Santana stepped up to the front door first while Brittany nervously trailed behind her. The brunette realized the uneasiness in Brittany when she stopped and turned around to wait for her to catch up. She didn't want the blonde to be nervous or scared about this. Santana didn't really know how to change Brittany's thoughts around and make them more positive. She tried reassuring her multiple times on the walk back home but not much had changed since she told the blonde about her idea this morning. Brittany was scared, and that was what made her nervous. She didn't want ruin anything, assuming she hadn't already with what happened at the hospital; she needed Santana's mom to like her.
"Hey," Santana said, tilting her head lower to catch the blonde's eyes that were stuck on the ground beneath her, "Britt, don't worry. It's going to be fine."
Brittany forced a smile as she looked up at Santana but the brunette could tell it wasn't honest. She sighed deeply before taking a few steps to meet the blonde halfway. Santana reached out and took Brittany's hand in hers, holding it in one and placing her other hand on top to squeeze it.
"I love you Brittany. My mom will too. She may not be as open with her feelings as your mom but she will be okay with this, I promise you," Santana said firmly, trying to reassure the confidence in the blonde.
"I'm just…" Brittany started, taking a deep breath, "I really want her to like me San," she finished, lifting her head up to show her worried eyes.
Santana exhaled into a sweet smile and reached up to tuck a strand of hair behind Brittany's ear before letting her hands softly graze the side of her jaw. Their eyes met again and for that moment, Brittany thought she might be able to do it. There was something about Santana's kind brown orbs that was giving Brittany a newfound strength to do this and she inhaled deeply to let that feeling travel throughout her body.
"Trust me B, she'll love you," Santana said with a smile, "Okay look, it's only 4 and my mom doesn't usually get back until 4:30 or 5. We have time okay? Don't worry."
With that, Brittany let out a little sigh of relief knowing she had some time to calm her nerves and possibly let Santana convince her that it really was going to be okay. Santana unlocked the front door, one of her hands still holding Brittany's, and walked into the dark house. It was much different to Brittany's that had lighter wallpaper and more lights. Santana's house, much like her bedroom, had dark shades of blue for the walls and white outlines around the doors and windows. Brittany hadn't actually been over many times at all because Santana always insisted that they went to the blonde's.
Santana led Brittany to the stairs and she took the first step only to feel her hand losing contact with the blonde's. When they were no longer touching, the brunette turned around to see what was wrong. Brittany stood at the bottom of the stairs looking up at the wall at the top of the stairs. The brunette furrowed her eyebrow in confusion as she watched Brittany's eyes dart back and forth at something behind Santana. The brunette turned around to see what she was looking at but there was just a wall which made everything that much more confusing.
"B?" Santana asked nervously.
Brittany opened her mouth to speak but nothing came out. Realizing she was at a loss of words, she pressed her lips tightly together and lowered her eyes so they met with Santana's. She couldn't tell how worried she was coming off as until Santana's eyes widened with fear.
"I…" she began, "Sorry, it's just...the last time I was here I…" Brittany dropped her head and shook it.
Santana starting thinking back and it showed with her eyes moving around upwards, until it clicked and she remembered. But before she could say anything to comfort the blonde, Brittany was already talking again.
"Santana," Brittany said panicking as she looked up into the brunette's eyes, "Santana can we just do this another time I'm not ready I don't think I can do this what if she hates me what if I already screwed things up," she continued to ramble on, "And the last time I was here I was yelling at you and we fought and I just, I treated you so badly and I still haven't forgiven myself Santana I can't do this today."
The brunette watched as Brittany still continued to mumble on about things until she stepped down to meet the blonde and pressed her lips against hers, silencing her simultaneously. The sudden kiss caught Brittany off guard but much like all other times, she immediately relaxed into it shortly after. Santana's hands came up to each side of the blonde's faced and cupped it for the last seconds of the kiss. When they parted, Santana watched Brittany's eyes flutter open and she couldn't help the smile she felt coming.
"Brittany S. Pierce," Santana stated, the corners of her lips curving upward by the second, "I love you. I love all the little things about you from the way you crinkle your nose when you don't understand something," she said, mimicking the crinkle of the nose that Brittany does, "…to that adorable giggle that you do when something's funny but you're not sure if you should laugh or not."
Saying that earns a little smile from the blonde as she continues to listen to Santana, her eyes never leaving the brunette's.
"If you really don't think you can do this then its okay, we'll do it another time," Santana paused, "But I know that you can do this. I know because you're braver than I am and you always have been. I know that because you were strong for me when I was a mess. You stayed strong for both of us. Things got a little messy towards the end but it's nothing we couldn't handle right? I'm here," Santana said bringing her hand back to rest on her chest before continuing, "and you're here," she said, using her other hand to take Brittany's and place it on top of the one on her chest, "And we're better than we've ever been."
Brittany exhaled into a smile and dropped her head bashfully. Taking a few quick breaths, the blonde lifted her head up again to meet Santana's eyes to watch her finish what she had to say.
"So…I'll ask you again...Brittany, will you please meet my mom?"
The smile on the blonde's face was lost for a moment and Santana could tell she was thinking hard about her answer so she waited patiently. Brittany blinked slowly and took a deep breath, preparing to give her answer.
Santana waited a moment before smiling. She took Brittany's hand that was at her chest and brought it to her lips, kissing it gently before turning around and walking up the stairs, taking the blonde with her.
"Crap that was the door wasn't it?" Brittany said anxiously from the bed.
They had managed to get rid of most of it but Brittany still had that little ounce of nervousness inside her and it was probably never going to go away. It was good that she wasn't completely confident with it but Santana assured her many times that there really was nothing to worry about.
Santana was messing around in her closet, trying to find a different shirt to wear.
"Seems right, it's 4:45," she said over her shoulder as she stopped at one grey t-shirt with a little pocket.
"It looks good on you," Brittany said from the bed and watched as Santana turned around with a quirked eyebrow, "It fits nicely, and I like that shirt."
She smiled sweetly before taking it off the hanger and placing it on the chair near her. Her hands moved to grab the hem of her current shirt and lifted it up and over her head. Brittany couldn't help but stare at her smooth tan colored skin and her toned back muscles. She bit her lip to stop the sudden arousal she was feeling and shifted in her position. Santana turned around to reveal her front with just a bra and Brittany looked away bashfully, her cheeks turning pink. Seeing this as she grabbed her shirt on the chair, Santana giggled to herself.
"Really B?" she said as she stuck her hands through the new shirt before pulling it over her head and adjusting it so it fit properly, "See something you like?"
Brittany shook her head in embarrassment as she laughed to herself, "Shut up, you're not helping."
When she lifted her head up, Santana was inches away from her, leaning down so her hands were on either side of the blonde. Their faces were impossibly close and Brittany could feel Santana's breath dance across her lips before she closed the gap between them. Brittany felt Santana smile against the kiss only making her lips curve up as well.
"Okay come on, let's go," Santana said, taking the blonde's hand as they parted.
Brittany let out a quiet whine before jumping off the bed and following Santana out the door and down the stairs to meet her mom. She was nervous the whole minute it took to get downstairs and her heart was pounding uncontrollably. Her grip on Santana's hand tightened as they entered the kitchen to find Ms. Lopez's back as she rearranged a few things in the refrigerator.
"Hey sweetie, I'm sorry I won't be home for dinner, they need me to check out a house about an hour or so out of town so I'll be home late. Do you think you can handle it? Or do you want me to stay?" Ms. Lopez said not having looked up from what she was doing in the fridge.
Santana smiled because of the last bit of what her mother said about asking if she would want her to stay. Ms. Lopez never really gave Santana a choice before and even though she wasn't going to ask her mother to stay, it was nice to know that she had that opportunity. She cleared her throat and watched as her mother stood upright and turned around.
"I know you've talked to her before but uh, Mom, this is Brittany," Santana said, stepping aside to reveal all of Brittany and not just half of her.
Ms. Lopez was surprised at first but eventually settled into a very kind smile which brought down Brittany's nerves slightly. Ms. Lopez wiped her hands on a nearby cloth before making her way over to the two girls standing in the hallway. Santana's mother extended her hand to the blonde for a handshake to which Brittany stared at for a brief moment before taking it. The grip was firm but gentle enough to calm Brittany down a little more.
"Hi Brittany," Ms. Lopez said, "I've heard…a lot about you," she said glancing over to Santana.
Santana watched as Brittany smiled nervously and she smiled to herself at how adorable the blonde looked right now.
"Come, let's sit down its more comfortable in the living room," Ms. Lopez said, leading the way.
Brittany looked over to Santana and exhaled an exaggerated breath of relief to which the brunette only laughed at.
"Stop laughing this isn't funny," Brittany muttered under her breath as she turned around to follow Ms. Lopez into the living room.
Seeing as Ms. Lopez took her normal seat in the chair, Brittany decided to sit down on the couch followed by Santana who sat very close by. An awkward silence filled the air before Santana decided to say something.
"Um…okay Mom," she began, "Brittany is my girlfriend."
Brittany's eyes widened before she dropped her head to hide them. She picked at the edge of the couch material, scared to see whatever look was on Ms. Lopez face.
"Girlfriend?" Ms. Lopez said and with the way her voice came out a little shaky, both girls could tell she was trying to understand the whole situation.
Santana knew that it was more about just getting used to the whole idea but Brittany's mind was still racing with thoughts that perhaps Ms. Lopez didn't approve. She was wrong, but that didn't stop her from thinking it.
Ms. Lopez didn't look upset or angry or anything negative, she just stayed quiet occasionally nodding and Santana who was watching her, could tell that she was trying to wrap her head around the whole idea. She didn't expect her mother to react in any way like Brittany's so this wasn't surprising. Brittany on the other hand kept her head down and was now fiddling rapidly with her fingers.
"Mamá por favor dice algo," Santana began in Spanish knowing that it was the only way Brittany wouldn't understand what she was saying, "Ella está un poco nerviosa."
Ms. Lopez was taken aback by the sudden use of their native language, not to mention they haven't spoken to each other in Spanish since, well, a long time ago.
"Porque la última vez que ustedes estaban juntos fue en el hospital," Santana said, glancing back at Brittany to find her still playing with her hands, "Ella solamente quiere dar una buena impresión, ella tiene miedo de que no le gusta su."
Ms. Lopez's eyes shifted to Brittany and she tilted her head.
"Brittany," she began, causing the blonde to look up slowly, "Don't be nervous, please."
The blonde turned to look at Santana as if she needed permission to believe it. Santana nodded and Brittany turned back to face Ms. Lopez.
"It's a little bit late for that," she said with a nervous laugh to which Ms. Lopez only chuckled to herself.
"So, how long have you been in Lima?"
"Uh, ever since I can remember. My parents are from here," she replied, slowly easing into the conversation but still holding on to that nervous feeling in her stomach.
"Oh that's nice," Ms. Lopez responded before asking another question, "Tell me about yourself; what do you like to do?"
Brittany swallowed hardly and said the first thing she always answered these questions with, "Dance," she paused, "I..I, like to dance."
"She's amazing at it too," Santana added, taking Brittany's hand in her own and smiling warmly at the blonde.
Brittany met Santana's eyes and she felt little more of that anxiety crumble away. She let out a breath she hadn't known she'd been holding and smiled softly to Santana, squeezing her hand. Ms. Lopez shifted her eyes to their entangled hands and took a deep breath, feeling it a little too much to look at right now. But then she looked up at Santana to find her with a smile she had never seen before. And as she watched her daughter look at Brittany, her eyes blinking lustfully and her lips curved upwards, Ms. Lopez realized that Santana was happy. That Brittany made her daughter happy and that was all that really mattered. If them being together meant Santana could wear that smile every single day, Ms. Lopez was more than okay with it.
"Is it something you want to do in the future?" she asked, not wanting to have interrupted their moment but felt that the air in the room was getting slightly uncomfortable.
Brittany broke away with more confidence then she had coming in. She smiled softly to Ms. Lopez and nodded.
"I hope so," she began, "Dancing is my passion, I wouldn't know what to do with myself if I didn't have it."
"That's like Santana and singing," Ms. Lopez added, "Well, at least it used to be right mija?"
Santana wasn't smiling as much but she simply nodded, "Yeah, I lost it for a while, but I'll get it back someday."
"Santana, por favor traenos algunas vasos de agua," her mother said to Santana and Brittany watched the brunette nod and get up from her seat, not really understanding anything that was going on.
"Por favor, no asustarla a ella, Mamá."
"Goodness, you think so low of me Santana," she said with a smile before glancing over to look at Brittany who was more than confused.
When Santana left the room, Ms. Lopez cleared her throat as she had something quiet important to say. Brittany's nerves were coming back without Santana sitting next to her and she was beginning to panic again, her hands finding each other and fiddling about crazily.
"Brittany," she began, "I know you must have heard a lot about me. Some not so nice things I can only assume. I can only hope that how you saw me before hasn't stuck and you'll give me a chance to redeem myself."
Brittany was shocked at the words. Santana's mother was…asking for a second chance? It wasn't making much sense but the blonde didn't want to sit there and make Ms. Lopez feel like she made all the mistakes.
"Oh wow, Ms. Lopez, I really didn't-"
"I know, I know. You're just going to say that it's none of your business but it is. At least it is now. I screwed up, countless times, and it's a long shot but I'm still hoping that she'll forgive me fully one day for all the pain I've cause her. After her father left, I lost it completely and I neglected her and said terrible things that I will regret for the rest of my life." she began.
Meanwhile, Santana had two glasses in her hands as she walked down the hallway. She overhead the word father and immediately stopped before she was visible to the two others in the other room. She stood close to the doorway as she listened to the conversation Brittany and her mother were having.
"…She looks at you like you're the best thing in this world, like you're the only thing that matters. The way she looks at you and with the way she's talked about you, I know that you're going to be around for long time. So I want you to do something for me," she proposed.
Brittany quirked her eyebrow and leaned in a little closer, gesturing that she continue.
"I want you to promise me that you'll make sure she's happy. She deserves to be happy; after everything she's been through. And I know I can't do that for her anymore, but you can. Will you do that for me?"
Brittany inhaled deeply, taking in the intensity of what Ms. Lopez just told her. But she knew the answer. She's known the answer to that question ever since she realized that she and Santana were best friends. She even knew it before she fell in love with her.
"Ms. Lopez," Brittany began, and Santana who was still standing behind the wall, took a deep breath to hear the blonde's response, "Santana deserves the world and more. If it wasn't so hard for me to get that for her, she'd have it all by now because it's what she deserves. I love your daughter. I love her more than I've ever loved anything else in this world. I love her more than I love myself. And I will work hard every day to make sure that she's the happiest she's ever been. And I'll keep trying to make her even happier the next day. And the only way I would ever leave her, is if that would make her happy. If I had to leave her in order for her to be the best and the happiest person she can be, then I would do it. It would destroy me, but I'd rather destroy myself than ever see her show a single sign of unhappiness. So you don't have to worry about Santana not being happy because no matter what, I will spend my life making sure that she is."
"Well then, so much for my convincing speech I was going to give," Ms. Lopez smiled, causing Brittany to do so as well after being so serious with her words, "I'm so happy Santana has found you."
Brittany shook her head and smiled, "I'm the lucky one here; she's the best thing that's happened to me."
Santana didn't notice she was crying until one of her tears dropped into the glass of water in her hand. She looked down at it and shut her eyes tightly before rushing back to the kitchen.
"Well I have to get going now, I don't know where Santana went off to with the glasses of water but you could go find her right? I have to get ready," Ms. Lopez said standing up.
Brittany stood up with Santana's mother and adjusted her outfit. Ms. Lopez made her way over to the blonde and hugged her, thinking that it was more than okay to do so with the conversation they just shared. Brittany placed her hands on the older woman's back to reciprocate the hug.
"It was very nice meeting you Brittany," she said with a smile, "Properly…"
Brittany giggled to herself before telling Ms. Lopez the same. After watching the older woman climb the stairs, the blonde began to wonder where Santana had gone. She ducked through the doorway and into the hallway. She heard noises from the kitchen and went that direction to find Santana bent over the sink. It took a moment before she realized that the brunette was crying and rushed over to her side.
"Hey hey what happened?" she said worriedly.
Santana just shook her head, trying to tell Brittany not to be worried but that only made the blonde feel even more scared.
"Santana?" she began before the brunette interrupted.
"No Brittany, don't worry," she swallowed her tears, "I'm fine, I just uh…" she trailed off.
Brittany's eyes were so blue and so worried that when Santana turned around to meet them, she almost immediately got lost in them. The blonde's hands reached up to brush away the tears from Santana's face and the brunette closed her eyes at the touch. When she opened them again, those beautiful blue orbs were still watching her and she could swear that they got even bluer as the days went by. She took a deep breath, feeling herself shudder a little as a result from crying, but there were no more tears. When she calmed down, she was left standing in front of the blonde with her guard completely down. There was nothing there to stop her from falling completely and irrevocably more in love with Brittany and she was glad. She was glad that nothing stood between them, that it was finally just Santana and Brittany. Not Santana and Brittany but just friends or Santana and Brittany but they don't know they're in love or Santana and Brittany but Santana's leaving. None of those were options to choose from anymore and that made it so much easier to sleep at night. It made it so much easier to just be with each other.
The brunette's lips curved into a soft smile, one that Brittany came to realize was only one Santana used before she was about to say something that was going to take the blonde's breath away again.
"I just love you so much Brittany. I…I want to…" she began, never failing their locked gaze, "I think I want to spend the rest of my life with you."
"Oh well that's the difference between you and I, Santana," Brittany said, stepping closer after wrapping her arms around Santana's waist, "You think you do. But I have never been more sure in my life that you're the girl I want to spend my last breaths with," she finished in almost a whisper as their faces inched closer towards each other.
On that note, Brittany leaned in and kissed Santana. It was a passionate kiss which was different than to the ones they've recently shared that were little pecks of reassurance. The blonde pressed forcefully against Santana's lips, causing the brunette to lean back against the sink. Her arms naturally found their way around Brittany's neck and she tangled her hands in the beautiful blonde hair.
Santana heard the front door shut and opened her eyes, still locked in a kiss with Brittany. She pulled away from the blonde, earning a groan from the girl in front of her.
"And?" Brittany asked curiously.
Santana looked back into Brittany eyes and started to smile. She brushed past the blonde, grabbing her hand in the process and dragged her to the stairs. They walked up together and Santana opened the bedroom door but waited and gestured for Brittany to go in first. After the blonde walked in, Santana stood in her doorway for a moment, watching as Brittany took her seat on the bed and her eyes reconnecting with the brunette's. Santana sighed happily and leaned against the door frame, blissfully staring at the love her life sitting in front of her.
"What?" Brittany said with a smile, her cheeks blushing just a little bit.
"I'm just so happy," she said, "…with you and with…everything."
And she wasn't lying. There was not one part of what she had said, not one word, that she didn't mean. Santana was happy. She was happy with the person she was today, she was happy with the people in her life and she was happy where she was. She had everything she never even thought she wanted. Her dreams were coming true, ones she didn't even know she had. A year ago, she was mess. A sad, miserable broken excuse for a person and it looked like there was no way out; that that was the way things were going to be for the rest of her life. And if she hadn't made the best decision of her life to let Brittany in, she would still be that same lifeless person she was a year ago. But she did make the right choice because Brittany is the best thing that happened to her. If it weren't for her, she'd still be living with those walls built up all around her. With shields that isolated her from the rest of the world, from reality, from living.
Every day with Brittany was one she would never regret. Even the most hurtful of days, she'd do it all over again because it's how she got here today. It's why she's standing in front of the girl she wants to spend the rest of her life with, her soul mate. Every day with Brittany was a step in the right direction. Every day with her would break down a little piece of those walls. Some days were slower and they were only being chipped away. But other days, much like this one, and a whole fucking side would be knocked over, never to be put up again. She was almost free. Almost free of the stupid insecurities she made for herself and the protective shields she built around her. She could see the day when they'd be completely gone and she'd finally get to spread her wings and fly; to be best she's ever been. Santana was ready to let go of her past, to free herself from those nightmares. She wanted to look ahead, she wanted to plan for the future. She wanted to decide where she was going to take Brittany for their first date. She wanted to decide where they'd go after graduation; she thought New York would be nice. She wanted to plan the moment she got down on one knee and proposed to Brittany. She wanted to make all the little decisions and have all the little arguments. She wanted to plan for better days and she could already see them coming.
And with that thought, Santana broke down the last of it. The last wall that was ever holding her back from being the person she was always meant to be. And while Brittany had done most of the knocking down of the shields, this one was all Santana. This is the one she was waiting to destroy ever since it was put up. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. She was free from it. From her past, from the hurt, from all the suffering. She let it all go and when she opened her eyes again, she saw her. Brittany was the first person she saw when she opened her eyes again and it was perfect. It was perfect because this was the beginning of it all. This was where her life truly began. And this was the moment their life together, Brittany and Santana, was about to start.
She pushed herself off the wall and walked into the room, closing the door behind her.
It was the first night she spent wrapped up in someone else's arms, completely exposed to every feeling and every touch. It felt so incredibly right. That she was made to fit only for Brittany's body. And when they lay in bed together, the only source of light being the moon peeking through the curtains, Santana thought only one thing. She went through it all to get here. She went through it all so that she could feel this happy in the end, like it was all worth it. Maybe the pain was there for so long because Brittany was meant to come and heal her. Maybe Brittany found her in the hallway because they were meant to fall in love with each other. Maybe life handed them a lot of a crap to prepare them for the harder things life would throw at them in the future. And maybe she was given a second chance at life because she was meant to spend it with Brittany. All she knew was that she had everything she could have ever wanted and more. And as she cuddled up closer to Brittany, nuzzling her head into the blonde's neck, she knew that this was what she wanted all her nights to be like; wrapping up in the safety and comfort of Brittany's loving embrace. And now that Santana had it all, she knew that there was no way she was ever going to let it go.
A/N: It's been amazing you guys. I love you all so much. I know I've tortured you quite a lot but I hope it was all worth it in the end. I never planned on having this story end badly, but I did have a bunch of terrible things lined up like Santana getting into the hospital and then her leaving later on. But that's all in the past and they're happier than ever as you can read. Anyways, thank you so much for reading this fic. I hope that you guys enjoyed reading it as much as did writing it. You were my inspiration the whole time and I can only hope that my next piece will bring you guys back to me. Again, you're all amazing and I love you. Also, feel free to pm me if you want to talk about anything, possible ideas for new fics, anything at all. I love making new friends and I love tlaking to people. So whatever, if that is something you want to do, go for it.
Otherwise, yes. This is the end. I've enjoyed it so much. It's been a long journey together and as sad as I am to end it, I think it was time that Brittany and Santana got the happy ending they deserved.
Take care xx
Love you all 3
-Monika (ps thats my name lol)