Disclaimer: I do not own Doctor Who or else we wouldnt have to wait one more week

A/N: LOL this is a prompt from my friend: Sewage System. Wrote it real quick and she beta-ed it for me x3 hope you all like it


The Doctor failed to resist his smile and as River began to snuggle into the nape of his neck, he pressed the randomization button and made sure that River long forgot those green men.

The air was filled with an array of color that was being emitted from the green goop that laid disturbed under their feet. River couldn't help but glare at her beloved Doctor as they trudged in the disgusting waste that laid in the city sewer as quietly as they could.

"Sweetie," she hissed quietly, "do you mind explaining one more time why in the name of sanity we are crawling around in a sewer? It isn't really what I'd call a romantic date."

"Shh," the Doctor stood still for a moment to listen around the surroundings. They hadn't been caught. "Because, honey," he strained the endearment, "I saw a few people with whom I am not on very good terms with in their perspective."

River gave an exasperated sigh. "Doctor, how many times must I tell you that no matter what culture or era we're in, they do not like you insulting their ancestors, especially if they are particularly sacred."

"All I said was that their father had a bit of a short temper and his people would have liked him much better if he hadn't had so many heads cut off," the Doctor explained defensively.

"That still constitutes as an insult, dear."

"Oh they were just being overly sensitive, now shh, we're almost to the TARDIS," the Doctor commanded as he continued to lead the way.

The Doctor enjoyed the silence and began to lead more contently. Unfortunately for him, that enjoyable silence did not last long.

"Dear, I'm pretty sure we were supposed to make a right turn at the last rat hole," River told him.

"River, I know exactly where we're going," he insisted, "I have a psychic link with the old girl, she's leading us right to her."

River rolled her eyes, "Doctor, no matter how strong your psychic link with the TARDIS is, we were supposed to make a right at the rat hole. You are going the wrong way."

"Well what do you suggest we do? Stop and ask for directions?"

"In fact, that is brilliant, we don't we ask those blokes over there," she pointed out a group of green and orange men glaring angrily at the Doctor and couldn't help but smirk, "oh this shall be interesting."


The Doctor entered the TARDIS with a pout as River walked in with the green men fawning over her. They all shared a laugh as the men escorted River into the Doctor's ship. He went straight to the console and glared as River flirted with the men who previously wanted to murder him.

"Alright, thanks boys and don't forget, you don't murder challenged aliens."

"We won't Miss Song, and again we're sorry. We had no idea he had a disability," one of them explained.

"It's alright, no one really knows."

"You all be safe now, if you need anything Miss Song, here's our numbers and Doctor, remember to try and watch your words."

The Doctor gave a small spiteful nod and the men all left. River smiled and joined him at the console. He kept his sight straight ahead as he began to pilot the TARDIS.

"Oh, Doctor, don't be so jealous," River ran her hands over his shoulders and down to his waist, "Amy and Rory are still out," she wrapped her arms around him and put her mouth near his ear, "so why don't we go on a quick trip and get that date you are always bragging about."