Invader Zim and Gaz? Never would've thought of it till recently. Starting out right in the mists of my poorly thought-out plot, which goes against my rules in general, but I'm going to do it anyway in hopes it works out better then the rest of my chapters.

Also, The Bird is a story about birds going psycho and attacking people in London, I believe. I didn't make it up.


"I just like how nobody pays attention to Dib or Zim screaming at each other in the middle of the class period and have no concern that they have no idea what either of them are talking about."

"Why would they? Wouldn't you think it was like, the best thing ever if the two class Icks were having some type of war with one another that you got to watch on a daily basis?"

-My sister and I discussing Invader Zim

Chapter 1
"Shiny Things"

"Why?" He demanded, slamming his hands on the table and leaning across it to glare at her.

She looked up at him in disbelief of two things: that he was shouting at her and that he didn't understand why not.

"What do you mean why?" She hissed, scowling at him.

He seemed flabbergasted. "I mean why won't it work? It's perfectly a reasonable and realistic theory!"

She scoffed in disbelief at him before turning her attention back to her game. "Yes, Dib. Because The Bird was based entirely off of something that really happened with birds being controlled by advanced technology of either a different species or an advanced, psychotic human."

Dib glared at his sister, sitting back down in his seat with a pouting expression. Some years ago these outbursts would have caught the attention of at least a few glances but people were officially ignoring him now, along with his younger sister. It wasn't that they were unattractive, no, not in the least. If they were normal they probably would be more popular of the kids at school, now teenagers, but that hardly mattered when you were an 'Ick'.

"You don't have to mock the idea," He complained, glaring at her. "Come on, Gaz, don't you ever consider there's something else going on in the world besides playing you hand-held games with flaming pigs in them?"

Gaz offered him another look of disapproval. "Are you trying to be funny?"

"UGH!" He shouted, throwing his arms up in defeat. "Seriously, Gaz. You're outlook on life is considerably small"

"I already know aliens exist, ones that could destroy us at any given time, should we put ourselves under their radar," She challenged back (quietly so as not be overheard, even if it was unlikely anyone was listening to them), actually keeping his gaze. "Things like trying to, oh, I don't know, hunt down a former member of their empire? Even if Zim is banished or de-charged or whatever you want to call it, you're were lucky we never got blown up because of you. Although," Gaz smirked a little at the thought, optimistically. "That would have been pretty cool to be related to the person whose fault it was the Earth got enslaved."

"Sorry I missed out on my chance to be great in you eyes," Dib replied back, his arms crossed now as he rolled his eyes at his sister's narcissism. "But I saved the Earth from Zim, like, a bunch of times! Doesn't that count for anything?"

"Mm," she seemed to consider this before shrugging and turning back to the hand-held. "Not really."

In a considerably darker mood now, Dib turned his attention back to his lunch, which he had started bringing from home a few years ago when some investigation from himself had revealed the true nature of what the cafeteria served. It was one thing to eat disgusting slop but an entirely different situation when you actually knew what was in the disgusting slop itself. To put it simply, it was worse then watching "Super-size Me" while eating McDonalds. Dib had been sick for weeks afterward and had gone so far as to actually start making Gaz lunch to prevent her insides from being poisoned any further. She had resorted to simply skipping lunch instead of having that happen, which was now the cause of her rather thin frame and maybe her pale skin. But Dib was pale too, so it was probably just genetics.

The door burst open with a loud bang but this too, was normal. It hadn't exploded or anything but he did this every day, his last defiance that he would not listen to any of the rules this filthy planet had to offer. Just because he was stuck here didn't mean he had to make the experience pleasant for anyone else. Gaz barely let her eyes flick up from the game in her hand that was the reason for her bad sitting posture. Once she saw who it was she glanced back down at her game, paying the person no more mind.

Zim eyed the ignorant classmates of him like it was his first day all over again, like he did every day, before heading to his solo table on the exact opposite side of the room from the Membrane siblings. It wasn't so much that they didn't get along as it was more out of habit then anything else. Once Dib had been informed about Zim's rather compromising situation and that he would no longer be attempting to take over the world and/or destroy it out of self-pity, the two had formed a sort of agreement not to bother each other. Dib was forever vigilant just in case Zim decided this planet was the reason for his troubles and tried to destroy it out of unresolved fury but if he hadn't done it now, he probably wasn't going to again.

The alien hadn't really changed much. Dib had wondered what he would do once they got older. If he blend into the crowd or move somewhere else. But to his surprise (and his surprise alone) Zim had actually started growing along with the rest of the humans. He was probably around the same height, which was weird, as Dib was under the impression most people of his species remained perpetually short for life. Had they been friends, maybe he would've asked but it was really none of his business so long as it wasn't anything threatening the survival of the human race.

Gaz really had no opinion on her brother's feud with Zim but it did make her curious as to why he was suddenly home a lot more often. Gaz very much enjoyed privacy and Zim had kept Dib busy for a while, so, of course, she had inquired (interrogated) her brother about what had happened. In the end he had told her (after being beaten severely) about how Zim had learned about his condition, that he was a Defect. She had let it drop then and stayed holed up in her room while Dib ran around doing . . . whatever it is Dib did. Truthfully Gaz never paid much attention to her brother's activities but they still somehow stayed close. It was a complicated relationship but it was an easy one she didn't have to think much about. Almost completely effortless.

"Zim looks off today." She heard her brother mutter in confusion. Rolling her eyes Gaz glanced over to see Zim was, in fact, doing something rather out of the ordinary. He was glaring down at his cafeteria, food, which was normal, but he was actually shaking with rage. Like the food had defied him somehow.

After watching this for a few seconds, Gaz shrugged. "Why does it-?"

Suddenly Zim stood up, knocking over his tray and shouting in rage. Some people turned there heads towards him but not many, surprisingly. Honestly, Gaz wondered if anyone would even start noticing if her, Dib, and Zim started playing with guns during the lunch period. They were so oblivious and she loathed them but it seemed to be benefiting the normally 'under the radar' disguised alien as he stormed out of the lunchroom.

Dib was quiet for a second. ". . . Do you think we should . . . ?"

Gaz snorted and turned back to her game. "I don't see why."

Her brother hesitated but eventually nodded reluctantly. "Yeah . . . I guess it's nothing."

Unfortunately they were very, very wrong.

They just wouldn't figure it out til later.

Zim slammed the door of his house shut behind him, looking for the source of his fury. If Minnie-Moose hadn't oh-so-discretely called him on his watch phone during lunch who knows what would've happened?

"Minni-Moose!" He screeched, his voice taking on a low, growling tone. "Where is he!"

"Squeak!" The obedient, floating minion replied.

He nodded briskly, storming into the kitchen to find Gir in a fetal position, rocking back and forth, his eye-sensors unnaturally large. If Zim actually cared, he might've been concerned. But Zim knew what Gir had done and so showed no sign of affection for his malfunctioning SIR unit. "Gir?"

The robot barely payed him any recognition. "So . . . many . . . shiny . . ."

"GIR!" Zim shouted now, picking him up by the neck. "What did you do to the electrical unit!"

Gir stared at Zim, but it was as if he was looking past him. "Sh-shiny . . . pain . . ." He shuddered and then began squirming in Zim's grasp.

"Stop it!" He ordered, and surprisingly, Gir obeyed. His voice was now a warning tone. Zim was furious. "Tell me what you did while you were playing with the communications system! I command you! Obey me!"

This seemed to snap Gir out of it. He seemed to be suddenly aware of Zim and his face wilted into something between panic and dismay. "Oh, master, it was horrible! The house bit me! It bit me!"

"I did not!" The house computer complained, disgruntled.

Zim ignored it, pretending to be understanding and hiding his fury deceptively from Gir, hoping this would get a better reaction out of him. "Yes, I'm sure it did."


"Now," Zim continued, setting Gir back on his feet and kneeling to be eye-level with Gir in a serious manner. "What happened?"

Shaking like a leaf, his suddenly pitiful minion began to explain. "The buttons . . . there were so many of them! And I just wanted a place to put my piggy and it was so big and shiny and I just touched it!" He wailed. "And it bit me! But then," his face became intrigued. "This ladies face popped up! She was so weird, masta-!"

"He called Tak." The computer informed Zim. "Shall I play the transition for you, Master?"

Resisting the urge to order Gir to self-destruct then and there, he took a deep breath and sighed. "Yes, though, I think I can expect what's coming."

"Squeak," Minnie-Moose said warily.

Zim's brow rose, "Eh? What do you mean 'it's not what you think'? Zim knows all!"

The room darkened as the computer let down a flat-screen from the roof, projecting how the scene progressed. It showed Gir, electrocuting himself on the system. Zim rolled his eyes and looked at the still twitching SIR unit beside him. He'd probably have to do repairs for him to stop looking like such a spaz. Or, well, more of one then usual. His attention was drawn back to the screen as it showed the lights flickering and the main-screen staticking before it flickered into a view of Tak, yelling at someone.

"Hello?" She demanded, peering into the screen. Her eyes narrowed. "Gir, is that you? What are you doing calling me? How dare you-!"

Tak's voice cut off as a crash rocked whatever space pod she was trapped in and she looked to her left. Suddenly a blood curdling scream emanated from her mouth as both she and MIMI pressed themselves up against the farthest corner of the wall, Tak pointing fearfully at something out of view.

Her face flickered back to the screen and realizing it was still on she gripped the camera fearfully. "Zim, I hate you, and if I ever see you again I will destroy you, but if you get this message then know that the Valkians are in your vicinity! They're right-!"

She cut off with another scream as a green lazor shot through the window.

Then the transmission died.

The house pulled the screen back out of view and Zim sat, dumbstruck, blinking in surprise. Gir began to roll around on the floor again and Minnie-Moose hovered over to where Zim sat, looking as concerned as a floating ball of moose could.

"Squeak?" It asked, obviously frightened at Zim's reaction.

Zim shook his head quickly, dispelling his surprise and standing up. "It's nothing to worry about. The Valkians have much better things to do then go after a pitiful planet such as Earth. I highly doubt they'll come here." He then proceeded to grab Gir by the foot and drag him towards the toilet. "In the meantime, I'll keep a vigilant eye anyways, just in case. Right now though, I'm going to have to run some diagnostic tests on Gir to make sure he's not damaged permanently and- WHY AM I TALKING TO MYSELF?"

Shaking this momentary spurt of insanity off, he quickly descended into his lab, dragging Gir (who looked like he was as close to a panic attack as a malfunctioning SIR unit could get) behind him.

An alarm went off.

"Proximity warning."

Gaz was walking home alone today. Unable to shake off Zim's weird attitude, Dib had gone home early to check on his scanners.

She hadn't really been bothered about it. Gaz walked home all the time. Plus, nobody messed with her. And if they did mess with her, their father had enrolled both her and Dib into an advanced self-defense class. Both of them were naturals so it wasn't like she couldn't take care of herself.

Despite her dark nature, Gaz had no problems wearing skirts. She thought the cliche that mean-tempered people refused to wear them was prejudicial and dumb, and had no problem defying the stereotypes. Today was slightly hot, and she had dawned a short gray skirt, a purple tank top and a gray combat vest with black boots. Around her neck was the skull necklace she had grown rather accustomed to. Slung over her shoulder was her black messenger back, with a special pocket for her gaming system, so it would be comfortable. That took priority over schoolwork, which was boring. Her father had told them they would be enrolling in his studies the second they graduated anyways. What was the point?

A hot air draft flowed towards her, carrying with it the smell of something burning. Curious, Gaz looked up from her screen to see an almost invisible smoke trail billowing up from the field, behind the park, which kids rarely played at. It was more of a thrown-together, colorful construction zone then a playground. Gaz glanced around, wondering if everyone else was just absent or completely ignoring the smell of flames. Seeing no other person around but a few passing cars, she frowned.

After a moment of thought, Gaz slipped the game into the appropriate pocket and slung the bag tighter over her shoulder and heading towards it. Maybe it was none of her business but it was still a pretty good day when she got to see a forest fire . . . that wasn't started by her.

Gaz scowled at the eerily deserted playground as she passed it, wondering just how stable the structures weer. This place held bad memories of her and Dib, when they were kids, on the swings. Dibs had broken, making him hit the ground, had. She had started to laugh at him, vicious even at three, when her father had scolded her. Also, more importantly, she had got a splinter from that stupid slide the first time she'd gone on it.

These memories were tossed aside as soon as she reached the edge of the undergrowth, looking around and pausing a moment. She wasn't sure if you were allowed back here and not wanting to risk it, pull her black, hooded jacket out of her bag and threw it on, ignoring the heat for the moment. She zipped it up to her neck, making sure her face was in the shadows in case any cameras were around to capture it. It was unlikely, but you never knew these days.

Walking on, following the source of smoke that only seemed to be getting bigger, Gaz started to wonder what kind of chaos could be created from a dry-heat forest fire. Would the school be burnt down? Any houses? The thought intrigued her as her imagination ran away with her and a smirk began to appear on her face.

She was then sorely disappointed to find nothing but what looked like a flaming technology device. Her brow rose as she started walking towards it. Whatever it was had long been burning as it was now blackened. If something had been inside, it probably hadn't survived the crash. Thinking of nothing better to do, Gaz proceeded to walk over and puncture the device with a well aimed kick. What had probably been the window of the spacecraft spider-webbed and shattered, spilling out its charred contents. It all looked like scrap metal, no body to be found. With a disappointed sigh, Gaz rolled her eyes.

"You there! Who are you! What are you doing to that ship!"

Gaz whirled around, recognizing the voice at once. "Calm down, Zim. It's just me."

Zim, surprisingly out of his disguise, came from the shadows as he lowered some type of weapon looking thing. Gaz paid it no mind. She highly doubted he would shoot her now that she'd identified herself. "Gaz-human? What are you doing here playing with alien technology?"

She glanced at the flaming mass next to her. "Looks more like fire fodder to me."

Zim snorted haughtily, walking towards her and placing the gun on the strap around his shoulder, pulling out some type of gameboy looking thing. Gaz guessed it was a scanner and was proved right as a red light came out, graphing the remains and probing to see what they could find. When a low beep came out, Zim seemed satisfied. "Well, nothing got crisped in ashes in there, that's for sure. As much as I hate Tak, that's a relief."

"Wait, what?" Gaz asked, confused. "I thought Dib had Tak's ship."

Once again the alien scoffed at her. "Foolish human. Tak has been gone for years. Obviously she would have acquired a new one by now."

Gaz scowled at him. She inwardly cursed herself for not assuming that already. Refusing to admit she had a momentary lapse of rational thought, she retorted with, "Well excuse me for not assuming she was punished for her failure instead of rewarded, Zim."

Even she was impressed by how reasonable that sounded.

Zim opened his mouth to object, but paused. He quickly changed the subject. "Why are you wearing that ridiculous hood over your head? Aren't you earthlings uncomfortable in temperatures such as this?"

"I thought there might be cameras around," Gaz replied with a shrug as she removed her hood. "But obviously, since your comfortable without your disguise, I should be safe from getting arrested for trespassing."

Zim rolled his eyes. "Of course I checked for any recording devices in the area before coming here. Otherwise, I would've just left the ship to burn. Its almost unrecognizable anyways."

Gaz squatted down, thankful no one else was around to see her do this lest they make some sort of comment about getting on her knees. Zim was far too ignorant to the sexual comments made by teenagers to be at risk and she'd just punch him if he made any sort of remark anyways. She peered further as something caught her eye in the rubble, glinting with an odd sheen that seemed untouched. "Hey, I think there's something in there."

"What?" Zim demanded, in disbelief. "Impossible. My sensors detected no lifeforms."

"It looks like a toy, not a creature." Gaz countered, slipping off her jacket. It was not flammable, thanks to her father's comment on how 'you could never be to careful when you were the child of an ingenious scientist'. She wrapped it around her hand, slipping it inside. She could feel Zim's curious eyes on her and saw that he too was now squatting, trying to see what she saw in the hole she had created.

She pushed off the ash clumps, snagging the sole survivor of the devastating crash like an oven-mit gripping a pan, sliding her hand out carefully to avoid getting cut on the sharp, jagged edges of glass. When it was out it was still dirty and ashy, and Gaz placed her hand close to the device that looked like a broken circle. Surprised to find it was not hot she blew on it, wiping her jacket coat to try and get the ash off of it.

Zim peered at it closely. "Hmm. I'm unfamiliar with this technology. Tak must have got an upgrade since we last saw each other." He lost interest, walking back towards the ship and running what seemed like more tests on it.

"I guess," Gaz muttered, stopping when she recognized the odd onyx color with a slightly blue sheen. White, oval diamonds were placed in a pattern every few centimeters and Gaz was fascinated by the look of it. "It looks like a broken bracelet."

"Wait, what?" Zim said, his head snapping up.

"See?" She said, starting to put the two broken pieces together. "Look, I think they connect right-."

"Gaz, no!" Zim shouted, realization hitting him like a ton of bricks.

But it was too late. The magnetic pull finished the rest, locking the pieces together. The white diamonds glowed a moment before expanding and jerking, latching onto Gaz's wrist. She immediately tried to shove it off but then it contrasted, pulling in so it fit just around her thin wrist. She jerked violently at it, trying to get it off to no avail. Zim placed something on the ground next to the cruiser before hurrying over to Gaz, grabbing her arm roughly to examine it. Gaz glared for his harsh movement but he paid it no mind as he twisted her arm this way and that. The glow faded and he growled.

"Come with me," He ordered, furious now, as he dragged her towards his space ship.

Gaz jerked her arm away. "I can walk on my own, thanks."

Zim glared at her but didn't object. He turned though, back towards the burning wreckage when they had gotten a bit farther away, to the edge of the clearing, and hit a button on his sensor device. The ship suddenly exploded, completely obliterated now.

"Just in case," he muttered before heading forward again, leading the way to the ship.

YAAAAY for first chapter!

Tak makes a couple guest appearances, but, this is one of them. She's kind of a background important key to the story I guess.

Till next chapter.