Just started reading a few of these so I'm not sure if this has been done yet…don't mean to offend anyone if it has…just had an idea I wanted to get out of my head.
Will Schuester walked into the Glee Club practice with a sense of purpose. He laid in bed last night trying to think of the perfect way to win Nationals when it finally hit him at 3:23am. He shot up and went straight to his notebook then to the internet in search of sheet music.
"The Rocker, The Shocker, and The Show Stopper!" He exclaimed barely having entered the practice room, waving the sheet music above his head, "But, not necessarily in that order." The students who didn't have their jaws unhinged choked on their laughter and only one was confused as to why it was such a humorous statement.
"I don't get it." Rachel stated, looking around the room at her fellow glee-clubbers, feeling left out and uncomfortable.
Puck leaned into her and whispered, "I'll explain later." She didn't know why it gave her a chill when she felt his breath tickle her ear. She decided that there must be a draft in the room and left it at that.
Will continued with his explanation, "It is our three pronged plan to win Nationals."
"Um…no offence Mr. Schue, but I really don't see how something like…" Finn raised his eyebrows, searching for the right word that wouldn't get him into trouble, "…that will help us win Nationals."
"You will. First, we have The Rocker." He proceeded to pass out sheet music to everyone but Rachel and Puck, "An Aerosmith medley."
"I get a lead." Mercedes smiled.
"It's not a lead if we're both singing it." Santana corrected her as they discovered they would share 'Walk This Way'.
"Dude Looks Like a Lady…cool…wait." Sam looked up confused at the song he would be sharing with Finn and Artie, "You're not trying to tell me something, are you Mr. Schue?"
"Love In An Elevator? Don't you think these song choices are a little risqué?" Quinn asked, eying her sheet music with Finn's arm draped over her shoulders.
Tina piped up, not willing to let Quinn take away the first real solo she'd had in competition, "Love In An Elevator is like my favorite song. I'll sing it by myself if Quinn doesn't want to join me."
"Thank you for your enthusiasm Tina but I partnered everyone up with who I thought they would complement best. You and Quinn will be singing it together. Quinn, is the song choice going to be a problem?"
She eyed the others who were shaking their heads at her, "I guess not."
"Great. Mike, Brittany, get started on the choreography. Lauren, you have a lot of confidence and great ideas, so I want you to help them." Lauren smiled, happy to help and glad to not have a solo. She was a bold woman but, singing in front of hundreds of people by herself was not something on her top ten list of things to do before she died.
"What about me Mr. Schuester?" Rachel asked, looking like a puppy who had been kicked repeatedly then left out in a rain storm and not fed for days.
"She means, what about us?" Puck corrected her, hands in the pockets of his hoodie leaning back in his chair.
Will smiled proudly, "You two…" He lifted his hands as if to accentuate the words, "…are The Show Stopper." Rachel smiled brightly and sat up straighter, "I want to see the two of you after practice with Mike and Brittany."
"Is this some kind of secret?" Finn asked, not sure why Puck would get the male lead in a song with Rachel. He was with Quinn now but, last he checked, feature songs with Rachel were his thing.
"Not a secret, I just want to make sure they can pull it off before we bring everyone else into it." He paced the room, "Now, I was wracking my brain, trying to come up with The Shocker…something that no one has ever done before…something that will leave everyone else in the dust and prove that we're the best. But, it was pretty late and I couldn't focus so I brainstormed with a friend this morning and she told me she might have an idea. That being said, assisting us with The Shocker will be Ms. Pillsbury."
Puck leaned in again and mumbled to Rachel, who still had no idea what a shocker was outside of the obvious definition, to startle or surprise, "Never thought I'd live to hear that." There was that chill again. She resolved herself to speaking to Mr. Schuester after class about the room temperature. It had to be just right in order to create the optimum environment for vocal cords.
She and Puck had recently become friends, bonding due to a Bachelor Auction put on by their Temple to benefit the rebuilding efforts for the Youth Center. No one is sure what caused it to erupt into flames and anyone who might know, isn't talking. He didn't want to be on the auction block. His mother forced him into it and he'd be damned if he was going to let some cougar snatch him up with her husband's money. He was over the older woman thing and had set his sights on someone significantly less wrinkly and much cuter. There was still his relationship with Lauren to deal with but he had been gradually building up the courage to break things off with her for a few weeks. Sure he was the resident school badass, and anyone who said otherwise would end up in a dumpster, but Lauren Zizes was one scary chick.
He persuaded Rachel to bid on him, stopping his mother's heart in the process at the prospect of her son finally bringing home a nice Jewish girl. She had been scouting Rachel Berry as a daughter in law ever since they attended daycare together at Kosher Kiddies when they were two. He offered to pay her back, especially considering she had to spend quite a bit to outbid Dr. Weinstein's wife, and he would swear he saw his mother slide a wad of cash to Rachel under the table when the bidding got particularly heated. For some reason, she refused his offer to forget the whole thing happened and told him, with her head held high and that cute smile she threw around without even knowing the power it held, "I paid for a date with Noah Puckerman and a date with Noah Puckerman is what I'll get." Who was he to argue with her?
Puck was never good at dating or relationships but, when he was with Rachel for a whole week, he tried to be. Aside from Lauren, it was the hardest he had ever tried for anyone and he kind of liked it. The way she rinsed the slushy from his hair, the way her little body fit under his when they made out in her room, the fact that she pushed him to do his homework before said making out was ever permitted to start, how she encouraged him to study for a test with boob grazing as a reward.
He liked Lauren, but she never expected much out of him. She actually tried to make trouble for him what with the whole sex tape idea and telling him to blow off his school work to take her to the drive-thru or encouraging him to keep going to his fight club. You can be damn sure that if Rachel Berry ever found out he was still doing that, she'd roll up into the warehouse, threaten to call mothers or wives or whatever, until everyone ran home with their tails between their legs, then drag him out by his ear. He liked that too…and he missed it.
So, when he was indebted to her with a date, he decided he was going to give her her money's worth. He'd deny his actions if anyone on the football team asked about it. He did have a rep to maintain but he also knew he didn't want to blow another chance with Rachel. This wasn't just going to be another Breadstix dine and dash then sex in the back of his truck date. This was going to be a "Make Rachel Berry forget who the hell Finn Hudson is and, in the process, realize she might have feelings for Noah Puckerman" date. He even recruited the help of his mother. She beamed with pride and proceeded to go on and on about vegan something and a picnic basket she found at the store a few months ago because, "You know, just in case an occasion such as this should ever present itself."
When he pulled up in her drive way, wearing a nice pair of jeans and a button up shirt, he got out of the truck, holding a single wildflower he pulled over on the side of the road to pick, walked to the door, and knocked instead of slamming on the horn until she came out. One of her fathers answered and actually shook his hand before turning over his shoulder and calling Rachel. She flew down the steps, in a flowery sundress, and stopped suddenly when she took in his entire appearance. He wasn't sure but he thought she might have gasped.
He awkwardly shot out the hand holding the flower to her, "I…uh…saw this and thought you might like it or whatever." He didn't know if it was the lighting or what but he could have sworn her eyes started misting over. Great, he made her cry.
"Thank you Noah." She smiled at him, "It's beautiful."
Her father cleared his throat, breaking them both from the trance they had been in, "I think you two should be going. Have her home by ten."
"Yes sir." Puck nodded, having no idea where 'Sir' came from but figured it must have been from never having met the father of one of his 'dates' before. It was nice in an uncomfortable, scary sort of way.
The sun was starting to set when they arrived at the park. He ran to her side of the truck, opened her door for her, and even offered his hand to help her out, surprised to see her still holding on to her flower. Puck then congratulated himself at being pretty good at the whole gentleman thing and remembering everything his mother and sister had told him to do. When she saw him grab the picnic basket, he was certain he heard another gasp and fought the goofy grin struggling to make it's way to the surface. He was still the Puckersaurus Rex, after all. Guys like him didn't break out into goofy grins over impressing a girl, they smirked slyly once they got into said girls panties. She linked her arm with his and allowed him to lead her a spot in the grass. He laid a blanket down and pulled out the Tupperware containers of food his mother helped him prepare. There was that smile again when he explained everything they were eating was completely vegan. They talked, laid back and stared at the stars, laughed and even stayed in a comfortable silence for a short while.
Things came to a screeching halt when she felt the need to say, "I've had a great time tonight, Noah. Lauren is a very lucky girl."
Lauren…right. He almost forgot they were still together but, apparently, Rachel hadn't. It could have been worse. At least she didn't bring up that ass hat Finnessa and the many reasons why he should still be in love with her. Puck decided, then and there, that he was going to do things right, break up with Lauren first, then ask Rachel out again on another date. If he could find a way to make that date better than this one and it resulted in Rachel Berry on her back with her legs spread, hey…all the better.
He just had no idea how difficult breaking up with Lauren Zizes would be. In the few weeks following their date, Puck continued to spend time with Rachel. He convinced Lauren to sit with her and the other gleeks at lunch, gave her a ride home from school when Lauren had her mixed martial arts class, and watched movies at her house a few times, not minding that her dads sat in the room with them. They were actually pretty cool and one even talked about giving himself a Mohawk. No one could ever say badassness wasn't contagious. Hell, if it weren't for the thought of Lauren hanging over his head, he'd say he and Rachel were practically an item already.
And damn if he didn't even know whether she wanted to be with him or if she was still hung up on Hudson. Finn was something they never talked about and he preferred it that way. He knew, should he ever get together with Rachel, everyone including his ex-best friend would give him crap over it but, to be with someone who made him feel good about himself for once, someone who made him want to stretch his aspirations beyond the city limits of Lima, it was going to be worth it. Besides, nailing a virgin is always epic. He felt the need to keep balancing queer thoughts out with dirty ones, just to remind himself of the fact that he was still a BAMF.
He was pulled from his thoughts when Lauren tugged on his sleeve, "Make your secret meeting quick. I need you to take me to the mall." He exhaled in defeat and nodded, still unsure of how to break things off with her then turn around and start chasing Rachel without getting his (or Rachel's) ass kicked in the process.
When the majority of the Glee Club cleared out, Puck, Rachel, Mike, and Brittany approached the front of the room to finally find out what Mr. Schuester was planning for them. It wasn't a moment too soon because Rachel looked like she was about to spontaneously combust from the excitement of the unknown.
Will looked at the group, "Show choir has always been about big production numbers filled with intricate choreography and elaborate costumes…but we're going to strip all that away-"
"We're going to be naked?" Puck asked, still not sure of where this was going, but liking the prospect of being naked with Rachel. Naked with Mike, not so much. Being a gentleman is alright but, he was still Puck after all. His daydreams didn't center around hand holding and dancing in a field of daisies, they centered around two smoking hot Jews sweating and panting each other's names. If cuddling and pet names came along with that then he was willing to make the sacrifice.
Will stared at him, mouth slightly open for a brief moment, "No. We're going to do a number that centers around emotion. Raw and pure…to be specific, longing. I want graceful movements, simple costumes. It will be something they're not expecting."
"And you chose us?" Even Puck wasn't sure why he was chosen for this over Finn.
"Well, I obviously need Mike and Brittany to choreograph what I have in mind but I need you two to be able to convince the audience that you want each other more than anything else. That there's no one on this earth who you would rather be with. That Rachel ends where Puck begins and vice versa and I don't just mean the cheesy smiles and hand holding that Rachel and Finn have done in the past." Puck glanced at Rachel to see her reaction at the mention of Finn's name. He smirked when she didn't even flinch, just listened eagerly to Mr. Schuester as he continued, "I need you to make them think you're completely and totally in love with one another. If you two can do that, this will be a Show Stopper the likes of which no ones ever seen." He smiled proudly at the group.
"I think we can do that Mr. Schue." It was Puck who spoke for the group as the others nodded in agreement.
Will held his smile, certain that this was going to be their year, "Great." He reached into his bang and pulled out the sheet music, handing a copy to Puck and Rachel. He then gave Mike and Brittany each a CD with the song on it, "See what you can come up with this weekend."