Hello darlings! First off, thank you to anyone who enjoyed or left a review for Dear Nosey Parker for motivating me to start a sequel up. I hope you have as much fun reading as I do writing. Anyway, moving on.

Disclaimer: Rockstar owns canon. Lucky bleeders.

Chapter 1

15th September

Dear Nosey Parker,

Diaries completed: 1
Alcohol consumed by self: Approx half a glass(I don't know how anyone can drink vodka for pleasure)
Alcohol consumed by mother: Apprx 52 glasses(drunk enough to believe she can sing)

1am: Just when you thought you were rid of me, I became bored at a party and decided to allow you to invade my privacy again. It was this or being pinned down by my cousins and given a makeover. You win.

Miss me? I bet you did, you nosey little thing, you. I'd love to say I'd missed you but, to be frank, I have no proof that you exist, and I haven't got to the stage of insanity where I miss imaginary friends (although if Mum doesn't stop singing "Sex Bomb" downstairs, I might be soon).

Anyway, I best be off so that I can get a half-decent sleep.

3pm: Have just realised that the nosey parker reading this may not be the same nosey parker reading the last diary, in which case I probably ought to introduce myself.

In a nutshell, I am the mistress of the universe. I have an IQ over 9000 and a loving hareem who live to serve me. My face is the most beautiful thing to grace the earth and my smile can cure indigestion.

Moving on to the truth, my name is Gloria Joanne Br- Jackson and I currently at the ripe old age of thirteen. My birthday is the 2nd November if anyone wants to get me anything(hintety hint hint).

16th September

Dear NP,

Things I need to buy for class:
Art: Paintbrushes.
English: 1 notebook and 1 bottle of scotch.
Biology: 1 small, cute animal, and 1 machete.
Chemistry: 3 crucifixes.
Misc: School Uniform

20th September

Dear NP,

Hugs from Melody: Lots.
Time spent unpacking trunk: 10 minutes.
Time spent unpacking Melody's trunk: 55 minutes(Why the devil does she need all those teddies?).

7.30am: Back at Bullworth Academy. Dear Lord, it's not natural to be awake at this hour.

10am: Had a great catch up with Melody in English. Apparently Pedro and his mother

11am: Pedro just strode in wearing Aquaberry. This wouldn't be so worrying if he wasn't speaking with a faux English accent.

Sent an email out to everyone to see if they want to go out on the weekend. Should be fun if we can all make it down.

22nd September

Dear NP,

8am: Karen says she's going to see Edna's baby today.

10am: Pedro has started passing notes in purple prose. Dear God, what did they do to him?

12pm: No sign of Karen. Melody says she's in the sick bay and babbling deleriously. Something about Beezlbub. Dr. Watts isn't in today either.

In other news, Mr. Galloway's bottle of tea has went missing.

3pm: Still no Karen.

Went to see the baby. It turns out that Angie and Christy were right to knit extra sleeves.