Afraid To Go Out

Written for the prompt : SPN, Bobby, Agoraphobia

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Afraid To Go Out

He'd like to shut the door and tell the whole fucking world to go to Hell but he can't. Even now, he can't go that far because there's one thing that keeps him going, the fact that the Winchester boys need him. It's not much, not much at all, but it's the only thing that keeps him from shutting down completely.

No matter what though he can't leave, he can't set foot outside that door and leave his house and how pathetic is that? If he had any energy left, he'd despise himself for it, but it doesn't work like that – knowing that being stuck inside all the time is ridiculous doesn't actually make it any easier to go out.

The legs, or the chair depending on how you looked at it, was the trigger or maybe it was just the final straw that pushed him from 'rational and functioning' into too fucking afraid to go outside his own front door. He'd had days like it before, days when he hadn't wanted to face people or civilisation, but for the most part they were spread out and if he occasionally gave in to them, well, there were a million reasons why that was reasonable too. But now the days weren't occasional, the urge to give in no longer manageable. Now his life was completely enclosed in four walls and even the thought of going out was enough to shorten his breath and have his grip on the wheels of his chair turn white-knuckled.

Bobby turned the chair away from the door and found himself confronted by Dean Winchester stood patiently, still and quiet. He's tempted to say something snarky about Dean having nothing better to do than stand around watching. But Dean was ready and, quiet as anything, he said, "I'm here when you're ready to take that step." There was no recrimination in his eyes as if he understood.