Going Mad

The queen quietly slipped out from under the covers, careful not to waken the king. She had had another unpleasant dream. It made her furious whenever she had these flashes of the past. They were nightmares. Nightmares that scared her. And being scared is a sign of weakness. And she wasn't afraid of anything. Not anymore.

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She was in her bed sleeping soundly. Suddenly she was being violently shaken awake. Her mother stood over her, "Wake up!"

"What's the matter, mother?"

"There's no time to explain. Just get up and put your clothes on. We must leave now."

"Where are we going?"

"Didn't I just tell you not to question me? Now get moving!"

"Yes, mother, of course."

She fumbled around in the dark, searching for her dress. She finally found it kicked up underneath the bed. When she was dressed, she followed her mother through the dark passages.

As she walked with her mother she made sure to stick close to her side. The occasional torch cast dancing shadows along the stone walls, and they reminded her of the monsters in the stories her and her sister used to come up with to scare each other.

She realized when they rounded another corner that they were making their way towards the gardens.

"Mother, why are we going outside?"

"Shhh, be quiet they might here us."

"Who are 'they'?"

"The guards. They captured your father and sister, and now they're looking for us."

"The guards! But why?"

"Apparently there has been an uprising among your father's subjects. The guards, the servants, even the knights have all turned against us."

"But why? Father has been nothing but just to everyone. He rules with wisdom and kindness."

"I know my dear. The world is a cruel and unfair place. That is why we must escape. We must leave and never return."

As they were whispering to each other they had hidden themselves among the shrubbery, careful not to make noise. Peering through the leaves into the darkness, she had the sudden feeling that she was alone. She twisted around wildly searching for her mother.

"Mother?Mother? Mother? Where are you, mother? "

"Your mum ain't 'ere, sweet' art. In fact, she with your pa and sis right now. How would you like to go join 'em? "

She quickly spun around to face the guard. Complete and utter horror washed over her. She tried to jump back, but there was no use. He had grabbed her arm and was dragging her towards the dungeons.

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She hadn't had that dream in a long time. It always ended there. For that she could at least be thankful for.

Thankful that she didn't have to relive watching her family be tortured.

Thankful that she didn't have to go through the pain of watching first her father and then her mother get beheaded.

Thankful she didn't have to watch as her sister fell gasping with sobs to the ground, and only she left trying to console her.

Thankful that she didn't have to relive the feeling of being completely alone after her sister had died. She had always been so fragile.

And thankful she didn't have to go through the shame of being a servant in her own home. Being treated like the scum of the earth when she used to be the highest there was.

But she had won in the end, hadn't she. She had done the exact same thing to them that they had done to her family. She went behind their backs and gathered an army, full of loyal subjects. It turned out that it was really her father's counselor who was so power hungry. Not the villagers.

And then when she had enough numbers. She attacked. She captured every single person in that retched castle. And then she killed them. Each and every one of them. Took them outside and beheaded them. Just like they did to her parents.

Nobody understands why she has to behead still. They don't understand that she has to nip any bit of rebellion in the bud. She can't have what happened to her family happen again. She can't handle the hurt.

So she'll go on pretending she's alright. That it doesn't bother her that everybody thinks she's a tyrant. Because she knows the truth. The truth is that if she trusts anyone, they'll only end up hurting her in the end.




Hiding a heart

Full of hurt and pain

Can slowly but surely

Drive you insane