Summary: A doctor should know better. Fluff, drabble.
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the House MD characters, which is good since I tend to kill them.

Wilson relaxed. He dipped his left hand in the lube-filled bowl and started slowly stroking. He dipped the right one and reached inside. More, House, more. Take me, please. Please. He searched around frantically, then smiled: that would do. You're so big, House. Deeper. Deeper. YES.
He noticed when he finally opened his eyes. Shit. He climbed out of the tub and dialed 911.

Cuddy barged in House's office and put a rubber duck on his desk. "Princeton General will win this year's 'Strangest Object Found In A Human's Colon'. Don't laugh until you hear who the human is."

Author's Note: This is the result of insomnia during the Pic Prompt Challenge at sick_wilson, for the prompt rubber duck.