Back to the Future according to the three-year-old daughter of a genius
Disclaimer: I don't own Criminal Minds nor do I own Back to the Future. No copyright infringement is intended.
Fast paced footsteps were the only warning, before someone launched themselves at the FBI's most wanted technical analyst and squealed loudly, "Auntie Penelope!"
The tackled person made sure to put both her laptop and her cup of coffee safely down on the nearest desk, before she looked down to the small girl hugging her legs with a death grip. „Who's that? Are you my little baby G-girl?" she asked all the while looking the little person up and down. "No," she stated, "you're not because my baby G-girl is at least 2 inches smaller."
A frown appeared on said baby G-girl's face before she told her aunt, "I eat vebetagel." She let go of Garcia to make her posture – in her eyes – convincing. Arms akimbo, her left foot tapping the floor and her head held high. She saw her mommy do it whenever she tried to convince her daddy of something so it had to work for her, too.
Garcia suppressed her urge to smile because of her antics and because she knew that she would drive Reid crazy in the years to come. "Oh… keep on eating vegetables and you'll be as big as your uncle Derek," she said.
"You are silly, Auntie," the girl laughed and her brown curls bounced.
Unbeknownst to them Garcia's favourite chocolate God sneaked up to them. "I guess she told you, baby girl." Morgan smirked and in the same breath asked, "What are you doing here, pumpkin?"
He looked around but didn't see Reid in their close proximity.
"I got shot." The little girl proudly showed off her colourful band aid and made her uncle and aunt laugh.
"Sweetie, you got your shots," Garcia corrected kindly. They couldn't have the three-year-old running around at the FBI claiming she got shot. It wouldn't paint a good picture.
But Samantha stubbornly exclaimed, "I said." Garcia and Morgan chuckled. One wouldn't think so by looking at the little girl, but she was a force to be reckoned with, much to the Agent's amusement.
Morgan crouched down to her height. "Did daddy get you a lollypop?" He'd better because there was no doubt in Morgan's mind that the young lady in front of him was on her best behaviour.
"No, we watch Back to the Future!" Both adults looked at the happily bouncing child in front of them.
"Daddy let you watch Back to the Future?" Morgan was the first to recover his equilibrium.
"Yes. It's a super movie." Garcia snickered at that. This kid was going to end up as a Geek. It was too late to try to change her fate, but how, with parents like that, could she escape this fate?
"Really? Tell your uncle Derek what it's about, sweetheart." With this he hoisted her up and made his way over to the bullpen, Garcia hot on their heels. She wouldn't miss this for anything. If Samantha was anything like her father, and that she was, this could be hilarious.
"Well, it's a movie about time travelling," the child started not fazed by the fact that Morgan just sat her on her father's desk in the bullpen. "Sometimes it's difficult to follow, because not all people understand how what happens in a different timeline in the past can change the future if you aren't cautitous," she rambled on, the similarities to her father undeniable.
"First Doc and Marty get in trouble with the Libabians because Doc stole their Pluatonium." She joyfully swung her legs while talking about her seemingly most favourite movie (at least at the moment), not having a care in the world.
"And Doc gets shot, not like I did, but with a real weapon." Her eyes were big when she said this, as if she couldn't believe that somebody could hurt Doc Brown, or anybody, for that matter.
Garcia tried to interrupt to correct her, but she didn't stand a chance against the talk active young Reid.
"I'm not allowed to touch weapons because they are dangerous", Samantha added in a no nonsense voice, as if it should be clear to everybody. Morgan had to suppress his laughter as she stretched the last syllable unbelievably long and nearly missed her continuation. "Marty and Einstein escape in the DeLorean."
When he felt something, or, better, someone tug on his shirt the agent looked down just as Samantha said, "Uncle Derek, I want to have a DeLorean when I'm big."
He felt confused for a moment. Not just because in his opinion nobody in his right mind should want to own a DeLorean. Classic movie car or not. "Why are you telling me this, kiddo?"
"Because daddy said you will say no to every car he wants to buy me." The only thing missing was that she added a 'duh' at the end. Shouldn't it be clear why she told him? Well, she didn't let it faze her and continued, "They drive back to 1955." She paused for a moment, seemingly considering her next sentence. "That's a really long time ago."
Nobody of us is born then. Except maybe Uncle Dave. But daddy says not to tell him I said that." Luckily for them Rossi was nowhere near them.
"So Marty meeted his parents, but they aren't his parents yet and they don't like each other at all", luckily for Samantha Morgan and Garcia both knew the movie, otherwise they would be totally confused right now. Or, better yet, the whole time. "Then Marty goes to school. But he can't say that he's from future, because that would mess with causality. Daddy says that's really bad." Hell, if this kid didn't end outtalking them just like her father did. Which three-year-old could tell you about causality when it couldn't even pronounce some common words? Samantha obviously could.
"50 bucks says she could even explain causality", Morgan whispered while the girl happily chattered on.
"A 100 says she could explain the Theory of relativity in a way I could understand," Garcia countered.
"Marty's daddy shouldn't talk back to Biff. The whole time Biff is really mean to them." After making sure that no one was around who shouldn't hear her next sentence by looking over her shoulder she added in a quieter voice, "He's like Session Chief Stauss", making Garcia and Morgan snort with stifled laughter. Not that they didn't agree with the kid.
Before carrying on she told them not to ever tell Stauss. And Uncle Dave. They had to swear on their physician's honour.
"They use the energy the lighting set free to go back to whenever they live." She paused until she saw Garcia nodding her head, signalling that she understood what Samantha talked about.
"The end is like a cliff hanger. Doc comes and goes to the future with Marty and his girlfriend."
"Daddy said he watched it when he was my age." Just when she started whispering Morgan and Garcia knew that she either was about to say something completely adorable or hilarious (at least in Garcia's and Morgan's opinion) and she didn't disappoint, "But I don't think daddy ever was my age."
Just then they saw said daddy come out of Hotch's office heavily laden with files.
"Reid, couldn't you have let her watch Bambi?" Morgan asked the approaching man. "She's gonna be the only one her age who knows Back to the Future." Reid shook his head. He said it as if it was a bad thing his daughter knew the classics.
"Would it be as much fun for you if she retold Bambi for you?" he said instead of arguing with Morgan about the value of Back to the Future.
"I guess not, 'cause I don't think you have to get causality to not get confused while watching it."
"There's your answer." He turned to his daughter, „Come on, let's go visit mommy and the baby." Samantha clapped in her hands and hopped off the desk with enthusiasm obviously looking forward to the visit.
"Can we watch Star Wars when we get home?" the little girl asked as she took her father's offered hand and both of them made their way out of the office. "Bye Auntie Penny, bye Uncle Derek!" she shouted over her shoulder,
Morgan and Garcia who heard his last words knew that he would cave sooner or later. How could he not, when Samantha had him wrapped around her finger like she did? At least they could look forward to another interesting recounting of a movie.
This one shot was inspired by a video I saw on youtube. Just search for Star Wars according to a 3 year old.
Please be gentle as English is not my native language but tell me if you find spelling or grammar mistakes. (Except Samantha's of course.) Thank you for taking the time to read this.