So sorry for the delay, but university life has been so hectic. I humbly apologize.
Thank you to all who read and reviewed my story. I was really touched by your comments and advice. And to those who were wondering if this was really my first fanfiction. Then yes it is, I promise. By the way this is AU, so Ellie is now aware of Chuck and his spy life. She found out at the end of season 4.
I apologize in advance for errors. I'm doing this while I'm learning for mid-terms.
Once again please read and review.
I do not own Chuck, because if I did we would definitely get a season 5 and steamer scenes with Chuck and Sarah.
Oh by the way please support Chuck in getting a season 5. Go to all polls and cast your vote. C'mon we will never get anymore Chuck and Sarah scenes if you don't.
Sarah felt the warm sun of Burbank, California settle upon her skin. She woke up smiling and it was new for her. Over the past six months she woke up dreading the day, but now she embraced it. She thought back to all the many places in the world she woke up in, and felt the sun hit her skin. But the sun of this place gave her only one notion. This was her home, here with Chuck. It felt good but not as good as the warmth of Chuck's body on her, she thought.
She sprung up out of bed to find that Chuck was not in bed with her. She searched the room looking for any evidence of him being with her last night, but to no avail. She became frantic as the thought of him not being there, and at the thought of last just being a dream, overwhelmed her. She looked down at herself and found his black 'nerd' shirt still on her.
"NO, no, no. This can't be happening!" she screamed as she ran out of the room. She looked on the floor to see if his dog tags were where she dropped them last night. But no, they weren't there. Her body began to tremble and she felt herself slowly losing consciousness. Until she stepped out into the hallway and walked, or rather ran, down to the kitchen.
As she turned to her left, she slowly felt her heart calm down. There he was, hanging upside down from the exercise bar Awesome used when he and Ellie used to live here. Wait a minute….. Chuck was exercising. Sara could not believe it. He was actually doing upside down sit ups. His body was glistening with sweat. Sarah watched as beads of sweat rolled down the crevasses on his body. He pulled himself up once more and then jumped down from the bar. She watched him as he stretched out his body, flexing all of his new muscles. The bright sun shone directly on his body, revealing a new tan to it. He was no more the skinny, pale Chuck. Now he was this toned, tanned Chuck.
She walked up to him from behind. She raised her fingers to slowly draw small circles on his back, and then she placed gentle kisses on his warm skin. She loved the way he smelled. To many people one could never love another's smell of sweat. But Chuck had an almost fragrant smell of sweat. She'd never found that on any other man in her life. Some people may find it disgusting, but not her. Sarah inhaled deeply and then exhaled her very own warm breathe back onto his back.
"Hey you. Sorry, did I wake you?" he asked her as she tangled her arms around his torso, hugging herself closer to him from behind.
"No." she says, but her voice seems funny to Chuck. So he turns around to find Sarah's face drenched with tears. He looks at her worriedly and asks, "Sarah, honey you okay? What happened?" Sarah does not at first realize what he is talking about, until she touches her own face and feels the tears on her cheeks.
"Oh! I….. I woke up…. and you weren't there….. so I was freaking out… and then I guess I started crying. I was not even aware until now." She tells him through laughter and more tears. Chuck holds her more firmly at the base of her back with one hand, and uses his other hand to tenderly wipe away her tears.
"Sarah, I'm not going anywhere. I promise. I am here now and forever. Okay? So no more crying and freaking out. C'mon you know I can't see you cry." She nodded and agreed with him. She nestled her head under his chin and held onto him tightly. Chuck rubbed his hands over her back to comfort her. Once they had their little heart to heart, Sarah preceded to find out more about Chuck's training.
"So, what's up with the exercising? You never ever exercised in your life and now you're doing things that Awesome used to do. Are you sure your body if built for this?" she asked out of pure concern for his health.
He laughed at her, "Well, in Panama we did some severe training and a requirement was to put on some muscle. So, I had to let my body adapt. It's not that bad is it?" he asked her as she squinted at his question. Sarah raised her hand and smacked Chuck on his head.
"C'mon, Chuck are you serious? Have you even looked at yourself in the mirror? I have no idea what Ellie is going to say. Or even Morgan for that matter. Well I can tell you one thing Awesome is going to be over the moon." They both laughed at the prospect of Awesome being completely overjoyed. Chuck's face then turned serious as he held Sarah at the waist and slowly rubbed circles on her skin.
He stuttered out, "What… what about….. what about you, Sarah? What do you think?" Chuck looked deep into Sarah's eyes. He was trying to read her, trying to decipher what she thought about him. Sarah brought her hands up to rest on his cheeks. She stared into his eyes and she herself tried to read him.
"Well. To me Chuck, it doesn't matter what you look like on the outside. Just as long as your still the same Chuck on the inside. Remember you promised me that you wouldn't change?" he nodded as he recalled the promise he had made to her. She continued, "Well then that's all I need. But I can tell you that this is definitely a sight I can get used to. Looks like I'm going to be fighting off flocks of girls that are going to be continuously hitting on you. I'm gonna have to bring out the GIANT BLONDE SHE-MALE."
"Wow, was that a joke? Sarah Bartowski, have you developed a sense of humor in my absence?" Chuck jokingly asked her whilst beginning a tickle attack on her body. They both laughed so hard until Chuck stopped and gathered Sarah in his arms, then out of the blue he just hugged her. He squeezed her against his body, holding on so tightly. To him, being able to hold Sarah felt like home and nothing else. Sarah smiled to herself and rubbed his back comforting him.
Once they untangled from each other, Chuck brought his forehead to rest on Sarah's. Sarah then took the opportunity to ask Chuck a question, "Hey, you know we're gonna have to talk about what happened in Panama, right?"
"What do you mean?"
"You have to talk about it Chuck. The worst thing you could ever do is keep it inside. It won't be good for you. You have to let me in." with that Chuck completely let go of Sarah and tried his best to evade her question saying, "Look at me. I'm all sweaty and getting it on you. I should probably go in the shower." Sarah could not believe he just turned down an offer to talk. She knew right there that things had changed. Chuck kissed her on the forehead and walked off to the bathroom.
As he walked away Sarah whispered to herself, "Don't shut me out Chuck. Please don't do that."
She shook her head and tried her best not to cry. Once Chuck was in the shower she took a moment to compose herself. She walked over to his luggage bag and decided to sort through his clean and dirty clothes. The proper thing to do as wife, she thought. Sarah placed herself on the floor and opened the bag. His clothes were neatly folded in the bag. She took out the clothes occasionally taking a sniff of them. His scent remained on them as Sarah inhaled deeply.
As she sorted through the bag she went right to the bottom where she found his firearm. At first she thought it was his regular tranq gun, but not this time. In her hands she held a real firearm. Quite like the one she and Casey carried around. She could not believe it. Chuck never carried a real gun, she thought to herself. And what made it worse was that the gun was fully loaded.
Could he actually have changed, she thought to herself. Is he the same Chuck? She could not fathom the prospect of Chuck being different. She slowly began to tremble and before it got out of control she put the gun back in the bag along with his clothes, stood up and walked off to the kitchen to prepare breakfast. "Breathe Sarah. Just breathe. Nothing's changed he's still the same Chuck. He is still your Chuck," Sarah told herself as she gathered ingredients from the cupboard and fridge, occasionally taking moments to collect her breath.
Ten minutes later she heard the bathroom door open. Chuck walked out of the bathroom in just his towel hanging lowly on his waist. Sarah had her back turned to him as she continued frying eggs and beacon. Chuck took a moment to watch her in his shirt and nothing else. He gazed upon her long legs that went on for miles and her perfect ass that only God could have made. He approached her gradually. Once he was in touching distance he grabbed her waist and wrapped his arms around, bringing his chin to rest on her right shoulder. Chuck placed a gentle kiss on her neck.
"Hey, beautiful. That smells amazing." She did not respond.
"Look Sarah, honey, I'm so sorry about before. I didn't mean to disregard you like that. It's just hard to talk about these things. But that does not mean I don't want to talk about it with you. Please just give me some time to settle in. Then I promise you that I'll answer any and every question you have." A smile broke onto Sarah's face. Now here's the Chuck I remember, Sarah said to herself.
"I understand the importance of getting it all out. My training partner, she told me the same thing on the flight back home." He explained to her. The word of 'she' jolted Sarah to complete awareness. Her body tensed at the sound of the word.
"She?" Sarah asked.
"Yeah. My training partner, Camille Greyson. She explained that I have to talk about these things with my wife. She said that it was imperative. And I promised her that I'd do it." Sarah could not believe what she was hearing. He promised another woman that he'd talk to his wife. That he'd talk to her about this! Sarah was fuming on the inside. Who the hell was this woman? Why did she think, she had to make Chuck promise to tell me about this?
Chuck instantly realized where Sarah's mind was going. He quickly shook her out of her thoughts and explained, "Woah, Sarah. I know where your head is going and don't even think about it. Camille was just my training partner. She knew, well everyone knew I was married. And that was because I could not shut up about you. Sarah, you know you're the only one for me, right?"
Her body instantly relaxed against his. The thought of Chuck constantly talking about her to this Camille girl, brought an instant smile onto her face. Chuck glided his fingers to the side of her neck; he wiped her hair off her shoulders and then placed light kisses on her neck at the same time saying, "I….. love you….. Sarah…. always have….. and I….. always will."
With that Sarah tilt her head backward to allow Chuck better access to her neck. All thoughts of what happened ten minutes ago were pushed aside. Chuck used one of his hands to take the frying pan off the stove. Then he brought his hand back to her stomach, where he placed it under her shirt. Sarah positioned her right hand on Chuck's head that was perched on her right shoulder. She dug her fingers into the base of his neck; as she edged him on to kiss her more. She used her left hand to massage his hand on her stomach.
Chuck then turned her around quickly. As Sarah was turned around, her breath caught. She saw Chuck in just his towel, which was barely covering anything, standing in front of her. She licked her lips seductively and her eyes became hooded. Chuck attacked her lips with fervor. He kissed her hard. Quickly dipping his tongue into her mouth. Sarah didn't protest, in fact she swept her very own tongue along the palate of Chuck's mouth. Sarah arched her back into the kiss. Her arms hung loosely around Chuck's neck. With one swift movement Chuck picked Sarah up into his arms. She snaked her legs around his back and locked her ankles. He then placed her softly on the kitchen countertop. In all this time never not once letting go of her mouth.
Sarah sat at the edge of the countertop with Chuck placed perfectly between her legs. She could feel his erection directly on her. The towel definitely did not conceal much. He kissed her with all his might. Chuck was somehow trying to pour all he felt into the kiss. He ever so slightly glided his tongue over hers, eliciting a moan from deep within Sarah's throat. He moved his hand to grip Sarah from under her knee, pulling her closer to him. He then used the other hand to tilt her body backward.
Sarah's head fell back as Chuck's tongue now slid off her mouth. He moved all the way down her jaw, to her neck. Where he caressed, nibbled and pecked her. Sarah used her very own hands and smoothed them all over his back. She felt out his muscles, and then she proceeded to dip her fingers into the back of his towel. She grabbed hold of his ass firmly. Chuck's eyes flew open in shock. He watched Sarah smile contently at the feel of his ass. Her eyes were still shut but Chuck could not help but just stare at her.
He knew she deserved an answer for every question she asked him. And he promised himself right at that moment he would answer all her questions. Only problem is, it might take some time.
As Chuck lost himself in his thoughts, Sarah made headway of releasing him from his towel. He pulled her once more closer to him, causing Sarah to open her mouth briefly for air. She brought her fingers out of the towel. Then glided them around the edge to open it and drop it to the floor. She opened her eyes and found those loving chocolate browns staring at her. As she smoothed her fingers around the edge of the towel, Chuck gazed into her eyes. He was trying to tell her exactly how sorry he was for before and that he was going to tell her everything.
Sarah looked at him, and then brought her nose to rub playfully against his. She smiled widely at him, and at the same time she used her eyes to calm Chuck down and tell him that she understood what was going on with him.
Just as she was about to drop the towel the front door opened.
"Hey Sarah, hey Chuck. Chuck!"It was none other Morgan Grimes himself. He always seemed to walk in on them at the most inopportune times. Chuck and Sarah barely registered what happened, so before either of them could get decent, more voices entered the apartment. "Morgan why are you screaming, Clara will wake up," Ellie scolded Morgan. The three Awesome's entered the apartment to quite a sight.
Chuck had Sarah pinned on the countertop with her legs hooked around his waist. Sarah had her fingers resting on the knot of Chuck's towel and Chuck was shirtless. Morgan was stuck staring at the two of them on the countertop. The Awesome's were well, shocked.
Ellie tried her best to look in another direction as her little brother, tighten the grip on his towel and Sarah jumped off the countertop. She tried her best to pull Chuck's shirt down to cover her exposed legs, but to no avail.
"Ellie. I… I was going… to come see you." Chuck tried to explain to his sister. The three intruders, well four including Clara, stared at the two love makers standing in front of them. Mostly the staring was for Chuck. They all scanned his new body with confused faces and mountains of questions storing at the tip of their tongues.
"Chuck. Hello biceps." Ellie tried to jokingly break the silence.
"Bro…. this is….. AWESOME!" Devon sang out loud with Clara in his arms.
"Buddy, where did this all come from?" Morgan worriedly asked Chuck.
Chuck and Sarah stared at them then at each other and back to them. The unassuming 'Chuck Bartowski' grin splayed upon Chuck's face. They both took a look at themselves, and then excused themselves from the crowd to change in their bedroom.
The married couple entered their bedroom in awkward silence at first, but once the door was closed they both burst out into laughter. Chuck and Sarah took a look at themselves in the mirror. They were disheveled from their make out session and as well as flustered. Chuck hung his arm around Sarah's shoulders and then said, "Well, thank God they did not walk in five minutes later." Sarah smiled and agreed.
She went to their closest to pick out a fresh pair of underwear and clothes, as she decided she's saunter of to the bathroom whilst Chuck caught up with his family. She took his shirt off and placed her gown on instead. As she began to head out to the bathroom opposite their room, Chuck pulled her to him.
"Chuck, not now. Not whilst your sister, brother in law, best friend and niece is in the other room." He laughed out loud at Sarah's assessment. He looked at her then placed his palm flat against her stomach. Sarah watched him quizzically as he took a deep gulp of air and asked, "Any regrets about last night?" Sarah looked shocked at his question it never occurred to her exactly what he was trying to say.
"Chuck don't be ridiculous. Why on earth would I have any…." She stopped mid sentence as she finally understood what he meant. "You're talking about….. about not…using the….. condom, right?" she whispered to him so no one could hear. Chuck smiled and nodded. She placed her hands over his and rubbed them softly. She looked down at their hands and said through teary eyes, "I will never regret anything about last night. Never Chuck! Whatever happens, happens. As long as we're together. You know I never ever considered that I'll be ready for motherhood, but I can tell you that over the last six months things have really changed in me. I don't know, I just feel different. And….. I like it."
Chuck watched her express herself to him. He saw the way her eyes moved, and watched the way her mouth curved into a little smile when she said she liked being this way. He brought his index finger to her chin and lifted it to bring them eye to eye. "As long as we're together," he repeated and sealed his promise with a kiss on her lips.
With that Sarah headed to the bathroom, whilst Chuck decided to get dressed. He put his blue Levi's jeans on and then went to search for a t-shirt. He realized his bag was still in the lounge so he prompted to look for one of his old t-shirts in the closest. Only problem was, was that all his old shirts were a little tight for him. After searching for a few minutes he decided to settle for a plan navy blue shirt Sarah had hanging on the chair. He looked himself over in the mirror and knew he was going to get flack for wearing it.
The navy blue t-shirt perfectly extenuated his biceps and six pack. He had to admit he did look good, but the drastic change was going to shock everyone waiting for him in the lounge. He brushed off the thought and walked out of the bedroom. He passed the bathroom, hearing Sarah in the shower, to enter the kitchen. There he found Morgan and Ellie fixing breakfast and Devon playing with Clara on the sofa. Chuck smiled widely as he took in the sight of his family. He missed them all so much and right now he felt a surge of happiness flow through him.
Ellie turned to him and smiled widely at her little brothers new look. She hugged and kissed him saying, "Now, I understand why Sarah wanted to keep you all to herself. I never knew this look could suit you little brother." Chuck could not exactly respond so all he did was let out a breath of air. Then Awesome interjected, "Dude, I'm really proud of you. You look, well…. AWESOME! You know we should train together. I have been feeling a little pudgy her and there. What you say bro?" Chuck nodded, kissed Clara on the forehead and then went over to take a plate of Ellie's famous full house breakfast. As he sat at the table it was Morgan's turn to interrogate him. Morgan came over and stole a piece of bacon from Chuck's plate.
"So, Chuck tell me about the training. Judging from the new look I'm guessing it was intense?" Morgan seemed extremely curious, which was nothing new. Chuck swallowed a piece of bacon and said, "Well, yeah. I guess it was, you can say that. But enough about me what about you guys? Anything new that I need to know about? How's Alex, you guys moving along okay?"
Morgan quickly spoke up. He was a little angry that Chuck seemed quite evasive about the issue. So he pressed on being the Morgan everyone knew and loved.
"We are all fine. Alex and I are going strong as ever. Clara is a beautiful growing flower. The Awesome's are well, awesome. So you are on par now. Tell me about the training Chuck Bartowski!" Chuck swallowed quickly. He felt a cool sheen of sweat developing on his neck. A few seconds later all eyes in the room were trained on him.
Then an idea popped up into his mind. He pulled out his phone and handed it to Morgan saying, "I took a few pics for you buddy. Maybe you can look at them and then we can talk later?" Morgan decided not to make the situation more uncomfortable as it already was, so he took the phone and began browsing through the pictures. Chuck took the moment as his queue and got up from the table.
He went over to Devon and took baby Clara from his hands. Chuck realized that he missed six months of her life and at that moment he considered what it would be like to miss six months of his own baby's life. Considering the events from last night he may have a little one on his way. He smiled at Clara and made silly faces eliciting giggles from deep within her belly. Chuck threw her up in the air and caught her. He was grateful that she didn't have any questions to ask him.
As he was playing with her Ellie called out to him from the kitchen. "So when did you get back? Judging from your suitcase by the door, I'm guessing not so long ago."
"Yeah. Got back about 10 hours ago. I was planning on coming to see you guys after settled in, but…." Ellie laughed as Chuck trailed off at the thoughts lingering in his mind. Ellie continued, "Yeah, well I'm betting Sarah just needed some alone time with you. Anyway, she needed that. Chuck I can't explain to you as to how much she missed you. I mean over the past few months she's really…. changed. I mean it."
"Yeah Bro, she's more like you now. Always talking…. even about kids and stuff. Looks like you're gona have your work cut out for you." Devon jokingly told Chuck.
Chuck could not believe what he was hearing. Sarah, his Sarah. Kick ass spy, talked to them about kids. Little did they know they may have already started a family with last night's performance, Chuck thought to himself. With all the talk about kids Chuck handed Clara over to Ellie and turned to Morgan who was unusually quiet. Just as Chuck approached him, he yelled out, "Woah Chuck, who is this babe? Dude, she's hot!" He turned the phone to Chuck so that he could see.
"HOT? BABE? Who?" The frantic words came from the passage. Sarah came out of the bathroom in jeans, red tank top and damp hair resting on her shoulders. Chuck should have been worried as his wife approached Morgan to see the phone, but he was too preoccupied staring at her. She looked fresh and completely gorgeous in Chuck's eyes. Sarah snatched the phone out of Morgan's hands and asked Chuck, "THIS is your training partner! This brunette woman! This is the woman you made that promise with?"
She turned the phone to Chuck to reveal a picture with him and Camille out in the field doing weapon training. She held a machine gun and so did Chuck. They were both standing back to back posing in an almost 'James Bond' kind of way. Sarah glided her finger over the screen to find pictures of Chuck in the gym doing weight lifting. "So who took these photos?" It was a rhetorical question as Sarah already knew it was this Camille girl taking pictures of her husband training.
Chuck gulped for air as he braced himself to explain his situation to Sarah. For a split second the room fell completely silent. Even Clara could feel the tension in the air, until a voice was heard at the door. "Walker, looks like you're gonna have to tighten the leash. Who knows, looks like now all the brunettes in town are going to be flocking at this very door." It was none other than Col. John Casey. As usual he always had to make an entrance. And he always loved to play around with Chuck and Sarah. They all turned their backs to welcome Casey.
"Well, Bartowski looks like you actually learnt something there. And I thought you could not last a day. From what I heard from Beckman, you really put your all into the work presented to you. Who knows you could even pass for a marine?" Casey told Chuck as he entered and shook his hand. Casey eyed Chuck over and almost gave a sense of approval and acknowledgement for all Chuck had gone through. "Not bad Bartowski, not bad at all."
Sarah however was not impressed with Casey's encouragement. She still held rage in her and was planning on exploding it when everyone left. The mood of the day was somehow lightened when Casey came over. Well, except for Sarah. They all sat at the table for a late breakfast, Chuck even had a second helping. Alex joined the bunch around noon. The group of 8 hung out in the apartment for the rest of the day. Devon brought over videos of Clara for Chuck. He couldn't believe how much he had missed. But what he did notice was that Sarah was in most of the videos, either carrying the baby or just in the background oohhhhing and aaaahhhhing.
Every now and then Chuck tried to get Sarah alone but she tactfully evaded him. However she did not disregard his hand when he reached out to hold hers. But Chuck could feel the tension in her body. He knew he needed straighten things out and explain his situation to Sarah. All he hoped for was a chance and God willing that she'd listen to him.
As the night drew to a close the group of 8 slowly dissipated. First with Casey, then Alex and Morgan. The Awesome's later decided to call it a night. Ellie hugged and kissed Chuck, then went over to Sarah. She pulled Sarah close and whispered in her ear, "I know what you're going through. But try not to be too hard on him. Give him time he will eventually open up." Sarah smiled at Ellie and thanked her for the advice. Chuck then took sleepy Clara into his arms and kissed her on the forehead. Sarah came over to Chuck's side and did the same. For a moment their eyes met and a sweet signal was exchanged between them. Ellie of course caught the signal and silent rejoiced at the two of them.
Five minutes later the apartment was almost empty. All that was left was Chuck and Sarah and a whole lot of awkwardness. Chuck sat back down on the couch and tried to break the silence. "I can't believe how much she's grown. She's absolutely adorable." Sarah looked at him smiled and just nodded. Just as she was about to walk away Chuck called out to her, "Sarah, don't go. Wait. We need to talk."
"Talk? Talk about what Chuck? Oh so you want to talk now! So we can only talk when YOU want to? Is that right?" Sarah knew she was being a little harsh, but she felt like she needed to get it off her chest.
"C'mon don't say it like that. I want to talk. For real this time, I promise." Chuck spoke softly to her. His eyes were gentle and sincere. Sarah was having a hard time holding up her façade.
"Okay Chuck. Talk!"
He was still on the couch and Sarah was standing by the door with her hands folded. Her look was serious. Chuck knew that everything had to come out tonight or else things were going to get bad. "Alright. I arrived in Panama and went straight to work. The first two weeks were extremely strenuous. And that was mostly because I was holding back. They wanted me to push further and harder…. but I knew if I did I was going to lose myself." Sarah could see the pain in his eyes, like he was hurting from the inside out. She wanted so desperately to console him, but she needed to hear this and he needed to say it.
"That's when I found out what they were going to do. I walked by the head office and overheard the captain's say that I was going to have to stay longer than six months, if things did not improve. They were going to keep me there for one year. And that's when something clicked in me. I realized that I had to find a way to get back to you." Sarah felt tears forming in her eyes. He did it all for her, she thought to herself. He allowed himself to go through torture and pain just for her.
"After that my training partner, Camille Greyson, and I came up with a plan." The sound of her name re-awoke the rage in Sarah. "We decided that the best way to get out of there and back to you, meant I was going to have to conform to their requests of me. And basically be the over achiever. That's why I did this to my body. I pushed my body to the limits; I never even knew I was capable of the things they were asking of me, but I just did them." Sarah's heart felt like it was jumping all over the place. How can one man love me so much, she asked herself? She knew that whatever was performed on the 'farm' was meant to be confidential, but of course she had to know what happened to him.
"You have no idea what I went through Sarah. What I had to do," Chuck explained to her. The whole time he just looked straight at the TV. Not once did he look in her eyes as she stood by the door way. She could see how much he was hurting. He stared at his hands in complete disbelief and shock. Chuck could not understand how he got to this point. "I'm a bad person, Sarah. My hands are stained with blood. I feel like I'm no longer me… and that's what scares me the most. If I can't recognize myself….. what must you be thinking?" Sarah watched him staring at his hands. Then a single tear fell from his eye to the floor.
Sarah ran to him. She knelt down in front of him, holding his hands saying, "You know what I see? A brave, courageous man. The same man that I met in the Buy More four years ago. Albeit, a different looking man, but the same man, with the same warm heart." He could not look into her eyes. Every time Sarah tried to lock eye contact with Chuck, he'd turn his head. "That's a lie Sarah! I'm not the same. How can you still love me?" he argued with her.
Sarah was shocked at the question he posed to her. Still on her knees in between his legs, she straightened her body and forced his face to come directly in line with hers. "Chuck don't do that, look at me. Please Chuck, look at me." He turned his head slowly and saw pain in her eyes as much as what was in his. Sarah just stared into his chocolate browns without saying a word. She used her thumb to wipe away his tears and then said in a very calm tone, "How can you say that Chuck? You can never doubt my love for you. It's never changing, but always growing. I know what they made you do, made you doubt yourself. But you can never hesitate about my love for you. You are the same, Chuck. Don't let them make you forget that." She leaned her forehead against his as her very own tears fell from her eyes.
"How can you be so sure?" he asked her bewildered at her statement. Sarah leaned back to look at him. She took her hand and placed it on his heart. Chuck looked down at her hand and then back up at her. She had a small smile on her face. Then Sarah whispered, "Your heart can't change, Chuck. Last night when you fell asleep, I had my head on your chest and I heard your heartbeat. I realized then and now, nothing about you has changed. Your heartbeat is still my lullaby. You're still my Chuck."
She caressed his face with the palm of her hand. Sarah drew Chuck's face closer to hers and met his lips with a slow, gentle kiss. Their kiss was so calm and peaceful. She kissed him reassuring him of her love for him. Sarah tasted the saltiness of his tears on his lips. She opened her mouth gradually and allowed Chuck access. He slipped his tongue in steadily and met Sarah's. She pushed his head back, signaling to slide further back on the sofa. She climbed off the floor to straddle his lap.
In between the kisses Sarah said, "I'm here….. with you Chuck. Forever." Chuck smiled up at Sarah as she leaned into him, pressing herself onto Chuck's body. He let his head fall back onto the sofa and looked up at Sarah. She rubbed her nose playfully against his. Then she proceeded to kiss his forehead. Chuck's hands were placed securely under her thigh. He ever so slightly lifted her so that she grazed his crotch. She responded by squeezing her thighs around Chuck's waist and releasing a small moan from the back of her throat.
Sarah then jumped of Chuck, which caused him to pout a little. Sarah laughed a little then offered her hand to him. He took it and got off the couch, following her. She led him down the passage, with her back turned all the way. She never broke eye contact not once. As Chuck looked at her, he did not see playfulness or any bit of her sexy looks she gives when they are about to have sex, but rather he saw a look of gratefulness and an undeniable amount of peace cast on her face.
Sarah was grateful and at peace. Chuck finally opened up to her and that's all she needed from him. She needed him to talk about what happened so then she could take care of him. Because everyone that comes back from the 'farm' always feels like this. She however had no one to take care of her but she never wanted him to go through this alone.
She walked backwards into their bedroom holding Chuck's hand. She closed the door behind Chuck and then they stood next to the bed looking at each other. Sarah took Chuck's hands and placed them on her hips, drawing him closer to her. She placed both her hands around his neck. Sarah then dropped her head onto his chest and they swayed slowly for a few minutes. "Now it's my time to take care of you," Sarah whispered into his chest.
She looked up to him and Chuck nodded responding to Sarah. She dipped her fingers under his form fitting navy blue shirt and pulled it over his head. Sarah placed her warm hands on his bare skin, Chuck sucked in a breath at the feel of her hands on him. She then leaned forward and kissed the spot where his heart resided. Chuck relished in the feel of her lips on his skin. Sarah then proceeded to unbutton his jeans.
The moment between them was so sweet and tender. Neither one spoke, the silence was almost deafening but at the same time it was comforting. She unbuttoned his jeans deftly and slid it down his legs. Chuck stepped out of it. He stood in front of Sarah in just his black boxer briefs. Sarah smiled up at him at then moved to pull her red tank top over her head. As she brought her fingers to unzip her jeans, Chuck stepped forward and placed his cool hands over her nimble fingers.
They stopped for a second and stared at each other. The tiniest smile formed at the edge of Chuck's mouth. He slightly pushed her fingers away and leisurely unzipped her jeans. Once she shimmied and stepped out of the jeans, Chuck looked her over. They both stood in front of each other in just their underwear. Chuck in his black boxer briefs and Sarah in her black and red bra and panty.
Her body was plastered against his as they both enjoyed the feeling of one another. Sarah then placed her palm against Chuck's chest and pushed him against the edge of the bed. With his calves pressed against the side of the bed, Sarah gave one final nudge and Chuck fell. His back bounced off the bed, his muscles flexed as he tried to regain balance. Sarah stepped in between his legs, which were resting over the edge of the bed. As her fingers trailed against his thigh, Chuck used his elbows to steady himself.
Suddenly Chuck brought his entire body onto the bed. He swung his legs around himself. Once he was in the middle of the bed, he perched himself up on his knees. Sarah watched him in confusion as he changed the entire structure of what she was planning to do. She laughed a little and said,
"You're always up to your own tricks, aren't you?" Chuck smiled coyly at her and shrugged his shoulders in innocence. She shook her head and decided to play along with him.
She brought her knee up to the bed and climbed on. She put knee in front of knee until she was finally in the middle of the bed with Chuck. As they kneeled in front of each other, it just so happened that the lighting of the moon and the room shone precisely on them. In that moment Chuck just tilted his head ever so slightly to right, it was then that Sarah caught sight of his neck.
Right at the base of his hair line, there was a scar about 5cm of length. Sarah's breath hitched at the thought of Chuck being hurt. Her eyes opened wide as she pulled Chuck to her.
"Chuck, what happened? You didn't tell me you were injured." Chuck was so confused. His neck was pushed to one side as Sarah examined the scar. It had healed well, but it was still quite noticeable. She wondered how she missed it.
"Ummm….. Sarah you're kynda pulling my neck." Chuck explained to her as she examined him. "It's fine, don't worry. It was not so bad." He tried to placate her as she was freaking out.
"Chuck! Tell me how this happened. Did that Camille Greyson do this to you?" Sarah was raging at the thought of that 'brunette' hurting him.
"Well, not exactly." Sarah squinted at his response. "Well, you know with the training comes, withstanding torture, right?" Sarah nodded. Chuck continued, "So….. well this happened when the training occurred."
Sarah was mortified, "You telling me that they did this to you as part of your training." Chuck nodded. Sarah placed her fingers over the healed scar. She could feel that the cut was quite deep, that meant that there was probably quite a lot of blood.
"It must have hurt?" she asked him concerned. Chuck shrugged his shoulders. He pulled back to look Sarah in the eyes, her hand still resting on the scar. She couldn't look him in the eye; instead she just stared at the scar and whispered under her breath, "You must have been in so much of pain." It was almost as if she was crying and talking. Chuck reached to his neck and took her hand in his. He laced his fingers through hers and said, "Well, it was worth it." He then placed a gentle kiss in the middle of her palm.
"Don't say…" before Sarah could finish her sentence Chuck pulled her to him and kissed her hard. Her head felt light and she felt as if her heart was ascending. They were still kneeling in front of each other and they were still in their underwear. Chuck broke away from the kiss and said, "You know what? You talk too much." Sarah huffed at him then punched him playfully on his chest. The current position they were in may have seemed odd if anyone were looking at them, it was almost as if they were two love struck teenagers fooling around.
A huge smile broke out onto both of their faces, but then Chuck suddenly became silent and let out a deep breath. He looked at Sarah who was now sitting on her heels, and said, "I love you, Mrs. Bartowski." It was so sincere and nearly a whisper that escaped his lips. Sarah cocked her head to the side and a small smile grew on the edge of her lips. She then perched herself upright onto her knees and approached Chuck. She pushed him back so that he was now sitting on his butt and his legs were spread out in front of him. As she approached him, she straddled his lap and then towered over him. Her knees dug deep into the mattress. She draped one arm over his back and used her other free one to caress his face.
Chuck tried not to be distracted with her breasts in his face, so he decided to try and not break eye contact. He looked up at her and she gazed down into his eyes. Sarah used her fingers to brush through his already short hair, which no longer had any curls. She looked deep into his eyes and said in an angelic tone, "And I love you, Mr. Bartowski." Chuck smiled up at her and then her lips came crashing down on his. Chuck pressed his hands against her sides pulling her to him.
The kiss was not rushed but delicate, soft and smooth. She glided her tongue against his lips requesting entrance. He gladly accepted and parted his lips to allow Sarah access. Her tongue swept over his. The coolness of his saliva sent shivers down Sarah's back. She ground her pelvis into his, eliciting a guttural moan from the back of Chuck's throat. Sarah could feel Chuck's erection pressing against her through his boxer briefs.
After a few minutes of passionate kissing Sarah had to let go of his lips for air. Her chest was heaving up and down and so was Chuck's. Her forehead was glued to his. As they both searched for air, their lips parted and at that moment they breathed the same breath. Sarah licked her lips as she ground into his lap. Chuck reached up and brushed Sarah's hair behind her ear. He caught her earlobe in between his index and thumb finger. He massaged it then dropped his hand to her neck where he caressed her. He brought his lips to her neck, there he placed gentle kisses. He could feel her pulse racing at each kiss he left on her skin.
Sarah's head dipped backwards as Chuck kissed her neck, occasionally allowing moans to escape her mouth. He trailed a line of kisses all the way down her neck until her came to her breasts. He bit her through the material of the bra. Sarah sprawled her fingers into the back of Chuck's hair, pulling his head closer to her chest. He kissed and nibbled at her pert breasts, until Sarah reached behind her back. She unclasped her bra and shrugged it off, throwing it to the bedroom floor. Chuck's eyes widened at the sight of Sarah's bare chest. She smiled down at him and pushed him tenderly until his back was on the bed and his feet hung off.
Her breasts were crushed into his pecks as she attacked his lips once more. This time Chuck's fingers found the edge of her panties. He gripped his thumbs into the sides of them and gradually lowered them off her hips. Sarah did the same with his boxer briefs. Soon the both found themselves reveling in the feel of the naked bodies, plastered against one another. Chuck then flipped them over and covered Sarah's body with his muscular body. He rested his arm at the right side of her head for stability. Sarah brought her right hand up and traced the dents that his biceps left on his arm. Her fingers dipped in and out of each ditch that was created not so long ago.
Chuck used his very own fingers to trail a line from Sarah's neck all the way down her body. He approached her heated centre and hovered there for a moment. He relaxed his head under her chin and slowly curved in his fingers. Sarah instinctively opened her mouth for air as she felt her breath being knocked out of her. Her hand gripped Chuck's bicep harder as he drove his fingers into her. "Oh….oh….Chuck." Sarah let slip from her mouth. After several minutes of foreplay Sarah regained her breath and managed to say, "I….. I thought it was… my turn to….. take care of you?"
Chuck looked down at her flushed face and gave her the 'Bartowski eyebrow dance' and said, "Hmm really? What did you have in mind?" Sarah's eyes shot up and she quickly turned them over. Chuck sucked in a quick breath of air as he brushed briefly against her hot, slick centre. Sarah did the same. She squashed her breast against his chest and whispered into his ear, "This," and at the same time she bit his earlobe, whilst her hand drifted down his body to his erection that was throbbing.
She cupped her hand around him and swiftly pumped him. Chuck shut his eyes tightly as Sarah went to work on him. She thoroughly enjoyed the reaction she was eliciting from Chuck. There was a naughty, yet angelic look on her face as her hands went to worked him over. "Oh my God…. Sarah that feels…. so good," Chuck managed to say. Sarah smiled up at him as she knew her ministrations were going pretty good.
She kissed up his chest until she came to rest on his neck. Her hand was still at work on Chuck's erect member. Chuck's toes curled as Sarah refused to stop her nurturing to him. Sarah knew Chuck was reaching maximum point and she did not want it to end in this way. So she slowed her movements and calmed him down by rubbing her feet against his and kissing up his neck to his jaw line.
"Thank God you stopped or else… this was going to end very….. very quickly," he told her through raged breaths. She took her head out from under his chin to look at him, and laughed at his response. "Yeah. Well, I knew that might happen. And I just could not allow that. After all I promised that I was going to take care of you. Now what kind of care giver would I be if this last only a few minutes," she reciprocated to Chuck's response. Chuck looked at her and saw a devilish smile plastered on her face. He knew right there that whatever was going to happen now, was all going to be in her hands.
Sarah lifted herself onto his body and whispered into his ear, "Chuck, I am going to milk out every bit of fun out of this experience." Chuck's eyes flew wide open at Sarah's statement. He was a little scared at swallowed deeply. Sarah's face was still on the side of his head. A sudden rip of laughter coursed through her as her body trembled on top of him. She lifted her head to find Chuck's disposition stuck between completely freaked out and insanely turned on. He gave her his lop sided grin and she instantly pulled her face closer to his and rubbed her nose against his.
"OH….. you are still definitely the same Chuck, I was just testing," she coyly told him. He still could not form a coherent response so all he did was give a small giggle. Her laughter continued as she stretched across the middle of the bed to the side drawer and pulled out a condom. Neither one of them protested. They both knew that what happened last night was a once off thing. That that would be the only time they'd have sex without protection. They weren't trying to get pregnant, but if it happened because of last night's performance, they'd both welcome the experience and everything that came with, in pure joy and happiness.
Sarah ripped open the foil wrapper and carefully placed the glove over Chuck. He sucked in a deep breath as she came in contact with him once again. She snatched a pillow that was resting at the head rest of the bed and placed in under Chuck's head, as he rested himself on the soft mattress in the middle of the bed. She positioned Chuck at her entrance as they were both ready to fully consummate themselves to one another, for about the third time since he had been back.
Chuck's fingers were edged into Sarah's hips as he held on tightly for her to engulf him. In on swift movement Sarah swallowed Chuck. Her lips parted as she tried to catch her breath. Chuck's grip tightened on her hips as he himself tried to catch his breath. They didn't move for a few seconds as they each just took in the moment and adjusted their bodies for the intrusions. Sarah looked down to find Chuck staring right back up at her. They exchanged a small smile. Then Sarah lowered her body down onto Chuck. He loved the feel of her breasts smashed against his chest.
Sarah began to rhythmically move against Chuck. She pushed herself up against him, until he buried himself to the hilt. He met her thrusts in precise timing, each time extracting deep guttural moans from her. Sarah ground her hips deep into Chuck. As she felt him slipping into oblivion, she grabbed his face in the palm of her hand. All the excitement and naughtiness that she wanted to bring into this performance flew out the window. It was replaced with an unhurried, meaningful and gracious approach.
Sarah's fast paced movement was replaced with a slow, deeper one. As they stared into each other's eyes, all sense of pain and anguish dissipated. All fear of the unknown was gone and all that was left was the two of them. Two hearts that were so intertwined and two souls that were utterly meant for each other.
With one deep grind against Chuck, he came gushing into her. Sarah felt it and saw the look on his face. His eyes became a deeper chocolate and his breath became uncontrollably raged. He convulsed against her. As he gradually came down from his high, he slipped a finger along Sarah's clit and she came thrashing on top of him. She gripped onto Chuck's shoulders as she rode out her high. Loud moans escaped her mouth and she finally let all of herself go.
Their sweat soaked bodies smashed against each other as Sarah fell on top of Chuck. He held onto her tightly until her heartbeat regulated. She was breathing heavily and all her energy seemed to have been completely diminished. Chuck grabbed hold of her back with one hand and used the other to lift both of them of the bed. From lying in the middle of the bed sideways, he maneuvered them to laying on the bed in the correct manner. He gently placed Sarah down and then laid himself on his back next to her.
Sarah spooned against him, draping her bare leg over his torso. Chuck brought his arm around her and hugged her to the side of his body. He place a few kisses to the top of her head and Sarah smiled in content.
"Thank you." Chuck blurted out of the blue, after a few minutes of silence. Sarah looked up at him and asked, "For sex?"
He laughed at her, "No…. well yeah….. but also for understanding everything and for caring." Sarah's heart was completely lifted, she felt so lucky to have a man like Chuck, for a husband, she thought to herself. He looked down at her from the corner of his eye to find Sarah's own eyes staring up at him.
"Chuck….. you don't have to thank me. You know that I'm here for you and that you can come to me about anything, right?" she told him. Chuck simply nodded at her and placed a quick kiss to her lips.
Sarah tightened her grip of Chuck with her leg and arm draped across him. She utterly enjoyed having his body so close to hers. After a few more seconds Chuck spoke, "You know, I still don't regret anything that happened to me?" Sarah squinted her eyes at him in confusion. "About, the torture and the physical changes in my body." He made it clear to her.
Sarah's whole disposition changed at the sound of his words. Her body instantly tensed and she uttered out, "Don't say that Chuck! Please don't say that! I wouldn't want anything bad to happen to you. You did not have to do that to get back to me. You know that right?" she looked up straight into his eyes as tears began to form. Chuck cupped her face with his hands and said, "I know that Sarah. But you need to know this; I'll always do whatever to get back to you. I can't imagine my life without you and I'm never gonna have to."
His words cut Sarah to the core. He told her right there that he was willing to go through anything to be with her forever. The truth is she stood on the same ground with him, but hearing it from him meant he would put himself in harm's way to ensure he's with her. Then he said the most gut wrenching words to her, "I'd die for you Sarah." She squeezed her eyes shut as the words hit her like a ton of bricks and a boulder all at once.
She held onto him even tighter and pressed her face into his neck and began to sob. She could barely comprehend anything at that point, let alone speak coherently, but she managed to let out a few, "Chuck…. I knew you were…. gonna say that….. but please…..don't. I….. I can't have …anything happen to you….. let alone….. you giving your life for … mine." Sarah's mind was travelling all over the place. She always held a fear in her heart that Chuck would do something like that and get himself killed. She knew she would never live with herself if that happened, but she also knew where he stood. Truth is she felt the exact way.
Chuck used his fingers to lift Sarah's face from the side of his neck. Her face was soaked in tears. He used the pad of his thumb to wipe them away and tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear with his index. He lifted her chin so that they were on eye level. He tried to placate her, "Hey it's okay. I'm not saying I'm gonna die tomorrow, well at least I hope not." His try at a joke failed hopelessly as Sarah raised her eyebrow at him.
"Look, all I'm saying is that… that's what you're worth Sarah. I'd give my life for yours but not before we've spent our whole lives together. But just know you're worth that. I mean it's not much…. my life that is, but I'd give it up for yours."
Sarah eyed him widely and lifted her finger to rest on his lips, to stop him from talking. She took in a deep breath and said, "Firstly, don't you ever say that your life is not much, because that's not true. You are special Chuck in every way. You make life better, not just for me but for Ellie and Morgan and even Clara. Secondly, have you forgotten who I am?" he looked at her confused.
"I'm Sarah Walker Bartowski, kick-ass spy slash giant-blonde-she-male! So, as far as I'm concerned you're never going to be in any danger and you're never gonna have any reason of putting yourself in danger. So Mr. Charles Irving Bartowski, your perfect ass is safe and sound."
Once Sarah said what she needed to say and all Chuck could do was give her his lop sided grin and laugh a little. He dipped his head and bypassed her lips to catch Sarah's neck in between his lips. Sarah moaned and dug her fingers into the back of Chuck's hair. He pulled Sarah's body to rest partly on his body. The weight was comforting and the warmth that was radiating from her body made Chuck's body go limp.
Sarah sighed in content. Her ear was flat against Chuck's chest and she could hear his heartbeat. She smiled to herself as she felt her heart regulate to his. Chuck's arm was securely placed around her back and his other hand held Sarah's head and caressed the base of her neck.
They stayed like that for a few minutes, in complete, peaceful silence. Chuck then began to hum as he felt Sarah slipping into a serene sleep. He hummed Michael Buble's Crazy Love.
She give me love, love, love, love
She's got a funny sense of humour
When I'm feelin' low down
And when I come to her when the sun goes down
She takes away my troubles
Takes away my grief
Takes away all of my heartache
In the night like a thief
She gives me love, love, love, love
Sarah enjoyed her lullaby. She always knew Chuck could sing, but when he just sang to her, she felt like she could do anything in the world. Sarah tighten her hold on Chuck and kissed his chest, in the exact place where his heart was. As she lay on top of him, she looked up at him. Sarah placed her arms on either side of his head and raised herself to bring her lips in line with his. She gazed into his eyes as her lips hovered over his, barely brushing against it. Sarah raised her hand to trace a fine line against Chuck's neck. Then she lowered her head and met his lips in a slow, soft, sensual kiss.
She was glad she had her Chuck back home with her.
Thank you to all who read and reviewed my story. I'm sorry for the delay but I hope it was worth it. Until next time.