A/N: I don't know where this one came from. My mind told me to write this so it did. Unbeta-ed so any mistakes are mine. Please read and review. Thank you.
Purple People Eater
Rodney sat cowering in the bed, shaking as he pulled the sheet over head. The noises around him sound like teeth scrapping against the bones of their prey. A loud slam almost caused the frightened scientist to almost leap off the bed. He hesitated to sneak a peek out from the little protection the thin sheet offered, but for now, it offered the best protection from the jungle that surrounded him.
In a moment of bravery, Rodney dropped the sheet to see if flying creatures were still thirsty for his blood. When he saw the neon blur aiming for his head, the sheet was thrown back over his head, but not before he let out a high-pitched scream. The world was much safer here and nothing could get to him, especially the beast that tried to kill him a short time ago. He clutched his wounded arm that had only a tiny puncture mark as if someone had just cut off half his arm The wretched whimpering made it sound as if physicist was in complete agony.
"What happened to you, Doc?" John approached the woman hunched over the computer, reading results off the computer. Jennifer's left forearm was bandaged up and it looked like she was in pain whenever she tried to move the limb.
"Got bit," Jennifer slightly raised her arm.
"And that is something new?" he joked, hoping to make the woman at least crack a smile. Sheppard did not expect the comment her got back.
"First time that blood was drawn," the unamused woman said in a voice lacking any emotion. "I was trying to take a blood sample when Rodney sunk his teeth into my arm and said 'Begone you, demonic purple people eater.' It's not funny." Jennifer glared as she saw John trying not to laugh.
John regained his composure, "I take it that the cream the natives gave him was not sun block."
Jennifer shook her head, "It has sun block properties, but it also has trace elements of something with a similar chemical composition to LSD. There must be something in their genetic makeup that makes them unaffected by LSD properties." The natives of Opiata seemed very lucid during the negotiations and there was no reason to believe anything was wrong when they offered the cream as Rodney complained about the strong sun.
"So McKay is just having a really bad trip? So in a few hours Rodney will be back to his cranky self?"Leave it to Rodney to have his obsession with protecting his fair skin to backfire so badly.
"Yes. He will be back to himself soon."
A coy smirk spread across Sheppard's face as he stuffed his hands into his pockets and walked away humming Purple People Eater. He did not see the rude gesture the normally calm physician made behind his back.
End A/N: "Purple People Eater" is a novelty song, written and performed by Sheb Wooley, that reached #1 in the Billboard pop charts in 1958.