Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto…nor do I own Resentment by Beyoncé
She looked absolutely beautiful to the point where she seemed to be glowing. She was wearing a flowing, black, strapless gown that somehow enhanced her pale skin. Her blue hair ran down her shoulders in curls and on her neck was a silver choker, a gift from her beloved.
She bit her bottom lip nervously as she turned to him. He looked absolutely stunning as always. He was dressed in black dress pants and an orange button down shirt. His golden blonde hair was as spiky and wild as the day she first met him.
She loved his hair just as much as she loved those deep blue eyes; especially when they focused intently on her.
But at the moment, those wonderful eyes were focused on everything but her, almost as if he was looking for something…or someone.
She sighed inaudibly as she grabbed an ice water from the waitress' tray. This was supposed to be one her finest moments. She had come so far and was rewarded with a great job, awesome friends, and an amazing boyfriend.
Hyuuga Hinata sighed again and took a sip out of her glass. She looked up at Naruto only to find he disappeared. Looking around, she found him talking to Haruno Sakura, his friend from high school. 'Well, he found what he was looking for,' she thought, watching him laugh and smile as if he hadn't seen her in years. But Hinata knew better. The bluenette just shook her head and began walking around making sure that at least everyone else was having a good time.
Six years. That's how long they've been together. Those were the best years of her life. She cherished every moment she spent with Naruto, whether good or bad. He was the love of her life. He was her everything.
This party was to celebrate their anniversary and she put it all together as a gift. She did all of this to show how much she loved him…and he seemed to be enjoying it…with Sakura. 'But it's going to be okay.' Hinata smiled as she thought of her surprise for the evening. She was going to express exactly how she was feeling.
A couple hours later, Hinata was sitting on the plush couches provided; resting her sore feet. Her curls had fallen slightly, but she still looked gorgeous. The bluenette had given up looking for her boyfriend a while ago; it didn't even matter anymore.
A warm hand settled on her shoulder, startling her before she recognized the face. "Oh, Gaara-kun, you scared me."
Gaara looked her over before replying, "I apologize, Hinata-chan. That was not my intention."
Hinata smiled softly and shook her head. "It's alright. So, are you enjoying the party?"
"Are you?" he questioned, his eyes focused on her intently. The young beauty lowered her eyes, her smile faltering. Slender hands gently caressed her cheek and pushed her hair behind her ear. "I apologize, once again; I did not mean to make you cry," his voice was monotone, but aquamarine eyes held slight concern for his friend.
She laughed sadly, blinking back tears, "No, it's okay, really." The red-head looked at her skeptically. "I'm serious. I'm not crying; I'm just a little sad. I can be a little sad, right?"
Gaara nodded. Hinata gave him a hug causing him to tense before relaxing. He still wasn't used the physical contact that she initiated, even after a year of being her friend. He awkwardly rubbed her back and then released her. Hinata gave a real smile, laughing a little. "I want to thank you, Gaara-kun. You have been a really good friend to me this past year. I-I think it would have been very difficult w-without you."
Gaara shifted uncomfortably; he wasn't a very emotional person. "It is no problem, Hinata-chan. You have been a very good friend as well. I will…miss you when I travel back to my homeland."
Hinata bit her lip at his statement before her eyes filled with determination. "I was going to tell you after the party, but I guess there's no time like the present. Do you remember when you offered me a job in your department back in Suna?"
"Yes and the offer will stand until I return."
Gaara furrowed his brow, the only hint to his confusion. "Are you sure, Hinata-chan? You should not accept this out of spite or anger, especially -," he paused when Hinata held up her hand to interrupt.
"I want this," she said, pausing at the sincere ring in her tone. She smiled calmly. "I want this," she repeated. The bluenette grabbed her friend's hand. "Don't get me wrong, I love my friends, and my family and I will miss them, but I need to start focusing on me. I enjoy my job, but you have given me a chance to do something that I love; something that I thought I lost my passion for." She squeezed his hands tighter.
"I know that it's going to be difficult, but I need to try," her voice ended in a whisper. "It's going to be hard these next few months and I know I won't be able to get through them if I stay here. I just want to start over and who knows? Maybe I'll come back and visit.
"I've thought about it, ever since you told me four months ago. I went through the pros and the cons and the benefits outweigh the cost."
Gaara, who stayed silent throughout her small speech, nodded in acceptance. Hinata beamed at the approval and squeezed his large hand, once more, before letting go.
"There is two months to completely think about the offer; though having known you for about a year, once you set your mind to something, you see it through," he said wryly. His aquamarine eyes narrowed on her, his expression becoming serious, "I want you know that you will not be alone; if you anything at all, know that you can call me."
Hinata, blushing lightly at the intense focus, nodded her head while smiling. "Thank you, Gaara-kun." The red-head simply nodded his head in acknowledgement.
She looked around and finally spotted her boyfriend. His blonde was laughing and joking with their friends. No one noticed the slight brushes, but she did. She turned back to her companion to find him staring at the scene in front of him.
The petite bluenette grabbed his arm lightly causing him to swing his head toward her. "It's okay, Gaara-kun," she said softly and gave him a true smile, "I will be okay."
Gaara seemed to hesitate but bobbed his head in understanding. His head turned slightly to the right where people were setting up the stage for live performance; courtesy of Hinata. "I will come and get you in ten minutes," he proclaimed before getting up and losing himself in the crowd.
The young woman drew in a deep breath and released it before getting up herself. She made her way over to where some of her closest friends and her beloved were.
"Hey guys," she greeted with a soft, but real, smile plastered to her face. "I hope you are enjoying yourselves." She got a chorus of cheers and agreements making her laugh.
She turned her attention to Naruto, who in turn, looked back, dazzling blue eyes bright. Once upon time, she would have gladly drowned herself in them. "Hey," she smiled.
The blonde gave her a big smile and pulled her in for a brief hug. "There's my girl; I was just about to go look for you."
Hinata just sighed softly before tugging on his arm. "May I speak to you for a moment?" she asked.
"Sure, Tenshi," he replied, waving at his friends. "We'll be back, guys," he smiled and then let Hinata lead him away to a quieter area of the party. Naruto leaned against the wall while Hinata stood in front of him. "What's on your mind, Hina-chan?"
For a moment, she simply stared at him, as if trying to memorize his features. His smile that brightened the gloomiest of days, deep azure eyes that she would willingly drown in if she let herself, and even his tattooed whiskers that he had done on a dare in his college days.
She raised her hand and caressed his whiskered cheek, eyes clouded with memories. "You know that I love you, right?" she asked softly. Naruto's eyes flickered with an emotion, too quick for her to process, before it was gone.
"Yeah, I love you too," he said. Hinata lips trembled slightly. She opened her mouth, "I wanted to tell you that -."
They both turned towards the source as the person made their way over.
"Hey Hinata-chan!" Sakura greeted cheerily and grabbed Naruto's sleeve. "I was wondering if I could borrow your boyfriend for just a moment."
Naruto looked between the two young women and settled on Hinata. "I'll be right back, Hinata-chan. I promise."
The bluenette looked him right in the eyes. "You shouldn't make promises you cannot keep, Naruto-kun."
"It's okay; I'll speak to you later. I hope you're enjoying the party, Sakura-san." She looked around the pink-haired woman to see Gaara heading in her direction. Turning her attention back towards the lovely couple, she bowed her head, "If you'll excuse me, my friend is waiting for me."
Naruto frowned. "Hinata-chan, wait!"
She paused for a moment before continuing on to her destination. She now knew what emotion flashed in his eyes when she professed her love. Guilt. It was also what she heard in his voice. It was way too late now. She knew he loved her, but that wasn't enough…not anymore.
She finally made it to Gaara who nodded his head towards the stage. "The stage is set. Are you ready?"
The petite woman took a deep breath. "As ready as I'll ever be," she replied honestly.
The crowd hushed into silence when a beautiful blonde woman came onto the stage. She was wearing a one-shouldered black gown that fell down to her ankles and on her right was a slit that went up to her thigh; teasing the men with flashes of pale skin whenever she moved. She adjusted the microphone before speaking.
"Can everyone hear me?" she asked.
"Yes," the crowd responded enthusiastically.
"Alright," she smiled. "Most of you may not know me, but I'm Temari, a friend of Hinata-chan's. She has a special presentation for you all so hope you enjoy."
The crowd applauded as the bluenette shyly made her way to the stage. She gave Temari a quick hug before taking over the microphone. The crowd finally noticed another microphone to the left of Hinata on the stage when Temari stepped in front of it instead of making her way off the stage.
Hinata looked over the crowd for a moment. Taking a look at her friends, she smiled, somewhat sad that her family had made the decision not to show.
"Good evening, everyone. Are you enjoying your night?" She smiled when was greeted with wolf whistles and cheers. "I'm glad," she laughed. "Well, I told you that there was a going to be a live performance and I am here to give it to you."
"Before I start, I just wanted to impart some wonderful news to my dearest friends," she paused as the crowd waited in baited breath. She gave a tinkling laugh and smiled brightly, "I am currently two months pregnant." Her friends burst into applause; the women were crying and laughing while the men were giving Naruto a congratulatory pat on the back. Naruto, for the most part, looked completely stunned. They locked eyes before his mouth split into a wide smile as he joined in with the laughing and cheeriness. The crowd settled down when Hinata opened her mouth.
"Thanks, guys. I will now introduce you to Gaara-kun on the string guitar and Shikamaru-kun on the drums." Gaara nodded politely and took a seat to the right of Hinata. Shikamaru lazily brought up a hand and sat down behind the drum seat. He rolled his chocolate brown eyes when Temari gave him a wink.
"I'm a little nervous so go easy on me." Her response was an encouraging applause. Hinata took in a deep breath and let it out slowly.
"I apologize, Naruto-kun," she whispered low enough so that only the people on the stage understood what she actually said. "This was a song I wrote very recently and I wanted to try it on you guys first, so here goes."
The music began slowly, the tone soft and melancholy. Gaara closed his eyes, becoming lost in the notes. Hinata closed her eyes as well, and it was just her and her sound.
I wish I could believe you
Then I'll be alright
But now everything you told me
Really don't apply
To the way I feel inside
She had always believed him, even when her family didn't. She had defended him, time and time again, her faith was unbreakable. But now, that faith had cracked and shattered to pieces, leaving her weak and exhausted.
Loving you was easy
Once upon a time
But now my suspicions of you
And it's all because you lied
She remembered when they first met in high school. He was the class clown; always goofing around. He always seemed as if he was trying to prove something. She was nice girl. Shy but approachable, sweet, cute, and kind. She wasn't really into the whole dating scene, focusing more on her music and art, but the moment she laid eyes on him, she was caught.
I only give you a hard time
'Cause I can't go on and pretend like
I haven't tried to forget this
But I'm much too full of resentment
They met, once again, in college and they didn't begin dating until their second year. She moved in with him after their second year of dating. Her family didn't approve of it, especially her father, but her love for him gave her the courage to rebel for the first time in twenty years.
Just can't seem to get over
The way you hurt me
Don't know how you gave another
Who didn't mean a thing, no ((mean a thing))
The very thing you gave to me
Two years turned into three; three years turned into four. Four years they had been together and those were the best years of her life. He was sweet, caring, funny, understanding, and so much more. He was her first everything; her first crush, her first kiss, her first lover, her first love. Her father would pressure them with marriage, but she would always say they weren't ready. Her sister and cousin would claim that it had been four years and that he should have proposed already. She would defend her relationship stating that she was perfectly happy with the way things were, but some small part of her mind would wonder why.
I thought I could forgive you
And I know you changed
As much as I wanna trust you
I know it ain't the same ((Ain't the same))
And it's all because you lied
Four blissful years turned into five. She always wondered when things began to spiral down. If she had to pick a spot, she would probably say it was five years into her relationship with her beloved that things seemed to take a turn for the worst. She met Haruno Sakura.
I only give you a hard time (hard time)
'Cause I can't go on and pretend like
I haven't tried to forget this (forget this, ooh)
But I'm much too full of resentment ((I'm much too full of resentment))
She didn't hate Sakura; she still didn't. After all, it took two people and they were all adults. She didn't even know that he and Sakura knew each other, until she introduced them. Sakura had applied as an instructor at her family dojo, and she, being an instructor as well, decided it would be nice to have another female to talk to. Sakura was a nice person, so she didn't mind that her boyfriend and Sakura began spending time with each other. They were old friends and were just getting reacquainted.
I may never understand why
I'm doing the best that I can and I
I tried and I tried to forget this (forget this, ooh)
But I'm much too full of resentment ((you lied))
The first time he did it; it was so petty and so stupid that she just let it go. He began to stay out later and later, but her faith never wavered. He would never do that to me. I trust him and he loves me. So she continued on as if nothing was wrong.
I'll always remember feeling ((you lied))
Like I was no good ((you lied))
Like I couldn't do it for you ((you lied))
Like your mistress could ((ooh yeah))
And it's all because you lied (lied)
There were nights that he didn't even bother to come back to what she once called a home. She would absently muse of how his lies had become even more believable and at one point; she made herself believe them. She started to avoid Sakura, who always seem to come into work, glowing. She knew she was naïve in some things, but she wasn't stupid. Date nights were cancelled, he started 'working' later and later, and when he bothered to come home, he always seemed to be tired.
Loved you more than ever ((you lied))
More than my own life ((you lied))
The best part of me I gave you ((you lied))
It was sacrifice ((sacrifice))
And it's all because you lied
She was hardly ever at her apartment nowadays; only to shower and sleep. What was there to come home to? If he noticed her change in behavior, he never bothered to comment. She became a nightly regular at a small café down the street from her living space. That was where she met Gaara. She felt as if she drowning and Gaara, unintentionally, became her anchor; distracting her from her reality. He was an artist and had come to Konoha on vacation, all the while, looking for inspiration. Gaara never thought he would make a friend.
I only give you a hard time
'Cause I can't go on and pretend like ((I can't go on and pretend like))
I tried and I tried to forget this ((I've tried and I've tried and I've tried))
But I'm too damn full of resentment
Gaara didn't know what drew her to him and he didn't bother to question. She had seemed so lost and after a week of watching, he had decided to approach. It was, at first, difficult due to him not being much of a talker and her wanting to wallow in her self-pity. But once he told her occupation, she became…alive, and their friendship took from there. He never asked anything personal about her life unless she initiated it and she never pried into his business because he seemed like a man who valued his privacy. Months past and they became closer and closer. Soon he knew all about her and vice versa. She even became friends with the sister who had decided to visit him for a couple months. Their wonderful companionship almost made her forget about her current situation. Almost.
I know she was attractive
But I was here first
Been riding with you for six years
Why did I deserve
To be treated this way by you, you
She should have been happy…but she wasn't. Things seemed to be going back to normal. He was becoming more affectionate and loving and he was simply around…like he used to be. It felt like she was suffocating. The past six months, she only saw him when he climbed into their bed at nights and he would usually be gone in the morning. But now the roles changed; she was the one that began to cancel dates and stay out late. Her beloved wasn't silent in his accusations as she was. She felt hurt that he would think she would betray him, but she tucked it away and never said a word.
I know you probably thinking
What's up with me
I've been crying for too long
What did you do to me
I used to be so strong
But now you took my soul
They had been drunk. That was the only explanation to what happened. They had actually gone out to a nice restaurant and by time they got back, they were completely wasted. She had woken up stark naked with a queasy stomach and a major headache. She looked to her left to see him still completely knocked out. She had slipped out of the bed, called Gaara, and went to their café, where she proceeded to bang her head on the table, much to Gaara's amusement. They had sat and talked for hours and that was when he offered her the job in Suna. She had spluttered and told him that she needed to think about it. A week later, she found out about her pregnancy and she truly began thinking about her relationship and where it was leading.
Can't stop crying
Can't stop crying
She was back on stage; the crowd completely mesmerized with her sound. She didn't even realize she was crying. She closed her eyes, once more. She was going to start over with no regret. She inwardly smiled; she was ready for a new beginning. This song was the curtain closing on this stage in her life.
You could have told me
You wasn't happy
I know you didn't wanna hurt me
But look what you done to me now
She knew that he loved her but she also learned that love wasn't enough. Maybe he didn't know how to tell her and instead decided to distance himself. She mentally shook as she tried to defend his actions again. Whatever his reasons, she didn't deserve to be treated the way she did. She knew in her heart and now in her mind that she deserved to be treated better.
I gotta look at her in eyes ((you lied))
And see she's had half of me ((you lied)
How could you lie ((you lied))
She first looked into Naruto's eyes which were filled with anger, hurt, and guilt. Her lavender eyes then locked with bright emerald. She almost smiled when she saw the guilt but no regret.
Naruto wasn't just her love but he was also her friend. Hinata couldn't hate them, him and Sakura, but she wasn't ready to forgive them yet either.
The crowd burst into applause causing her to smile softly. She bowed and made her way off the stage. Gaara greeted her at the steps. He gently wiped the tears from her face with his thumb and gave her rare smile.
"You did wonderful," he stated in his deep voice. "That was a…creative way to end things." Hinata laughed at that statement.
"Thanks, Gaara-kun," she whispered drawing him into a quick hug. He relaxed quicker this time and returned.
The bluenette stiffened in Gaara's embrace before relaxing. She released the red-head and smiled at him, letting him that she was going to be okay. He nodded back before leaving to give them some semblance of privacy. Hinata took another deep breath before turning to face Naruto.
They stayed in silence for a few minutes. Naruto simply did not know what to say and Hinata had said all that she needed to say to him.
"Hinata-chan," his voice broke slightly, "I'm so-."
"Please don't apologize to me, Naruto-kun," Hinata interrupted. She looked up into his sharp blue eyes filled completely with hurt and guilt. He opened his mouth and she held up her hand.
"You didn't mean for this to happen. You love me and you never meant to hurt me. It was a spur of the moment. I'm very tired of lies and of excuses, Naruto-kun." Her beautiful eyes held no malice, but her voice was raw with hurt. "Were you ever going to tell me? I used to think it was something that I did or that maybe I just wasn't good enough, but I've gotten past that stage. It wasn't me; it was you."
Naruto flinched at each statement as if they were punches. He couldn't be mad because she was just stating the truth. He let things spiral completely out of control and now he was about to lose the best thing that ever happened to him. He clenched his fists tightly and closed his eyes, trying to block himself from the pain. He reopened his eyes in surprise when he felt a small hand gently caress his whiskered cheek.
Hinata gave him a sad smile. "I will always love you, but I refuse to put myself through that again. I could never hate you; however, I can't forgive you, at least not now. I was offered a job in Suna and I have accepted it." Naruto's breath hitched at the last sentence.
"What about the baby? You're moving away to keep from him…or her?" His voice was laced with sorrow and a tinge of anger.
Hinata shook her head. "I'm not doing this to spite you, Naruto-kun. I would never think of denying you our child. I am doing this for me. These next few months are going to be difficult and I simply can't be here." With you.
"I'm not leaving forever, but I won't be back for a while. You can visit if you like, though I would prefer until I actually give birth," she said.
"When are you leaving?" he whispered.
"In a couple months. Most of my stuff is actually already packed and I have the money for this month's rent-."
"Keep it." Hinata began to protest but Naruto refused to budge. "Please, for me."
The bluenette finally conceded with great reluctance. They fell into a short silence before Hinata steeled herself and stepped forward. Naruto stood perfectly still as the small woman stood on her toes and placed a soft kiss on his cheek.
She began to walk away, but her last words rang hauntingly in his head, over and over again.
"Goodbye, Naruto-kun and tell Sakura-san I said congratulations on her pregnancy."
AN/ Let me know what you guys think =)...Please **Bright stars in my eyes**
Until next time,