Okay, so I'm in a huge Jogan mood right now. I actually am writing a couple of request fics for Jogan that I'm finishing up soon. But this idea just wouldn't leave my head. I wanted a more...bromantic moment between the two of them, and the only universe I saw that plausible in was Mad World. So this is just a little missing moment from just after chapter six that I wrote really quickly.
And I want to apologize to all of you who were expecting an update on Just Swing and Sway on Thursday. I mentioned that I had quite a few issues going on in chapter five, and they just continued getting worse. So I gave myself a break, but I will update this Thursday, I promise.
His eyes were burning from shedding the most tears he had cried in so many years. He wasn't sure how he was still even alive, his heart had shattered hours before. You couldn't live without your heart, right?
Logan's breaths were beginning to calm down from the erratic, panicky sounding ones. And he finally felt like he could speak without stuttering. He sniffled, mucus clogging his nasal passages and no longer allowing the scent from the pillow he clutched inside his nostrils.
The hand that had been rubbing his back for the better part of three hours had stopped thirty minutes before, but Logan knew James was still sitting behind him. Just silently waiting for him, like he always had. Yeah, he could probably see where someone could mistaken their close friendship for something more.
He wiggled around until he could turn over, pillow clutched to his chest as he stared at his best friend. James had taken to reading whatever novel was lying under Logan's bed as he waited, his eyebrows furrowed as he concentrated. Logan was impressed how far into the book he had already read, maybe he'd been out of it longer than he thought.
"If you think too hard, you could die." His voice was raspy from crying, but it got James' attention well enough. The taller brunette looked at him with worry but still managed to roll his eyes and smirk at his friend.
"You're full of shit." The smiled at each other briefly, but then simultaneously stopped, studying each other. "How are you doing, Loges?"
Logan shrugged awkwardly from his prone position, letting out a deep sigh. "Why does this hurt so bad, James? I barely know him." James smiled sardonically, reaching forward to run his hand through Logan's hair.
"I don't know, buddy. I guess sometimes you just know it's the one for you." He bit his lip, continuing to pet his friend's shaggy hair.
"You know this probably isn't helping the situation much." Logan half-smiled as James chuckled, yet he didn't stop the comforting gesture.
"I can understand the jealousy, but damn. How can he think there's something seriously going on between us? I mean, it's strictly platonic, and always has been."
Logan bit the inside of his lip. "Well," he began, pausing to smile sheepishly. "Not always." James' hand paused as he turned his head to the side.
Logan laughed, the motion feeling good after being pressed down so long with sad emotions. "I'll just confess to a few wet dreams from back in middle school. That's all."
James' eyes widened as he stared at Logan, then he burst out into loud guffaws that could wake the entire apartment. His face reddened as he laughed for another few minutes, wiping away a few stray tears of mirth from the corners of his eyes as Logan watched him with a smile. "I knew you had a thing for me, everyone does." Logan's hand shot out and slapped his cheek teasingly, trying to knock the cocky look off his face.
"It was a brief thing. I was a kid. Shut the fuck up." Logan grinned, not letting the situation get awkward, it was damn near impossible between the two of them. James leaned his chin against the edge of the bed, close to Logan's face.
"So you don't feel the desire to kiss me right now? At all?" His eyes were mischievous as he stared intently at Logan.
Logan studied him just as intently, his cheeks heating up minutely. Didn't matter how much he viewed James as his best friend, he was still a good looking guy. He scooted his face a little closer, noting the way the hazel-eyed boy's breath hitched a little bit. Then he brought the pillow away from his chest and tackled James with it, smothering his face for a few seconds while his friend laughed.
"Not. At. All." He bit out as the boy attempted to wrestle the pillow from between the two of them. Their laughter hindered either one of them from being serious about the impromptu match and eventually they just fell beside each other, breathing heavily. "Seriously, though." Logan panted, turning his head so he could look at his friend. "You're hot, but that crush ended within weeks. You tend to be high maintenance in your relationships...or not interested at all. Not my thing, bro."
James smiled softly at him. "Don't worry, I crushed on you for all of a month in seventh grade." He reached forward and thunked Logan on the forehead. "But then you started growing that hair. And that did it for me."
Logan gasped in outrage and smacked James in the face with the pillow again. "Kendall likes my hair." He responded smugly. And just like that, the lighthearted mood turned melancholy once again. "Do you think he'll ever talk to me again?"
James smiled comfortingly at him again, placing his large hand over Logan's shoulder and squeezing affectionately. "Of course, because you aren't going to give up on him. You love him and you don't just walk away from those you love." Logan sighed, biting at the edge of his lip. "Besides, if he doesn't talk to you soon, we'll make him."
He grinned at James. This was why he would always have a special place in Logan's heart, he knew exactly what to do to make everything okay in his world. A relationship was one of those things that either would or wouldn't work out between the two of them, but it wasn't even on the table. They were close enough to be brothers. And with him being so deeply in love with Kendall, he was just happy to have the brunette on his side.
He would have to make Kendall see. And he would, because it may not even matter to the blonde, but it mattered to Logan. It would always matter.