Disclaimer: I Do Not Own Naruto
'Am I dead? Has Kami finally gotten bored with ruining my life and decided to kill me now after all this time? About time I guess… That's a bright light… Oh no, please no! Curse you Kami and your awesome abilities of irony!' Naruto thought before he awoke in the hands of the same red head that caused his terror. She was saying something with a frantic tone but Naruto couldn't hear anything but a high pitched whine. A slap to the face brought Naruto out of his moment of confusion and his ability to hear returned.
"Geez, kid, I know I'm a looker but you like literally raised the bar about my looks! Guess what, I'll give you a chance just because you're so cute!" Mei said with a raised eyebrow and flirtatious grin.
Naruto was even more confused, she caused him to faint, slapped him, given him a second chance at life, then called him cute. 'What is she coming at now? This is too troublesome.'
Before anything can continue, however, an ANBU with a boar mask came up to Naruto and grabbed his arm from Mei.
"Uzumaki-san, Hokage-sama needs you at once in the park. Let us go now." Boar spoke until he looked at the tattered forms of Hana, Kurenai, Anko, and Yugao. "We'll get some medic-nin to come and pick them up, now no haste." He finished as he pulled Naruto away.
"I'll find you Uzumaki-koi! Don't you worry about that!" Mei yelled after him as she giggled.
"Boar-san, take me far, far, away please." Naruto said with pure terror evident on his face.
At the park
Sasuke looked around and noticed that there was nobody in the park. Chouji mentioned meeting at the park for news on the case of Kami. There was nobody, as in, no civilians.
Sasuke sat underneath a tree and began to polish his sword while whispering the good deeds of Kami. He heard footsteps, and plenty of them. He looked up and saw the rest of his squad, each had somber expressions. Sakura wasn't looking at him, but at the ground instead, while Naruto had a confused but depressed shine in his eyes. Sasuke didn't like this, he felt odd, maybe sympathetic, or guilty; emotions that he barely started to learn once again.
"Sakura, Naruto, what's the matter? What happened?" Sasuke asked as he rose from his spot and walked closer to his team.
Sakura turned around and slowly began to walk away towards the center of the park. Sasuke was about to ask but got interrupted by Naruto.
"Sasuke, follow us please." His voice was dead serious, the complete opposite of his cheerful self. Sasuke followed slowly with a concerned look on his face while trying to think of a reason on why his teammates were acting strange.
The walk was slow but the tension more than made up for it; it was slightly hard to breathe without causing either of them to flinch, which unnerved him even more. Then he noticed something about Naruto.
His hair was braided.
He stifled a laugh, which caused Naruto to turn around with a sadden look that said "Don't ask".
Once they managed to get to the center of the park, they remained quiet for what seemed to be ages, until he finally said something.
"Ok, what's the matter with you two? You're freaking me out; you haven't said anything in over 30 minutes!" Sasuke didn't scream or yell but he talked angrily before turning to Naruto.
"And you! Don't get me started with you… you, hair-braided, emotionally dysfunctional lunatic!" Sasuke was trying to make conversation the only way he knew how, insults.
Instead of a comeback, however, he heard laughter coming from the both of them. They seemed to lighten up after his 'rant' and that made Sasuke smile slightly.
"Sorry, Sasuke-kun, but hearing that, from you?-! What a hypocrite!" Sakura managed to blurt out before falling on her knees along with Naruto as they tried to catch their breath.
'I try to make humor and they tell me off… That's cool… huh.' Sasuke thought as his smile remained on his face.
They stopped laughing after several minutes and went back into their serious forms. They looked at Sasuke and sat down.
"Sasuke we're sorry, we've known you for so long and yet we didn't notice this big dramatic change of yours." Naruto began while he removed a scroll from underneath his jacket.
"E-Excuse me, but what are you talking about?-!" Sasuke erupted with confusion.
"You see, if we had known, we could have helped you with… your little problem." Sakura finished while she looked around as she tried to avoid his gaze.
"Sasuke this isn't something to be ashamed of, but it's just not right! You should've just said you needed help not going to these lengths just to get attention! Isn't that right Sakura?"
"Wait… What… Help?-! Just what is going on here with you two?-!" Sasuke yelled in irritation.
Naruto and Sakura looked at each other and nodded.
"This is your intervention Sasuke." They both spoke simultaneously.
Sasuke gaped at his friends and began to back away until he bumped into somebody. He turned and saw Shino Aburame blocking his path, with the same scroll that Naruto had. He heard more footsteps and saw the serious faces of the other rookie 9 and Team Gai holding the same scroll.
They circled Sasuke and began to unravel the scroll which showed several seals. The seals glowed as they approached the target.
Shino was the first; he struck the opened scroll on Sasuke's back. He yelled in pain as he kicked Shino away. The kick left him wide open as both Neji and Tenten struck him on the arms with the scrolls. The pain was unbearable and he fell to the floor. One by one the rest of the rookie 9 attached the scrolls until they finished.
Sasuke rose to his feet slowly and began to wobble around away from his "comrades" until he saw a familiar face.
"Et tu Chouji?" Sasuke said with a downcast look as Chouji opened the scroll.
"Forgive me Sasuke-kun." was the last thing Chouji said before he struck the scroll onto Sasuke's chest.
Sasuke fell onto his knees as he tried to regain his breath, he looked around and saw the faces of his attackers, and they looked horrible, 'They were forced to do it…' Sasuke realized before he fell face first. From the ground he could see the look on Chouji, he took it harder than anyone else and that comforted Sasuke. 'It wasn't betrayal, it was an order!'
Sasuke spoke between coughs. "I… I understand… I don't hold… this against you, Chouji…" He stayed on the floor, the only noise that could be heard were his coughs.
Naruto wanted to help him up but got interrupted by Sakura. "Let's give him some space; he may be angry with us." With that said every genin present left Sasuke alone in the park.
'Kami-sama, is this another trial of yours? Wait… I can't feel you anymore! The seals are repressing my will to believe… No!' Sasuke inwardly screamed. He could feel the seals on his body begin to burn when he thought of Kami. Kami has helped him so much since he began to fully believe, this was certainly a trail, one that he will not fail.
'I'll find a way to believe again Kami-sama. I know I will.'
Naruto sighed, that was the hardest thing he ever had to do. But it was necessary, if they didn't do it, the Hokage and the Interrogation and Torture department would have. If the Hokage was bluffing, Naruto couldn't tell. He was alone once he left the park; he was near the Hokage's tower when he felt some hands on his back nearing around his neck. He figured it was either a psychopath out in a killing spree who found his new victim, or Kushina. He really didn't know who he preferred, it was a tough call.
"I told you I'd find you, Uzumaki-koi…"
Naruto gasped sharply and began to tremble, but remembered the lesson he learned with Yugito, give everyone a chance. But then again, he didn't even know her and she was already calling him "lover".
"My name is Naruto, and yours would be Ms?" Naruto asked as he gulped the urge to scream.
She giggled and put her mouth on the back of his neck just so he can feel her breath. "Whatever you want it to be, Naru-koi…" Then she giggled again.
Naruto face palmed and wondered why he always met perverts; he figured it gave some greater being the satisfaction of watching his life hit the fan, but stopped thinking like that before he resembled Kakashi with his book.
"Uh… Right, do I know you?" Naruto asked as he felt blood rush to his face. 'She's like a second Kushina-chan!'
Mei was having a good time; this kid was lining her up with chances for a flirt with every sentence. 'He may be young, but he must know his way around women… I'll stick around him for a bit…' She thought as she giggled. "Would you like to know me?"
Said the spider to the fly.
Naruto sighed with relief, 'Whew, at least she wants to talk instead of interrogating!' He thought with new confidence. "Hey I know, let's get to know each other somewhere more private!" Naruto said as he began to carry her towards "somewhere private".
'Wow! He really has been around! I wonder how big… Ichiraku's Ramen 'n' Dango Stand?' Mei's thoughts were interrupted as she spotted the food stand in all its glory. Naruto seated her before claiming his rightful stool. Naruto turned and had an expecting expression.
"I need to know something first… Do you hate ramen?" Naruto nearly growled as he remembered how his new friends doubted the power that is ramen. But it was ok; he turned them in the right way and made them love the goodness.
"Pfft! Who could hate ramen?-! Best food ever made from Kami-sama herself!" Mei yelled with a fist in the air.
Naruto could have cried.
Hana, Yugao, Kurenai, and Anko all shared a room in the hospital, which was common for ninja, and they all groaned; the free for all against each other with the Kumo ninja and civilian. The red head really put a hurt on them, which was really strange. She easily overpowered them all with killing intent and strikes that hurt really bad. But then they both disappeared right before help could arrive!
"Well I feel like crap, we completely underestimated them. I'm itching for some payback! Wait never mind, that's just my nose." Hana complained as she desperately attempted to force her restrained arms towards her face.
The others just mumbled in agreement.
"What's a Kumo ninja doing in Konoha anyway? They have just about everything we do, I heard they even have their… own… Jinchuriki…" Yugao trailed off when she realized the possibilities.
"SHE'S AFTER NARUTO!" All of the kunoichi screamed as they broke from their restraints and jumped through the window.
Had they stayed a little longer, they would have seen a kunoichi enter the room and inspect it closely. The woman cracked her knuckles before disappearing in a swirl of ice. The last thing that was heard in that room was "Uzuki… Yugao…"
Two pairs of eyes narrowed as they saw Naruto talking to some strange red headed woman. It seemed as Naruto had taking a huge liking towards the woman within a few seconds of bringing her to his favorite stand.
'Naruto doesn't like her like that, right? I'm going up there!' Kushina thought with new-found determination.
'What are she going to do now?-! We almost got caught because of her and her stupid pride! Oh, but Naruto shouldn't be talking to her! We have so much in common! I'll kill her! And I'll almost kill Naruto and heal him just so he can see how much I care for him!' Yugito thought as she walked along with Kushina towards the food stand.
Naruto was getting to know Mei and was actually learning a lot, whenever she wasn't making a comment on his body or how adorable he is. She also loved ramen! Maybe not as much as himself, but she truly respected the food, and that was good enough for Naruto. He was so into the conversation that he didn't even notice Kushina and Yugito make their way right next to him. He didn't notice the warning signs that Mei was giving with her eyes as the women sat next to him. He somehow noticed the boiling ramen and the raise in humidity and figured out something.
Kushina really doesn't like to get ignored, especially if he was involved.
He turned around and saw that Yugito had the same look on her face as Kushina did, one of pure anger that pierced the skin and made blood boil with fear. They were staring through him and focusing on Mei! Naruto needed a distraction and he needed one fast!
Almost by cue, the stand had new visitors, sure they were covered with bruises, medical equipment, and casts, but hey, Naruto used what he could get.
That is, until he realized that it was Hana, Kurenai, Yugao, and Anko. That's when everything went tense, nobody made a move, nobody made a noise, nobody breathed, and nobody got hurt… Yet.
Mei, who realized the tension but didn't care much for it, merely shrugged and scooted next to Naruto. "Naruto-koi, who are these old-timers?"
That's when all hell broke loose on the food stand, with Naruto right in the center of it all. He closed his eyes and once again waited for his pain threshold to burst. When nothing came he slowly opened his eyes to see Mei, along with the rest of his older friends in battle stances, with a feral look on all of them. The problem was that they were all literally frozen in place, and Naruto immediately perked up as he felt a gentle hand rest on his shoulder.
"You're back, Haku-chan! How was your time with Jiji?" Naruto said with a nostalgic tone. It felt like weeks had passed since he last saw her, and he almost forgot something about her.
"It was… pleasant Naruto-sama, it's nice to see you too." Haku stressed the word "nice" as if trying to point something out, but Naruto, being Naruto, completely missed it.
Instead, Naruto deadpanned as he heard that honorific once again. "P-please Haku-chan, drop the 'sama' from my name, it sounds… perverted... Haku-chan?" Naruto pleaded until he noticed that Haku began to walk towards the group of frozen women, particularly a purple haired ANBU.
Haku's face held a venomous grin as she saw the target she had been looking for, one Yugao Uzuki, frozen in place, ready for the killing. Oh, how much Haku detested killing other people, but it was for her masters' well being. And maybe just a little for her cause, just a little. Haku was remembered how Zabuza killed, within his mist, his victims died without even knowing how, Haku, surprisingly felt that a death would be better off known. To be able to see the face of your would-be killer, right before you die, made the kill somewhat enjoyable.
Years with a cold-blooded murderer who killed for money can do that to a person, especially, if they spent most of their childhood with said cold-blooded murderer.
Haku moved her hand right over Yugao and made the ice melt down to her neck. The results were instantaneous; Yugao gasped for breath as she looked at the face of perhaps, the palest woman she had ever seen holding a senbon with her right hand and began to inch it closer to her throat. Yugao gasped as the ice around her proved to be too strong for her struggles, she felt like powerless, useless, the woman before her was torturing her as she took her sweet time with the senbon.
Yugao's horrific torture was ended quickly as Naruto spoke with an amused tone "Uh, Haku-chan, I don't think that's a proper tool for freeing them, let's try prying them out first." Naruto made several clones and each began to free the frozen kunoichi.
Haku's eye twitched before smiling sweetly once again. "Of course Naruto-sama, please forgive me, I wasn't thinking… properly." Haku began as she turned to face Yugao and began to melt the ice that surrounded her, before she got to the legs; however, she used her index finger to draw a line across her throat and then continued with the unfreezing.
Yugao was terrified of the pale woman in front of her, but then got mad. 'She said "Naruto-sama" who is this woman, and I owe you one Naruto-kun.' Yugao ought as she stretched her body.
One by one the kunoichi got freed from the ice from Naruto clones, except for Kushina, who quote "unfroze myself thanks to my hot body!" unquote, everyone, including the people inside the food stand, sweat-dropped at her ego. Naruto decided that this moment of peace should be taken advantage of.
"Anybody here want some ramen and or dango?-!" He asked as he laughed nervously. The women nodded as they forgot all of their hatred for each other and sat next Naruto inside the stand. They were gulfing down bowls after bowls, and sticks after sticks of dango with such enthusiasm they forgot about Yugito and Kushina, well except for Kurenai. She eyed them both along with that new woman, Haku. She had stayed right next to Naruto since they were unfrozen and beneath those sweet smiles there were daggers of pure hatred and killing intent. She just had to know about her.
"Naruto-kun, who's uh, who's your friend there?" Kurenai asked nervously, which caused the temperature to drop by a few degrees.
Haku put a hand on Naruto's shoulders with a soothing grip and waited for her masters' answer. Naruto smirked and decided to embark some payback for getting teased with that damn honorific. "Evil beware, she's mean, fast and deadly with the knowledge of frozen water! She'll freeze you where you stand and give your future grandchildren colds! She's Ice Cube, the coolest spandex wearing superh- ack!" Naruto's proclamation was cut short as Haku nearly tore off his arm. She was embarrassed as every single person looked at her with confused/amused looks. Her embarrassment increased as she noticed that Yugao had lost all fear of her and was guffawing with the other kunoichi.
Naruto could almost hear his arm tearing apart from its socket and decided to give an actual answer. "Ahh! T-this is H-Haku-chan, and she's in the process of tearing my arm off!" He yelled with pain as Haku relaxed her grip on his poor arm.
The others simply nodded as they restrained from their laughter. Kushina smiled smugly as she decided she wanted to cause some trouble. "And, where is she going to stay Naruto-kun, if you don't mind me asking?" Everything went quiet as everyone wanted to know the answer.
"Well, with me I guess, it's going to be hard though. With you already sleeping with me, along with Yugito, we'll find a way…" Naruto spoke without thinking along with an odd smile on his face.
"Excuse me for a moment…" Hana, Kurenai, Yugao, Anko, and surprisingly Mei spoke simultaneously before they disappeared in a cloud of smoke. In the distance one could hear the sounds of mass construction happening. Haku, Kushina, Yugito, and Naruto just stared at each other in awkward silence before the women arrived, covered in sweat while wearing construction helmets.
They held blueprints, huge blueprints. They held them wide open and smiled.
"We present, the Uzumaki Mansion."
A/N: Sorry for the late update, summer band started at my school and I barely have any time for, well just about anything… Oh! What's this, I broke a hundred reviews! That's great guys! What I did notice, was that I got a lot of favorites and no reviews, that causes for me to seem just a little… underrated and sad.. So… yeah… Please review guys it does help! Shout-out to Ihateheroes, you're a badass author with awesome stories! Keep doing what you're doing dude!