Summary: America had seen some pretty weird stuff in his lifetime: an alien, a satanic-sounding whale, France almost nude, ect. But nothing would have, COULD have, prepared him for the sight before him. Maybe all the burgers were starting to get to his head...

Pairing: UKxUSxUK, GerIta, some others i haven't decided yet.

Warning: Yaoi, Shounen-ai, language


America was pretty sure he didn't deserve this. He knew he's done some things in the past that he regrets but was sure he didn't do anything to deserve this.

-A Few Hours Before-

"Hey England, you in there?" America rushed into his old guardian's house. He thought of a cool new way to use hamburgers to stop global warming and had to come and tell England about it. He was kind of surprised to not hear a bunch of curses being yelled at him and was beginning to get worried.

It's Saturday, he's usually at his house knitting some crap today...

He nearly jumped as he heard a scream come from England's basement and sprinted down to where he heard the yell come from.

"England! Don't worry, the hero's here to save- what in the hell happened?" America had to take a double-take as he opened the door to where England usually does his weirdo magic crap.

"What does it look like, you bloody idiot?"

"Don't be so harsh to him!"

"Why not, it's his fault this happened!"

"It's just how he is, I doubt he intended to shout and scare us into dropping the potion!"

"Pfft, just cause you're so enamored with the git doesn't mean it's not his fault that this hap-"

"That's enough fighting you two! Someone might get hurt, and i won't allow that in our house!"

"Oh, sorry, mother, didn't realize my yelling was bothering you. Maybe i should call you grandma instead."

"Why you-"

"Enough! Bloody hell, my ears are bleeding just listening to you buffoons dribbling on about nonsense! Now do something useful and get the spellbook to reverse this mess, oh and also someone get the idiot off the floor and into a bed or something."

The three looked to the floor, two of them scrambling to help America while the third laughed at how America had fainted before helping the two.


"Oh...w-where am I?" America groaned as he sat up in the bed. He looked around and recognized it was England's room. He also saw England at the foot of the bed and sighed in relief.

"Well look who finally came back to life." America looked at England, well he looked like England but there was something definitely off about the man. For one, his accent was different. It was more cockney and his voice was more gruff.

"England...?" America asked cautiously as he got out of the bed. He blushed when he realized he was changed out of his pants and shirt and was now only in boxers and a shirt.

"Who the bloody else were you expecting, Santa?" England said spitefully and scowled at America.

"Jeez, what the hell crawled up your ass and died!" America yelled at England and was about to walk up to the man when he started walking towards America. He gulped and backed up as he strided towards him, a dark aura engulfing the man as he narrowed his eyes. He grabbed America by the colar and shoved him against the wall before bringing his face uncomfortably close to his.

"If I were you I'd pipe down, poppet." His green eyes were dark, menacing, and almost enticing-

No, what the hell am I thinking!

"W-who are you and what have you done with England?" America was actually scared at the moment. He knew this guy wasn't the England he knew. He knew England could be dangerous when he wanted to be, but this man simply radiated danger, edge, and rebellion.

"Who do you think, poppet?" The man licked America's cheek slowly before nibbling on his ear. America had to surpress a shiver and bit his lip to surpress a moan. He was beyond confused at this point. First, he goes to England's house and then probably fell asleep or something 'cus he couldv'e sworn he had this weird-ass dream where there were four Englands, and now some guy who was pretending to be England insults him as soon as he wakes up starts molesting him a few seconds later!


"Not a chance..." This England doppleganger started to nibble on his neck, leaving a red mark in a couple of places and licking his way up America's strong jaw. He stops right before his lips and his breath ghosts over it. America can only stare into vibrant green eyes and can't help but feel bothered at the fact that he's not as disturbed by this as he should be.

He looks like the guy who used to raise me for God's sake! Why arn't I disturbed by this that much...

When he thought about it the only thing that really bothered him with the situation at hand was that a complete stranger was about to kiss him.

But if it was England...

America, to his relief, wasn't able to finish his thought as he heard the door behind them open.

"Hey, is he awake ye- WHAT IN THE BLOODY HELL ARE YOU DOING?" America heard an all too familiar British accent and gasped as he saw who was at the doorway.

"What the hell are you doing?" The England at the door dropped the tray he was holding and started to walk to the two of them.

The England holding America against the wall gave him a 'What the hell does it look like I'm doing' face and voiced his expression after.

"'the bloody fuck does it look like I'm doing?"

"Don't use such strong language around him! And I mean," This England was kind of reminding him of Austria right now.

"WHY THE BLOODY HELL ARE YOU DOING IT, SICK BASTARD!" Scary England, as America dubbed it, let go of him and began to walk towards Prissy England.

"I'm not sick, you're head's just too far up your arse that you can't see he's not some little kid anymore." America actually wanted to smile at the comment that Scary England made of how he wasn't a kid, but resisted the urge when he saw Prissy England's facial expression.

"BUT WE STILL RAISED HIM! You can't just go and molest our old charge like he's some sort of toy for you to play with!" Scary England frowned at the comment and folded his arms, the gold bracelets on his arms jingling as he did.

America for the first time actually looked at what the Englands were wearing. Scary England had a white puffed long-sleeved shirt with the neckline going down in a V all he way to the hem of his black, form-fitting pants. He had boots on and they clincked as he walked. Gold chains addorned his wrists and his hair was more ruffled than usual. Prissy England had a frilly pick apron on, much to America's amusement, and was wearing what England used to wear around the house when he visited America when he was younger. Memories panged America's mind and he felt his heart tug a little.

Of course after observing the two did America realize that, yes, there were two Englands.

"W-wait, why are there two of you?"

Scary England looked over disbelievingly at America. "Please tell me you didn't just notice that now?"

"Quit reprimanding him!"

"Make me, you git!"

"Oh bollocks, they're fighting again. Come, help me stop them." Another England, this time in a dark cloak, and a relatively normal looking England entered the room. As the four Englands were fighting America tried to make sense of all of this.

The key word being tried.

"Oh, bloody shit, he's gone and fainted again!"


A/N: I hope you enjoyed it! my first multi-chap fic for Hetalia! pls R&R