A/N This is…I don't know what this is LOL. It's partly me trying to get over my writers block and partly because of ION showing L.D.S.K. a couple of nights ago and the ER scene where Hotch berates and kicks Reid making me wonder how bad Hotch would break on Reid if properly motivated and my bff insisting the only thing that would push Aaron that close to the edge would have to be Jack related. So…the plot bunnies invaded, ate some shrooms and thus this fic was born. This was supposed to be a one shot but blah, I seem incapable of writing one these days. The title is from Erykah Badu's Window Seat. I heard it and thought of Spence…
Warnings: Some OOC moments, language, rough sex, violence. Proceed with caution if domestic violence may be triggering for you.
Spoilers: Alludes to events in 100
Chapter One: I Bruise Easily
"God damn it Spencer how could you be so stupid?" Aaron Hotchner hissed, his face the picture of pure fury. Aaron stormed into the kitchen, and even though he was clad in his pajama bottoms, a white t-shirt and his slippers he looked every bit as imposing as he did when in one of his designer suits. His dark brown eyes had deepened to an almost stormy black and were spitting fury at his slightly terrified, completely contrite lover. His voice was hard edged, accusatory and biting, with just a tiny hint of fear creeping in at the edges and a hell of a lot of anger infusing his tone. "You," he said with barely controlled rage, "are supposed to be a god damn genius. So how exactly is it that you can't keep an eye on one small boy for five minutes while I get dressed?"
"I...I...it was an acci-"
"Don't." Curt. Short. Icy. Aaron cut across Spencer's protest swiftly and with laser-like precision. "I don't want to hear your excuses. I don't want to hear your explanations. I left you alone for five fucking minutes and you can't even manage to not let my son get hurt. Jesus Christ Spencer how could you be so irresponsible?"
"I only went to-"
"You left him alone?What the fuck is wrong with you? God Spencer, I know that you're socially retarded and don't have a lot of experience with children, but even you should be able to piece together that you don't leave a small child unattended by a hot stove. Were you trying to hurt him?" Somewhere in the recesses of his brain Aaron knew he was dangerously close to saying or doing something he couldn't take back, but he couldn't bring himself to calm down enough to care. All he knew, all he cared about, was that his son was nursing a badly burned hand and he'd gotten it on Spencer's watch.
Spencer paled. "Of course not!" He fired back. "How could you think I would ever…I stepped out of the room for two minutes to answer the door, Aaron. I didn't think-"
"Oh you didn't think?" Aaron pounced. "You're always thinking Spencer and yet the one time it might actually do some good, you conveniently didn't think."
Spencer felt horribly guilty about Jack's injury and he knew that it was his fault, but he didn't think Aaron was being entirely fair. "Aaron, I understand that you're upset and I understand-"
"You don't understand a damn thing!" Aaron broke in hotly. "My son is upstairs nursing possible third burns due to your negligence-"
"Now you're just being ridiculous! If he had third degree burns he'd require medical attention." Spencer interrupted. He was sick with guilt, devastated by Aaron's words and frustrated at not being given the opportunity to at least explain what happened and he spoke without thinking.
Quick as a flash Aaron had grabbed Spencer and slammed him up against the kitchen cabinets. "I'm being ridiculous?" He ground out between clenched teeth. He had a bruising grip on Spencer's upper arms. "You hurt my kid and now you have the unmitigated gall to tell me I'm being ridiculous?" Aaron questioned menacingly.
"N-No. I didn't hurt Jack! I would never hurt Jack! I didn't mean for him to get burned, I told him to stay-"
Aaron's grip tightened and Spencer felt himself being shaken violently. "Don't you dareblame this on him!" Aaron fumed.
Spencer felt panic and bile rise up in the back of his throat. He felt trapped and helpless. The look in Aaron's eye made him flash back to when they had been held hostage by Phillip Dowd and Aaron had thrown him to the ground and kicked him. He briefly wondered if his lover was about to assault him. "I- I d-d-didn't mean it l-like that. I-I just m-meant that-"Spencer began to stutter.
"Shut up!" Aaron barked, letting Spencer go so suddenly that Spencer stumbled back and his head and shoulders connected with the cabinets and there was a loud clattering as dishes fell to the ground. The noise startled Jack, who woke from his spot on the couch where Aaron had settled him after the accident, and began to cry. "Son of a bitch." Aaron swore.
"Make yourself useful and clean up the mess, and then get the hell out." Aaron threw over his shoulder as he scooped Jack up and made his way up the stairs to Jack's bedroom.
Spencer bit his lip. Don't think, don't feel, don't break. He moved on autopilot, sweeping up the broken dishes and finding new places to put the rest. How could you be so stupid? You ruined it. He hates you now; he thinks you hurt Jack on purpose. His son. He'd called Jack his son, not their son as he'd been doing for the past few months. Spencer fought back tears. Aaron didn't think of Spencer as any kind of parent for Jack. Aaron had told him to get out and that's what he was going to do. It was the least he could do. Spencer paused as he realized he wasn't dressed and his phone, wallet and car keys were on Aaron's bedside table. He decided he'd walk…there was a metro stop a couple of miles away and he didn't want to chance going up the stairs to get dressed or get his car keys. He'd have to see Aaron, and Spencer didn't think he could take another round of recriminations so he just pulled his coat on over his pajamas, grabbed his messenger bag from the hallway and slipped out the door.
"There, there buddy. It's ok. I know that was a really loud noise but it was just daddy and papa being clumsy. Nothing to be afraid of." Aaron rubbed small circles in Jack's back, soothing him.
"Daddy," Jack turned his tearstained face up to look at his father, "is papa mad at me?"
Aaron felt his chest tighten and he balled his hands into fists. Damn you Spencer Reidhe thought bitterly. He forced his temper down and smiled at Jack. "Of course he isn't. Why would papa be mad at you?" Aaron replied.
"Because when the doorbell runged he tole me he was gunna get tha door an ta stay in my seat an away from tha stove." Jack whispered. "I know not ta touch tha hot, but I wanted ta help Papa. He said he was makin you a speshul breakfist." Jack quietly confessed.
Aaron felt as if he had just been left dangling over the edge of a cliff. "Papa told you to stay in your seat?" He asked quietly
Jack nodded sleepily. "He said he'd be fast an then I could help crack eggs, but I wanted ta help wit tha toast." Jack explained. "I was tryin ta give Papa a surprise too."
Aaron closed his eyes against the wave of nausea that was threatening to overtake him. Spencer had tried to explain and Aaron had just shouted him down. "Buddy…you know that the stove isn't a toy and that when Papa tells you something you have to listen." He gently admonished Jack.
"I know Daddy. I'm sorry." Jack said. "Are you sure Papa isn't mad?" Jack asked again.
"I'm sure buddy. Why don't you take a nap now?" Aaron said, brushing his son's hair back from his forehead and kissing him. Papa isn't mad at you but he's most likely furious with me. Aaron thought to himself as he watched Jack drift back off to sleep. He winced as he remembered the way he'd gone after Spencer, the way he'd grabbed him, the hurt in Spencer's eyes and damn it,the fear, the stutter that only appeared when Spencer was absolutely terrified or utterly embarrassed, and then there were the things he'd said-
Make yourself useful and clean up the mess, and then get the hell out."Oh god, no." Aaron whispered as he remembered the furious words he'd tossed over his shoulder. He rose and quickly made his way down the stairs. Please don't be gone, please don't be gone, he mentally chanted as he rounded the corner. His heart sank when he saw that Spencer had indeed cleaned up the mess, and was nowhere to be found. "He can't have left; I didn't hear him come up the stairs." Aaron muttered to himself. "His keys are on the bedside table, he would have had to walk right past me." Aaron rushed back up the stairs and checked the bedroom. Sure enough, Spencer's car keys, ID and credentials were on the bedside table where he'd left them the night before. Aaron cringed when he realized that Spencer hadn't even been dressed.
Aaron sighed and sat down on the edge of the bed. He grabbed his phone and dialed Spencer's number. Immediately there was a buzzing on the floor beside the bed. Aaron felt himself going into a full blown panic as he realized that Spencer was wandering the streets of Virginia with no money, no phone, no identification and half dressed. He debated half a second then started making calls.