This brilliant or not so brilliant piece of absurdity was born while i was in my class today. it started as a simple random game between me and my friend Katara. me acting as Harry and she as Draco. but then i came home and this evovled into something a little more serious. please tell me how you like it.


DISCLAIMER: really? mine? if i were to say that, i'll probably be Avada Kedavar'd in my sleep. NO! not mine. oh how hurt i am. its all JKR's. yes. so dont sue me.

Binn's class was as boring as always. Having nothing to do, Harry looked around and watched Malfoy glaring heatedly at his face. He ignored then finally getting irritated he took out a parchment and wrote down on it.

I hate you.

As expected the reply came seconds later.

I Don't love you either.

I don't want you to.

Not that I'm ever going to.

Not that I'm ever going to wish you to.

I want to hit to.

I'm too clever to let you.

Huh, who knew silent verbal fights were such a good pass time. Why hadn't he thought of it before?

It will be a surprise.

You already told me so it won't.

I won't tell you now.

Too late.

I don't want to hurt you.

That is an improvement.

Now I would kill you.

With what exactly? Your heart-stopping scowl? Harry chucled.

It will be a surprise.

I love surprises.

You will love it, Potter.

I repeat I hate you.

And I love you.

You liar!

Malfoy's don't lie.

And I'm a squib.

You are a ravishing wizard.

And you are a pompous prat.

I wish I could lock you in a dark room.

I'm a wizard, dunce. I can escape.

I want you to be mine, so I'll put you under my spell. Harry shuddered as Malfoy's eyes darted toward him, dark with he didn't know what.

Futile attempts, kitty.

This is becoming boring. You don't even flirt back.

Oh I'm sorry, my lord, why don't you consider calling your house elf and he can fawn over you.

I'd rather be with you than my house elf.

And I'd rather be with a house elf than be with you.

Oh you hurt me! he laughed silently as Malfoy clutched at his heart and bended over.

Are all purebloods such drama queens?

Well, not really. I'm one of a kind you know.

Yeah you're the only git who would try to lure me with a false attempt at romance.

I'm going on a date on Monday.

Yeah? I pity your date. Wish I could tag along to see when they run from you in horror.

I would love for you to come.

Did i tell you I hate you?

I hate you more.

I hate you more yet.

If I don't get a boyfriend by Monday, I'll get a girl friend.

Please do, by all means.

Does nothing make you jealous?

What, was that supposed to make me jealous? I was about to offer my condolences.

I will tell you about her. Give you all the details.

Excuse me from the details, If you please.

Why, you scared, Gryffindor?

Very mild insult, Malfoy. Would hardly motivate me.

Fine then. I have decided to not give the details.

I can't thank you enough.

I can't share our private moments with other stupid, witless, jealous, envious Gryffindors.

I also don't relish the thought of sharing your "private moments". Harry crinkled his nose.

You're jealous, ha! I knew it. Don't worry, I'm not getting a girlfriend cause I already have a boyfriend.

Spare me this onerous piece of information too.

You are him, of course.

Am freaking not!

Yes you are. You are a friend and a boy.

When you put it that way. But as far as I recollect, you and I are not really friends, you know.

Oh of course we are.

Do I need to spell it out for you? Well hear me well and loud, Malfoy. WE ARE ENEMIES.

Not anymore.

Says who?

Says me.

Well fuck me, Malfoy.

Don't tempt with such ideas. If you haven't noticed we are in the middle of the class.

Trust me, your being "tempted" doesn't require such ideas.

Mmmm. Right now I'm thinking of my bed.

Dream on, prat. I just this class was over already.

Now now Potter, you cant say such things being the Golden Boy and all that.

Bite me!

Oooh! Really? I would love to.

You pervert!

You were the one handing out invitations.

It's a damned figure of speech.

Putting the blame on me, trying to get my attention, Potter?

I'm feeling like a Slytherin.

That's great! Maybe I can teach you other Slytherin traits?

Or maybe NOT.

I hate you.

How gracious of you.

I love you.

I think I'm going to be sick.

Oh no, Binns would soon be gone. Then it will be you, me and the empty class room.

What class room?

This class room. Honestly Potter how thick can you be?

And what exactly are you going to do about after the class in an empty class room?

Stick around and you'll see.

Don't be a prick, Malfoy.

Oh well, how about I lock you in this class with me until you promise to go on a date with me.

You are now officially out of your mind. Congratulations.

Oh no, dear Gryffindor. It's you who will be out of your mind.

Have you been hit with a curse lately?

Yeah. The curse of love! Your love!

Errrr .. You really are mental.

Yup. So what do you think now?

I think I should just, you know, leave with Hermione.

Her! Of all the people in the world, her!

What is wrong with Hermione?

Err nothing, of course. Except that she is a bossy know-it-all who threatens to hex me out of existence every time I so much as look at you.

She gets that way sometimes.

Gets that way? Does she threaten you? Draco's eyes rounded.

No. I'm not the idiot to go around prattling about torturing my house elf, do I?

Wish Binns would die.

He's already dead. Honestly, Malfoy, you put all the blondes to shame.

And your eyes put all the emeralds to shame.

I wish you would die.

Would not help you, sweetheart. I'll wait for you in Heaven.

Oh no, sweetheart, I'm sure you will rot in hell.

Nobody who loves the Savior can rot in hell.

Of course not. You will be first crucioed and then thrown headlong into the valley of death prepared only for your Excellency.

Not in a good mood I see. I'll just wait for you to come around.

Come around? To hell? What makes you think I will NOT got to Heaven after all I have done for you Deranged people!

I never said you won't go to heaven.

And you had better not.

Fine. What ever makes you happy.

Don't go all sloppy on me, Malfoy.

But Harry you have such a profound goodness how can you be so cruel to me.

Like this. *sticks his tongue out at him*

Awww. You look so cute.

Cute? Did you just call me CUTE!

Yes. And ravishing.

How I hate you. Why could not you have been Voldemort? I would have so happily killed you.

But, Harry, my love—

Gah! Since when do you call me Harry?

Since the moment I realized that you are my one and only love.

You don't love me Malfoy. Stop saying that!

But I do, Harry. And I can't help it. You are so irresistible. Why, don't you like it?

Like it? LIKE IT? I'm—you are—I'm a boy! You are a boy!

I'm well aware of these facts, thank you very much.

So! Are you really pulling a prank on me cause if you—

Love is blind, Potter.

You are blind. I have eyes…and taste.

Don't you talk about taste. Of all the Hogwarts you fell for Chang and then Weaslette.

Yeah, and who did you fall for? Parkinson, Crabbe or Goyle? I have never been able to figure out.

Ha Potter. You are just jealous. All the Hogwarts girls desire me.

Exactly! Girls! Girls may desire you. I harbor no such demonic wish.

May I leak this information to the girls that their wishes are demonic?

Go on. Its not I who moves around with a cluster of girls. And I assure you, Hermione would be more than willing to retaliate for such an act of kindness.

No! Not her! Look, why don't you get it, Potter. My heart melts when I look at you.

I seriously think someone slipped you a love potion.

I'm enchanted. By you. Give me a chance at least.

One reason why I should not kick you arse.

I'm asking you. Myself! Me!

Of course. Mr. aristocratic. I'm just dying to comply to your wishes.

Please Harry. If you don't give me a chance I'll just have to go to the great hall and confess my love for you.

Do it, by all means.

Nothing affects you, does it?

Regarding you. I long learned to tune you out.

So what was this little chat about.

Passing time.

Moronic Gryffindor. You sure you are not Slytherin? You almost had me believi—

The bell rings.

Al last. See you around, Malfoy.

"Its Draco." Draco muttered looking at Harry's retreating back.

Much to Harry's disappointment Draco was not bluffing when he talked about announcing his love for him. So while at breakfast settling in between Hermione and Neville, both of whom were babbling on about their respective subjects, neither listening the other, a sudden hush fell over the hall.

Then a small tinkling voice caught everyone's attention and everybody craned their necks to see where the sound had come from. To their surprise it was the Slytherins and not the Gryffindors, for once, who were in chaos. After making sure that he had every body's attention, Draco stepped up on the table, ignoring the other Slytherins' attempt to snap him out of the trance. Once there he looked straight down into Harry's eyes and began speaking.

"As you all know, that I, Draco Malfoy, have long confessed to be a bisexual, it is time—" the crowd started murmuring over this much discussed piece of news, Draco resumed to shouting " Oi! You idiots! Listen to me! I, Draco Malfoy, do hereby declare that I'm officially in love with a certain Gryffindor known around as Harry Potter and pledge my life, my wealth, my magic and my body to him and am as of this moment at his service." There were loud catcalls and sighs at the last part. Draco sweeping a bow jumped down and firmly walked over to Harry. Who sat with his cheeks flaming and his eyes peeled to the size of saucers. He remained in shock as another wave of magic fused into is chest as Draco's pledge got absorbed in his magic core. Draco reached him and stood before him.

"Will you do me the honor of going out with me?"

"ummmm" was Harry's brilliant response till he got a nudge from Hermioen who was beaming with approval. The hall was silent yet. He looked around every body waited for him to answer, even Ron had stopped eating. He did not need more proof, of Malfoy's sincerity, did he?


A smile broke out on Draco's serious face. And he heaved a great sigh of relief.

"There are conditions." Harry chided.


"Lay off Hermione. Lay off idiotic Gryffindor jokes. Lay off stupid Slytherin qualities. Lay off aristocracy around me. Lay off any and every thing that proves that you are a snobbish git."

"You will not find fault with me, Harry. After all I just pledged myself to me."

"Yes fine. By the way you didn't really need to make such a show of things."

"You won't listen o me any other way."

"You did not sound very serious." Harry scooted to side as Draco wedge between him and Neville carefully avoiding Hermione.

"Yeah. You just don't jump from being a blood thirsty enemy to a devout lover. It's not easy. So… what are you doing this Friday?"

"nothing." He tried not to notice as Draco took his hand.

"What do you say to going to a date with me?"

"Alright. Where?"

"That will be a surprise." Draco grinned.

He watched interested as Harry smirked to himself. How he had said he loved surprises.

"Oh and Harry?"


"I would like you to call me by my given name." he said nonchalantly keeping one hand around Harry's and helping himself to pumpkin juice with the other.

Harry chuckled and gave his hand a squeeze.

"I hate you Draco."

Draco watched mesmerized by those brilliant green eyes. "So do I Harry, so do I."

Harry kept chuckling. He had a good feeling about this turn of strange but not completely unfortunate events. His gut feeling said it was good. And he had long decided to trust his gut than his head. He smirked again into his plate and squeezed the hand tighter.

hey there how do you like it? please please please review. . .