Sirius awoke earlier than usual to the sound of paper flipping.
Groaning, he cracked his eyelids and saw Remus lying next to him on the pillows. One arm was bent behind his head, the other holding their linked journal open on his chest as he looked down on it, reading silently. The curtains were shut but a sliver of space between two of them let in a stream of morning light.
"Good morning," Remus whispered. His eyes were still sliding slowly along the page.
Sirius rubbed his face in fatigue.
"Mmm… was I snoring?"
"Yeah, a bit," Remus smirked.
"Well, good morning to you, too," he slurred.
Remus turned his head to look at him, an eyebrow cocked up.
"Anything else you want to say to me?"
Sirius scrunched up his face defensively.
"Huh? What else would I have to— oh," he groaned and turned his face into Remus' arm where it met the mattress.
"Happy birthday," he muffled into the sheets in shame.
"Thanks," he whispered back. "I finally got around to reading that letter of yours."
Sirius lifted his head and looked down at him.
"Oh," he said.
Remus' eyes flicked up and they held each other's gaze for a moment.
Remus had been breaking through several barriers recently, ever since their explosive argument in the Room of Requirement just over two weeks ago. They'd gotten into the habit of falling asleep together every Friday night, when they knew the others would get up later than usual the next day.
In those late night hours, under the cover of complete darkness when Sirius couldn't see his face even with their noses touching, Remus had poured out all his memories. Everything that haunted and tormented him from his time in captivity, it all came spilling out in painful detail.
Most of it was hard for Sirius to hear, but he was at least thankful for the darkness. He didn't have to worry about controlling the disgust and anger that seeped into his expression.
Amidst all of it though, Remus still hadn't gotten around to reading that final letter. Sirius had all but forgotten of it, mostly because he was more concerned with hearing what Remus needed to say than putting any added burden onto his shoulders.
As they laid there, both waiting for the other to speak, Sirius held onto his amber eyes and flushed in apprehension. Remus broke contact first, glancing over and lifting his hand to ghost the back of his fingers over Sirius' ear.
"Your ears are all red," he whispered. "What's the matter?"
Sirius shivered from the touch and cleared his throat gruffly, shaking his head.
"Nothing. That letter's just really…. personal..."
Remus looked down again, chewing the inside of his lip.
"Do you actually want to spend the rest of your life with me? Or was that something you only meant in hindsight?"
"I don't think I would have ever said it if I hadn't thought you dead," he admitted. "But I meant it. And I still do."
Remus paused for a moment and then smiled, not looking at him, and moved his fingers over a spot on the page. Sirius turned his head and saw the pads of his fingers tracing the words I love you, I love you, I love you.
"I meant that, too," he said, turning back and grinning broadly.
"And what happens when you get tired of me and feel like shagging… I dunno… Lola, or someone?"
"Moony, I love you, but… I'll always want to shag Lola."
Remus snapped the journal shut and wacked him over the head with it.
Sirius ducked and laughed loudly into Remus' neck.
"Hey! I said I want to, not that I'm going to."
"Don't pretend you never gawk over her cleavage, I've caught you at it."
Remus opened his mouth to protest, but then reconsidered.
"Fine. I don't bloody gawk at her though—,"
"Yeah, yeah," Sirius yawned, nuzzling closer into Remus' shoulder and pressing his lips into the tanned freckled skin.
Remus sighed and leaned into him.
"Sorry you had to go through all that… thinking I was dead and all…," he whispered
Sirius shook his head, running his lips along the smaller boys shoulder.
"It's nothing compared to what you went through."
Remus reached up and slid his hands into Sirius' rumpled hair, pulling him closer until he was on top of him.
"It could be just like this, forever," he sighed. "Just take me away."
Sirius paused for a moment, looking down at the brown haired boy in the dim morning light, all mussed up from sleep and completely fucking gorgeous.
"Would you want to move in together?" he asked.
Time itself seemed to stall as Remus froze, like a deer trapped in the headlights, and Sirius immediately began building a brick wall around his heart to protect it against any harm...
But then, almost inaudibly, Remus' breath hitched. His eyes darted back and forth between Sirius' until… a small grin hitched on the corner of his mouth and, ever so slightly, he nodded.
Sirius beamed and leaned down to capture Remus' mouth with his own.
In seconds they were ravishing each other, tearing frantically at clothes and sheets and hair, and god just needing to be closer. Sharp gasps for air and moans escaped them as they writhed against the other. As their lack of air peaked, Remus reached up and pulled roughly on Sirius' hair, yanking his head back and biting hard into the nape of his neck.
Moaning, Sirius ground his hips harder down into Remus' growing erection, almost thrown over the edge by the pain and pressure of Remus' teeth gripping onto him. Something untamed released inside his chest, overpowered by the pure animalistic lust that only Remus could bring to the surface.
He fumbled and reached down to grasp the other boys erection, stroking it roughly as he arched up in response.
"Oh…," Remus moaned, staring down with an almost pained expression as Sirius slicked his hand with precum and began pumping the shaft in a steady rhythm.
Wet, indecent sounds filled the air as his hand moved faster and Remus began panting harder, his eyes closing, head tipping back in ecstasy. His hand came up to brace himself on Sirius' shoulder and his hips began thrusting upwards in sync with the other boys strokes.
Not wanting it to end so soon, Sirius slowed his hand and rutted hard against him once before leaning up and capturing Remus' lips in a fierce kiss. The other boy pulled him in closer, crushing their mouths together hungrily.
Remus' fingers scrambled against the mattress and then snatched up his wand to place a silencing charm on the curtains.
Sirius had reached for his own wand, ready to perform their usual spells, when Remus blocked it with his hand, shaking his head.
"It doesn't work anymore."
Sirius frowned. Remus grinned almost guiltily.
"That spell only ever worked by turning pain nerves into pleasure. But we've been going at it too often these last few week's… ," he sniggered, "it wouldn't hurt anymore, so that spell has no effect."
Sirius scowled, calculating something.
"So it won't feel good for you? You won't feel anything from now on?"
"It might. I dunno. But I can't feel anything with that spell masking all my nerves, so it's just better to go without it."
Sirius lowered his eyes.
"Oh…" he said. "…well…I'm still doing the cleaning charm…"
Remus burst out laughing. His lithe body wriggled as Sirius, grinning wickedly at his amusement, stripped the rest of his clothes off.
Licking his lips, Sirius leaned up and placed a quick affectionate kiss on Remus' mouth. As he moved lower again, Remus held onto the brim of his black t-shirt and peeled it off him.
"There you are," Remus breathed, staring at the newly exposed chest.
Sirius shivered under the hunger of his eyes. They gazed lower until they were fixated on the trail of black pubic hair that disappeared into the drawstring of his pajamas. He reached to push them off his hips, then pulled Sirius forward until their erections were flush-against each other.
"Uunnggh," Sirius moaned, tipping his head into Remus' neck and bucking desperately into him.
The friction against his cock and Remus' moaning breath in his ear had Sirius reeling. Electric pleasure shot through both of them with each thrust, Remus' fingers digging painfully into Sirius' back as he held on. Both of them were panting and sweating, their hair plastered to their foreheads, trembling in need.
Remus seemed to notice Sirius shaking more and more, and slid his hand down to stop his motions.
"Not so fast, love," he whispered hotly into his ear.
Sirius pulled together all the self-control he had and pushed himself up to straddle Remus' hips.
"You sure you don't want that spell?" he breathed.
Remus shook his head, casting a lub charm on Sirius' member and egging him forward.
Extremely aware of the absence of any pain-relievers, he crouched forward to kiss Remus tenderly as he pushed in slower than he ever had before. And fuck it was so warm and tight, and all he wanted to do was pound into him relentlessly, but he needed to somehow make this good for him too…
Sirius ended their kiss when he was completely sheathed inside and wrapped his hand around the base of Remus' member, grinning as the other boy arched his back, hair splayed on the pillow, lips falling open with a small whimper.
Biting his lower lip, he began thrusting and stroking in rhythm, gazing at Remus' face to read his reaction.
"Oh… oh….," Remus moaned, eyes fluttering closed in ecstasy. His own hips began thrusting involuntarily with Sirius' strokes.
Sirius felt his knees slipping on the sheets and pushed forward for better leverage, when—
Remus' eyes flew open and he convulsed forward, gasping in shock.
"Wha—? Oh shit, I'm sorry!" Sirius said hurriedly, pulling out and grabbing Remus by the shoulders to comfort him.
"No, it's not—,"
"I didn't mean to—,"
"I'm so sorry—,"
Sirius cringed away but stopped talking, expecting Remus to push him off and forget about finishing. But instead, he pulled Sirius in roughly by his hips and moaned wantonly against his lips.
"For the love of god, do that to me again."
Remus had a silly euphoric expression on his face and a grin tugging on the corner of his mouth.
"I don't know what the hell you just did, but it was incredible," he breathed.
Sirius felt his heart skip a beat as Remus hitched his leg around Sirius' thigh to pull him closer, and then rolled his hips up until their cocks dragged together.
"Please," he begged longingly.
Sirius, a little unnerved but more turned on than he'd ever been in his life, adjusted himself again and thrust in. And then, trying to mimic what he'd done the last time, he leaned up on his knees until Remus' pelvis was at a slightly higher angle.
Face set in concentration, he thrust in a few times, shifting slightly each entry until—
Sirius grinned as Remus' cock visibly pulsed. A surprised "Uh!" escaped his mouth and he clutched at Sirius in blind desperation.
"You like that?" Sirius whispered sinfully, pulling back and slamming back in pointedly.
Remus' beautiful face was contorted in pleasure as he moaned insatiably. Sirius sped up until the headboard was slammed into the wall and his muscles were cramping from the strain, but he was too lost in arousal. The very sight of Remus losing all control was too provocative for Sirius to bear, and he could feel his cock hardening and the pressure building too fast too soon—
"Remus— I'm gonna—," he moaned.
But Remus was still ahead of him. Reaching down, he grasped his leaking member, breath hitching every time Sirius thrust into him until his body clenched around Sirius' cock and—
"Sirius…" he choked out, and then he was cumming and cumming, spurting hard as Sirius hit that spot one more time—
Sirius lost it. Eyes watering from the pleasure, his orgasm rocked through him and Remus had to reach up to hold him as he pitched forward. Delicious ecstasy washed over his body as he thrust into completion, the ache in his cock receding as he slowly came down from his high.
"Remus," he sighed, lifting his head to look down at the other boy. "That was…"
He cast around for the right words but couldn't finish. Remus grinned and nodded in agreement.
"Yeah… it was," he whispered back.
Remus pulled him in by the back of the head to snog him senseless, rolling them over until he was straddling Sirius' waist before pulling up.
"I need to shower," he said breathlessly. "If the others aren't around, meet me in there in five."
And with a mischievous grin, he pulled his robe around him and grabbed a towel before slipping out the curtains toward the bathroom.
Sirius laid there as the minutes slid by, head still buzzing in euphoria. He'd never imagined it would be that incredible without all their usual spells… he needed to figure out what hell that thing was inside Remus that made him go wild, and see if he had it himself…
"Padfoot? Are you in there?"
Sirius jumped at the sound of James' voice outside the curtains.
"Hold on! I mean—," he grabbed up his wand and uttered the counter-spell to the Silencing Charm. "Just a second!"
Pulling his pajamas on frantically, he cast his wand around, throwing cleansing charms at the sheets and then tried to smooth his hair flat. He snatched up Remus' crumpled clothes and shoved them under the pillows before clearing his throat and pulling back the curtains.
James looked around suspiciously at the bed and then half-glanced at the bathroom door where the sound of slapping water on shower tiles could be heard.
"Moony doing alright?" he asked, sitting down and leaning against the footboard. Sirius settled back against the headboard and shrugged.
"I guess so, you see him as often as I do."
James arched an eyebrow at him.
"I just saw him sneak out of here and into the bathroom," he said bluntly.
Sirius froze, trying to think of a good excuse. James saw the expression on his face and let out a burst of laughter.
"You're fuckin' terrible at lying."
James stopped laughing and fiddled with a string on the bedspread.
"So you two… are you… getting serious?"
Sirius considered him for a moment.
"Yeah, I guess so. And actually… we're probably going to be moving in together this summer."
James blinked and stared at Sirius like he'd just sprouted tentacles.
Sirius fidgeted uncomfortably.
Shit… this was harder than he'd thought it would be…
James' eyes darted around, wearing a troubled calculating expression on his face.
"Are you in love with him?" he said finally.
It was almost an accusation.
Sirius winced. He didn't want to touch the subject of "love" with a ten foot pole around James.
"Look, Prongs… this isn't going to change anything. It's not like I'm replacing you."
James' animosity slipped for a second, seemingly reassured. But then his brow furrowed as he realized Sirius hadn't properly answered his question.
"You two aren't in love… are you?"
"Why do you care?"
James just looked at him, and Sirius knew he could see right through him. He didn't even know why he bothered trying to hide anything from James anymore. They'd been together for so long their minds might as well be telepathically connected.
Looking down again, James pulled the string out of the blanket and rolled it between his fingers. For some reason, something about him seemed softened.
"Did you ever have a secret girlfriend I never knew about? Or have you always been bent?"
He wasn't angry anymore. He was smirking across the bed at Sirius in jest.
"I'm not bent," Sirius said, kicking him. "And I never wanted to like him. I never wanted any of this before it happened, so don't go judging cos you don't know how weird it feels—."
"You think I don't?"
Sirius blinked and then realized he was talking about Lily.
James resumed his fiddling with the stitches.
"Look, mate, she'll come around…"
Sirius hesitated. He really didn't know what to tell him.
"She's changed, though. I think she's already starting to get used to you."
James continued to brood, but in spite of himself, glanced up at Sirius hopefully.
"You think so?"
"Wait…" James said frowning. "I thought you hated her?"
"Nah, I don't hate her," he said, thinking back to their conversation on the train. "She's not so bad anymore. At least she's not friends with Snape now, cos that was a deal-breaker."
James nodded, but seemed lost in his own thoughts. Sirius glanced around and, not seeing anyone else in the room, decided to ask James something that had been nagging at the back of his mind for a while.
"You don't hate that I'm with Remus, do you?"
James looked up at him. His expression was one of extreme uncomfort, but then his eyes darted sideways for a moment, staring into the wall in contemplation. Finally, after twitching his feet and pulling a few more threads from the bedspread, he responded hesitantly.
"It is hard to get used to…"
Sirius' stomach lurched and his spirits sank in disappointment.
Sirius looked back up and saw James surveying him.
"... if you make each other happy, then…I'm happy for you… really. I am."
Sirius raised his eyebrows as if asking "You sure?" and then burst out smiling. James grinned back and shook his head again, swinging his legs over to climb off the bed.
"C'mon, you flaming queen. Our 'Spitting Tea Spoons' just came in from London and they're not going to put themselves on the Slytherin table… "
Sirius reached up to wipe the sweat from his brow before looking down to check the time and distance on his watchband. It was later that afternoon and he was jogging steadily beside Remus. They were making their rounds of the Quidditch pitch, just like they had every weekend since the middle of January.
They had began, all those weeks ago, by just walking around the track, then working up to climbing the stadium bleachers, then to light jogging, then to running. Sirius made sure to brew several batches of potions that would make the work-outs easier, and potions that helped lock-in any muscle mass Remus gained. It was definitely paying off. If he hadn't seen him in the worst of it, Sirius would never have known anything bad had happened to him. He was just as healthy now as he had been a year ago, and he was going to prove it right here and now.
Reaching up to adjust a dial on his watch, he waited until they drew closer to the white starting mark on the track before pressing the dial inward and speeding up.
"C'mon, race me," he called over his shoulder as he swept past Remus and ran full-out around the curve.
He heard Remus speed up too, drawing even with him as they flew past the half-way mark. He glanced sideways and saw Remus' face set in concentration, his breathing more even-paced than it had ever been before during these sessions. Sirius pushed himself to go faster, trying to get Remus to catch up. But he was startled when Remus not only stayed at his level, but then passed him as they came back around to the white starting line until he had finished first with a good two-foot gap between them.
Winded, Sirius padded to a stop as Remus sprawled down on the dirt and crossed his arms behind his head, heaving for oxygen.
"Damn," Sirius breathed, utterly impressed. "Not bad, Moony."
Remus grinned and reached down with one hand to clutch a stitch in his side.
"How… far… was that?" Remus panted.
Sirius straightened up and checked the final counts on his watch.
"Five miles in fourty-eight minutes, but that isn't including our warm-up. And that last half-mile took less than four minutes."
Remus, still completely out of breath, burst into a smile.
"Here," Sirius said, pulling a vial from his pocket and uncorking it. "One last potion and then we can head in. I think there's a birthday cake waiting for you upstairs."
"Oh, please tell me it's chocolate," Remus moaned before taking the potion and throwing it back, still lying sprawled on the ground. Immediately his breathing slowed to normal and he stopped holding the cramp in his side.
"I believe it's dark chocolate with strawberries on it," Sirius grinned, offering his hand to Remus who took it and pulled himself up.
Remus swayed a bit as he regained his balance but then grinned, reaching out to grab Sirius' face to place a solid, smacking kiss on him.
"I feel… really great right now," he breathed woozily.
Sirius, never able to keep himself pulled together when Remus kissed him, started babbling.
"I think that's the endorphones or the pheromones or the— hormones? Or the… I don't know what I'm talking about right now…" he trailed off as Remus roared with laughter and dragged him by the arm towards to Quidditch locker rooms.
Sirius regained his full mind as they entered the shower area and pushed Remus down into one of the wooden benches.
"We still have some time to kill…" he said, kneeling down before him between his legs. "What do you want? Anything."
He breathed the last word, quivering in arousal.
Remus tipped his head sideways, reaching up to run a hand through Sirius' hair, grinning at him.
"This morning was… amazing," he said. "But…" he whispered softly, leaning in and pulling Sirius closer by the back of his head, "this time… I want to ride you."
A shiver ran through his spine at the sultry tone in Remus' voice.
"Gods…," he whispered, reached down and struggling with the drawstring on his running pants.
Remus leaned in to capture his lips, fighting for air as their arousals grew. In mutual sexual frustration they both abandoned their struggles to remove their clothes and just latched on to the other, pulling closer, caressing torsos and shoulders and necks as their mouths drew feverishly together. Sirius' hands slid down and stroked over the hardened bulge on Remus' crotch.
"Uhnng…," Remus moaned, breaking away with his eyes closed tight in desire.
"Does that feel good?" Sirius asked, wrapping his hand around the member through the slippery athletic fiber. "Yeah? You want to put it in my mouth?"
Remus buried his face in Sirius neck, moaning and thrusting into his hand. Sirius smirked to himself. Remus definitely had a thing for dirty talk…
"I love how big your cock gets like this… fuck, I want to taste you… do you want me to suck your cock? Do you want to slide it in my mouth and fuck my throat with it?"
Remus whimpered as if in agony, shaking with desire as he clung to Sirius for support.
Swiftly, Sirius reached for his wand and adjusted the temperature in the room. The air turned hot and sticky as he directed his wand at the nearest shower faucet, turning it on until warm water streamed around them, steam rising, fogging their senses deliciously.
Sirius flicked his wand at their bodies and their clothes vanished. He threw his wand aside, pushed Remus roughly into the tile wall and then leaned down to suck the length of his burning hot member into his mouth.
He didn't need spells anymore. He just wanted to taste Remus, raw and undiluted, savoring the intoxicating essence of his arousal. Sucking hard, he slid his lips slowly down the shaft until Remus' scent was filling up his senses and the slick head was thrusting in and out of his throat.
"Guh… wait… shit, Sirius!"
There was a hand in his hair, pulling him up and away forcefully. He reeled back and saw Remus reach down to squeeze the base of his cock, tensing up cautiously. After a moment though he sighed in relief and then lunged forward, pushing Sirius back onto the floor of the steaming shower tiles as he climbed on top of him and straddled his hips.
"God, I just want you inside me," he moaned deliriously, grasping Sirius' member and positioning it against himself.
Sirius almost came right then as Remus rolled his pelvis and eased himself down onto him. Biting his lip, he rose up on his knees and then lowered, circling his hips as he tried to find the same spot they'd discovered earlier that morning.
"Oh, yeah… fuck yourself on me," Sirius breathed, placing his hands on either side of the smaller boys hipbones and watching as his member slide in and out of Remus' tight hole.
"Oh!" Remus gasped suddenly. "I think… I found it…"
He lifted up again and then slammed back down, this time moaning wantonly, his cock twitching and spurting a droplet of precum.
"What's it feel like?" Sirius whispered, trying his hardest not to cum. He wanted to see Remus get off using his hard dick, and he was going to do everything in his power to stave off ejaculating until then.
"It feels like…" Remus moaned again as he moved back down. "It feels like you're stroking my cock, but in my arse…it just feels… so… uungh…"
Remus leaned forward and braced himself on Sirius' chest as he began fucking himself up and down faster and harder than before, his beautiful features screwed up in desire.
"Yes," Sirius hissed through gritted teeth, watching their hips, eyes focused now on Remus' bobbing member.
"Keep talking," Remus moaned. "Please…"
He reached up to clutch his hair brown with one hand, completely lost in sensation as he rode Sirius relentlessly, lashes fluttering madly as he tried to keep his eyes open.
This was the side of Remus that Sirius lived to see— the Remus no one else in the world knew except for him. This wild, untamed creature Remus turned into when he let down his guard and forgot about all pretense. It was the hottest thing in the world to see his sweet, mild little Remus transform into a writhing, cock-hungry slut who came undone from the filthiest words. Nothing else on earth turned him on like the way Remus got when he was like this…
Refocusing his attention, Sirius began thrusting back uncontrollably and tried to speak.
"Want you to cum in my mouth," Sirius groaned. It was the first and only thing he could think of right now as he gazed at the boy on top of him. "I wanna feel your cum sliding down my throat."
Remus abandoned his attempt to keep his eyes open and reached up to rub his palm into one of his nipples.
"Yeah, that's it… ram yourself on me till you can't fucking breathe anymore…"
Head tipping back, Remus arched his spine and rolled his hips hard into Sirius' pelvis. Gasping in shock, Sirius forced his mind to think about the most unpleasant situations his imagination was capable of to keep from losing all control.
"Shit!" he seethed, digging his nails into the creamy skin of Remus buttocks. It felt incredible and Remus looked sexier than all hell doing it.
Sirius felt his peak rising dangerously fast. There was too much pressure on his cock with Remus grinding into him, stimulating his balls and squeezing him deliciously as he rolled his hips and reached down to stroke himself over the edge as well—
"Fuck!" Sirius burst out as his cock exploded and his thighs trembled uncontrollably. Wave after wave crashed through him, every cell in his body lit on fire with the force of it.
With as much mental force as he could muster, he beckoned Remus forward with his hands, trying to pull him up his body as he begged, "Please, cum in my mouth... Please… shoot it down my throat, I want to swallow it."
Remus fell forward and, with Sirius pulling his hips upward towards his face, jerked his prick achingly until it throbbed in his fist and he came forcefully on Sirius' face and mouth. Licking what he could up, Sirius lifted his head and sucked the rest of Remus' orgasm from the tip before swallowing hard around him.
"Uungh…" Remus choked, the arm supporting his body shaking violently.
Panting hard, Sirius let Remus' spent cock slip from his lips. He ran his hands soothingly up and down Remus' still-clenching thighs as the other boy sat back onto his chest and reached up to stroke his face.
An exhausted little smile formed on Remus' features and he shook his head bemusedly before breathing,
"You've got to try this sometime."
"Pete, you've already had three pieces, how can you possibly still want more?"
"They weren't very big pieces."
"It's a four layer cake with filling, I assumed the height would account for the width."
Remus shoved Sirius in the shoulder and grabbed the knife from his hand to serve Peter another piece.
"Here, Wormy, don't listen to this idiot. He doesn't appreciate how good chocolate is."
"Yes I do…"
"No," Peter said with a mouthful of cake. "You really don't or you'd never stop eating this."
It was close to eleven and they were lounging around the Astronomy Tower waiting for their mid-term test to begin at midnight. They'd snuck up earlier than everyone else to set off fireworks, play a few games of chess and exploding snap, and finish off the rest of the cake and butterbeer from their earlier party. A small enchanted blue fire glowed in the center of their circle, keeping them warm from the chilly springtime breeze. Earlier, Sirius and James had slipped some vomit-inducing potion into Filch's dinner goblet, which kept him and his cat at bay for the evening.
Sirius lit off another sparkler and sent it up into the night sky, where it burst and multiplied into three other fireworks. They danced and skittered around before fizzling out and dropping silently into the inky blackness of the lake.
He glanced sideways and saw Remus follow its progression, the golden embers glittering in his brown eyes. Sirius' mind wandered for a bit as his eyes took in Remus' lips, his little freckled nose, and the soft brown hair that blew around in the wind. One lock fell forward into his eyes and he reached up to tuck it back, turning his head and—
"Damnit," Sirius thought as he looked away quickly. That must have been the fifth time Remus had caught him staring in the last hour alone.
"You almost ready for these exams, Moons?" James asked over a game of chess he was playing with Peter.
Remus went back to his book and nodded.
"I think so. Care of Magical Creatures will probably be the hardest since I wasn't here to actually tend to those pregnant unicorns."
"I don't think Kettleburn is going to test you on that, I heard him speaking with Slughorn about it," Sirius said as James' Queen pummeled Peter's Bishop. "But I'll write it all up for you to study anyways."
"Are you sure? When did you hear him say that?"
"I had to steal some ingredients from the potion supply closet and he was in the classroom with Slughorn. Slughorn's not letting you off the hook though, so you better know all your potions."
"Loony bastard," James muttered and Sirius grinned at him.
James leaned forward and pulled the Marauders Map out of his satchel.
"We're almost finished, mates!" he said, unraveling it and scanning the face for teachers.
"What else needs to be done?"
"Just a few spells to keep it hidden from teachers. And then let's see… we need to fix that glitch with our Animagus forms, our names haven't been appearing after we've transformed. Oh and, just so you all know, it's been listening to our conversations since yesterday."
James took a swig of butterbeer and, when no one responded, casually glanced up.
All three of them were staring at James as if he'd gone mad.
"What?" James yelped defensively.
"It's been listening to our conversations?" Peter repeated, eyebrows raised.
"Well, yeah, it needs to get a sense of our personalities. If, say…. I dunno… Snape for example gets his greasy hands on it, I want it to say something like— mind your own business, you ugly git."
Sirius roared with laughter.
"Why can't you just have a message that tells him to keep his nose out of other people's business?" Remus said, rolling his eyes but grinning anyways.
"Nah, this ways much more fun," Peter said. "We should have it say wash your hair, you slimeball."
"It probably will now that you've said it, it's still recording everything," James grinned as the others doubled over laughing. "But anyways—Mister Moony, would you do the honors?"
"It needs a few spells. I'll read them off and you cast them."
Sirius glanced over and saw Remus reach out to accept the parchment from James, his face set in determination. Sirius caught his eye for a moment and gave him a fraction of a nod for support.
"Alright then. Ready." Remus straightened up with his wand held aloft.
James flipped through one of his books, eyes scanning.
"This has two parts to it— Veritatum to keep it from lying and Perdere Imaginatio to keep from inventing details. Follow them with Servare Incantatum, and at the very end put the Perpetuum charm on it."
"I can't do Perpetuum—,"
"Yes you can," Sirius interjected.
"No I can't—"
"He can," Sirius whispered to James.
Remus did a double take indignantly.
"I can hear you, I'm sitting right here—,"
"Just get on with Moons," James laughed.
Remus glared at Sirius before clearing his throat and casting each spell. The parchment sat quite still during the process, with the only signals of disturbance being the swooshing sound of magic and the tiny balls of light that erupted from Remus' wand before disappearing into the surface of the map.
James read off several more spells— to guard against Dark Magic, to repeal revealing charms, to safeguard it from burning, and to place its trust only in true troublemakers— before James announced they were done with spells for the night.
"Alright then. Cast the Perpetuum charm and I'll finish up the cover art tomorrow. I'll need to do some more research to figure out how to keep our names when we're Animagus, though."
Sirius observed Remus expectantly. The smaller boy narrowed his eyes at him.
"That spell is beyond N.E.W.T. level. I can't do it," he reiterated point-blank, enunciating the last sentence for emphasis.
"You bloody well can so just shut up and cast it."
"Fine!" Remus spat impatiently. He jabbed his wand through the air, cried Perpetuum! forcefully in anger, and then rounded on Sirius.
"You see, you great prat, I can't—."
Remus stopped short and turned to stare at the parchment, frowning. The sound of a magical seal had just rent the air and the parchment glowed bright gold for a moment before darkening and returning to normal.
"Ha!" Peter barked before dissolving into peals of laughter.
"Note to self," James announced. "When in need of a difficult spell, get Moony seriously pissed off."
Remus was still blinking in disbelief at the map. Sirius sniggered in amusement at the astonished expression on his face until the brown eyes found their way to his.
"Told you," Sirius smirked.
Remus grinned despite himself and shook his head in bemusement as he tossed the parchment back to James.
Sirius leaned in to grab another firework to light off, and as he did so, Remus looked at him again and a beam of understanding shot between them.
Sirius knew how hard it was for Remus to trust in himself. In all their years on this earth, not one of them had experienced more pain, suffering, or self-hatred than Remus had in the past year alone. Fear and doubt would hang on his shoulders for years to come, and it was going to take constant positive reinforcement to rid it entirely. But no matter how hard it was going to be for Remus to get through these next few months, Sirius was going to be there.
There was no way in hell anyone was ever going to touch his Remus again. And there was no way in hell Remus would ever fail in his ambitions, not if Sirius had anything to say about it.
Tapping his wand once against the firework to light the fuse, he turned it over and, before it could fly off, muttered an alteration charm on it before throwing it skyward.
"Oy, look over there, is that one of Hagrids acromatulas?"
As James and Peter looked around curiously, Sirius swiftly leaned backward, twisting around to place a silent kiss on Remus' cheek, then whispering "Look up."
Remus, a bit surprised but not missing a beat, glanced upward and saw an exact replica of the Christmas mistletoe they had shared their first real kiss under more than a year ago bursting into sparkling embers as the firework exploded. Grinning, he turned back to Sirius and leaned in to capture his lips, kissing him tenderly for a moment.
"I don't see it! Where are you talking about?"
"Oh, sorry mates, I think it's just some gnarled root over there by the lake," Sirius grinned, pulling away and turning back around.
"Oh," James said in disappointment, sinking back on his knees. He looked up to see the firework and frowned. "Funny looking shape, that one."
"Yeah, what's it supposed to be?" Peter asked, cocking his heads sideways to see it at a different angle.
Both he and Remus doubled over laughing.
James and Peter looked at them curiously.
"What the hell? What's going on?"
"Nothing," Remus smirked.
James cast them an exasperated look, lifting his eyebrows suspiciously. Sirius just smiled back cockily.
"Where's the map? You check it for teachers again?"
"Yeah, looks like Sinistra is heading to her office," James muttered, scanning the surface. "And Evans— I mean, the rest of class— is already in the common room. We've got another five minutes before they're all up here."
They reached around, pulling their belongings into their bags and cleaning up the mess of their empty butterbeer bottles and cake remnants. When they had finished, Remus straightened up and stretched out his arm to James.
"Let me see that."
James handed it over.
"What are you planning on doing with it? We've already finished up all our mischief tonight."
"Yeah…," Remus murmured absentmindedly. He pulled out his wand and tapped the surface a few times. "Have you put any protective charms on it yet?"
"No, not yet."
"Well," Remus said smartly, flicking his wand in a complicated intricate motion, his eyebrows pulled together in concentration as he strung a slew of interlinking charms together. "Since our nightly escapade is over, let's just saaay…"
"Mischief managed," Sirius offered.
Remus grinned at him, looked back down at the map, and then tapped it one more time. A bright ray of scarlet shot from his wand and sunk itself into the ink on the page as he repeated,
:::Authors Final Notes:::
Well here we are. At the end. *sniffs*
I'm making a big deal about it cos this story is my baby :)
This story has been a long time coming. I've been mulling the ideas of it over in my head for about four years now. So my hope for it now that it's finished is that some of you will add it to your Favorites list and come back to it years later, the same way I go back to MY favorite stories years later and reread them like comfort-fiction. Thank you to everyone who has followed this story from start to finish. Thank you to those few who have reviewed each chapter as they finished reading them (I love raw reactions!). Thank you to everyone who has reviewed and added it to their Alerts and Favorites lists. Thank you to my beta's JesseBarbieHeart and DistantLands, and everyone who has helped find my little grammar errors (they are still being found, and until I find the last this story is technically still a work in progress).
And if I haven't thanked you yet, just… thank you for reading :)
~*BEHIND THE SCENES DETAILS*~
In my little world, Kate succeeds in her program and goes on to become a Healer at St. Mungos before being recruited by Dr. Leibrock. She moves to Quebec a year before the First Wizarding War ends and lives the rest of her life there. She never marries but she does adopt a three year-old girl in 1991 who had been bitten and then disowned by her family because of her lycanthropy. When Voldemort is defeated in 1998, her adopted daughter grows up in a world that is more accepting of werewolves, and she does not struggle to find work or social equality like Remus and Kate did. Kate dies in 2009 at the age of 64, which for a werewolf is a very good age to get to.
::Kate vs Kevin::
My character Kate was originally going to be an Irish man named "Kevin". I figured because I had already created a girl OC (Mary) I should branch out with a male OC. But no matter how I tried it, it didn't work. A freak accident where a "Kevin" was bitten wouldn't have revealed to him why Greyback hides underground or how he operates. But as soon as I re-thought the character and replaced it with a female, everything fell into place. It just made sense that a 14 year old Greyback, who'd been raised in a cruel environment and conditioned to favor the dark arts, would do something like capture a young pretty girl. It made sense that he would do everything to a her, instead of a him. It suited Greyback's personality much better, since in canon his dialogue has a tint of sexual threatening anyways. So "Kevin" became "Kate", and there ya go :P
As commented by Ron Weasley in the fifth Harry Potter book, the wizarding world does not recognize nor understand the meaning of the title "Doctor". When I was casually flicking through my old worn out books on a camping trip in June, I saw this and immediately burst out laughing at my mistake. But it's also kind of too late to change it, sooo… it's staying. Dr Leibrock is stuck with "Doctor" because frankly I'm just too lazy to go back and correct it :P
First of all, I love Wandplay!Sex. A lot. It's much cleaner than real sex and the possibilities are endless.
With that being said, I don't bullshit anything. So when I needed spells, I didn't just invent them randomly. I would look up real spells invented by JKR and then pull up another tab with Google translate, changing English-Latin. Most of my original spells can easily be translated back by simply going to Google and switching it around to translate Latin-English. Some of them are a weirder combination: for example, my fox conjuring spell Vulpesortia was inspired by Serpensortia, a mixture of the Latin word for snake and the French word Sortir for "to leave/come out of". This was of course used by Draco Malfoy in the second HP book. I liked it a lot, but I needed a less-evil creature that Remus (as a Gryffindor) would choose to conjure. So I settled on the idea of a red fox. I substituted the Latin snake word for the Latin fox word, Vulpes. Oppugno, used to make the foxes charge, is a spell from the books and is the Latin word for "attack".
I hope you enjoyed all my little spells, cos it was a lot of fun making them! :)
::Frank and Alice's age (which in my story is not the same as the Marauder's)::
JKR has never said when Frank and Alice attended school, but I think a lot of fan fiction authors like to portray them as school mates to the Marauders because they think Frank/Alice/Neville are supposed to mirror James/Lily/Harry exactly. But to me that doesn't make any sense. For them to graduate in the exact same year, get married around the same time, and then to have baby boys on the exact same day of the exact same year is completely unrealistic to me. Also, JKR has stated that it takes 3 years of training to become an Auror, so if Frank and Alice had been attacked at the age of 21 like Lily and James had, then they wouldn't have even had the time to become the "well respected Aurors" that Dumbledore calls them in the books. They would have literally graduated from training and then been tortured into insanity the next day practically. In my story, Frank is supposed to be 22 years old (having taken 3 years to become an Auror and then another year before they put him out into the field) and Alice, who is currently his fiancé in here, is 20 and still in training (which is why you don't see her during the battle). So in this reality, Frank and Alice are attacked by Death Eaters at the ages of 27 and 25 respectively.
::Remus and Sirius' sexuality (in MY story)::
They are both straight. With the exception of each other. You know that whole expression "Love is friendship set on fire."? That's what I was aiming at here. So yes, somewhere down the road in this reality, Remus still gets married to Tonks. I told you guys, it's canon. And for the record, I think Remus and Tonks are adorable. She's such a badass and is basically Sirius in girl-form (not as hot though). I know, it sucks, because their fates in canon are so god damn depressing it should be illegal, but KEEP IN MIND that they don't actually exhist in real life in the first place and therefore can have any happy ending we damn well want them to. So ha HA, take that miss Joanne-I-treat-my-best-characters-like-shit-Rowling! Take. That.
I would like to dedicate the Dom!Remus smut scene in chapter 29 to the anonymous troll who sometimes goes by the names Liz and Susan. I've seen this troll before (who apparently only posts a review to whine about how it, quote "sucks big time" that Remus is on top) and I deliberately re-wrote that entire scene to have Remus on top just for her. I wanted to see if this troll was reading my story and was ECSTATIC to find out she was. You see, trolls like this need to be put in their places. I do not want trolls like this as a part of my fan base, and am very pleased that I pissed her off. Something about the stupidity and the intolerance of her comments just really got on my nerves. My goal was to weed her out and it worked! So hopefully she is now gone and will never read this. I have not deleted her comment either and will wear it as a badge of honor for as long as this website survives. After all, to be insulted by a moron is the highest compliment anyone can hope to receive :)
p.s. to Katy: Thanks for the support girl, but she's not worth getting so mad about! Just laugh at her stupidity and move on :) *goes into happy zen-like place and hums like a Buddhist monk* :P
I'm writing another story right now. It is full of smut. LOTS of it. And it's really AU (and, as promised to Lizzy0308, this one will have a happy AU ending). Here is the preview/teaser that will hopefully get you all interested in reading it:
How had he not realized it before?
There were so many hints, so many clues that he had never bothered piecing together.
Remus, for the entire seven years they'd known him, had never made jokes about wanking off. He would appear annoyed whenever the subject of erections came up at all. Even Sirius' lewd posters of half-naked girls, while greatly appreciated by the other members of their dorm, seemed to do nothing but irritate him.
So as Sirius stared down at the mind-blowing paragraph on werewolf sexuality in the library's copy of 'Werewolves: Life Processes', everything seemed to snap into place like an incredible epiphany:
"From the moment a werewolf is confirmed as contaminated, a special magical operation is preformed on their reproductive organs. As a way of containing the werewolf population and ensuring their condition is not passed onto a baby, Healers in five countries around the world cast the Delere Libidinem spell. It is classified as a spell, but some werewolf activists consider it to be a curse. Whatever classification, though, Delere Libidinem is an extremely complicated enchantment which, when preformed right and alongside the Perpetuum charm, completely eliminates all sexual arousal in the patient. While their body still develops normally and goes through puberty, their sexual desire, lust for mates, or excitement of any kind in their genitalia never occurs. This spell should not be confused with Magical Castration, but it acts in a similar way to suppress all urges to reproduce. Delere Libidinem keeps the werewolf in a pre-puberty state of mind, even as their bodies develop naturally. Their thoughts are not drawn to members of society to which they would normally be attracted to, and chemicals which are usually released to stimulate sexual arousal are permanently blocked.
For the full history of the debate over its curse vs. spell classification, see Chapter 14, Werewolves: Civil Rights Struggles
The five countries which enforce the spell on all newly contaminated werewolves are as follows: South Africa, Brazil, Spain, United States, and United Kingdom."
Sirius finished re-reading and stared horrified at the article.
He looked up.
Remus was sitting across from him at the library table, bending over his NEWT level essay on the elements of a Corporeal Patronus.
"What are you reading? You look terrified."
So there it is! The story is going to focus on Sirius reversing the Delere Libidinem spell and then teaching Remus about all the sexual fun he's been missing out on! And somewhere along the way, he falls for Remus.
Smut Forever! Woot!
Nothing left to do except beg for your final opinions/reactions to Silver and Bullets. So without further ado: