"This is horrible. Of all the nights for a rainstorm, mother nature has the worst timing." Quinn was pacing back and forth in her robe and metallic prom shoes, every now and again stopping in front of the window to sigh.
"Are you talking about your period now or are you still whining about the apocalypse out there?" Santana said quietly, lying back on Quinn's bed. "Cool it, Fabray. It's not like McKinley planned to have prom on the football field."
She was upset about the rain too, but she had much more pressing thoughts on her mind now. Quinn noticed Santana was acting crabbier than usual, even for Santana, but she dodged all of her questions, so she had no choice but to ignore it. She knew who she would talk to, and wanted to talk to, unfortunately that one person was probably the reason she was so anxious and uptight in the first place. She felt sorry for her, moping on her bed in her towel and fresh make-up, but then she heard the thunder again, and her attention swayed.
"I can't believe this." she muttered, flopping down into her seat in front of the vanity mirror and reapplying her lip gloss.
Santana pulled herself up and glared into the back of Quinn's curly blonde head, hoping to burn a hole.
"I swear on everything, Quinn, if you say one more word about the rain-"
"Sorry I'm late." the moment she heard her voice, Santana's words were sucked back in and she had to repress the happiness that rose in her chest from Quinn's wandering eyes through the reflection in her mirror.
Brittany was soaked from head to toe, carrying her prom dress in a plastic garment bag.
"You were supposed to be here a while ago, Brit." Santana said, pushing herself off the bed and tightening the pink towel around her body. Her heart started beating faster just saying her name.
"What happened to you?" Quinn asked raising an eyebrow at Brittany's body drenched in rain water.
"I didn't know which house was yours, I was outside for 15 minutes after my mom dropped me off trying to find the right one."
"What are you talking about? We've known each other since we were kids, Brittany. I've hosted about a thousand sleepovers here."
"Your house looks really similar to the one across the street in the rain."
Quinn and Santana exchanged knowing looks before she stood up from her seat walked toward her.
"Well your dripping all over the rug, my mom's gonna burn me at the stake if I don't clean this up . Let me get you a towel."
She went out of the room leaving Santana and Brittany alone in silence.
Santana touched Brittany's hair and smiled sympathetically.
"You could've just called Brittany. You know, or rung the doorbell. Your hair and make-up are ruined. Sit down, we have to fix this."
Brittany smiled back, the awkwardness between them killing her. Santana sat on the bed digging inside her open make-up bag, waiting for Brittany to join her. Her hands shook after every lipstick bottle and mascara tube touched her fingers. She only wanted to touch her again, her hair wasn't enough.
Brittany laid her unsullied dress on the bed and started stripping out of her wet clothes and into her matching underwear, making Santana's heart speed up as she tried to avoid staring. When Brittany sat in front of her, Indian style, their knees touched and Santana couldn't help but smile, especially looking at Brittany's face, sweet and damp.
"This nights a total disaster, huh?" Brittany said quietly, when Santana began wiping at her smudged eye shadow. Santana nodded; her complaining was so much more tolerable than Quinn's.
"Poor Artie, I don't think he can roll himself and hold an umbrella at the same time." Brittany muttered, a genuine look of worry crossing her face. His name just made Santana grow hot in the face, but she only shrugged.
"He's got it covered, Brit. If he could manage sex, he can figure that out just fine."
She started wiping down her cheeks with another dry cloth, her eyes straying down to her damp chest bound by her strapless black bra. She looked back up and Brittany was smiling at her, caught in the act, but Santana looked away trying to steady her beating heart.
She really wanted to return Brittany's smile, but she couldn't. Everything in her just wanted to be the reason that she smiled all the time, but she knew there was someone else in her life that held that place and it made her heart wrench. Just hearing his name made her upset, she didn't know if she could go through with prom now, after all. Ever since Brittany rejected her, she threw herself into Sam, but it wasn't the same. Time with anyone else never felt the same as it had with Brittany.
When Santana looked away from her, Brittany felt like someone was tugging on her heart. She knew it was her fault that Santana couldn't stand to look at her anymore, but she was stuck. She loved them both too much to lose one by hurting the other. But even keeping them both felt like losing one.
Slowly, she placed her hand on Santana's knee in front of her to catch her attention again. Santana's leg shook, but she immediately got back to work cleaning off the make-up. She couldn't help but notice how lovely Brittany was underneath it all, like she was drawing her in.
Brittany was trying to think of something to say to make Santana smile, racking her brain for the right words. When she finally settled on a few, she couldn't hesitate, even though Santana's napkin had moved onto her lips.
"Santana, you look really beautiful. Sam is going to be-"
"Brittany." Santana dropped her hand from Brittany's face and looked into her lap, holding back the tears she felt coming. "I don't want to talk about Sam, okay."
Brittany's mouth turned down at her failed plan.
"But that's your boyfriend. We always talk about them."
Santana sighed. She just didn't get it.
"Sam is hot, and he is a good kisser- I mean, obviously, look at his lips, but…I just don't want to talk about him, okay. Or Artie. I'm so sick of hearing about Artie and his jokes and his stupid glasses. I don't want to talk about boys with you, Brit. Not with you."
They both grew quiet again, shrinking within themselves when Quinn came back, towel in hand. Shed been standing there for a few minutes, trying to let them talk, until she realized she was eavesdropping. She had already known, of course, that Santana and Brittany had been having sex. But she didn't know how serious it was until she caught Santana crying in the locker room and realized they'd been spending so much time apart. She was so focused on Finn and Rachel that she didn't even see what was happening right under her own gaze.
"We have to get moving, you guys. The boys will be here soon."
"They get here, we make them wait. What part of the boy-girl dating dynamic don't you get? " Santana returned in a poisonous tone. She almost felt she had enough courage to say it just then, and Ms. Chastity Ring interrupts.
"This is not how I pictured this night. And your attitude is making it so much more enjoyable." Quinn said snidely as she rubbed the towel against Brittany's hair .
When Santana didn't bite back, Quinn looked over at her and saw that she was watching her too. It was as if for the first time she was trying to communicate something about the situation. Quinn picked it up immediately.
"Brittany, your hair could really benefit from an unhealthy blow dry."
"We can drive around the block and I can stick my head out of the window."
Quinn closed her eyes and shook her head at the thought, knowing Brittany has probably tried it.
"Well, it's raining. So I could just get my blow-dryer. I'll be right back."
Santana, dapping Brittany's lips with pink gloss, waited until Quinn left the room to start, but even after she was well out of hearing range she couldn't find the words to begin. Her chest felt heavy at the thought of being rejected again, but she had to try at least one more time.
"Brittany, remember that day in Glee club when we sang 'Landslide,' because I didn't know how to tell you everything I felt? I was too afraid…"
Brittany smiled slightly and nodded.
" I'm not so afraid anymore. But, I still have a song-"
"No, please. Don't say anything. I just really have to sing this to you. For you to understand me, Brittany. Alone, without pressure. I need you to really hear me."
Brittany's eyes glazed over and she nodded, placing both her hands on top of Santana's, the only sounds being the tapping of rain against Quinn's window.
Santana took a deep breath, trying to clear her throat of the tightness that came along when she though she might've started crying but it wouldn't go away. She'd have to sing in spite of it.
"We might kiss when we are alone. When nobody's watching I might take you home. We might make out when nobody's there. It's not that we're scared, it's just that it's delicate. So why'd you fill my sorrows with the words you've borrowed? From the only place you've known and why'd you sing hallelujah if it means nothing to you? Why'd you sing with me at all…?"
Santana tried to go on, but her voice cracked at the last word. It felt like Glee club all over again, she couldn't hold back her tears, but she had to let her know.
"Britt…I love you. I don't want anyone else. I don't want you to want anyone else. I want you to be happy, more than anything. But…I just want you to be happy with me. I might not be Artie, but I love you, and I just want us to be together."
She was talking into her lap, not being able to face Brittany completely after putting it all out there.
"Can I talk now?" Brittany said suddenly, bringing her face over Santana's.
"You already are…" Santana said quietly, looking up at her.
But Brittany didn't say another word. She leaned into her, drawing her in with her mouth and placed their lips together, pulling her deeper with every second. Santana was overcome with butterflies, and Brittany's hands, rubbing Santana's lower waist over her pink towel, could hardly stop shaking. Brittany missed the kissing, and the tongue, sure, but the girl was what she really pined for. Having her back, in her arms, drenched her in ecstasy; she didn't want to come up for air.
She only stopped for a moment, to look at her. To see the smile she'd been longing for.
"Sweet lady kisses." Santana whispered channeling Brittany, touching her smiling lips when she pulled back. It was almost as if she had been kissed for the first time. That was what it felt like.
Brittany laughed, and pulled Santana into her chest, wrapping her arms around her toweled body. Santana's tears were still flowing but she just felt happier, as if any doubt had flown from her body in that instant. Everything was perfect. Brittany was perfect.
Suddenly, Quinn peaked her head into the room, smiling, unaffected by their embracing.
"It stopped raining." She practically squealed, but neither of them acknowledged it.
"And," Quinn came in hesitantly and shut the door behind her, "the guys are downstairs. So you better get your story together, one way or another."
Brittany and Santana pulled away from each other and frowned. Just like that, reality had set in, and even though Santana had just witnessed first hand Brittany's real choice, she knew her surface decision would be much different. The doubt came back.
Brittany only stared at Santana, feeling so far from her all of a sudden. She hated that feeling. Gently, she placed a hand on top of Santana's and smiled. They both looked into each other's eyes and Santana waited for what felt like forever.
Brittany squeezed her hand and nodded slightly.
"I love you, too."