Fandom: Deltora Quest
Pairing: Lief x Dain
Summary: Dain is becoming a little bit too immersed in his character.
Rating: K+ » rated for boys kissing and very very mild language.
Method acting combines the actor's careful consideration of the character's psychological motives and personal identification with the character, possibly including a reproduction of the character's emotional state. […] Among the concepts and techniques of Method acting aresubstitution, "as if," sense memory,affective or emotional memory, animal work, and archetype work. Strasberg uses the question, "What would motivate me, the actor, to behave in the way the character does?" Strasberg asks the actor to replace the play's circumstances with his/her own, the substitution.
He would emphasise, of course, that it was Dain, not him, who was beginning to fall for Lief.
Why shouldn't he, after all? To Dain, Lief was everything he wasn't; determined, brave, noble... he supposed it made sense for such a weak person to be drawn to someone like that. Nonetheless, the lingering tug that Dain was "feeling" whenever he looked at the other boy was beginning to annoy him. It shouldn't matter, of course, except that He was the one who was supposed to act on it. Honestly, Jasmine had been a much safer bet; girls were easy, the Ol knew, and had always liked Dain. His mild, humble manner which had led the men to relax and ignore him appeared to do the opposite to women, which Dain had found embarrassing and which He had found supremely annoying. He'd never liked human women. They were catty and unpredictable, not to mention irritating. Regardless, Jasmine annoyed him sufficiently less than most he'd encountered, perhaps because she hadn't instantly started crawling around him like a starved alley cat in need of scraps. He could afford to waste a little time on her, if only to win her trust; from experience he knew that if Jasmine was relaxed, the rest of the group would follow suit.
Then something had happened that the Ol had not intended. Dain suddenly wanted to know what Lief thought of all this. Dain would check over his shoulder to see if Lief was looking at him as he talked to Jasmine. Then Dain would simply watch him, immediately averting his eyes if Lief turned to look back. All in all, the interactions resembled that of a lovestruck girl with the object of her affections, which disgusted the Ol a little.
He searched his own memories frantically. Was there an explanation for this? Was there anything he had seen that could begin to rationalise Dain's behaviour? The Ol had always been good at watching and waiting quietly, and had seen lovers tryst and part in his time - observation was key to acting, after all - but he supposed he had never really seen how these things worked between two men.
Perhaps the most infuriating thing about the whole affair was that Lief did not seem to like Dain in return. The Ol wasn't sure how he felt about this; of course, he wanted Lief to like him, as it would make things much less complicated later on... but one of them was going to have to die sooner or later and so, as the Ol certainly did not plan for that one to be him, perhaps he could allow for a little resentment. Still, he could almost feel Dain pining for him, wanting him, needing him, and it was beginning to drive him mad; such pathetic feelings had never been part of his repertoire before.
So he sat down beside Lief one night, after Barda and Jasmine had fallen asleep and the other boy lay awake. Worrying about the quest, the Ol thought, with good reason. But Dain lay his hand on his shoulder and asked. "Are you alright?"
"Just fine," Lief replied with a smile that made Dain's heart skip a beat, though the Ol's didn't move. "You should get some sleep."
"You should, too," Dain urged gently. "I have watched you. You have hardly slept at all."
Lief tilted his head a little at this, understandably perplexed. "It is nothing, Dain; do not worry."
"I do worry." Dain bit his lip a little. "You have to take care of yourself, Lief. Everyone is counting on you."
"I know, Dain," he murmured, eyes averting. "I know."
Suddenly he looked so old; so terribly old for his age. Dain wanted to stroke his hair away from his forehead and tell him it would be okay. The Ol wanted to get this over with; to just reach down and put him out of his misery. Yet he also felt a pang of genuine respect; this boy was doing what no man would dare. He had been truly brave - there was no disputing that any more - and oh, thought Dain, he was so beautiful, he was so, so beautiful. The boy's pale hand gently touched Lief's where it rested on top of the blankets. He was not even aware that only inches of cloth separated him from the item that would bring his end- but the Ol knew, and wished he could draw his hand away. "Lief, you try so hard. I could never have done such a thing."
The other boy sat up slowly with a small nod. He did not move away when Dain sat so close that their shoulders touched and the Ol could see the slow pulse of his jugular. When Dain leaned over and kissed his cheek, hand still gently clasping his, he stayed just as still, even as the Ol repeatedly asked himself Stanislavski questions. Why would Dain do that? Why would I do that? It's stupid for someone to open themselves up like that. Even Dain shouldn't be so foolish... so vulnerable...
Who am I?
What am I?
"Lief- I really-" he turned his face away, and it simply slipped out; "I really like you, Lief."
When Lief looked over at him with wide, perplexed eyes, Dain's heart thumped in his chest where it didn't exist. The Ol privately cursed himself. Dain was meant to seem harmless, not pathetic; but for some reason, he had just looked at him and his logic had failed him for a moment. It was what Dain wanted, he reiterated to himself, not me. Never me.
Then in the still silence, he felt Lief's warm hand tighten on his cold one. When he was next aware of his actions, they were kissing, and for once boy and Ol fused and were indistinguishable in their wants. Strangely, it was Dain who playfully bit down on Lief's lower lip and the Ol who pulled back, shy - he had never known his character was capable of that. He closed his eyes, afraid they might meet Lief's; eye contact was one luxury he could not allow Dain right now. Lief noticed, of course, the observant little bastard (privately, the Ol wondered just how many crucial things Lief had noticed about him) , but he only bumped their noses together shyly. "Dain..."
Dain opened his eyes and gazed up at him, as the Ol took a temporary back seat.
"I'm glad you're here, Dain."
And for a moment, all three of them smiled.
A/N: before anyone says anything, I'm aware of Lief's poor characterization in this and I do apologise; it was meant to be more of a study of the relationship from Dain's perspective, but I am sorry for neglecting Lief. I love him really. ;)