Nostalgia is a funny thing. That which we loved in our youth is engraved in our hearts but the reality of those things we loved never lives up our memory's. So many times I see something as an adult and think 'How could I have been so simple as a child to think this was cool.'
However as I was sojourning through the internet last week I came across some old Bonkers episodes online. I still laughed like I was a thirteen year old kid. I got to say I love the whole Bonkers and Miranda partnership. Any time I see a cop show, live action or animated I compare it to Bonkers. Sad but true.
I spent three days watching old cartoons. That's when I found that we had a spot on Fanfiction for Bonkers but with so little stuff. How can this be! So here's my little contribution to the world of Bonkers Fanfiction.
Bonkers is owned by Disney but they won't release him on DVD. The rat bastards.
I can get Gargoyles. Rescue Rangers and Darkwing Duck but no Bonkers. How unfair is that? -not that those aren't beloved parts of my childhood but still no Bonkers-
The New Cases of Toon Division
Part One - Bobcat Down
The L.A.P.D had some of the best of the boys in blue.
Lest forget they also have some of the best girls in blue.
And if your part of the Hollywood division then you have one bobcat toon in blue.
Police officer Bonkers D Bobcat. Once mainstream funny man was now a cop on the beat. And like all cops man, woman or toon Bonkers had a partner Miranda Wright.
Officer Wright was brewing a fresh pot of coffee for the station. Last night Sargent Grating was celebrating his new transfer or as he put it, 'liberation from that maniac toon nuisance'.
Grating was so happy he took the whole shift, maniac toon included, out for drinks. Everyone was feeling the after effects and with the new Captain coming in today it was not the best first impression to be hungover.
"Hey pass me a cup will you." a rookie cop said Miranda handed him a paper cup.
They took a moment the let the hot caffeinated goodness wash some of last night off their faces. "I can't believe Grating took us all out last night." Miranda said still not believing the hateful jerk of a boss could do something nice.
"I know. I still don't believe it and I have pictures to prove it." the rookie pulled out his cell phone and shows Miranda a few of last night's highlights.
The pic was of Grating so smashed and happy that he pulled Bonkers into a bear hug and kissed him goodbye. That image did more to pick Miranda up then a pot of coffee and a cold shower. She giggled at the thought of Grating seeing that picture as she was sure any memoirs he had of last night were destroyed by the alcohol.
The rookie flipped through a few more pics on his phone. "Well the Grating finally got free from the bobcat and as I hear it your next, Detective Wright."
Miranda slammed the coffee pot back down into the machine with force. If that didn't startle the new guy the look in her eye's did. "Bonkers has nothing to do with me trying to advance my career." she stormed off before the poor guy could even start to mutter an apology.
It was true that Miranda had passed the detective's examine and hadn't told Bonkers about it. Her promotion would break up their partnership but it wasn't that she wanted to be rid of him like Grating. Sure Miranda was doing this for her career but it's not like she was trying to be selfish, just accidentally being selfish.
It had been a few weeks after she took the examine and she hadn't told Bonkers. When ever she tried the words just seemed to fail her. He had already lost one partner in Lucky.
Specking of officer Bobcat, he then made in entrances. Normally he was like a toon typhoon bursting through the door, or the wall and sometime the ceiling. Today however he had to slowly drag himself him. Bonkers was looking as haggard as everyone else from last night. Bonkers eyes were dizzying pools of swirls and his bright orange color was off.
"Rough night partner?" Miranda asked but she winced on the word partner as it tasted bitter in her mouth.
"I'm never having another triple strong double chocolate flip-flop float ever again."
Candy and sugar were the closest thing to alcohol a toon could get.
Bonkers took a cup and walked over to the water cooler. Instead of filling the cup Bonkers put his head under the spout and turn it on. He sighed happily as ice cold water rush over him and the water cooler gargled.
Miranda stiffed a giggle as her partner drained the water cooler on his head making a huge mess on the floor. "Feeling up to go over our case load?" she asked as she picked up a file.
"Lay it on me." Bonkers said before opening his mouth to drink some of the cold spring water pouring down on him.
"Over the last few weeks there have been several tanker trucks stolen. What the tankers where hauling range from household bleach to industrial strength hydrochloric acid."
"It's not insurance fraud?"
Bonkers question took Miranda by surprise. Theft of this type was usually an old insurances scam. 'Bonkers thought of that quickly. He's getting some good cop intuition.'
"No, all the trucks were owned by different companies and all under different insurances policy's. Whoever did this wanted what was in those tankers."
Bonkers pulled his head out from under the cooler and shook his head dry like a dog. Miranda had to shield herself with the file in her hands to avoid the spray. The water must of worked because Bonkers was looking close to about 100% of his normal self. Normal being a subjective thing at best when talking about Bonkers D Bobcat.
"Come on Miranda. Let's hit the road and see if we can't find some clues."
Bonkers and Miranda left the station. After they were gone one hungover cop saw what the cold water did for Bonkers and thought 'what the hell?'
He crouched down into a puddle of water then put his head under the water cool and turned it on. "Ohhhhhhh! the Bobcat was right for once. This is the best way to clear you head." he smiled as the cold fresh water washed over his pounding head.
"What's going on in here?" a commanding female voice ask.
Standing in the doorway looking at this mess was the new Captain. A black woman of middle age and dressed in light gray skirt and suit. The disbelief in her eyes under her horn rimed glasses turned to anger. "I asked you a question officer!"
The rookie tried to stand up but slipped and knocked over the water cooler. Making an even bigger mess.
The new Captain sighed and pulled cigarette case out of her jacket pocket. She looked disappointed to find it full of candy suckers. Still she unwrapped one and let the sweetness of it do it's best to soother her in place of nicotine. "They told me I only have to worry about the Bobcat."
-out on the L.A highway-
Miranda was driving a new Police Dodge Charger patrol car. Bonkers wasn't allowed to drive, ever. So he was on the computer trying to get a lead.
"So if what would you do with a dozen tanker trucks? I mean you couldn't just park them in your driveway. Unless you live at an airport."
"Bonkers I don't think our thief is living at LAX."
"I know but you'd need somewhere to put them. So a warehouse or factory like that."
"Yes but there are thousands of those around L.A. We can't check them all."
Bonkers typed into the computer. "Okay so let's remove all the warehouses and such that are owned by businesses and look at one's privately owned." there were a few hundred red dots on the screen still.
"Still way too many Bonkers."
"Then let's see which ones have been bought with in the last months or so..." There were now a few dozen red dots. "...and which one of these have had the power turned back on a few weeks ago."
There where now only about ten dots. Bonkers was checking the history of each of the property's. Miranda was still somewhat shocked by Bonkers when he worked seriously like this. Well maybe seriously was the wrong word but he was more focused.
"Look Miranda this one by the docks was bought just after the first trunks were stolen. It was bought by a Mr. John Smith who left no forwarding address or phone number but did pay upfront with cash."
"Let's check it out. Good work partner."
"Yeah..." Bonkers got strangely silent. "...maybe I should try the detective examine too."
Miranda pulled the car over and put it in park.
Bonkers didn't look at her but just hung his head out the window like a sad puppy.
"Look Bonkers I meant to tell that..."
"Your leaving." there was no anger in his voice, just hurt.
"No! I'm not becoming a detective to get away from you. It's something I want for myself. Can you understand that?"
"I do Miranda and I'd be happy for you but why didn't you tell me?"
"I wanted to but I could never find the words. I knew it upset you."
"What if I came into work one day and just like that you were gone. It be like when the studio just kicked me out the door when I thought it was just going to be another day. I don't think I could take that kind of rejection any more."
Miranda hugged Bonkers. "That's not how it is and that's not how it's going to be. Your my partner but even if that changes I'll always be your friend."
Bonkers forgave her and returned the hug.
It was odd but not unpleasant hugging Bonkers. The hidden bonus of having a cute, cuddly and fuzzy partner.
"Come on Miranda let's wrap this case up."
The warehouse in question was an old place in an industrial park by the docks. It the past it was used for holding chemicals before being shipped over seas. It looked run down by barely usable. They made a few slow drive byes but saw nothing that give them just causes to search the place.
"Bonkers we can't go in there unless we have some kind of hard evidence."
Bonkers stuck his head out the window like a hunting dog, his eyes zooming out like binoculars. "Miranda I think I see one of the stolen trunks hidden out back."
Miranda pulled out the list of the trunk's make and plates. Sure enough it was one of the missing tanker trucks. "Let's search the place and call for back up if we find anything."
However just as Bonkers and Miranda were about to start searching the place someone inside made them.
He was tall and dressed in a long black duster jacket and a hood. Black gloves covered his hands and his face was hidden under a smiling white ceramic mask. In fact you couldn't tell for sure if it was a man or a woman or even if he was a human or toon.
"So their here already. Damn I was so close." his mask had a voice changer and it lent his words an eerie and otherworldly quality. He turned away from the window and walked into the foreman's office. The whole room was done up like a chemistry lab.
The masked man stopped only to grab a notebook and turn up the heat on a few of the burners before knocking them over. Soon this whole place was going to be in flames.
He walked out of the office just as smoke was starting to smolder and started to cross the catwalk on the second floor.
"Police! Freeze! Hold it right there! Don't even think about moving, not even a inch!" Bonkers said as he bounced up the stairs on the other side of the catwalk.
Miranda was right behind Bonkers with her gun drawn. "Put your hands behind your head!"
"Why did I do something officer?" the Mask man asked.
Bonkers pointed an accusing finger."Yeah other then being a creeping phantom of the opera knockoff and generally shady character your in possession of several stolen trunks. How do you explain that Mr smarty mask?"
"Easy I stole the trunks and I was just destroying evidences when I saw you two outside. And for the record my name isn't smarty mask, call me Judgment." the masked man answered.
"At lest he's a helpful criminal." Bonkers said.
Miranda wasn't fooled by his act. This Judgment guy was way to calm for someone who just give up like that. "What was your plan then?"
"I was working on a little chemistry experiment. I'm keeping the notes as I was this close to getting old man Doom's formula down." Judgment the pulled a lever on a near by control box and the tops several large vats that were filled of some yellow and green chemical opened.
"What is that stuff?" Miranda asked having to cover her mouth and nose with her free hand to block the smell.
"It's Dip but as is it's only 80% refined but soon I'll reproduces Judge Doom's Dip. The stuff that can kill toons."
"Impossible you can't kill a toon. Right Bonkers?"
Bonkers didn't say anything. In fact he looked scarred like she had never seen. No odd cartoon gag shacking knees or huge drops of sweat. Just fear all over his silly bobcat face. "Dip can kill a toon. I heard the story about Judge Doom but we toons don't talk about it. It's to frightening."
Miranda aimed her gun at Judgment who was slowly backing away. Even on a straight shot he was to far away for her to hit. "Why! Why would you want to kill any toon?"
"Cartoons are like the dream's of children both are ephemeral and worthless in the real world. I just wish to wipe the slate clean of such uselessness. Look at your so called partner, he's not going to face true death for you."
"Bonkers if you want to go back to the car and call for backup..."
Miranda didn't get a chance to finish that thought as Bonkers brushed past her. He was now on the catwalk hanging over huge vats of Dip, the stuff that every toon learned to fear. The fear that was on Bonkers face was gone in it's place was pride, his pride as a officer of the law. "Miranda cut him off if he tires to get away. I'm going to show him that a toon cop isn't any less of cop."
Judgment laughed. "A toon who thinks he's a hard boiled cop. There no stunt doubles or director to yell cut here."
"This badge of mine isn't a prop. You can get a good look at it as I slap the cuffs on you." Bonkers said brandishing a pair of handcuffs.
Bonkers was as determined as Miranda had ever seen him. She moved to head back down the and cut off any of exits. "You got this one Partner?"
"Yeah he's mine for sure."
Bonkers took off running down the catwalk toward Judgment. The masked man turned to run but not before throwing a steal drum down the narrow catwalk. "It's on like Donkey Kong!" Judgment laughed out loud as he threw more drums at Bonkers. For a toon dogging random objects at high speeds was like walking in the park. None of the drums even got close to Bonkers.
Seeing that he couldn't stop the bobcat Judgment kicked open the latch on a stack of empty oil drums and sent them tumbling down toward Miranda on the ground floor. Not being a toon she didn't have as much luck dodging them. She was bowled over and knocked into a drainage ditch that ran through the warehouse.
Using that distraction Judgment slid down a ladder to get away. He hit the ground running and was making a brake for the door.
A shadow passed over Judgment's head and he looked up to see Bonkers flying at him like a dive bomber. The crazy toon and thrown himself off the second floor. Cartoons could do something crazy stuff like that. Bonkers crashed into him head on knocking them both to the floor.
"Your under arrest!" Bonkers was on him like glue as they fought to their feet.
"Not if you want your partner to be alright!"
Judgment reached into his coat and pulled on an radio trigger and clicked it. Several small explosions ruptured the seals on the Dip vats. The toxic mix was now rushing down the floor and into the drainage ditch where Miranda was trapped.
"The hydrochloric acid mixed in that dip alone will be enough to melt her pretty skin right off her. So what are going to do arrest me or save her?"
As if this psycho and Miranda's life were any were near an even value. But before Bonkers left he pulled a mallet out of his back pocket and smashed Judgment right in his stupid ginning mask. Bonkers was already off and running to save Miranda before the creep hit the floor.
Judgment pulled himself up as half his mask split off and feel to the ground. "That damn toon! I'll kill him, all kill every toon in Hollywood." The voice changer was scrambled and was switching on and off. He picked up the busted half of his mask and made a run for it laughing all the while. Without his voice changer you could hear his real laugh, a deep full bodied and joyful laugh that didn't have the slightest bit of sanity to it.
"Miranda are you okay?" Bonkers asked not hesitating for a second to jump down into the ditch with her. She was pinned under several drums and couldn't move. Bonkers started pulling the top drums off her as Miranda struggled to move the lower ones pinning her.
"Bonkers get out of here that Dip stuff could kill you!"
"Well it's not going to do you any favors so help me push and we can both get out of here."
The yellow and green sludge was oozing down into the ditch just as they kick the last drum off Miranda. Running down the ditch they saw a ladder on the far back end. "Your up first Bonkers and don't argue with me!"
Bonkers didn't and Miranda helped push him up. When he was clear he reach down and helped pull Miranda up just as the Dips splashed the soles of her shows melting their tread.
"We made it." Miranda sighed with relief.
"But our suspect got away."
"Well get that guy next time so..."
Miranda was cut off by the sound of the second floor office now totally on fire falling free. It took the catwalks with it and those in turn smashed the Dip vats. Now instead of a flood it was a tidal wave of Dip that over filled the drainage ditch like it was nothing. A four foot wave splashed over the lip of the ditch and was about to wash over Bonkers and Miranda.
'just a few feet more and we would have been safe.' was all Miranda could think.
That was until her world started spinning as Bonkers pushed her out of the way. She came to a rolling stop far enough away to be safe and with just enough time to see Bonkers get splashed in Dip.
She ran to him a heartbeat latter and pulled him from the Dip puddle headless of the chemicals burning her bare hands. He wasn't moving or making any sound but Miranda didn't care, she had to get him out of there. She made her way outside with Bonkers in her arms and ran to the squad car.
Miranda set Bonkers down and took a good look at him. His back looked like a half melted candle. His tail was half gone as were his antenna like ears. As she pulled her hands off him she felt how wet they were.
Her palms were covered in orange pant. The same orange color of Bonkers fur. Little splashes of orange were dipping off Bonkers. The sight of it made Miranda sick to her stomach and had to fight back the urge to vomit. She felt numb looking at her orange panted palms.
Why had she said that?
Blood was red and this was clearly orange pant but it felt like blood to her. Then she realized why it felt like blood.
Bonkers was dieing and this was his blood.
Miranda grabbed the radio from the car. "This is car thirteen! We have a code Four! Officer down! Send back up!"
"This is dispatch what's your situation car thirteen."
"Officer Bobcat is down and needs help!"
"... … ... The toon cop? Can he actually get hurt?"
"SEND HELP! HE'S DIEING!"
"Copy... … ... Where the hell do you send a toon for help?" that last part wasn't meant to be sent over the air but even if it wasn't Miranda was thinking the same thought.
Was there any place or anything that could help Bonkers?
Was it to late?
Was Bonkers already dead?
Miranda Wright a strong woman just tucked her head into her knees and waited as she watch what little life Bonkers had bleed out of him in bright colored toon blood. It took her numb troubled mind some time to notice that she was crying and had been for some time but by then she didn't care who saw her.
Her partner was dieing and she was helpless to stop it.
Well I feel like I just murdered my childhood but I do better at angst then funny.
As a kid the first movie I remember my parents taking me to see was "Who Framed Roger Rabbit" I won't lie as a young kid Judge Doom scared the hell out me. When I got older I fell in love with the old Bonkers cartoons.
Even now as an adult I love Japaneses Anime but I still think American Cartoons stand up well. It might just be nostalgia but if Disney put Bonkers out on DVD I would buy that up in a heartbeat.
Anyway as this is such a small fandome I don't know if anyone will ever find this fic or even like it. I'm more then a little off from the original source still if you a Bonkers fan tell me what you think and review.