Kakuzu opened his eyes a crack as he heard the keys jangle in the distance. A dull click and a metallic clang later, another heavy barred gate slid open, grating against the concrete prison floor. The sound resonated and bounced off the grey walls. A few inmates stirred; he could hear some of them sit up in their beds, the familiar creak of sagging metal springs echoing in a chorus along the corridor. There was a visitor, and they were curious.

But not him.

Kakuzu sighed, annoyed, and rolled onto his side to face the wall. He was going back to sleep.

Army boots marched heavily in tune as they approached his cell. A few inmates, ex-soldiers themselves, but thrown in here for making the wrong decision, jeered at the passing guards. The screeching laughter and taunts echoed and bounced off the prison walls, the cacophony tunneling through the corridors and out through the barred windows. Kakuzu pulled his flimsy blanket high over his head, his feet now exposed to the chilly purified air that circled the building. In that entire din, he could still distinctly make out the lone pair of footsteps that tread out of tune – a slow, lackadaisical stride.

Another jangle of keys, another clang, and then the door to his cell finally opened. There were whispers on the other side, and the door slammed shut again. More bolts, more clicks. The lazy footsteps tread closer, until they stopped right beside his bed.

"The least you can do is greet me, lazy old man." Again, that same mocking voice.

"And give you an invitation to ruin my day?" He scooted closer to the wall. "I have better things to do."

"Oh?" Kakuzu frowned. He could hear the footsteps move again, and then there was the expected screech of heavy wood against the floor as the other man dragged a chair next to the bed. "Tell me about these 'other' things that you speak of."

Kakuzu didn't indulge him, choosing to remain silent instead. He waited for the inevitable:

"You know I could be putting my time to better use instead of wasting my mornings visiting a pathetic loser like you in prison."

The blanket around him tightened, and his frown deepened. "Why don't you do just that and do us both a favor?"

"I can't, Kakuzu. As a man of religion, I must put aside my personal preferences and work for the spiritual betterment of others less fortunate than I am."

"So you're doing this out of obligation?"

"Of course. Everything I do is out of obligation to Jashin-sama." Hidan leaned back in his chair and smirked at the broad back of the man he was seated across from. He'd been visiting the man for three weeks now, sent by the Order to try and get him to convert. Why they thought he was an interesting addition he had no clue. In his opinion, Kakuzu was just another lost soul, a sinner, a damned atheist, proud, and too stubborn to even attempt to listen to the teachings of Jashin. The only time the big man had showed some interest in him was on the very first day. After that, they mostly spent their 'therapeutic healing sessions' with Kakuzu facing the wall, and Hidan staring at his broad back and cursing piousness into him.

Hidan shifted in his seat and adjusted his robe. The long silver rosary that adorned his neck and chest reflected the few rays of sunlight seeping into the cell and bounced off onto the wall and Kakuzu's back. His pendant reflected a shimmering myriad of colors on the prisoner's lower shoulder. He grinned.

Minutes passed in silence between them and Kakuzu still hadn't moved. "You only have a week left to live, bastard." Hidan mumbled impatiently, finger tapping his knee. He moved one leg from side to side at the knee, his black robe waving softly near his ankles.

"Which is exactly why you should respect my final wishes to be left alone and in peace," came the gruff reply from within the blanket.

Hidan frowned, his fingers suddenly coming to grip his knee. His leg stopped moving. "Fuck you Kakuzu!" The young priest pressed his feet firmly onto the floor, putting pressure on his knees as he leaned forward. "Don't you even care that you will be roasting your fucking insides on the electric chair around this time next Friday?"

A low sigh was the only response he got from the inmate.

This indifference irked Hidan and he rose abruptly, his robe falling slightly down his shoulders and exposing more of his smooth, muscular chest. The chair rocked a little along its line of center of gravity but didn't fall. Instead, it steadied itself with a sharp clack. "Aren't you worried about where you might end up once you die?"

"I'll either end up in some makeshift grave or be sent to the medical schools for dissection practice."

"With that attitude, you're ending up in hell."

"What are you suggesting? That I adopt your attitude?"

"Tch! Bastard!" Hidan found himself resisting the urge to maul the man reclining calmly before him. "You will end up sharing the same fate as the heathens."

"I am so afraid."

"You should be."

More silence ensued, and Kakuzu could hear Hidan's teeth grinding in his jaw, even from this distance. Of course Kakuzu smirked; he was reveling in the other man's frustration. He didn't want anything to do with religion, and he most certainly didn't want to embrace this crack teaching that Hidan spoke of. Why his lawyer hadn't sent him a less annoying Catholic priest was something he still hadn't figured out the answer to. But then again, a Catholic priest would have been just as annoying. More so because unlike Hidan, they wouldn't have expressed themselves so colorfully: he would have had to endure long flowery speeches in a vocabulary so pretentious and obsolete it made his skin crawl.

That, and they would have been dead already. Kakuzu had attempted silencing Hidan the easy way: pounding him into the wall with his iron fists and strangling the breath out of him. But the man had avoided every single attack, countering his moves with nimble and almost equally powerful strikes of his own. This priest was different, he figured, and had forced himself to sit down and bear with him after that. There was no other option, since it seemed that the man came back every morning and he was forced to endure three whole hours with Hidan every single day of his month in Death Row. He secretly reassured himself that the chair would be more bearable than the Jashinist's voice.

There was no more violence on his part, but the annoying preaching continued. So did the indifference, which only fuelled more religious outbursts.

"Why do you come?" Kakuzu finally spoke, interrupting the silence.

Hidan sighed in exasperation. "Why the fuck do you think, bastard?" he gritted out. "To save your damned soul is why I come here every single fucking day, and all you ever do is sleep through the whole fucking morning."

"What would it take for you to go away and never come back?"

"Embrace Jashin as your savior, your protector. Give up your body and soul to His service and you won't be needing me to hang around you for guidance, because He will be your light."

Kakuzu rolled his eyes. As if he needed protection. No religion was going to save him from death. Death was a phase of life and nothing could stop it. It was the universal fate that befell every being that came to life. Only idiots like Hidan, who were looking for a way out, didn't understand that. "You want me to convert." As if he needed Hidan.

"In other words, yes." Hidan's violet orbs burned a disgusted glare into the dirty blanket over the other man's shoulder.


The glare softened, now replaced by confusion. "What?"

There was a creak- the metal springs grating in protest as Kakuzu moved in his bed. The big man rolled onto his other side, now facing Hidan, before sitting up. The blanket slid off his shoulders and piercing green eyes focused themselves on Hidan. An unsettling smile curled at the ends of his lips. "Fine."

"Tch!" Hidan still stared at him, confused. What exactly did he mean by 'fine'?

"I'll convert."

Hidan's frown deepened. "You can't just convert, bastard!" The young priest fell back onto his chair, now at eye level with Kakuzu. He leaned forward, glaring right into the inmate's eyes. "You can't convert for the sake of converting."

"I'll convert," Kakuzu repeated, leaning forward just an inch now, a knowing smirk tugging at the stitches on his dark skin. "Isn't that what you want?"

In that fleeting moment, Hidan almost flinched. The hard expression in his eyes wavered, violet orbs flickering in the dim light as they stared at Kakuzu in a mixture of disbelief and amusement. Impressive, he thought. I've been found out. Perceptive bastard. A grin tugged on the corners of his mouth. "How did you figure that out?"

Kakuzu nearly scoffed. "Any idiot would have figured it out."

Hidan frowned again, bit his lip, and leaned back in his chair. "If you knew, why the fuck did you wait till today just to tell me that?"

"I wanted to gauge how badly you wanted it." Pretty bad, he supposed, considering how many hours Hidan had actually chosen to spend with him, despite knowing it was a lost cause.

Yes, he had been pretty desperate. It was a direct mission dictated to him by the Order, a challenge he could not pass up, and it came with the promise of being anointed into the higher ranks. But why Kakuzu, he wondered. Why this man, this apathetic jaded man who cared naught about religion? Hidan studied the taller man carefully, considering the options. "What's the catch?"

Kakuzu chuckled, bringing his legs up to cross them on the bed. He leaned forward, bringing his face closer to Hidan's. "Hmm…" He raised a hand gingerly to brush against the loose fabric that threatened to slide right off Hidan's shoulder. Hidan felt goose-bumps prickle along the path that Kakuzu's fingers took.

"How bad do you want the promotion?"

Hidan smirked, looking him squarely in the eyes. Seems Kakuzu had read right through him. He didn't recoil when the bigger man brought his face close to his. "What are you offering?" He figured Kakuzu wasn't planning on converting for free. And he had a pretty good idea about iwhat/i Kakuzu wanted from him right now. And in all honesty, he was willing to give him what he wanted, if it would mean he got to rise up in rank among the Order. He knew that giving Kakuzu what he wanted right now would be breaking his sacred vows, but the prospect of being accepted into the higher ranks seemed to overshadow his hesitance. Oh, sweet temptation.

"Heh." Kakuzu leaned back, scooting up to lean against the wall as he did so. His legs came uncrossed and he bent his knees, bringing up his arms and resting them by the elbows on them. He gave the priest a casual once-over, tilting his head to a side as he let a side smile play out on his stitched face. "What I have to offer depends on the quality of your goods," he drawled, mischief evident in his eyes.

Hidan scoffed. "You're fucking doubting the quality of my goods, old man?" He stood up, violently pushing the chair back so that it fell crashing to the floor. "It's not like you deserve anything of quality, heathen." He undid the tie in the middle of his robe and held the inside edges of the long black garment before pulling it open, letting it slide down his arms and pool in a heap around his ankles.

Kakuzu scanned the torso of the other man before him, silently taking in the toned muscles and perfect skin. What did Jashin priests do exactly? Work out the whole day? Because Hidan didn't seem very priestly looking like this. His gaze trailed downwards, starting at the other man's shoulders. They scanned those toned pectorals, noticing in the little light filtering into the room, how perfectly his nipples sat on tight mounds of flesh. Hidan's abs were another thing, and Kakuzu seriously began to doubt this man was a priest. No priest he knew had such a perfect physique. Green eyes travelled lower as they followed the grooves leading to his groin a few inches from his navel. They met with black fabric, obstructing his view. His expression didn't betray his approval of the 'quality' of goods presented to him though, and he merely pointed to the low pants resting loosely on the other man's hips, gesturing ever so subtly to take them off as well. He needed a full body inspection to be completely satisfied.

And Hidan knew he had everything for anyone to be satisfied with. The Jashinist grinned and took a step closer to the bed, slowly, almost ritual-like, undoing the cord that held the flimsy material up. He let the pants fall gracefully, standing there smugly, revealing all his glory to the inmate.

And there was much to reveal, Kakuzu noted with interest, now sitting up properly. "Turn around."

Hidan chuckled, not complying. "I'll have you remember that I'm not a fucking horse up for sale, bastard." He moved in closer and put one bended knee onto the dirty mattress. It creaked. "I'm not turning around for you." The second knee joined the previous one and Hidan stood kneeling, straddling Kakuzu's lap.

Kakuzu's gaze fell from Hidan's face to his manhood, which was now in close proximity with his own face.

"We made a deal. Now get on with it." Hidan was staring down at him, violet orbs glinting in mirth as he waited for Kakuzu to pleasure him.

At this, Kakuzu grinned. He leaned in and gave Hidan's length a playful lick, maintaining eye contact with the other man. He watched as Hidan's confident smirk faltered for a moment there. "You misunderstand, preacher," he drawled, breathing onto the other man's cock. "I never agreed to a deal where I was the one fulfilling both ends of it."

"Bastard," Hidan mumbled, frowning down at the inmate. Kakuzu put his arms behind him, palms laying flat on the mattress. He looked up at the priest and grinned wider.

Hidan didn't miss that mocking grin, and the scowl on his face only deepened. Why was he doing this again? Why was he kneeling naked in front of this sorry excuse for a human being? Oh, yes; he'd made a deal. A deal with the devil, he thought to himself. Kakuzu looked like the devil himself, stitched up and macabre. For a split second, Hidan shuddered. Was he sent here to be tested? Had the Order wanted to test his immunity to temptation? And if Kakuzu was the devil…

But no. That was ridiculous. This man was no devil; he was just another heathen that needed converting. And Hidan was so close to doing just that. He slid down, now kneeling on the floor as he cautiously undid the bigger man's pants. Having to do this to the head priest was one thing, but to a heathen? It was almost blasphemy.

His tongue flicked out as he pulled Kakuzu out of the confines of the fabric and he lapped at the head. Jashin better not punish him for this…