Clary's phone was ringing in her pocket. It took a moment to notice, since she was heavily involved with Jace at the moment. She could feel Jace's lips quirk up against hers. "Do you want to get that?" He asked, managing to remove his mouth from hers for a moment.
"You mean that wasn't you?" She looked confused and hurt, "I thought you were just really happy to see me…" She trailed off, her lips tugging upward. Jace pinched her hip playfully and kissed her cheek. "Not really, no. I've got better things on my mind right now." She replied to his rolling eyes with another kiss.
He smiled and pulled her close again. Then her phone buzzed once, twice, thrice, four more times. He pulled himself up and sat on the edge of the couch, distancing himself just enough so that they weren't touching. "Just answer it."
Clary groaned and reached into her pocket. "Hello?" She answered groggily; she was highly distracted by the fact that Jace was softly caressing her thigh through her jeans.
"Clary?" Luke sounded panicked, "Clary is that you?"
Clary sat up a little straighter. "Luke? What's wrong? Are you okay?"
"Clary, it's time! I'm taking your mother to the hospital right now. Please come, and hurry… I don't think that I should be the only one here. Jocelyn looks like she wants to kill me, right about now." Clary could hear her mother cursing and screaming at Luke. She smiled.
"We'll be right there."
"Where are we going?" Jace asked.
Clary launched herself off of the couch and started ripping around the room, gathering things to take along. In the midst of this whirlwind, she answered, "To the hospital. My mom is in labor right now."
Jace's eyes got very wide.
A few hours later, Clary, Jace and Luke were gathered in the cramped hospital room watching Jocelyn hold her new baby boy. They were dressed ridiculously, draped in hospital gowns, gloves, and hairnets. Clary smirked as she realized that they resembled the aliens from the horror flick Jace had rented for them just the other night. While she looked at her new brother, she took a moment to reflect on the past two and half years.
Luke and Jocelyn had gotten married, and just a few short months later, Jocelyn announced she was pregnant. The first baby had miscarried at the full moon. Luke had thought that the baby was probably more werewolf than Nephilim, but it didn't matter. It had nearly killed Jocelyn. Three months after that, Jocelyn was pregnant again. This time, the baby had been carried to term, and look where they were now- in the hospital, rejoicing over a new life. Of course the Silent Brothers and the Clave would have to examine the baby; never before in history had there been a Shadowhunter and Lycanthrope crossbreed. But that was all in the future. Clary was thinking about the past. Over the past two years, she and Jace had grown even stronger. She lived at the Institute fulltime now, with him and the Lightwoods. At first, she'd had her own room, but eventually Jace insisted that she move in with him. So that's where they were now, sharing a room and so much more. They had talked about marriage, but they both agreed that at ages eighteen and twenty, they were too young. Both sets of their respective parents had gotten married at a young age and look at what had happened there. She still shuddered a little, thinking of the ordeal that had happened. She was still haunted by memories of Valentine and Sebastian.
When she felt Jace's hand rubbing soft circles on her back, she turned to him and pressed her warm lips against his cool cheek and smiled at him. When he smiled back, she felt like she was floating.
"Well, mom?" She asked in utter anticipation
"Kale," Jocelyn answered, smiling to herself.
"Kale?" Clary repeated, "Why Kale?"
Luke answered this time. "Kale literally means 'man,' and that's what he is. He is going to be a man, not a Downworlder crossbreed or a tainted Shadowhunter. He is going to be a man." Luke looked at his son in amazement, running his hand over Kale's head, stroking the almost nonexistent fuzz of hair that was there.
"Kale," both Jocelyn and Clary repeated the name at the same time and smiled at each other.
"Do you want to hold him, Clary?" Jocelyn asked softly.
"I don't know…" Clary trailed off, hesitating, "He's so tiny… It kinda freaks me out, actually." She trailed off again. Jocelyn held Kale out to her.
"Just take him. Meet your new brother." Jocelyn smiled again as Clary took him, carefully holding him just how her mother had. Jocelyn settled back into the pillows and drifted into sleep, physically and emotionally exhausted after the day's events.
Clary looked down into the face of her brother. He looks like Luke, she mused, but he has Mom's eyes. He lifted his precious little hands towards her and yawned, his little pink rosebud mouth opening wide. Clary touched her index finger to Kale's palm and gasped a little when his fingers fisted around her finger. He had little artist's fingers, already long and tapered. Well, as long and tapered as a six-hour-old baby's fingers could be, at any rate.
Jace hooked his chin over Clary's shoulder and looked down inquisitively at the pink baby tightly swaddled in a blanket. The love of his life, his future wife, his whole reason for existence was holding a baby. It almost made him want to be a father in that exact moment. Clary turned her head just a little to look at him. "He's so tiny," he breathed.
"He's a baby." She breathed right back. Then, looking up at Luke, she saw him smirking at her. "What?"
"Nothing, nothing at all." He answered, holding his arms out for his son. Jace and Clary left a few moments after that. Clary stopped at the door to look back into the room and saw Luke looking at his son and sleeping wife with absolute, unconditional, and unrequited love.
In their room that night, Clary snuggled up against Jace's side, and his arm went around her. They had never revealed it to one another, but this was their favorite part of the night. They held on to each other like there was nothing else in the world. Sometimes they kissed, sometimes they did a little more, sometimes they did nothing but hold each other, gently stroking each other's arms or face.
"Clary-" Jace started, but broke off.
"Hmm?" Clary murmured groggily. She was in that netherworld between slumber and consciousness, "What is it? I'm awake."
Jace sighed. He wished he were more eloquent. "In the hospital room, earlier today, when you were holding Kale…" he trailed off, and she prompted him again. "When you were holding Kale, you had this look on your face. Wh- What were you thinking about?" His hands were trailing all over her body.
"Mmmm," she moaned, turning her face into his chest, "that feels so good."
"Seriously, Clarissa, what were you thinking about?" He asked, impatient.
She put her hand to her eyes, and thought about her answer. She winced at the use of her full name, "Well, Jonathan, mostly I was just, I don't know, thinking about love. How much I love you, how much I love Mom and Luke, how much I love Kale, I just- I don't know."
"Really?" He asked, "Because I was kind of thinking about how I'd like to have one."
"One what?" She asked, distractedly.
"A baby. I think I want to have kids, eventually. You know, after we get married."
Clary propped herself up on her elbow to look at him. She cocked her head to one side and stared wonderingly at his beautiful golden eyes. "I was kind of thinking the same thing, Jace," she murmured back.
For six months, everything was perfect. Then Clary's cell phone rang. She pulled it from her pocket and saw her mother's number splayed across the screen. She flipped it open and starting chattering into it. Then she heard a scream. Jace, sitting next to her, heard it also. She bolted upright and stared at Clary anxiously.
"Clary! You- The baby! - Luke- Help! HELP! Please-" The phone call was riddled with static and panic. Clary screamed and started running, Jace right behind her. She scrabbled for her stele and drew a Portal on the wall. She dove through it, not caring about her own personal safety. The icy feeling of overwhelming panic and dread swept through her, and suddenly she was at Luke and Jocelyn's apartment. The stench of demon was overwhelming. So was the smell of blood and death. Jace was behind, her, dragging her towards the house. Once inside, the first thing she saw was Jocelyn's lifeless body, still clutching her phone. The body was nearly unrecognizable. The clothes were rent to shreds, her body itself was broken, her arms and legs were sticking at awkward angles. Blood was everywhere, still oozing from the many deep cuts and stabs all over Jocelyn's body.
So much blood… Clary thought, sickening herself even more. She turned her head to the side and retched, emptying her stomach. She fell to her knees at her mother's side, weeping uncontrollably. "Jace, Jace where are you?" She called through the hiccupping sobs.
"CLARY! Come here, now!" She heard him scream from the bedroom. She clumsily got up and raced toward him. She paused at the doorway, not wanting to witness another scene like the one she had just come from. "Clary, please! Come here!" He cried out again.
She walked in, holding her breath. In Jace's arms was Luke, badly broken and bleeding, almost a mirror of Jocelyn, but he was still alive. Clary slid on her knees towards him, while telling Jace to get the Silent Brothers. "Hurry!" She screamed after him as he raced to the Portal still open in the front room. She grabbed at Luke, pulling his head into her lap and willing him to stay alive.
"Come on, breath dammit." She muttered. Luke's eyes fluttered open again and his lips formed the question Clary did not want to answer.
"Jocelyn…" He could barely speak.
Clary shook her head.
"No. No." Luke gasped and struggle against Clary, but she held him tighter. Then Luke did something Clary thought was impossible. He started to cry. Then he gasped again, "Kale?" He asked hoarsely. "Where is Kale?"
"In the bassinet, he's fine," Clary answered him through her tears, not knowing if what she said was the truth or not. She didn't care.
"Take care of him…. Cla-" Luke's words broke off in the middle of her name. His breath exhaled from his mouth and he died in Clary's arms. She started screaming, cursing, crying, anything she could do to get rid of the pain. Eventually, she grew quiet, simply holding Luke's stiffening body. "I will find whoever did this to, Luke. I will make them pay for this."
She heard her name called. It was Jace; he crashed into the room and froze when he saw her and Luke. Brother Zachariah was behind him, impassive as ever.
"What-" Jace started.
Clary cut him off. "He's dead. He died when you were gone." Her face still had not changed from the blank stare it held. "Where is Kale?" She asked in a monotone. Jace looked around helplessly.
"I don't, I don't know."
"Check the bassinet. That's what I told Luke."
Kale was sleeping peacefully in his crib, untouched by the horrific events that had taken place only a few moments ago.
Barely a week had passed. The funeral was to take place at the Institute. Clary was still unable to process what had happened. She moved like a robot, slept when she was told to, ate when food was presented. She was dead inside. She could not feel anything. When Mayrse handed Kale to her, she could not hold him. She existed in a comatose existence. It was not until the funeral pyre was lit that Clary showed any emotion. She turned to Jace's shoulder and cried. After the funeral, she locked herself in one of the Institute's many bedrooms and cried until she was spent. After this, she slept for three days. When she woke up, she showered, dressed and ate, then roamed the halls of the Institute looking for the one person she knew could make her feel better. She found Jace in their room, and when she walked in, he sat up straight on the bed and said her name out loud. She said nothing in return; she just walked over and sat next to him before sadly smiling up at him.
"I'm sorry," was all she said. He wrapped his arms around her and murmured in her ear, "You have nothing to be sorry for. Clary, I'm so sorry. I don't know what to say," he continued his embrace, even when he felt a tear drop on his shoulder. She leaned into him, suddenly pressing her lips to his in reckless abandon. She pushed him back on the bed until she was lying on top of him.
"Only mundane apologize for something they didn't do." She reminded him gently. He smiled, but doubts filled his mind. Clary curved her body around his and kissed him again, harder this time. He separated himself from her, pushing her away.
"Clary, you don't want to do this."
"Yes, I do," she retorted, her eyes growing fiery.
"No, you don't." He looked at her sadly before getting up from the bed and softly kissing her forehead. "Go to sleep." He murmured against her soft skin.
"I'm tired of sleeping. I'm tired of walking around like a zombie. I want to feel something! I am sick of everyone looking at me like that!" She screamed at Jace.
He just looked at her sadly as he backed out of the door.
She collapsed crying again, drowning her sorrows in the pillow.
When she awakened the next morning, Clary felt better. She stretched, feeling her joints pop and crack. She twisted underneath the blanket, her hand searched for Jace; then she remembered what had happened last night. She sat and raked her fingers through her hair, removing it from her eyes. She tossed the covers back and got up, pulling her jeans on. Then, out of the corner of her eye, she saw a piece of paper taped to the door. Out of curiosity, she reached for it and took it down. She stared in disbelief at what the note said.
Clary,
I love you so much, and I need you to know that. Please, please, please forgive me for what I am about to do. I am so sorry, but last night proved that you need to be alone for a while. I don't think that I can watch you walk around in anguish. I'm leaving. I won't tell you where; I don't want you to follow me. I will come back, eventually, but right now, we need to be apart. I have never felt as helpless as last night. I think that we both should move on, just for a few years. I'll come back for you eventually. Please forgive me. I love you.
All My Love,
Jace.
Clary's heart broke again.
She went in search of Isabelle, finding her and the rest of the family in the dining room. She wordlessly held the note out to them, each of them read it.
"Where's Kale at?" She asked hesitantly.
"Clary, do you want to talk-"
"No," Clary cut Mayrse off, "No. I just want to see my brother. Jace told me to move on, so that is what I plan on doing."
"Kale is in the room across from yours," Clary could see the pain in Mayrse's eyes; they had grown closer over the past two years. Clary knew that Mayrse cared very deeply about her, "I was just about to go get him."
"I'll go." Clary said with finality, "I'm going to take care of him from now on. I'm not his mother, but," she paused to take a deep breath, "but I'm the only family he has now. Can- can we still live here?" Clary asked, not daring to hope.
"Of course you will." Isabelle retorted, "And we will all help with the baby. He likes me the best, of course, but that just shows he has good taste." Isabelle tossed her long, dark hair over her shoulder proudly before smiling at Clary. "We will anything we can to help you."
Clary's small smile came and went quickly. She turned and walked toward Kale's new nursery. When she arrived, she saw him looking up at her with those expressive dark green eyes, as if to say, "You're not my mom, where is she? Where is my dad?"
"I guess it's just us from now on, kiddo."
Wow… all 2833 words of the first chapter. The basic summary of this story is: Jocelyn and Luke get killed, Jace leaves, and Clary is left caring for her six month old brother. Pretty salty stuff, huh? Anyway, she goes a little crazy, trying to find the demon responsible, and it turns out that this other dude, Beck, is looking for the same demon. They fall in love, but five years later, something happens.
Want to know what happens? Well, it's a secret. Got to read to find out. Muwahahaha….
Note: I know that Downworlders cannot have children, so before you go psycho on me for screwing with Cassie Clare's mythology, listen to this. In Clockwork Angel, when Tessa is reading the Codex and finds out that she allegedly can't have kids, it says that there are no known exceptions. Get this people: LUKE IS AN EXCEPTION! Plus, we all know that Luke is pretty special.
Anyway, I really love reviews. Tell me if you love it, hate it, want to kill me for writing this, et cetera, et cetera. Leave me some love and I will give you a spoiler from the next chapter. Yes, I love reviews so much that I have resorted to bribery.
Also, as you can see, I have changed my penname. It was Stephenie-Meyer-Addicted, but now it is SpeakNow1118.
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