The Importance of Being Celibate
A Pregnancy Parody by Chibi Horsewoman
Note: As stated under the title, this is parody. There is some truth in all fiction, but for the most part I wrote this for fun and laughs. If humour, pregnancy, or Winx Club fan fictions in general bother you, then please go find something else to amuse yourselves with. This story is parody, it requires a sense of humour and imagination, and this is your only warning.
Dedication: My reviewers, my beta reader and anyone who can take a joke.
Disclaimer: The cast and characters of Winx Club belong to their respective owners. I am writing this story for entertainment purposes only and am not making money off of it.
Chapter Three: Musa's Confession
After Bloom's less-than-surprising departure, the remaining members of the Winx Club continued to discuss their options now that they were officially knocked up. Would it be better to run off like Bloom had, leaving Sky in the lurch yet again, him not knowing that the heir to the thrones of Domino and Eraklyon was forming in Bloom's body? Or should they stay there and tell their boyfriends they were going to be daddies?
"Come on girls!" Tecna argued, as Stella continued to campaign for ditching the babies' daddies and running off to Gardenia with Bloom. "We've faced down the Trix, Lord Darkar, The Trix, Valtor, Mandragora, The Trix, and the Wizards of the Black Circle." The teal eyed techno-fairy paused to take a drink of ginger tea to calm her rolling stomach, and resumed her speech.
"Statistically we'll probably face the Trix again along with whatever villain they align themselves with by the time Roxy starts here. I think we can manage to tell our boyfriends that we are such freaks of nature we all managed to get pregnant on the same night at the same time."
"I agree with Tecna." Musa stated suddenly, "Besides, if these guys can't take accidental pregnancies, then maybe we shouldn't be with them."
"If you're so confident, Musa, then why don't you call Riven and tell him the great news?" Stella taunted from her place on the floor."I can't wait to see how that turns out."
Flora picked up a pillow from Musa's bed and threw it at the blonde girl, something she never would have done if she hadn't been pregnant, nailing Stella square in the face. "Stella, shut up. You don't have to be a bitch about everything."
The eyes of every other girl nearly shot out of their heads. As bad as she was now, no one wanted to contemplate arguing with a very hormonal Flora, let alone how she'd be eight months down the road.
Musa smiled radiantly at Flora, grateful for her friend's quick defense. "I guess I'll call Riven now and tell him to meet me somewhere."
"Why don't we all call our boyfriends?" Layla asked curiously.
Stella yawned, looked warily at Flora and then commented, "Those of you who are going to tell your significant others what happened last month, be my guest. I don't want Brandon to know I'm going to be the size of a ship in six months."
"Stella, statistically speaking, with our figures we will be showing at around five months." Tecna interrupted.
"Whatever," the blonde replied waving her hand at her friend. "I still have to contact the royal seamstress back on Solaria. After she can find a way to hide my belly, then I'll tell Brandon."
The other four Winx girls did a collective face palm. Finally it was decided that Musa, Tecna and Layla would tell Riven, Timmy and Nabu respectively, while Flora was on the fence. The new pregnancy hormones had turned her from a calm, sweet, loving person to a raging bitch who shot throw pillows and other room décor at her friends when she wasn't trying to eat everything. However it hadn't made her less timid when it came to confessing to her boyfriend of two years that they were going to be a family. Flora had to make a game plan on how to break the new.; Hopefully her friends would be able to give her some blueprints after they were done.
"So, how do we decide who goes first?" Tecna asked after the decision had been reached.
"Maybe a friendly game of rock, paper, scissors?" Layla suggested hopefully.
"While you two figure that out, I'm going to call Riven before I lose my nerve." Musa told her friends as she pulled out her phone and hit the button for Riven's phone, it rang twice before he picked up.
"Hey, Muse, what's up?" Riven asked casually, not knowing that on the other end of the line, his girlfriend's stomach was pitching around like a rollercoaster.
"Not much Riven, but I need to talk to you about something important. Can you meet me at the main park downtown?"
Riven hesitated for a moment, he'd had plans already with some of the guys, but Musa sounded almost desperate so he figured he could cancel. "Sure, I'll see you in twenty minutes."
Musa hung up the phone, feeling only slightly relieved, "Well, wish me luck." She called to her friends as she exited the room.
Twenty minutes and not one second later Musa and Riven were sitting on a secluded park bench watching children run around on the playground. Riven kept stealing glances at his girlfriend who was not acting her usual controlled self. She also had a slight green tinge to her face.
"Say Riven," Musa began cautiously. "Do you ever think of doing that?" She pointed at a father pushing his daughter on one of the infant swings.
"No, because I don't think my bum would fit in those swings." Riven replied, completely missing the point of the question. "Why?"
Musa swallowed hard, fighting down the plain macaroni Flora had forced her to eat before she left Alfea. " Because, well, oh how do I put this. Say that we had sex and…."
"Musa, we have had sex, quite a few times and nothing has happened yet."
"That's what you think." Musa retorted smartly. "The girls and I all took tests today and they all came back positive."
"And Bloom hightailed it for Gardenia again?" Riven asked, again missing the point, but now it was intentional. He wanted to make sure he'd heard right.
"Yes, but that's beside the point. Riven, I'm pregnant and you're going to be a dad."
Riven was silent, this worried Musa who began to wonder if maybe she should have followed Bloom's lead and just run off somewhere. She'd heard Gardenia was nice this time of year. Hearing nothing but silence from her boyfriend for five minutes, Musa chanced a look at Riven only to see that he had a ridiculous smile plastered on his face.
"I'm going to be a daddy!" Riven finally exclaimed, grabbing a hold of Musa and swinging her around a few times.
Musa was dumbstruck; she had imagined that maybe Riven would give her a quick hug at best. At worst, throw a fit, accuse her of cheating on him and leave. In all of her wildest dreams she'd never imagined he'd start dancing around the most popular park in Magix, going up to random strangers and announcing that he was going to be a dad. Now Musa could only hope that her dad would take the news as well as Riven.
AN: Yes okay, so maybe in some people's minds Riven was more than a little OOC. However in my head canon and in the head canon of some others people do imagine that Riven would be thrilled that he was going to be a dad. Hence why he's grinning and acting like an idiot. He never had a family of his own and now he can have one.
Thanks for waiting for me to update, I hope you enjoyed this chapter.