Author's Note: I honestly never thought I'd ever be writing a fanfic for iCarly, but…yeah, I actually really like this show. I just think it's cute and genuinely pretty funny at times. The most recent line that made me laugh out loud was actually from iPity the Nevel in that scene where Idiot Farmgirl Carly is like, "Do you wanna kiss me?" and Vampire Freddie replies, "If I do…I might bite your neck. Y'know…murderously." XD Good stuff.

Anyway, I was inspired to write this after watching iOMG. (Great episode. ;D Well, aside from the cliffhanger.) This fic really has nothing to do with that episode, though. It would definitely take place before it.

Hope you enjoy. :)

Disclaimer: iCarly © Dan Schneider

Freddie Benson was the biggest dork on the planet.

Sam knew that from the moment she met him. She knew that Fredward had been—and always would be—the dorkiest, most loser tech-freak in the world, whose ridiculously overprotective mom would always be there to iron his underpants or force-feed him steamed Brussels sprouts or wipe a smudge off his cheek with her own spit-covered fingers.

Yes, it was definitely no secret that Freddie Benson was a major, major dork. Everything about him reeked of complete and utter dorkiness.

He was just so…nauseating.

Sam couldn't help but grimace at the thought of that annoying, nerdy little nub. She was sitting at a table that was set up in the iCarly studio, scooping up mashed potatoes out of a bowl with her bare hand. It was lumpy and cold from sitting out so long, yet Sam still couldn't resist herself from licking off a glob of potato deliciousness, reveling in the taste of the butter that was mixed in there.

"Mmmm," the blonde moaned contently. She reached out to grab another handful of mashed potatoes, only to have the back of her hand abruptly smacked by a metal spoon. "Ow!" Sam screamed in pain, recoiling her hand back to her chest. She shot a look at the girl sitting next to her. "Hey, what gives?"

"Stop eating the mashed potatoes!" Carly commanded sternly, shaking the spoon at Sam. "There won't be enough to fill up all these Easter eggs!"

Sam rolled her eyes and, without a word, reached into the bowl to scoop out another glob of mashed potatoes with her hand. She reached for a bright green plastic egg with her other hand, popping it open and stuffing the glob of mashed potatoes inside of it. When she was done getting the last bits of it off her hand, she closed the cap of the egg and tossed it into the basket that lay at their feet.

"Happy?" Sam asked in annoyance.

"I will be after we finish filling up the rest of these," Carly said, gesturing to the package of plastic eggs that was still in front of them. "Now get stuffing, missy!"

"All right, all right," Sam groaned as she reached for another egg, picking up a pink one this time. "But as soon as we're done with this, Mama's passing out on your couch for a much needed nap." She looked over to see Carly using her index finger to neatly slide a small amount of mashed potatoes off the spoon and into a blue egg.

"Fine," Carly said as she reached for the cap of the egg, "but we're starting iCarly rehearsal as soon as Freddie gets here."

"Great," Sam said in a heavily sarcastic tone. "Can't wait 'til Frednerd gets here."

Carly smiled, but she didn't say anything. The two best friends continued filling the eggs in silence, which was eventually broken by the high-pitched sound of Carly's cell phone ringing. The brunette set down the spoon and picked up her phone, looking at the screen for a moment, before she tapped a button on it with her thumb and put the phone to her ear.

"Hey Spencer," Carly greeted into the phone. She immediately cringed and held the phone away from her ear as the faint sound of a screeching 'CAR-LAAAAAYYYY!' could be heard. Sam snorted in amusement at the way Carly glanced at her in desperation. She wasn't even able to get a word in edgewise when she put the phone back to her ear. "Spence—you—" She paused. "…What? How did you manage to do that?" Another pause. "…All right, all right, just calm down. I'll be there in five minutes."

"What happened?" Sam asked curiously, watching as Carly pressed a button on her Pear phone and stood up from her chair.

"Spencer got into a fight with an old lady down at the mini mart over a box of Jell-O," Carly informed her, to which Sam promptly furrowed her eyebrows in blatant confusion.

"Over a box of Jell-O?" she repeated in disbelief, then after a pause, she added, "What flavor?"

"I don't know!" Carly shouted in her 'are-you-kidding-me?' voice. She hastily grabbed her black denim coat that was slung behind her chair and slipped it on. "Anyway, I gotta get down there before someone calls the cops on him or something. I shouldn't be too long." She stuffed her phone into her coat pocket and began making her way towards the door. "Don't eat all the mashed potatoes while I'm gone!"

"Yeah, yeah," Sam said with a dismissive flick of her wrist as Carly opened the door and rushed out, slamming it shut behind her.

Sam let out a heavy, aggravated sigh. She looked at the half-empty bowl of mashed potatoes, then down at the basket as she dropped a yellow plastic egg into it. She didn't like doing stuff by herself, especially when it was stuff she didn't feel like doing in the first place. At least when Carly was with her, she had someone to talk to, and therefore wouldn't get as bored so easily. She dug her fingers into the mushy mashed potatoes once again, before slowly pulling her hand out, holding yet another ball of mush. She stared at the lumpy mess in her hand and scoffed to herself.

'This goop kinda looks like Freddork,' she thought. 'It's shaped like his stupid head.'

She immediately clasped her fingers over it, squishing it down so that the shape would purposely change. She opened her fingers slowly and gaped at it again for a moment.

'What the—I can still see his dumb face in it!'

Furiously, she closed her hand over the ball of food and scraped it off into an opened egg. She quickly closed the lid and threw it below her, listening to the clack it made as it hit the pile of plastic eggs. She propped her elbow up on the table, and it wasn't until she rested her palm against her cheek that she realized it was burning in embarrassment. Her eyes widened instantly as she jerked her hand away from her face. The realization only made her blush even more.

'Aaahhh…stop thinking about that dork!' her conscience scolded her. 'He's a know-it-all little momma's boy who's way too into computers and…


holy chiz…does that dork seriously know how to get Mama's heart pumping.'

Sam closed her eyes and lowered her head to the table, hard enough that it still made a thunk once her forehead hit against the smooth surface. Her stomach fluttered with unwanted butterflies as her cheeks continued to grow even hotter from the thoughts of Freddie that were quickly clouding her mind. She clenched her hands into tight fists, groaning against the table in agony. She hated thinking about Freddie that way.

You know…that way.

It took her a really long time to admit to herself that she had feelings for him. Of course, she knew the exact moment when her feelings towards him started to change from complete hatred to something much…different. It happened when they shared their first kiss nearly two years ago. Ever since that moment, Sam started thinking about Freddie a lot differently, even noticing things about him that she kind of…liked.

She knew then that she was beginning to develop a crush on the dork.

For a while, she tried really hard to convince herself that it was nothing more than that: a crush. As time went on, however, her feelings for him started to grow. She tried to tell herself that these strong feelings for him stemmed from nothing but that awkward, seemingly meaningless kiss. There was a part of her that truly believed that she'd be able to get over him one day and eventually start liking some other guy.

Unfortunately for her, that never happened. If anything, her stupid little crush grew worse over time, until finally, she simply couldn't deny her feelings to herself anymore.

She was in love with Freddie Benson.

It was her deepest, darkest secret that she swore to herself she'd never reveal to anyone. Not even Carly. She just couldn't risk Freddie potentially finding out and inevitably getting rejected by him.

She just couldn't…


Sam immediately flinched in surprise, her head snapping up from the table. She blinked groggily, turning her head to see the object of her affections himself standing at the doorway.

"Benson," she said as nonchalantly as she could.

Freddie walked into the studio, closing the door behind him. He set his laptop down on the little cart with all his random tech stuff before he started walking over to her. Sam felt herself tense as he made his way towards her, but she made sure to keep her usual irritated scowl plastered on her face.

"Carly texted me saying that she had to go save Spencer from some old lady down at the mini mart or something?" Freddie said in a questioning tone.

"Yep," Sam replied with a lazy stretch of her arms, extending them over the table. "Apparently he got into a fight with her over a box of Jell-O."

"Jell-O?" Freddie echoed, raising an eyebrow. "What flavor?"

Sam smacked her lips together tightly, just to stop herself from accidentally smiling over the fact that she had asked the exact same thing earlier.

"Don't know," she answered with a shrug. "Anyways, Carly said she shouldn't be too long. In the meantime, I gotta finish stuffing these Easter eggs with mashed potatoes."

"Ah, right, right, for the next iCarly bit," Freddie said with a nod. "Well, I gotta set up some new stuff on my camera before we start rehearsal anyway. I got this brand new lens that can do all these really cool angles like this fish-eye look which is—"

"Ooh, wow, that's soooo interesting!" Sam interrupted. The plastic bag crinkled loudly as she reached into it and pulled out another neon colored egg. "Please tell me more, Fredward," she added sarcastically as she popped the egg open.

Freddie ignored her as he walked over to the cart and opened up his laptop. The two of them both fell silent after that, each preoccupied with their own tasks. The room was filled with nothing but the sounds of Freddie typing away on his laptop and the occasional popping and clacking of the Easter eggs from Sam. As she dropped another egg into the basket and absently reached for another one, Sam's eyes slowly began wandering from the table to look over at Freddie. Once her eyes locked on him, she found herself unable to look away.

He had a look of deep focus on his face as he typed on his laptop with one hand, his other carefully adjusting the camera lens on the large recording camera that rested on the cart. Sam bit her lower lip, hoping he wouldn't look up anytime soon and catch her staring at him. She continued staring intently despite her fear, however, studying the subtle features on his face: the arch of his eyebrows, the perfect shape of his nose, his delicious chocolate brown eyes…

After a while, she forced herself to stop looking at his face, but instead, her gaze somehow wandered to his arms.

'Since when did he get such huge biceps?'

Sam dragged her teeth over her bottom lip, exhaling a short, soft sigh through her mouth. Her lips remained parted slightly, her eyes still transfixed on Freddie's muscular arms. She reached up to put her cool hand on the back of her neck.

Was it getting grossly hot in here, or was it just her?

"'Kay," Freddie said out of nowhere, and immediately Sam withdrew her hand from her neck and slammed it down into the bowl of mashed potatoes. It was so abrupt that some mashed potatoes went flying out of the bowl and splattered onto the table. Sam's heart froze as she shot a look in Freddie's direction. He blinked in confusion, and after an awkward moment of silence passed, Sam finally spoke up.

"I, uh…saw a bug in the mashed potatoes," she lied. She slowly brought her hand up, wiggling her fingers so that the lumpy goop shook off and fell back into the bowl. "It's dead now."

Freddie pursed his lips, nodding his head slowly.

"Okay then," he said, then after a pause, he decided to change the subject. "Anyway, I'm all finished setting up my camera stuff. Do you want some help with the rest of those eggs?"

Sam's eyes widened slightly.

"Uh," she said, glancing back down at the mess she made on the table. She looked back up at Freddie, who simply stood there, waiting for her response. "Sure, whatever, Benson."

Freddie walked over to her, pulling out the chair that Carly was sitting in earlier. Sam tried her best to ignore his overwhelming presence as she grabbed another egg and popped it open, scraping the random bits of mashed potatoes off her hand and into the egg. She watched from the corner of her eye as Freddie picked up the spoon that Carly was using and scooped up some mashed potatoes from the bowl. Sam closed the lid on her egg and dropped it into the basket.


"Hey, uh," Freddie said, causing Sam to jump slightly. She turned her head to look at him, but she didn't say anything, prompting Freddie to continue. "You got some mashed potatoes in your hair."

Sam looked down at her curly mass of blonde hair that rested on each of her shoulders. Her eyes moved from her left shoulder to her right, unable to spot the food.

"Where?" she asked.

"Here, I'll just…" Freddie started, his voice trailing off from there. He placed the spoon down and turned towards her. Sam found herself suddenly holding her breath as Freddie reached out and gently stroked her hair with his index finger and thumb. He carefully slid the small piece of mashed potatoes out of her hair and pulled his hand away. "Got it."

Sam blinked dumbly, finding herself unable to speak. She just stared at Freddie, realizing at that moment just how close they were sitting from each other now.

"Thanks," she whispered, her voice so small that she was hardly able to recognize it as her own.

"You're welcome," Freddie whispered back in that deep voice of his.

Sam's eyes sparked with a sudden rush of emotions from the way Freddie was looking at her, his face just inches away from hers. She let out a sharp breath through her parted lips, her heart now pounding wildly in her chest. She stared into his eyes, until slowly, her gaze drifted down towards his soft, pink lips…

It was there that her eyes remained locked, and Freddie seemed to notice this right away, because all of a sudden, he leaned forward to close the small gap between them. The next thing she knew, his lips were pressing against hers in a hard kiss. Sam let out a stifled noise of unexpected pleasure as she immediately gave in to her ultimate desire and closed her eyes, moving her lips eagerly against his. Their mouths molded against one another's, creating an intense heat between them unlike anything Sam had ever felt before.

Sam's hands suddenly flew up, completely of their own accord, and latched desperately onto Freddie's shoulders. She dug her fingertips into the smooth cloth of his shirt, the kiss deepening as a result. The jolts of tingling electricity that ran through her body were so overwhelming for her that she almost couldn't take it. She was so wrapped up in the moment that she was just scarcely remembering to breathe. Reality was quickly slipping away from her, and she was enjoying every second of it.

"Sam," she heard Freddie mumble against her lips. She could feel his hands sliding up her back, his fingers gently tangling into her long, curly locks of hair.

"Mmm?" Sam grunted in response, refusing to break the kiss anytime soon as she gripped his shoulders even harder.

"Sam," he repeated, a bit louder this time.

Sam ignored him, though, instead focusing on the way his soft lips meshed so perfectly with hers.


She just didn't want this moment to end…


The blonde jolted awake, jerking her head up as she swatted frantically at the hand that was on her arm. Her pulse was racing like crazy, and it took her a few seconds to realize where she was and what was going on. She looked up to see Freddie staring at her with a deeply puzzled look on his face.

"When did you get here?" Sam asked, her words coming out in an unintentionally defensive tone.

The confused look didn't leave Freddie's face as he dropped his hand back to his side.

"Just now," he answered, and a brief awkward silence followed, before Freddie slowly reached up and pointed to a corner of his face. "Uh, you got a little something…"

Sam immediately smashed the back of her hand against her cheek, rubbing at whatever it was that was on her face.

"No, it's…a little further… Here, lemme just…"

Just as Freddie's hand was about to start coming towards her face, Sam's own hand flew out and slapped it away.

"Don't touch me," she spat, secretly terrified of the way her heart just jumped from the impending contact.

Freddie held up both of his hands, taking a step away from her. He didn't say another word as he turned his back to her and walked over to the cart with all the wires and random tech stuff. For a moment, Sam just sat there, looking at him and being struck with a weird feeling of déjà vu.

"By the way, Puckett…"

Sam watched as a playful smirk slowly spread across Freddie's lips, which only caused her heart to start beating even faster.

"What were you dreaming about just now?"

Her heart completely froze then.



"Uh…" she said warily, her eyes so wide that they were practically popping out of her head. "What do you mean?"

"Well, you were moaning in your sleep when I walked in here," Freddie said. The teasing smirk returned to his face as he arched an eyebrow at her in a way that made her feel even more nervous. "Were you dreaming about ham?"

"Yes," Sam said instinctively. "Yes, I was dreaming about ham. You know how much Mama loves the ham… Speaking of which, I'm gonna go get me some ham right now." She bolted out of the chair and walked right past Freddie, leaving the room so fast that she didn't even allow him a chance to say anything else.

"One of these days, Benson…" she muttered to herself, putting a hand to her burning cheek as she made her way downstairs. "One of these days…I'll tell you how I really feel…"

In the meantime, she would simply drown her feelings in ham.