used a cheese grater on it.
"The pineapple slipped," Danny corrected.
"You need a good sharp knife," the Hawaiian woman offered. "And you need to cut the top and bottom off to make a stable cutting surface." She began to tape a bandage across the wounds.
"I think I'm done with cutting pineapples," Danny said.
"Do you hate pineapple now?"
"No, but I'll leave cutting them to my partner. He's really good with knives."